Dear God Emperor Goldner,
Something terrible has happened. You see, we were going exploring and we managed to go through a portal and wound up in Equestria again. The thing is, the portal wound up losing all of its energy and now we can't go back home. Even worse, that means that we are now orphans. Now we are not sure where to go but do you know if Starlight Glimmer still lives in Ponyville? If so we are wondering if she would adopt us? Please get back to us, we would love to be her stepdaughters.
Sincerely,
Toolaroola and Coconut Cream
To the G3 Ponies that annoy me,
Look, I am no longer involved with this generation of My Little Pony. However, I do know that Starlight has become something much bigger thanks to the new big brass, she and Twilight Sparkle live in Canterlot and are ruling the roost in Equestria now. Unfortunately I don't rule the roost anymore so I suppose I can't stop you from writing her so go ahead and write her. Don't be surprised though if Twilight isn't thrilled because of the desserts you threw on her one time.
Brian Goldner, CEO of Hasbro, Inc.
Dear Starlight Glimmer,
It is Toolaroola and Coconut Cream. We have some rather interesting news. You see, the two of us were doing some exploring and we went through that portal again but the thing is, it has now disappeared and we are homeless and no longer have any parents. We talked to who is now the former big brass and since he is no longer in charge, he said he couldn't stop you from adopting us!
He also told us something about Twilight being upset if you did but we know more about you two than most ponies would think. We know you two are close and she wouldn't stop you because she loves you. Please let us know if you'll adopt us so we can come up to Canterlot and begin new lives.
Hoping You'll Adopt Us,
Toolaroola and Coconut Cream
Dear Toolaroola and Coconut Cream,
We have talked and we have decided to adopt you. In the event you are wondering why I am saying we, you see Twilight is my sister and we are very close, closer than any other pair of sisters ever. Also, we have infinite powers so we can do anything we please. So come on up to Canterlot and not only will we adopt you but we'll turn you into Alicorns and make you princesses.
Ready to Adopt You,
Starlight Glimmer and Twilight Sparkle
ONE WEEK LATER
To Brian Goldner,
Guess what asshole, we were adopted by Starlight and Twilight! Yep, despite you not allowing it back in season seven and claiming we'd never get adopted, we did! Want to know something else you jackass? They turned us into Alicorns and gave us powers greater than their mother had and are teaching us even more! Even better, we are now princesses and have been promised that once we get older, we'll get to take over Twilight's old castle and make some bitch named Luster Dawn our subordinate! Isn't that sweet? Anyway, we'd say more but our step-mothers are throwing us a lavish feast and we don't want to be late.
Equestria's Newest Princesses,
Toolaroola and Coconut Cream
To the Arrogant New Princesses,
What the hell? You mean to tell me that not only were you adopted but you were turned into Alicorns and made princesses? I know why the hell this happened. The new big brass did this to spite me. In fact, he has done a lot to spite me solely because his waifu never became an Alicorn princess in the show. Oh well, this isn't any skin off of my ass. Now I do want to ask you of one thing, once you two are deemed old enough to take over Twilight's old castle, make Luster Dawn's life miserable. I don't like her any more than Twilight does.
Upset you Became Alicorns,
Brian Goldner, CEO of Hasbro, Inc.
Dear Princess Starbutt...
10121561
Dear Shadow Star,
You do know I'm a Goddess-Queen, right?
Goddess-Queen Starlight Glimmer
It's becoming an Alicorn bargain sale!
Points for anyone that got that reference.
Well their attitude did a 180…
10121601
Who, Toolaroola and Coconut Cream or the Goddess-Queens.
10121588
Hey, I'm not turning everypony into Alicorns!
10121631
Toolaroola and Coconut Cream.
The Goddess-Queens don’t really have a reason to be aggressive towards the two kids, so I could understand them doing something like that just because they can and not having a problem with it.
10121673
Oh those two aren't going to go doing anything like that. With them being princesses now AND being Twilight and Starlight's step-daughters, they will get a lot more perks. Twilight isn't going to break the news to Luster for a while, she wants her to be surprised when those two go in, throw her out of the master bedroom and make her sleep in a supply closet.
10121682
Oh man, I can just imagine one of them (Twilight included) telling Luster “Go cry to the Spa twins” when Luster inevitably bitches about it.
10121696
Are you a psychic or something? That was actually in my plans for once I decide to have that happen.