- Member Since 15th Sep, 2017
- offline last seen March 10th
Horse Girls Are Watching
I write about cute horses doing cute things. Also known as Ephemeral on /mlp/
Horse Girls Are Watching
Joined 15th Sep, 2017 ·
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That was intensely fascinating. Really well done! I'd love more chapters of this relationship.
Not sure why you used the dark or sad themes though, given that the story specifies there's no harm done and it doesn't leave off on a tragic point(unless the point is that Anon is abusive, which is arguable).
Write more you lazy piece of shit <3 im always a slut for pets
First to come first to go pretty good story
But I do feel bad for Moonlight Charm though
9928107
she is technically a Sentient/former human being and Anon is treating her like a dog that’s pretty messed up if you think about it
9928125
Yeah, but the entire premise is about how they have become petlike creatures. It seems like a natural development, depending on how much time has passed since the incident.
9928107
Truthfully, I want the reader to make their own conclusion and decide how they feel about it. Some people will wish they were Moonlight Charm, others will say Anon is a monster. I like that it's a kind of Rorschach test for readers and it makes the comments/discussions fun to read for me. Tags really ruin the idea of a subjective story, but if I don't put them, there's going to be rage mobs in the comments.
At the very least, I think should have the sad and dark tags, just as a warning going in. Whether it's deserved after reading is up to interpretation.
9928113
derpicdn.net/img/view/2015/9/22/985319.png
<3 you, and definitely maybe
I'm of the opinion that Anon should be punished for doing that to an innocent pony. I would never have done that to any pony, in fact, I probably couldn't even punish them lightly.
But that's just me. My weakness is small furry animals.
It's weird. It was a good read, but I still feel the need to dislike it... Guess I just don't agree with the portrayal that Anon's sadistic streak is justified in the eyes of Charmy.
... oh ...
That's nothing compared to what I go through for a living
9928113
Stories about pet pones are literally the best~
9928127
Yeah I guess you’re right but like You shouldn’t even treat animals like that his supposed to be taken care of her not throwing her in the rain when she does something he doesn’t like.
As someone who has a pet I guess I don’t feel very comfortable in the fact that some treats there is like that you know.
Wow, it was fucked up.
9928236
Hiiiiiiii Tavros!
More, I WANT MOOOOOOORE
9928615
YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Very well executed. Your unusual ingredients of Dark, Sad, Happy (to a certain degree) and even lewd is well thought out. Made me feel mixed emotions while reading it, and finishing it made me start to infer and think "what if." Personally this feels like a story that doesn't need a sequel, or if you do, maby short storys. And going through the comment section is fun, people discussing what they think on or take away from it, very interesting. Keep up the good work
9928637
Yes, me. Hello Tavros. How have you 8een?
I didn't like this. Not one bit. But I don't need to like it, to think it's well-written, or for it to provoke an emotional response. I'd love to have been in that bioweapon attack, yeah, but... what her master did was emotional abuse, plain and simple. This definitely lives up to its tags.
9928703
Explain why you keep downvoting everything I try to do?!!! >:/
9928777
9928703
Do this in PMs if you're going to have a spat about something not related to the story.
9928799
Not speaking to Olivia "says she has gone through more transformations than me without writing about them" the Magnus >:/
9928799
My apologies. Tavros can be a bit of a strange one.
9928826
STOP CALLING ME TAVROS!
When gentle punishment doesn't work, ramp it up.
9928166
You're definitely the gentle soul type.
That's good.
I'm not as much into the small (I love dogs, horses, cows) but I can sympathize completely. Animals are for protecc.
9928173
Your vote is for you. Use it how you please.
Good. You not necessarily meant to.
9928206
The combination of your name, comment, and your avatar felt so fitting that it gave me a laugh.
9928668
9928751
These are the kind of comments that make me really happy to read, because they show me the story worked as intended. Thanks for giving your feedback.
This was very well written. As someone who highly values individuality and personal agency, you've basically envisioned my personal hell.
9928107
This would be abusive for a pet, too. Definitely deserves the dark tag.
So, yeah. Anon is kind of an abusive ass who thinks that someone forgetting about their chores should be punished with being stuck out in the rain, by themselves, for an entire night with nothing to protect them from the elements. If I knew anyone who did this to their pets, then I'd straight bitch-slap them to another dimension.
Regardless, something that I'd been wondering about is the story title. "Should have known better." At first I thought that it was about Charmy, since she should know better than to take Anon's abuse lying down, but it was made clear in the story that she thinks the world of him, so it can't be that. Honestly, I don't know.
Author, any thoughts?
9928922
You're welcome! It does work that way sometimes.
9929194
I'm normally against giving my thoughts on my own work, as it taints feedback, but if you're going to ask directly, I guess I can. It'll just be spoilered.
It's not anything deep. The title is just to give it a title based on something in the story. I've found it easy to agonize over coming up with a perfect title so nowadays I just pick something to avoid that.
There's truthfully more meaning in the chapter title
Yeah, that's how I see it honestly. To me, it's a horror story and a tragedy of sorts. Abuse often takes forms like this—Victims protect themselves by saying it's not a problem or that it's all done out of love and the problem is with themselves. Charmy is put in a situation by her guardian that most readers will find distressing to read, but she still blames herself, she still says she's sorry, and she wants more than anything to be a good and regain Anons affection. So the cycle continues. Again, to me it's a horror. Charmy doesn't deserve any of that.
But despite Charmy's abuse, a lot of people will see the affection she gets and will envy her. It's something I've seen in the pony tf circles more than a few times. There are people so vulnerable, depressed and lonely, that they'd accept being left out in the rain, maybe even think they deserve it. Especially if it meant being loved.
That, I think, is why I wanted to write this. Charmy is a broken mare. And there's a lot of real people just like her.
Holy shit, is honestly all I have as a comment to this.
Honestly, well done dude. This was really well written.
9928843
TH3 BOY SKYL4RK G3TS SO FUSSY WH3N PROVOK3D, YOU B3TT3R B3 C4R3FUL M1SS BOSSY F4NGS 1 C4N SM3LL H1S CHOCOL4T3Y SYRUP ST4RT1NG TO BO1L
9929904
Uh.......
9928843
Dude, grow up.
9928615
You too.
I legit swear I heard this kind of conversation a long ass time ago at a middle school. How freaking old are you two? Fourteen?
9930251
:P
Just dealing with old beef with Olivia :P
9930251
They're probably two accounts by the same person.
9931135
The sad part, is that I know that they aren't. They're minors having a spat.
9931218
I'd be careful about saying that in public. If you know they're minors, they're on an M story, and you don't report them, you might be in violation of the TOS.
9931290
Well, that's up to the staff if they notice anyone having reported them in the past or not.
This is ten shades of fucked-up. Well written, HGAW.
9929685
Thank you. I'm glad you appreciated it.
9931734
i.gyazo.com/9e30e945b7421c628a27b37d34f85eec.png
Ye
9928972
We may be on opposite sides (and I haven't read this story yet), but if that's up your alley I have a few stories in that direction. In particular...
- MLP: FiM
- Drama
- Horror
- Tragedy
Twilight and Starlight learn about Thorax's new plan: spreading friendship across Equestria by transforming everypony into changelings.I have no idea what TF/TG meant, but I do know that this definitely deserved that dark tag. I do like how it was executed. At first, you can't really see much wrong, but then you see how Charmy has become accustomed to facing the consequences of Anon's sadistic side. Yet, she's still "one of the lucky ones" in her eyes. She's essentially in an emotionally-abusive relationship of sorts.
9934272
Haven't read the story, still debating. But TF/TG usually means Trans-Female/Trans-Gender.
Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh......
MORE
I hated every word from the turning point, onward yet I couldn't stop reading. Well done, I suppose.
I'm not sure I'm too comfortable with the idea of Google knowing me THAT well.
Hah. And now the sky weeps with you, little pony.
What a sadistic prick. I don't know how that pony tollerates a guy willing to do that for such a slight infringement.