• Member Since 30th Oct, 2019
  • offline last seen 5 hours ago

Symphony_in_152mm


Howdy, I'm just a buggo with a severe lack of self-confidence! (Don't proofread in my comment section, please.)

T

Formerly known as: "Unexpected Adventures in the Life of a Changeling"

Zach was an average guy with an average, boring life. He went to work, paid his bills, and partook in what escapism he could get from videogames.

When he wished he could get something more out of life besides videogames and dead end part-time work, he didn't mean being transported to a world based on an old cartoon show that he was a fan of five years ago.

He especially didn't mean being turned into a ravenous, emotion eating, horse-shaped, insectoid.

Now he has to figure out how to live life as a Changeling and navigate an Equestria that doesn't seem to follow along with everything he remembered from the show. If he's lucky, maybe he can find a way back home, or at the very least, figure out how to "bug-pony"

Chapters (7)
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Comments ( 236 )

Phase Two? Such a cliche thing for a mastermind to say. It's been done so often, you can find it in speech therapy 101.
Still, please continue. I'm surprisingly enjoying it.

Tbh, it feels like a self insert for me lol.

... This looks fun, as someone who stopped watching MLP since Luna fought and defeated the Tantabus, I wonder what his reactions will be once he finds out about what the series holds after the wedding...

9932702
he's less "mastermind" and more, "I'm probably going crazy so I need something concrete to focus on to avoid diving further into insanity."

I'm glad you're enjoying it though, this story is proving to be very fun to write!

9932872

It's proving to be quite fun to write.
I myself stopped watching shortly before the Sombra incident, though I stuck around for the fan created content and occasionally watched a few episodes here and there.

Comment posted by ShadowHell deleted Nov 16th, 2019
Comment posted by Symphony_in_152mm deleted Nov 11th, 2019
Comment posted by Symphony_in_152mm deleted Nov 16th, 2019
Comment posted by ShadowHell deleted Nov 16th, 2019
Comment posted by Symphony_in_152mm deleted Nov 16th, 2019

I see promise!

Hope you'll continue.

9966943
I appreciate the vote of confidence! I'm in a bit of a struggle IRL at the moment, but I'm nearly done with the next chapter. Several more are already planned out and simply need to be put to paper.

Finally got around to to read this story. So far, i think you are off on a good start, and seem to have a good grasp of humor. I think your worries of the ponies being in characters isn't to worry about in your case. I do like that this former Brony didn't see the whole series interesting and could bring about interesting ideas in who he could mess everything up for the show with his limited knowledge of what had happened in the 6 seasons later. I wonder what you will bring about having a HiE turned Changeling that will be different from other people who tried to do make it work?

Looking forward to see what you will come up with next then.


And also here is the link of my DA gallery for if you are looking for to commission a cover art:
https://www.deviantart.com/amalgamzaku

9976920
Thank you kindly, I appreciate the vote of confidence! I've been told I have a very dry sense of humor; I've looked at different ideas and concepts of humor, studied it a bit, enough to decide that I didn't want the story to be a "comedy" so much as have plenty of 'funny moments' in it.

I appreciate the reassurance in character, but characterization has always been a huge worry for me. If I don't keep the core elements of characters apparent, they start to feel like they aren't the characters they're supposed to be, at least from my perspective. Maybe I'm overthinking it, but its a thing I noticed in some of the later seasons of the show where the characters started feeling off and not themselves. Its also a significant thing I've seen in other fanfics where the author's portrayal of characters doesn't meet up with their canonical counterparts and they feel like they're someone else. IDK, maybe its just me.

As for the protagonist, he's very loosely based off of myself (as I mentioned in the author's notes). I intentionally made it so that his experience with the show more or less cuts off after season 2, without any of the major event knowledge that I myself have. I won't spoil anything, but your thought process is on the right track.

Again I don't want to spoil anything, but I also should say I don't usually read 'human in equestria' stories, so I can't speak on what I'd do differently compared to them in any semblance of good faith. I've got ideas, I have plans, and I have tree possible endings for the story planned out already.

Quick question.. did I just read a bit of cannibalism

9981439
well the show never explicitly states whether changelings are more bug or more pony, so...it is possible?

9981498
Unintentional cannibalism aside, good chapter๐Ÿ‘

9981502
Thanks! I appreciate the feedback.

Come to think of it, bugs eat each other all the time, so, is it really even cannibalism if other bugs are already eating bugs?

is it just a circulation of natural instinct?

9981518
I just pictured 2 changelings fighting to eat each other

Derp incoming!! :D

Glad you continued!

9981825
Yes, everyone's favorite side pony is coming! I'm hoping folks will like my interpretation of her character.

I had no intention of stopping, I was just discouraged was all, as I usually am, from the weight of it.
Submitting creative works is a hella stressful anxiety trip, ya know?

I am very interested in seeing which season or seasons this story takes place during.

9982583
naturally, you're a writer yourself. I'm probably preaching to the choir, right?

Can't tell you how many times I've had my work harshly criticized and poo'd on by folks who never wrote anything in their life.

9982109
I've given several big hints, but I've been careful not to say it outright just yet. Next chapter will help establish when this takes place.

9982635
Well from what I have read so far we seam to be sometime before the finally of season 2 but how close to it we will just have to wait and see when you post the next chapter.

9982632
So far most of the people who've poo'd on my works are people who 1) have never written anything, and 2) are known for being unnecessarily mean to others online with the excuse of "I'm just being honest" (a phrase that, frankly, makes me want to reinstate the death penalty just for people who pull that crap lmao).

9983040
I have to agree with you on your assessment of the folks that like to harshly criticize people's work.
the deleted comments from last chapter were from just such a person. Hadn't written a thing, harshly criticized me to the point of being considered vitriolic, then said "Oh I'm just offering my critique, how else are you going to grow?"

its the worst, makes me wonder what's going through these folks' minds when they do it.

Happy to find another HiE!Changeling story on here, and i hope to read more of this soon.

With that out of the way, let me assure you that your writing is far, far from the worst I've read, both in and out of stories such as the human turned into changeling (or even the more broad insert_creature_here) niche. Your exposition in the prologue set a nice pace to the story, neither too rushed nor too long winded, descriptive without going overboard. I particularly like your characters ability to suspend disbelief slowly being eroded, as i feel that that is one particular place many story tellers either rush past in an attempt to just get on with the actual meat of the story, or never quite manage to leave behind.

As for your concerns about canon vs. realism mentioned in your AN on chapter 3, frankly its always been something that I, personally, prefer leaning towards realism, if it fits in the context of the story (ie: lighthearted, comedy or such vs. realism).

All told this is a great read so far, and i eagerly await more from you.

This is a very good story so far, and it seems like you have an idea where the story is going from here. That's a pitfall that's ended many a human to changeling fanfiction.

On a separate note, I might have a harder time than the Zach here at believing this was real at first. That's mainly because I frequently have dreams where I'm either Chrysalis or her daughter and they are incredibly realistic. I feel pain and hunger in them as well as tactile sensation and even the feeling of flying. They tend to be quite consistent and allow me to use magic powers to suck love out of all the things.

9990983
Oh yes, one of the main things for writing a story, the *core* thing, is having a solid beginning and ending.
For me, those are fairly easy, its the grinding out of the dialogue and filling in the sequences where I often start spinning my wheels. Its not so much that I don't know what to do, rather, I don't know which of the many dieas to choose from as being "the best option".

it'd be amazing if I could get a think tank or something, someone to help me sort through the ideas and hammer out things.
Also, thank you kindly for the compliments and feedback!

Dreaming has always been an odd thing for me. MY conscious self and subconscious are separated in the sense that I'm never "Me" in a dream, so much as I'm controlling an avatar with which to traverse any given dreamscape my subconscious has thought up. I never feel pain, I never feel hungry, so much as I have a mental process telling me my avatar is hungry, food always tastes terrible when I wake up and remember the flavors, despite how amazing its "supposed" to taste like in my dreams. They're never consistent either, I look away from something and BAM, I'm in an entirely different storyline and universe altogether. I've never had a "pony dream" so much as I've had dreams with a couple pony elements in them that were part of a bigger picture, or something else, or simply referenced. Its partly due to how spaztic my train of thought is, probably. Everything is relevant to something else, no matter how obscure or vague that relevance is.

9991000
Dreams are fascinating because no two people dream alike. I personally practice pluralism โ€” which is accidentally alliterative โ€” which makes my dreams more detailed, more often lucid, and much easier to remember.

Also, in terms of a think-tank style thing, I'd be willing to help out there from time to time. It would obviously be dependent on having free time between classes. I frequently do something similar with a friend of mine where, when I come up with a story idea, I'll share it to him and he often gives me ideas that are much better than what I had originally.

Last thing. I noticed that someone had said this felt like a self-insert. I think that may be interpreted as a really high compliment, since it means that your character feels real to someone, as if it's an actual person who exists.

9990905
Happy to provide one! You won't have to wait too much longer, I'm already about 4k into next chapter, I don't know what the consistent length of these chapters is going to be yet. Probably going to keep it somewhere comfortably between 5k and 8k words per chapter. Not short, but not too long.

My writing style has been a huge worry of mine. I've been developing it for years now, it's still got improvement to go, but I digress. I see a lot of stories that tend to rush into the meat of things, I'm glad someone else sees that too. My stories are intentionally more of a 'slow burn', I like to savor in the character interactions and gradually build up into the main focus of the story.

Zach's disbelief and having to come to terms in deciding if this is all real or not was one of the ideas I had the most difficulty with, especially in the first iteration of the story back when I was originally going to have his memory be a little fragmented or outright missing (Thank goodness I ditched that aspect, as it made zero sense in retrospect with what I had planned for the story.) I don't want him to just say "Welp, I'm in ponyworld now", He has a job, he has responsibilities, he doesn't necessarily *want* to be in Equestria at all. I had hoped to properly convey this through his thoughts and that steady erosion of his disbelief, it seems I did just that.

I've made the decision to take advantage of the "AU" aspect of the story and flex a bit more of my creative muscle. I'll be dropping hints here and there to help the reader get an idea of where I'm going with the story and how they can expect things to be different from here on out via foreshadowing.

I like having some realistic grounding in my fantasy, something that could be seen happening in real life if one were to remove some of the more obvious fantasy elements, though I don't plan to "explain the magic" as some fics like to do.
This fic is gonna try to keep a balance between "Reality" and the fact that it takes place in a magical land of saturated colors and magical ponies who celebrate the virtues of friendship, peace and harmony.

9991055
I don't know what pluralism is, but I tried to perform lucid dreaming for the longest time. I've had lucidity in my dreams before, but I eventually came to a comfortable medium where I was partly aware of being in a dream, though I wanted to allow my subconscious the opportunity to continue structuring the dreamscape and following along with their story. More often than not, they're convoluted messes that make zero sense in retrospect, but make perfect sens IN the dream.

I would definitely appreciate someone to bounce ideas off of and give tangible feedback for my story direction, so there's less tire spinning and more words to paper, so to speak. Every little bit helps.

Zach isn't me, so much as he's a character loosely based on me. I had hoped that his portrayal would be more relatable than myself, that being one of the three main reasons why I elected to avoid inserting myself into the story in the first place. The idea that someone felt that way, seeing themselves in this character, helped vindicate my decision to go with the characterization that I did. Its a good feeling knowing your protagonist is someone they can relate to.

I have to say, not a bad story so far. But I feel like his introspections get a bit wordy... It's been around 19,000 words it feels like he has moved fifty feet from his starting location... XD

At least thats what it feels like to me... As I said, wordy and not a lot of movement or actions, mostly mental ramblings... I'll keep reading though I"m sure it will get better... Though maybe, just maybe he will reach ponyville within the next five chapters... LOL jk...

Other then that you are doing well, the discriptions are good and I'm enjoying the story for the most part considering I'm only on chapter 3 and have atleast one more chapter to go... I'll read that one and see how everything turns out... and stick around for the next whenever it may come.

10028425
yeah his introspections are a bit wordy, I'm trying to trim those down.
That's one of his character flaws, he grossly overthinks things. Still, I admit that I got carried away with trying to convey what he was thinking.
Its a bad habit of mine.

My stories have a tendency to "spin their tires" in the first couple chapters, until I get the feel of the path I want it to take to reach its conclusion.
The pacing is a slow burn, but with the addition of another character, things will pick up. Less rambling and indecisiveness, more actually doing things.

10028503
:yay: yay! :pinkiehappy: Thats cool. I'm gonna try to go read chapter 4 lol. I still havent got around to it... if not tonight then tomorrow considering its already past midnight where I am... *Thumbs and hooves up* lol

10028543
things are definitely gonna be picking up in the chapter that follows.

for now, you should probably get some sleep.

10029373
glad you liked it!

I'm gonna be keeping a steady pace of "things actually happening" from here on out, with introspections being used significantly less.
Next stop: horsetown! Err- I mean, Ponyville!

The denial is strong with this one :coolphoto:

10037503
I mean, its the logical reaction for someone who wakes up to find themselves in a world that only existed in a children's cartoon show up until now.

Sorry for missing the last two updates I was distracted with class work. Now that Zack is finally getting of the Everfree forest now the real antics can start now. In my book Ponies can be blissfully gullible with disguises, but I could say the same for people in general if they are already too busy with their live. I do like your depiction of Derpy and how easy it is to abuse her with her condition even unintentionally. I think hiding his name from Derpy is pretty pointless and doesn't reciprocate the level of trust that she is giving, which shows how hypocritical he is by being lead by his fears and paranoia which in itself feeds the very reasons why ponies should be weary of him, even when fears of changeling are at a long time low, if now out right unknown. I think you did a good job on that of your writing, keep it up.

What he has more reasons to be afraid of are the changelings themselves just to silence him, being completely dominated by fear on the knowledge of their very existence which Chrysalis uses to maintain her power of her hive all the while they are desperate starving.

10043091
no worries my friend, there's no rush.

I really appreciate the feedback on the details I've put into the story so far, happy to see folks picking up on them!
Derpy was the main reason this chapter took so long. I went through some painstaking efforts to get my interpretation of her character just right, something I thought folks would like considering her many variants in the fanbase, but something that'd also fit the kind of character I wanted as a core protagonist alongside our main protagonist.

Zach is a hypocrite for sure, but there's underlying reasons behind what he does and why he does them. As the story progresses, I'll give hints and little dips into his backstory for folks to put the pieces together and figure him out.
He's paranoid, he overthinks and over analyzes things and he's a walking contradiction that's willing to trust someone with his safety, but not his name.

Most people dont write a prologue of sorts and just opt to just throw you into the story headfirst saying it's a self insert and it is very well done setting the stage already you say its fast paced and honestly its probably the best size it could be. You introduced us and now your going into the actual story afterwards.

10066979
why thank you!
Considering what the story was going to entail, I felt it was crucial that I give a prologue and setup for who this person was, and how they suddenly found themselves in the land of colorful friendship equines, rather than just do the cliche "wake up in equestria and scene!"

Very odd start... O Well... Here we go...

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