I'm a college student and member of many fandoms, including MLP. I'm a total Fluttercord shipper.
What if Twilight had remembered a reforming spell? How would this decision affect Discord, Fluttershy, herself, and the whole of Equestria?
Cover art made by TheOperaticOne
Russian translation: https://ficbook.net/readfic/9144801
Day Four of #FluttercordWeek
Featured on 1/23/20, 1/24/20, 1/26/20,
1/27/20, 1/28/20, and 1/29/20
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I love this story, but hate it at the same time, is that weird?
double standards, nice to see some ponies were able to know twilight fucked up. Dammit twilight, your the princess of friendship. That means making friends and not reforming those you don't think you can make friends with, then again I always had a theory that alicorns only talk the talk when not confronted with beings stronger than them. Whose to say she didn't reform anyone else with that spell or did some other stuff behind the scenes.
Lol
Hm... as they say... when you have a key don’t fool around with display cases when you can open the vault, Just order Discord to use his power to break the spell...
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This will be my headcanon.
.........I shouldn't have read this. I'm crying now.
I really, really shouldn't have read this.
I'm sorry, who the FUCK told you it was okay to play with my emotions like this?
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Will you be making a second part with discord getting his free will back?
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You love it because it’s so well written, and you hate it because the ending was so tragic. I feel the exact same way.
I really enjoyed this one; it's a great take of 'Twilight and misguided intentions gone awry.'
This is good, but it feels like there should be a part two. Otherwise it’s just a tragedy. Nice story. I’ll be watching you.
This was SO good. I had to wait all day to read it, since I didn't have time before work, and it was well worth the wait. I looove me some angst with the potential for an eventual happy ending.
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EXACTLY
I second, third, or fourth to those who feel this needs a second part! (If it’s something the writer can envision doing).
This was so very interesting to read. It’s not often you see many stories tackle Twilight acting in such a way that leads her down the morally gray path of acting in a selfish or potentially corruptive way. Gosh, all those friendship lessons and acts of giving other characters a chance (ie: such as Starlight and Thorax); it was both amazing and tragic to see just how so much could change by one alternative action.
I can’t believe I’m saying this, but in this story’s case: it serves you right, Twilight.
In a way, she’s made Sunset Shimmer look more redeemable in this alternate universe story. XD
I know this is meant to be a one shot, but could we still get a part two or and epilogue where Discord is free?
Reading this made me absolutely livid. I loved it.
nice little what if? twilight need for control got the better of her she could have used the spell more overtime scary thing it is poor discord.
brain blah here can skip!
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honestly, I was expecting in this what-if? to go darker with her control for the greater good getting worse and Fluttershy finally arguing which would have had twilight lash out at Fluttershy for not agreeing and acting properly the way twilight wants and then probably twilight tries to use discord to scare Fluttershy to see why the spell was right choice but doesn't work discord resists that then twilight uses the spell on him again but he still doesn't act out at Fluttershy probably twilight would have tried to use the reform spell on Fluttershy then cause if it works for discord then ponies would be the next step anything to help her friend understand... I think spike would have got Celestia before that happened I bet he sent messages to her in worry
I hate this dark scenario I wrote.
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a tragic story I can see Fluttershy spending her whole life with discord and he with her but it gonna be sad later...
with her natural lifespan, I wonder if she would be changed into an alicorn or something else heck if it went with merge with discord I think she would give anything for him at that point
Woah :o Just... woah:0 That was powerful:0 Welp, it's official. I found another favorite story of yours for my "GeekCat story collection"^^ I can't decide which out of three stories do I love more^^ But for now, I will say this one is my favorite because there is so much going on, but in a good way^^ I love the ending because it makes me want a sequel but it can work as a one shot and end here and thus leave us in an emotional state either wayXD I'm really curious if you will pursue a sequel because that would be amazing and you can do sooo much in a sequel:D But if you don't, no worries and this ending will satisfy me... even though it leaves me in a emotional state just begging for Discord to regain his free will back :'( My only complaint for this story is that we didn't get enough of the mindset of the rest of the Mane Six, how they felt about Discord's state, and how they felt about Twilight's slow descend to becoming the villian of her own and why they didn't confront Twilight sooner. But other than that, this is perfect^^
That was exceptionally dark and depressing AU. I felt uncomfortable the entire way through. Well done.
Honestly I'm surprised your Twilight didn't start using that spell on all the villains. A brainwashed Starlight, Chrysalis, Tirek, Sunset, Tempest, ect. The princess of forced friendship.
Not the first fic I've read where Twilight gets addicted to mind control. The other one's M rated, though.
I was really hoping it would continue, with the gradual recovery of Discord, maybe him even becoming able to interact with other ponies, and eventual complete recovery.
Dark as fuck, but well-done at the same time. All I can say is, "thanks I hate it".
10047487
That's kinda what I was expecting to happen. After all, when all you have is a hammer... everything looks like a nail.
10047527
Once you have Discord at your beck and call you have all the hammer you need
I was expecting something along the lines of revenge of the sith for the intervention and twilight corrupted by dark magic.
Fantastic brooding story of mind rape, abuse, and attempts of recovery.
Gotta feel for spike, torn between helping friends, doing the right thing, and living with A casual evil twi.
Ah yes, the thoughtlessly shoe-horned-into-the-show notion of a regular spell so powerful that it would even affect Discord... despite him being so powerful that the magic of 4 alicorns combined isn't enough to suppress him and the canonically-stated fact that only the EoH can do squat to him (you know, until Tirek and the equally plot-convenient and lazy anti-magic bug queen throne). And even if (as some people have done) you make the excuse that it could be accomplished with the magic of the EoH, there's STILL a poop-ton of problems: who could have designed it to use the EoH's magic, since the EoH were INERT STONE FOR A THOUSAND YEARS, and before that had solely been wielded by Celly and Loony... and if THEY had created the spell, why didn't they use it on Discord the FIRST FRIGGIN' TIME WHEN IT WOULD HAVE MADE THE MOST SENSE... or have the Mane 6 use it on Discord immediately when Celly just randomly decided to let him run wild. And THEN to take an even bigger dump all over the concept, we now have the EoH and Tree being sapient things, so would they even permit themselves to be used in such a manner?
That spell.
I dislike that entire notion for every possible reason which could relate to it: thematically, ethically, morally, canonically... it's just wrong in every imaginable way.
It was yet another indication the show writing had nose-dived.
10047487 See my longer comment. That was near the top of a long list of 'Ways the Show Writing FAILED in Later Seasons of MLP: FiM'.
It makes no sense at all. Oh, forgot one thing. Twilight got all uppity about Starlight brainwashing ponies with her Cutie Mark Mindrape Spell, but then was considering using an even BIGGER mind-rape spell on Discord.
This is what happens to a show when you hire hacks.
10047472 Eh, just snipe Twilight from a distance. Use an iron bullet since iron is immune to evil fae pony majicks.
She'll never see it coming.
10047408 It made me livid as well, but not for 'in-world' reasons. I, of course, being a supreme being, know that these ponies and things are just words on a page. Nothing happened to anyone, because none of them exist.
My ire is directed at the show's writers for being so lazy and sloppy and have such a piss-poor grasp of the world and characters they were writing for that they'd think the early-season Twilight would ever even consider using such a spell, AND that it would even have any effect on Discord, AND that such a spell would even exist in the first place... as it would kinda-sorta already have been used a whole lot by whoever made it and none of the big bads from the past would keep showing up.
The Sisters sure as hell would have used it on the utterly evil and unrepentant Sombra the instant they faced him! BLAMMO!! Crystal Empire is saved in 10 seconds flat!
It's an INCREDIBLY lazy bit of writing which undermines almost the entire canon history of the show! Kinda like using that light speed kamikaze maneuver in "The Last Jedi".
Why do so many 'professional' film and TV writers apparently lack even basic abilities to maintain their own fictional continuity? (I'm gonna guess it's because they're actually pretty dumb)
Tis is a quite sad and bucked up story.
Twilight did nothing wrong
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The spell, as portrayed in this story, seems more like something Sombra was responsible for creating in the first place.
10048385 Uhm… why would Sombra make a 'reformation spell'... and how would they have known about it, considering Sombra took over, basically isolated the Crystal Empire, then was attacked and made it disappear shortly thereafter. At what point would this spell's instruction have been broadcast?
Also, how could Sombra, who is weaker than the Alicorn Sisters (except in the comics when he suddenly gains the ability to petrify them... which is actually irrelevant since comic Umbra Sombra isn't the show canon's plain old Dark Magic-using evil unicorn Sombra) and MUCH weaker than Discord, have managed to create a spell which could affect him? Heck, if it's a SOMBRA spell... why on earth would the ponies even think of using it, given the limited experience Twilight has had with Dark Magic suggests that it has severely corrupting effects on the user and highly deleterious effects on the mentality of the target as well?
This just makes them even MORE stupid for using it. It's too big an Idiot Ball to balance!
Okay, this is great and I adore it! I always wished that the reformations spell was explored more often in the MLP fandom (as far as I know, only Strife of Discord and Terrible Doctor Twilight ever touch the subject). It's super cool and totally messed up, skimming the line between good and evil. On one hand, it essentially makes a villain a tool used for the betterment of society. But on the other hand, it makes a sapient creature a tool. Does someone have the right to choose to do evil? Of course, yes they do. However, I can see how Twilight could fall into the trap of "the ends justify the means".
And Fluttershy! Can I say that I love how you write her? She is so patient and tries so hard
This fic is a blessing
So, I love this as a one shot tragedy. It's interesting and sad, and the ending is tastefully bittersweet. That being said however, I must join the other commenters in a desperate plea for a sequel! Or several sequels! Or a entire series of sequels! This story has SO MUCH POTENTIAL
I would love to see the other girls interacting with Discord! How would they try to help Discord? I would love to see their own personal twists on trying to help him because man, I live for unique character interactions! And what about Twilight? I wonder if she feels any guilt for her actions; would she be willing to attempt to create a counter spell, or would she still firmly stick to her beliefs? How would Discord, as his personality slowly begins returning, react to the girls' attempts to help him?
And Discord! If he does recover, what then? I'm sure he'd be livid with Twilight; as a spirit of chaos, his anatomy is likely of peak importance to him. Would he be okay with Twilight's sentence or would he want his own personal revenge? Would Fluttershy be able to stop him from taking drastic actions, and more importantly, would she want to?
And now I'm imagining a moment where Discord has mostly returned to himself and is absolutely horrified and furious with what's happened. He teleports to Twilights cell, prepared to do some good ol' gloating before sending her to the moon or something, only to realize that he can't. He absolutely wants to, but enough of the spell still remains that he physically cannot do anything to harm Twilight.
Oh no, I'm starting to mentally write fanfiction for a fanfic!
I digress. I love this fic and, if you ever developed it past this oneshot, I would read the HECK out of it. No pressure though; a fic is only good if its author wants to write it.
10048414
It's clearly not actually a reformation spell. Discord is a mind-controlled slave. That's the sort of thing Sombra was into.
...okay, seriously, what can I say that hasn't been said by somebody in a much better way than I could say it?
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I don't mean to be that guy who shoots down everyone else's ideas, but does this story really need a second part? I think it works a lot better this way. There are some things that, once you've said or done them, you can never take back.
10048623
It doesn’t need a second part. It might even work better with only one. But it might be better with a part two. Can’t tell unless that second part actually exists.
10048643
*shrugs* True.
10048623
You're absolutely right. This story is great and making a sequel in which Discord recovers would somewhat take away from the bittersweet ending. Nonetheless, there is simply so much potential in this story that I think a sequel would add more than it would take away.
Yes, a hopeful sequel would change the bittersweet nature of this a bit, but it could add so much character development! I imagine that
Discord's recovery through this would be an amazing read about and a terrifying thing to experience. Discord is such a free spirited characters; having his will ripped away from him would be a humbling and traumatizing experience.
Imagine how terrifying it would be to struggle against such a spell, trying to cling onto some semblance of the free will you once took for granted, only to be pulled down under in to murkey passivity. Yes, a sequel would likely free Discord from the spell, but he wouldn't get out of it without serious mental scars.And who knows? Maybe he'll never fully recover until Twilight passes. Maybe he'll always have to live with a constant ache in his bones and the burning desire to follow any order given.
Not to mention the results of Twilight's actions on people besides Discord! How do the girls feel about their friend being jailed? How does Celestia feel about imprisoning yet another student? How does Spike feel? There could be so much fallout from this event!
A sequel would reopen a closed book and add to a full story, but I think that there's enough potential content here to justify it. A tragedy is one thing, but having to live through a tragedy and attempt to overcome it is another beast entirely.
(also, sorry about using your comment as an excuse to talk about this fic more. I'm going to be thinking about this story for the next several days, and someone needs to suffer through my ramblings.)
see what happens when you try to PLAY. GOD
What a powerful piece. What an original piece! Truly, I can see why it made it to the featured page. You put a lot of thought into this and it shows. And oh, oh, how it hurts. It really, really HURTS. I hate what happened to Discord. I hate that Twilight is like this. My theory is that somehow, the spell did something to her, too. Because she turned into somepony that she had never been before, even before having friends.
Fluttershy was written beautifully here. You really showed just what a symbol of kindness she is. And I love how it contradicts the idea that Celestia just wanted him for a tool and Fluttershy just reformed him because she asked him to.
So dark, but beautifully written and so thoughtful. Amazing job.
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Oh my gosh. Thank you all so much for reading. I'm really glad so many people enjoyed this!
As for a second part: right now, I have a few ideas (especially some good ones suggested by some of you!), but no cohesive story. If I can figure out a story, I might add onto this. But it will take awhile (just see how long it took for me to add a second part to Tangled Red String).
But really, I don't know how I can thank all of you, except to just say...thank you! To everyone who read and enjoyed!
This is such a captivating tale. A wonderfully dark twist on the canon timeline, and an intriguing "What If?" proposition. Would Twilight actually go to these lengths if the option were open to her, and she thought it was what Celestia wanted? It's hard to say, but not out of the realm of possibility.
Since the spell is tied to Twilight's own continuity of life, and since Twilight is looking to be imprisoned for the next eternity, it's not hard to imagine an even darker sequel where after tens or hundreds of years have passed, Twilight begs Celestia for death, in order that she and Discord might both be set free. Lots of seeds of dark possibility from this one.
Holly shit this was intense!!!
I absolutely loved it 🤩🤩
I always wished for another detailed perspective on the 'reformation Spell' Twilight mentioned.
I only ever saw one other fic dealing with it but that was very short and without any more conclusion besides that its a horrible brainwash spell that basically killes the personality and emotion of whoever is hit by the spell.
So damn good !!!
Keep it up and i'd definetly be up for a sequel 😁
Best Regards,
Chris aka. Nerfy
What a ride that was, I mean crap I knew the reforming spell idea was sketchy from the start but to see it in play out this way....
I wouldn't mind seeing a continuation of this either. Or for someone to do a parody continuation, based on my other thoughts on it.
Honestly, am I the only one who thinks Twilight was punished far more harshly than she should have been? Don't get me wrong, mind control is super bad. She deserved at least some punishment, her title being stripped for example was a good start. But lets consider other characters and the way they get punished for what they do; Discord himself, comes back and takes over equestria, breaks all the natural laws for an entire town, and also screws with the minds of at least half the population. His punishment, maybe another year in stone (which is probably less harsh than prison, unless you're aware while petrified) after which he's freed and offered redemption under friendship and maaaybe some form of parole by the princesses. Compare this to twilight using her mind control on ONE person, the individual who was literally just proclaiming he'd won and could now start that chaos again, getting 20 to forever in jail with no hope of parole unless someone else fixed discord. I mean, what? Chrysalis, offered friendship and all charges dropped after invading equestria twice, and kidnapping many many ponies each time... if she'd taken starlight's hoof, she'd probably have gotten no real punishment. Starlight herself, stripped the cutie-marks from a village and used literal brainwashing on ponies, also pardoned here for saving equestria once (and in canon after worse crimes because twilight offered). Twilight, saved equestria multiple times, including using discord to do it at least once here... and 20 years prison again. I just... it feels too harsh even given everything she did here? Maybe not for us humans, but definitely for the ponies of equestria?
But yeah, great story! All the feels, excellent writing, just that one thing about it that wouldn't leave my brain until I posted it here.
10049996
It's not just the use of the spell. It's the degradation of another living being like that to a slave or worse. And she most likely lied by omission to Celestia. Then when caught doing something wrong tried to escape.
10049996
There's definitely an argument to be made. However, considering Equestria's ideas on friendship and morality and whatnot, I think there's one factor we're not considering: Twilight's position and time.
For simplicity's sake, lets just focus on Twi and Discord. Discord definitely did terrible things during his time, things arguable worse that Twilight's actions. What Discord did however wasn't permanent. His corruption was easily removed and, upon his defeat, all the chaos disappeared. Twilight's act however, remained for at least a year and could continue for centuries. Though her actions affect fewer beings, they are more horrific. Imagine if Discord's corruption was permanent!
I think the biggest factor in Twilight's punishment is betrayal. Discord didn't betray anyone; he was evil and seemingly ignorant to the idea of making friends. Thus, when he acted out, nobody was betrayed. Twilight however, had the complete and total trust of Equestria's rulers. She knows of friendship and the morality of Equestria, and yet she decided to remove a creature's free will, treat him like a slave, and lie about her attempts to restore him. It's like a known criminal committing a crime vs a powerful and beloved politician committing a crime. One crime will cause a greater outrage.
Twilight betrayed her position, her morality, and the trust of Celestia. And when confronted with these facts, what did she do? She didn't repent like Luna or Starlight. If she had, there's a chance that she'd gotten a much lighter sentence. Instead, she tried to use Discord as a scapegoat and run.
That all being said, I don't think a shorter sentence would've been ridiculous. The extra 20 years may be a bit overkill. Given the goodwill Twilight harbored before this event, plus Equestria's preference towards reformation, it's possible that Twilight could lighten her sentence through showing remorse or attempting to cure Discord.
10047058
Relying on how OP Starlight is is kinda lame? Especially since they don't KNOW how OP she is.
10050067
However.. The problem is that the removal of his corruption and chaos and such came about through the Elements of Harmony. If Discord had his way, the Chaos would've continued long after he was gone. It was not in any way something that came about because of his free will or something easier.
It is something to consider that without outside assistance the Elements of Harmony would've had him contained for all of eternity as a stone statue as well.
Another issue is of course that the Element of Harmony is still with Twilight too given we haven't seen any disconnections or anything as far as we can tell. So while Celestia is outraged.. Is the Tree of Harmony?
A hauntingly bleak AU. I prefer happy endings, but sometimes things get too broken.
Of course, it takes a lot to bring things to such a point, from Twilight's initial lie and later doubling down on it, to her friends reluctance to confront her to her face about it.