• Member Since 21st Feb, 2018
  • offline last seen 10 hours ago

Redhairsaiyan


hair that is red and a saiyan :p

T

Cadence had always wished she could have a child of her own...

One night she finds a human child injured crying and alone in the woods and decides to take him in.

Chapters (2)
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Comments ( 36 )

You have spark my curiosity

Firstly, there's some definite typos in the chapter, as well as name's not being capitalized. Secondly, Your use of ellipses needs toning down, a lot.

But, there's potential. I'll keep it to my 'read' later to keep an eye on it.

I wouldn't mind some interactions with cadence and shining armor before she found to be named kid

9952504
Thank you for the feed back. I'll try to hold back on the ellipses next time.

9952522
you will see what i have planned in the future of this story.

just please be patient.

She is in in a forest near poniville, so she is either staying at twilight's castle, or Canterlot, you should mention that, so shining an cadance had a fight in Canterlot, don't think it was the crystal empire.

9953032
I mean I already kind of explained that when I had her mention about a meeting she was attending in the morning I thought that would be a clear giveaway that she was staying in Canterlot.

The way I explained it that way is for reasons that I couldn't say in this chapter without spoiling too much.

Cute i Love stories like this.

9953467
Thx!

I've got some plans in store for later on that I'm sure you'll love too! ^^

Interesting. Its a nice amount of buildup to see what might happen. Kinda odd that Shining has more power despite Cadence being a princess and outranking him in the social structure, but being an AU gives plenty of liberties to write out certain social limitations. That or Shining just has more influence that puts him beyond the bounds of his rank.

Well the concepts of a HiE and RoyalAdoptHuman have been done a lot, I think this fic has some potential...

Also, I would recommend you find an editor/proof reader for your chapters (I see few typos and non capitalized names)...

9954278
I've fixed most of the capitalization issues with the names though I may have missed a few and the typos I'll fix eventually because currently my focus is on chapter 2 right now and making sure it's perfect without the typos.

But I'm glad you enjoyed this so far it's just something i decided to do randomly yesterday.

This whole story was typed up on my phone too so please excuse any more typos

I loved this story so much, it shows how cadence can be a good mother, hopefully soon part 2

9954749
I am working on chapter 2 dont worry! ^^

I'm just going at my own pace right now so progress is kinda slow.

More hugz and kizzes Huzzah!

9958513
You'll just have to wait and see! ^^

What if shiny cheats on Cadence

Good, but some errors here and there... also, why is most of your text in Italics? (I would just keep the inner thoughts Italics)

9959104
could be possible but you're going to have to wait and see ^^

9959128
It's just how I wanted to write it.

Leon, you say....?

Ashley: LEON HELP!!!!!!!

Dead meme, but a great story you've got.

Better and better! Keep it up, I'm already waiting part 3

I love 'adopt a human's fics but why is Shining Armor an ass?!

9960728
hes depressed because their medieval culture demands children and yet they can't have any.

9959781
Thanks! ^^

Though I named him after someone else and not the leon on your thinking XD

9960728
because 1.

I really don't like him for some reason

And 2.

It'll make sense for plot later you'll see

9961792
That and I really don't like shining armor for some reason.

It's funny because I love the voice actor who plays as him as he played as a character in a movie that I watched when I was a kid but I don't like the character he's playing now. XD

Your writing is confusing, not the story. When it's >this< kind of writing, it usually use for flash back, thinking, or to passively a sorten thing.

Also, frage Shining Armor.

9966068
Sorry if that's a little confusing I wrote it like that because I wanted to and I'm too lazy to go back and change it

And what do you mean question shining armor?

was that a typo and you meant to say rage shining armor?

or is that germen?

Sorry, I'm saying frag, which replace the word with the f.

9966329
That's okay and yeah I want to frag him to

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