11 Truth revieled (Obsolet)
This Chapter has been rewritten and you can skip ahead if you want. However if you want to see exactly what I have changed, you can read it, but please keep in mind that nothing that happens here has any influence on the story.
A few hours had past since Princess Luna and that Pegasus mare, which I think was non other then her sister in disguise, had left. Now I am sitting in the backyard again, watching the stars, while waiting for the two most important Ponies in my life.
I may not like it, but Princess Luna was correct, when she said that telling them the truth could help me with my Nightmare problem. I thought about this for a while longer after she left and came to the conclusion, that it is better for them to learn now about it, in a way I can control, then let them find out by accident.
No matter how hard it will be for me, they deserve to know the truth. "Wingy where are you?" I hear mommy shouting, probably trying to find out, to where I vanished.
"In the backyard." I reply with the same loudness.
There is no sound in the night, expect from a owl. I just sit there watching the stars in silence, not hearing the hoof steps of the approaching ponies, which are so dear to my heart, that I almost jump in shock, when I feel somepony nuzzeling my neck. "Coming out here often?" Mommy wants to know from me, sitting down to my left, while momma D sits on my other side.
"Everytime after I woke up from a Nightmare. Sometimes I am alone, but more often I am not." I tell her honestly, not wanting to hold anything back anymore.
"You know that you can always come to us Wingy." She reminds me, but clearly unaware of something, I have to remind her on my own.
"I am not sure, if I want to walk into your room, when you two are having sex." Both mares gasp in shock about what I just said and while I watch into the distance I hear at least one hoof hitting the face of it's owner. "Don't worry, I didn't see anything, but the noises coming through the door were quite clear."
"Oh Okay." She replies not verry comfortable about what I just told her, before she continues with a sigh. "But that isn't why you wanted to talk with us Wingy, am I right?"
"Yes, Yes you are." I confirm her suspicion and after a deep breath I begin. "It is about where I am from, from before I ended up in the Castle of the two Ponysisters. It may sound ridiculous, impossible or like out of a bad fairytale, I can asure you that everything I tell you, is nothing then a true fact."
I look at each of these awesome poines for a moment, but I don't see there any doubt. Instead I get the feeling, that they know how hard this is for me and that they try to encourage me with their smiles. After another deep breath, I decide to begin by dropping the first of many bombshells, in this young night. "I haven't always been a Pony, in fact I am not even from this world. I don't know how I ended up here, nor do I care about this, but what I can tell you is what I was before I ended up in the Castle."
Again I look at each of them and shock is clearly written all over their faces, but that is the only reaction I get from them. I thought there would be more, but to be honest, I am glad that this isn't the case. "I used to be a human, I used to be male and I used to be in my early thirties, but all of that is gone now, which includes my old name."
"I will tell you a bit from my old life now, maybe this will help you to understand, why I have all those problems, I am facing everyday. If it doesn't, that would also be okay for me, but please just listen for now, since this isn't exactly easy for me."
"Wingy, you don't have to tell us all this." I hear mommy's soft voice to my right, trying to talk me out of this, when she realizes just how uncomfortable I am right now. It feels good to know that she doesn't want to force me through this, but I have to ignore that for now, since I don't think, that I will ever again gather enough courage to tell them about my past.
"In my early years doctors found out that I had a disease, which caused me to get into uncontrollable spasmic seizures. Cause of that, my parents where always scared and I grew up sheltered, without any real friends. The only social contacts I had outside of school, was with my relatives, which wasn't always easy. Only when I turned sixteen and started my first apprenticeship, I began to see more from the world then just my home or the school and that is when it began to really turn bad for me."
"It sounded so easy, when I heared that the first year, is almost entirly spend in a school and only in the second and third year, you actually have to work in a real factory. I thought of it as something good, as an easy start, but this illuison was shattered in only a few days. When I became aware that, even in the school I was before I started this, was so shaltered that I couldn't comprehend with the situation, I sudenly found myself in and within two weaks, I was the punching ball of my class."
I hear mommy gasp in shock when she hears this and I know that she wants to say something comforting to me, but since I can't have that now, I just continue as if there was no sound. "For me it was like when you would take an helpless, unsupecting kitten and throw her right into a pit with starving Timberwolves. I stoped the apprenticeship after this year. Not for the bullying that took place there, rather then for the two facts that I didn't pass first years exam and that I was unable to find a factory, that would be willing to give me a chance, for my second year."
I take another break for a few moments, before I explain how I spend the next two years at a different school to get a higher eduction and how I slowly, but constandly turned towards hatred and bigotry. I tell them how I tried my luck as a cook, but that I didn't make it, because all the stress I was under became to much for me. Shortly after this my disease came back to me and after fifteen years without any problems, I had another spasmic fit.
From then on it is no problem for me anymore and the next few years are easy to describe with all the alcohol abuse, suicides attempts, and the hatred. With the passing of time, I realized that it was stupid to blame others for the bad things that happened to me and from one day to the next, I droped my bigotry and my hatred towards others and found a new focus: Myself!
Life itself didn't become better because of this, but I stopped to showing others my true emotins and kept them hidden, only to lay almost every night in my bed, crying myself to sleep, when I knew that I am the only one left awake. I tried to continue from then on, but for every obstacle I cleared in life, I had to face five new ones. Wouldn't it be for the music, from which I took strength, I don't know if I would have lived as long as I did.
I take one last deep breath, before I begin for the final time, since I began with this brief history lesson. "I don't know what exactly happen on this last day as human, but I know that I was waiting for a concert, when something close to me exploded and my entire vision was filed with fire. The last thing I saw were flames, before I woke up in the old Castle."
There is a long silence untill mommy asks me something I didn't expect. "Why? Why did you tell us all this Wingy?"
"Because I am scared."
"What are you scared of?" She asks me, digging deeper to the core of my Nightmares.
"I am scared how you would react, if you found out from other ponies, about what I used to be and how you would react towards this news. I am scared that you think of me as some kind of monster and just throw me away like a used napkin and I am scared that you would take more ultimate actions, to get ride of me." Tears begin to flow down out of my eyes, the more I admit what I am scared of and only when I feel a wing pulling me into a tight embrace, I realize that I am shivering in fear.
I don't know how long she holds me like this, but I know that it isn't long enough and all too soon the embrace ends and I find myself looking into the eyes of a currious mare. "What did you mean, when you said that you are afraid of us taking more ultimate actions?" She asks worried about what I could mean. I answer her question by lifting my right forehoof to my throat and make there a cuting gesture, making it clear that she understands what I mean.
Again both mares gasp in shock, before I find myself in another tight embrace. "I don't know what gave you this idea Wingy, but you should know the following: For me it is not important what you have been before, for me only matters what you are now."
"So you don't think of me as some kind of abnomination, that deserves to be send to Tartarus?" I ask her, slightly hopeing that I am right.
"Of course not. No matter what you have been before, you will always be my little filly." Hearing those words fills me with great relief for a moment, that is untill she ads a few more words. "But you still have some questions to answer."
"What do you want to know mommy?" I reply, hopeing that she doesn't ask thinks, I would prefare to leave alone.
"You mentioned earlier that you had another name, who changed it and why this name?" She asks me her first question and I sigh in relife, since this is something I have no problems with to answear.
"I changed it, shortly after I woke up in the Castle, hopeing that it would signalize a new start for me." I stop there, before I remember the second part of her question. "The name I choose is a reminder from what it became more and more with the passing of time in my life. Silent. And the one think I always dreamed to have, wings. That is why I chose this name."
"As good as your reason is, I am not sure that you chose a name, that is the most fitting for you."
"After all what you just told me, there is one thing that you didn't explain to me. Why do you try to avoid sunlight so much."
I know after all what I just explained, what I tell here now will sound silly compared to this. Maybe it is silly, maybe it doesn't really make sense, but that doesn't change the fact that it is true. "I am afraid of the sun."
"Since almost every bad thing that happened to me, happened in bright sunlight, it didn't took long for me to make a conection between those two. The more I avoided the sun, the better my life became. My fear of the sun grew so strong, that I sleept the days away in the basement and was only awake and willing to leave my home, when the moon was shining brightly. My fear for the sun grew to unimagined levels, when I saw a movie* in which the sun was so close to the planet, that it killed every life only from its heat."
She pulls me closer, holding me tightly, when she says. "Wingy, Princess Celestia would never use her control over the sun, to do such horrendous things."
"I know, but this doesn't help me with my fear." I reply, trying to sound as brave as possible, but these efforts are just a waste, since I can't restrain mysel from yawning at the end of the sentence.
Without any time to react she let go of me only those me on here back, before she begins to walk back into the house. "Now what do you think about getting some sleep? It is way past your bedtime missy." I hear her scolding me, I try to protest that she obviously has more questions, then I could possibly answear. But she is quick to shut me off with the words. "We can talk about that tomorrow." She lays me down on her bed and while she leaves me alone for a short time, I crawl under the cover, waiting for my mommy to join me.
At the next morning a confused Rainbow Dash wakes up in the middle of the backyard, wondering why she is out here and not snuggled close to her herdmate, when she remembers the events of the last evening. She realizes that she must have fallen asleep halfway through her daughters stories and isn't please with the idea to ask her herdmate, to explain what she missed. "That was more somnolent then a lecture from Twilight."
* The chronicles of Riddick, the scene in where the prisoners try to escape from the planet Krematory.
Honestly I just wanted to write a few words, to get an easy start for this Chapter and not the entire Chapter in one evening, but I just couldn't stop.
Now I just publish this and try to get soem sleep, shouldn't be to difficult since it's only 2:00 am. 
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"oh for fucks sake, rainbow dash" *facepalm*
that will have consequences
10024080
Yeah thats my bad.
I am not happy anymore with this Chapter and am currently thinking, if I should rewrite it.
10024258
maybe let her sleep on the couch for a while :D
10024321
That would be an option, but I think, my mistak in this Chapter is that, there is not enough conversation between those three and that a certain Stallion is nowhere to be found.
You're perfectly justified.
i.redd.it/8s79qcdd96yy.jpg
Uh, why why why?! Why does EVERYONE do that?! Turning a man into a mare when they come to Equestria?! It is SOOOO ANNOYING!!!!!!!
10910859
Probably because of the societal differences between earth and equestria (even though it probably isn't the actual reason for most) in equestria females run more supremely than the males do and its flipped on earth (even though were getting closer to being equal members of society) its still seen that way, thus would be my reason for the gender change and i hope it at-least quells the question no matter how any actually think this way is unknown but its a nice way to think without questioning a story and not enjoying it for what it is
(Sorry my punctuation is bad I’ve had issues with them for a long long time and I’m in college )