Friday, 6/29/18
“I’m gonna need some more sealer sometime soon. By the way, where are we going for lunch today?” Mike asked.
“Wherever. I don’t give a crap.” I dug through the pile of materials to find a bucket of pookie, then said, “Dusty, I forgot to tell you that we get an hour for lunch on Fridays. Usually we all go to the same place. Do you want to come with us?”
“I haven’t been here long enough to know what human restaurants are like,” Dusty answered from up in the lift. “I know you guys eat a lot of meat, is that what most restaurants serve?”
“So alien horses are still vegetarians, huh? And here I was starting to think that ponies weren’t all that different from us. You ready for the next piece of pipe?”
“Give me a minute; I’ve got to set this hanger.” She marked the correct height on the hanger strap, cut it, and fastened it in a loop. “Yeah, pass it up.”
I handed her ten feet of eight inch spiral pipe, which she slid through the loop and started to connect to the rest of the run.
“Most ponies are vegetarians, but a few of us eat some types of meat occasionally,” she explained. “A lot of pegasi will eat fish, crustaceans, and small birds because… Get. The hell. In there. Bitch!” She was having a bit of difficultly sliding the pipe onto the coupler.
“I could give you a hand with that if you need it,” I suggested in my most condescending tone. Mike laughed.
“Oh fuck off,” Dusty snapped as she hit the duct with her horseshoe, freeing it to slide into place. “Anyways, we eat those because flying requires lots of energy and protein and historically many pegasi have lived along coasts or in cloud cities over the sea so that was the most accessible food. Personally, I like the idea that pegasi have some eagle or griffon blood way back in the family tree.”
“There’s a Cajun place up on Sooner and they’ve got catfish and shrimp,” Mike said. “Otherwise she’s probably stuck with a Subway sandwich without meat.”
“I don’t feel like Subway anyways,” I replied. “Cajun it is.”
***
“Umm, Tree Branch? Is she okay?” Mike waved his hand in front of Dusty’s face while she sat, wide eyed and frozen in place.
I reached out and patted her on the cheek a few times to get her attention.
“Sweet Celestia,” she breathed, “is all human food this good? It’s hot and crispy and a bit spicy and mmmmm…” Words turned to an almost sexual moan of pleasure and her eyes closed halfway as she stuffed a hush puppy into her mouth.
"No, only the unhealthy stuff is this good." My own catfish basket was proof that humans were not designed to be fueled by leaves, tree bark, and rainbows. "Any food can be improved by breading and frying it. Don't they cook that way in Equestria?"
It took her a few seconds to swallow enough of her food to speak. "We have a plethora of sweets: cakes, pies, donuts, candy, and on and on. But most of our actual meals tend to be healthy and kinda bland. Don't get me wrong, I like a good daffodil sandwich or hayburger, but they're kinda boring. Really flavorful meals tend to be from cultures on the outer edges of Equestria. My favorites are sushi and Manipuri food."
"Manifoor foo?" Mike mumbled through his mouthful of po' boy.
"It's a type of food from a region off to the west. Lots of spicy curries," she explained before finishing her shrimp.
Mike swallowed, "Sounds kinda like Indian food. We've got some restaurants that may be similar and they always have lots of vegetarian options. Wanna go to one this weekend?"
I snorted. "Smooth, Mike."
"Shut up, jackass." He kicked my shin.
"Ow, you son of a bitch!" I laughed
Dusty interrupted our "fight" by throwing a fry at both of our faces. "Sounds good; I'll text you tomorrow. You guys ready to leave?"
"Yeah," I sighed as I stood up. "If we have to. You're riding in the bed of the truck though, Dusty."
"What, why?" she asked indignantly.
I raised my eyebrows. "Well, it might have something to do with you shooting your wings out and blocking my view when that car pulled out in front of us on the way here." We'd taken the job truck to lunch, so we'd been sitting three across on the bench seat with her in the middle at the time.
"It was instinct," she blushed. "I tried to slow myself down so I wouldn't hit the car."
"And that's why my instincts are telling me that it'd be safer for the mobile blindfold to sit in the back where she isn't as dangerous. Besides, there's more room there."
"Ok, that's fair." She flapped a couple times and dropped into the bed.
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I’m curious if they left the bigot out on purpose of if he usually doesn’t come along.
Ok, I'd have to say ponies sticking their head out the window or chilling in the pickup bed sounds a hell of a lot cuter than doggos. I do wonder if she'll hang on to one of those ubiquitous crossbeams found on construction vehicles and ride the slipstream from the back of the pickup? Heh.
As far as fried food goes, yeah, frying and/or bacon makes everything better.
p.s. Ponies gonna get faaaaaaat...
9985851
I don't know about that. Can't be worse than all the sweets they eat back home.
A nice raisen and pilau rice, sweet and sour will do a pegasi good?
9985849
I probably should've put that in, now that you mention it. Half the crew went to the BBQ joint.
Great chapter :D
I’m liking this and I’m loving all the references to home, I haven’t been back in 10 years!
Do construction workers really do that? I've never seen them do that. Then again, I don't live in a city.
Nice this saga continues! On to the date!
9985987
Hell, we even do that when the job we're on isn't in a city.
But for real though, yes we do. It's the same kind of teasing and joking that everyone does except constantly and with absolutely no filter.
One of my personal favorites is to have a yelling, cussing fake argument over something minor where an outside observer would think y'all're half a second from throwing punches.
While not an actual conversation I've had, it's close enough:
"Did I say you could borrow my hammer?!"
"I don't give a fuck if you did or not!"
"I don't want your nasty-ass hands on my shit! You've probably still got jizz on them from beating off dudes in the port-a-can at lunch!"
"Fuck you!"
"You wish, queer."
9986057
Loggers too!
9986057
Sounds exactly like Merchant Marine. We’ve got a lot of guys who used to do construction, too. Nobody understands our culture, or why we’re straight-up offensive to each other like all the time, lol.
This was really good. Enjoyed the banter and how well Dusty is fitting in. I hope the date goes well and the bigot doesn't bother her.
In a real life situation like this I do worry the poor ponies might accidentally poison them selves on our food.
Here’s hoping her magic helps protect her... cause god themself won’t be able to help her co workers. First time with greasy fried food gonna be one HECK of a tail wind.
Theoretically, she could get the tuna, though I've personally never trusted a meat served with an ice cream scoop.
In any case, that restaurant does sound amazing. You have me jealous of a little construction pegasus. Nice work. Looking forward to more.
9986057
Reminds me of the "witty banter" we had during 3rd shift at the grocery store, although a little more censored because 24hr stores were starting to become a thing. Although there wasn't any filter on the cleaning crew (contractors) who all seemed to be from South America, talking trash in another language (usually only one knew enough English to be understood).
Pretty sure it was because the crew was all men. Being union might have also had something to do with it too, heh.
Dusty on culinary adventures. I love it! Could read about this kind of stuff forever.
Hope we get to hear about that date soon. :)
9987079
Meh. It’s just a giant bag of Starkist and a whole bag of mayo.
9986077
That sounds a lot like my school actually, albeit a fair bit more crass.
(You tend to get really thick skin when you're all seniors, and you've known everyone since 6th grade, and it's an all boys school).
Damn I love this. The Humor really hits home.
I dont work on construction sites directly, more like a mid size industial company (steel works/foundry)
Arround 50-60 pople you see more or less often, and like 12 guys working maintainance like me, electricians and dumbfucks (or mechanics as they like to call themselves)
The way you talk to each other really gives you a "thick skin" as we say in german. Dont take things to serious, have a laugh instead.
I dropped a glass bottle a couple of weeks ago and had to clean it, 2 days later on "nikolaus" (like a small pre christmas on 6th december) a coworker gifted me a spill and drop safe baby bottle. In the evening I had to drink my eggnog out of it.
Other times we leave valves just a tad bit open so the guy on the end gets drenched or even set each other on fire with brake cleaner (controlled, might lose a bit of arm or calf hair tho)
And no language filter whatsoever.
like I met a guy in class during the aprenticeship who was gay:
"I might get fucked in the ass but thats the gayest shit ive ever seen, fucking fags"
and so on...
I like this story. Looking forward towards more.
Just finished re-reading this story. I really hope you find the motivation and idea for another chapter