Twilight Tuna Part 1
Twilight Gets a Puppy
Season 4
By TDR
Twilight Tuna
Part 1
[Ponyville, four days after Daring Do saved the world....at least that's what her next book will say. Saturday, Fall]
“So how are the girls doing?” Rainbow Dash asked as she stretched out on one of the libraries bean bags flipping through of an old copy of Daring Do and the Viper's Kiss.
“You mean at the moment or in general?” Twilight asked.
“Pff in general your class thingy, right now they are probably setting fire to AJ's barn or something.” Dash scoffed.
[Sweet Apple Acres]
Applejack slowly blinked looking at the new barn.
The current betting pool for it's destruction had been two weeks.
It lasted an hour.
They hadn't even put the tools away yet.
The entire structure was encased in a massive block of ice that was lowly crushing the wood inside it as it melted and refroze instantly.
“We didn't do it!” Scootaloo shouted causing AJ to look over at the trio plus Spike who all looked like they had been set on fire. Even Spike who seemed really confused by that.
Twilight looked up from where she was trying to take a hammer and a chisel to the magic key box Harmony gave them and frowned.
“Mixed.” Twilight sighed.” I'm sure you know more about Scootaloo's progress than I do with flying, right now I'm trying to focus her energy on something constructive and she's trying to build a unicycle from a kit.”
“Yeah her flying is nuts. She never had a proper teacher show her things in the air so she's doing stuff she shouldn't be doing. And she's doing it well. There's almost no pegasus alive who can make a ninety degree turn at full speed, even my best was 98 degrees, not counting rain-boom powered, cause for some reason physics goes out the window when you break the sound barrier and you're leaving rainbow contrails. But Scoots evidently didn't get the memo about what she can't do and she's not only hit a ninety, she's hit as short as a twenty degree turn at her full speed, that shouldn't be possible. A normal pegasus would rip their own wings off with the sudden Gs. But those fire things she has seem to allow her to ignore that. Fillies gonna get into the Wonderbolts before I am. Heck, word is Spitfire and Soarin came to see her themselves not long after she got her cutie-mark. They're already scouting the girl.” Dash huffed.
Twilight opened her mouth to say something, then closed it. She had some bits riding on when Rainbow Dash would find out about Scootaloo's parents. Rahs had bits that Twilight would spoil it and she wasn't going to give her brother the easy win.
“Any way the thing with the unicycle, I got her instructions on the assembly, and some how she built a tricycle.” Twilight offered working a few little wires into one of the boxes locks as she tried to pick the box open.
“What?”
“I know right, I don't even know where she got the other two wheels.” Twilight huffed, her hair standing on end where a jolt of energy fried her lock picks and shocked her.” Sweetiebelle is doing fairly good. She's shown me some exercises that Luna showed her to gain more control of her magic, She has a deeper well of power than most unicorns her age too. So long as she keeps up her practice and studies she should be come quite the mage. I need to ask her parents why she hasn't been brought to Celestia's school for gifted ponies to be tested.... when ever they get back.”
“Yeah keep an eye on Sombra when they do. He's made it clear he wants 'words' with them.” Dash waved a hoof in the air.
“Lovely something else I need to keep an eye out for here.” Twilight sighed trying to open the box with a crowbar.
“Ehh don't worry about it, they need a good butt kicking to remind them they have a kid and Sombra won't do anything to upset Sweetiebelle.”
“What?” Twilight blinked, the crowbar sailing off across the room with a crash as she lost her grip on it.
“You haven't noticed? He's seriously overprotective of those three, they have him wrapped around their hoof despite how much he protests it.” Rainbow Dash offered.
“How the heck have I not noticed that?” Twilight grumbled.
“Cause you and him butt heads every chance you get. All you're gonna see is how much an ass he is. To be fair, he is still an ass, but he seems to at least try to be polite around Rarity and the Crusaders.” Rainbow Dash shrugged. “Besides Scootaloo told me some of the stuff he's done for them.”
“Oh.”
“So what about Bloom? She blow anything up yet?” Dash asked turning a page.
“Well she's getting potion training from Zecora most of the time, though Zecora's got her own style of zebra alchemy. Bloom wants to learn pony alchemy as well and see if she can mix them. So far all she's done though is make a flower cough.” Twilight offered and frowned at the box pulling a rather large mallet from under the table.
“How does a flower cough? I didn't think plans had lungs.” Dash responded.
“They don't and this one was overly dramatic about the coughing. I expect my brother had something to do with it either directly or indirectly.” Twilight huffed.
“Ahh don't blame it on him, Rahs can't be responsible for every dramatic thing that happens. After all Rarity was here long before you guys showed up.” Dash smirked.
“Point.”
“Where is he any way?” Rainbow Dash questioned.
“Trixie invited him on a date.” Twilight sighed laying her head down on the table, the mallet broken and laying off to the side.
“Bout time. How'd that go?”
[ Two days prior]
The front door of Golden Oaks library burst open with a crash. A light blue mare with a white mane and tail, a pointed purple hat, and a billowing cloak festooned with stars and moons strode in.
“Fuzzy!” Trixie shouted.
Twilight stared at the mare from the reception desk.
“Trixie this is a library, you need to be quiet.” Twilight fussed.
“Trixie is well aware of that fact Twilight, Trixie is also well aware that you live here and Trixie cannot shout for your brother silently.” Trixie explained.
Rahs took this moment to come down the stairs to see what was going on. Trixie smiled as she saw him and sashayed up to him.
“Fuzzy. You are going on a date with Trixie on Saturday. You will need to leave fairly early, unfortunately, to make it on time. Here is your train ticket, and please dress nicely.” Trixie stated. “There will be dancing.”
Rahs blinked looking down at her, his ears perked up as he was given the train ticket.
Trixie smiled putting a hoof on his chest and stood up on her back legs to kiss his cheek before dropping back down, her tail brushing against him as she sauntered out the door .” Don't be late Fuzzy” She called back..
Twilight and Rahs stared at the door as it closed blinking in confusion. After a moment there was a loud giggle and a squee from outside before the sound of hooves running off.
“Alright so that WAS Trixie and not Saturnia trying for a second date.” Twilight offered.
“Wait, when did Trixie learn how to vamp?” Rainbow Dash asked.
“No clue. Clearly Rahs was clueless as well with how stunned he was.”Twilight offered.
“Dang might need to revise the betting pool. She was the dark horse.” Dash pondered.
“Hmm?”Twilight questioned.“Trixie was? I though Sunset was the long shot?”
“She is too, but she had better odds than Trixie. Sunset's actively helping Applejack go after Rahs and some of the things she's suggesting are just.... wow. “ Dash whistled. ”It's pretty clear she's also taking after her dad and playing a long game here too, if she can't get him now she'll try to make sure AJ or one of the other mortal girls gets him so she can pick him up later in life after they've passed.”
“Umm.”
“Saturnia's pretty high on the list as well, cause come on, who wouldn't want some one who can turn into anything you want?” Dash explained. “AJ and Jynx are about even in they are the closest to what he is and any one with any sense can see he's attracted to them at least physically. Trixie is just kinda there, her only saving grace is she's an old friend of his. That's not much to go on, but it's a big hurdle to change foal hood friend into some one you wanna bang for some ponies.”
“And here I though Cadence was the match maker.” Twilight frowned.
“Pfft, I don't care about that. I got bits on the line here, so I'm keeping a close eye on this.” Dash huffed.
“Soooooo who are you betting on?” Twilight raised a brow.
“My money's on AJ. Rarity of course is supporting Jynx, Fluttershy likes Saturnia for some reason and Pinkie's betting on all of them.” Dash explained. ”Though she's changed that every time we allow a new bid when another one shows up.”
“What did Lyra say?” Twilight asked raising an eyebrow.
“About twelve different things. It's kinda weird, she hasn't tried to bet in the overall pool. Says it gives her a headache to think about it.” Dash waved a hoof.
“That worries me.” Twilight muttered.
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I forget, when did Scoots learn to fly?
Trixie learned to vamp? Whats that?
Lol
10283502
Here's the defintition since I had to look it up too.
10283494 The first time Sunnyset babysat them.
To quote RJ The Racoon from a Over the Hedge Comic Strip talking about Hammy. "To young to know better, to old to care" When he was doing a parade of butterflies
10283494
More of she learned how to summon and use fiery wings while the mane six were in Manehattan.
Ah, small snippets. They give me hope.
Love how Twilight is treating planetary magic item as a childs toy box. then again, she never has Sunsets problem of trying to open a girls universe shrink wrapped childs toy without specialist equipment?
Lyra is looking at the betting pool and getting quantum echos for alternates as well?
CMC stop giving Discord a raging boner when you guys walk into a room with tools
At least he isn't singing random songs and eating people
10283737
feed me semore feed me...is it bad i can do that in his voice perfectly?
You know at some point there should be a scene or two where Princess Celestia tries to apologize to the Apple family for what happened during the Witch Wolf scare.
It just bugs me because I find it hard to believe Applebloom didn't come away from that with nightmares, and Celestia has yet to react to the evidence that the Witch Wolf affliction is treatable.
I can't help but think there's enough material there for an interesting chapter or two where Celestia is plagued by self doubt over her actions but that's just me.
In any case glad to see you still going strong, keep up the great work!
"Every moment I live- is agony!"
10283870
The affliction isn't treatable. AJ and Ponyville in general are just weird. Also AB's night mare episode hasn't come up yet so she might be.
That betting pool over Rahs' love life is getting more complicated than 10 dimensional physics. Amusing to see which one each of the mane 6 are backing.
10283553
What chapter was that? I think I missed it!
10283921
Rarity Takes Moreton Bay Bug, Part 2
10283959
Thank you!
...huh
...she dosen't know?
It's very possible that Rahs only made that bet to keep you quiet until she finds out... for the drama
Eeeeeeeeeh
...........since when did I become Cadance 
The heck does "vamp" mean?
It probably should
10284076
verb
verb: vamp; 3rd person present: vamps; past tense: vamped; past participle: vamped; gerund or present participle: vamping
1. blatantly set out to attract.
I admit nothing
Omg Lyra is unable to bet someone call the gods her reality betting has been broken
I missed what her mark looks like. In addition, if the trio won't get their cutie-mark at the same time, I guess we can forgo the cutie-mark counseling related episodes in this universe, right?
10285298
Rarity takes Moreton Bay Bug
10283900
Fair enough! Really considering this is the only thing that's bugged me since I started reading all four stories I'd say you're doing something right. I just think it would behoove Celestia to do something nice for Applebloom to minimize the potential need for therapy. Maybe an 'I'm sorry I almost vaporized your sister' cake?
10285981
Do you really think she would take it?
10286068
Ooh, point taken. Ah well it was worth a mention. Oh and Team Trixie for the win
...vamp? She didn't suck anything though
10287699
She probably wants to eventually though
Love the series so far and before I speak, as of me writing this comment This chapter is as far as I have read into the story. I just feel the urge to post this and see if I'm right. Okay, I bet 10 bits on Lyra actually being the prophecy God or at least the child of it. yes, its a Zebra God but Lyra's seemingly perfect accuracy in betting is pretty suspicious. Can't wait to be proven either right or wrong!
Twi trying to break into the box was awesome. But we all know the only way she's getting it open without the keys is to rip a few holes in the multiverse and yank Littlepip into her Equestria.
Dash.... physics curled up in a ball and began weeping broken tears the moment a Pegasus made it into the ait, period. Let alone Rainboom.
Are we sure the CMC aren't all somehow related to Discord and/or Pinkie Pie?
I wonder besides Pinkie is anyone betting on a group marriage? That can make things far more interesting.
So far the Changeling is in front of best date.
Rahs girls get more open. Perhaps they can unlease the best hidden withhin
10642648
Well, Discy DID say they were delightful agents of chaos, right?
Also, that's one of the reasons I was glad when the series showed the Pegasi being unable to fly after Tirek stole their magic: Proof that magic is what allows them to fly, as their wings and bodies are entirely unsuited for it.
I just keep finding things I enjoy enough to want to comment every chapter... But to list a few:
A day after a friend mentions Army of Darkness to watch for Halloween, you had a reference in the story.
Then there's scorchero popping up, and DD's whole character was awesome...
The dates with Rah's, and the fact that Lyra won't/can't bet in the pool due to figuring out the odds giving her a headache. Lyra really is one of the best ponies...
The CMC developing talents and from the looks of it, no silly 'cutie mark at helping get cutie marks'.
Dash still not realizing who Scootaloo's parents are.
Sombro's arc looking out for the CMC.
Witch-Jack. Celestia's prank war. Sunset. The sirens. Discord always popping up when least expected. Shining constantly getting poison jokes over the link, and having to flee the horrible fate of two mares with over active libidos...
And for a minute there I thought Celestia was gonna take a swing at Saturnia. If anything happens to Saturnia it's straight onto Pinkie's black list for life, Celestia.
Anyway, that's just the stuff I loved that I can remember tonight. You've made the month of October very awesome.
Just like Murphy...
Rahs should try friends with benefits. Alone to mess with Twilight Friendship Portfolio ♡
11267953
Rofl I can just see that being added to her portfolio once she is aware of it
The gambling is clearly not about the money, a traditional thing for the future perhaps?
Why is Applejack even trying anymore with the Barn on the farm by now?