Hail!
“Hey, Skellinor!” chirped Pinkie Pie. “How are you enjoying your first Nightmare Night?”
The pony skeleton smiled a toothy smile, which came naturally to her as she had no lips to speak of (or with), and replied; “It’s going great! Nopony’s running away from me screaming in fright, so that’s nice.”
Pinkie rolled her eyes and waved a hoof, “Pfft! Ponyville eats weird for breakfast. You’d fit right in, even after the spooky fun is over!”
“That’s what my creator keeps telling me,” Skellinor remarked as she brushed flat a tediously frizzy part of her floofy blue mane. Her glowing green eyes flared with excitement as she asked, “What do you think of my costume? I made it myself.”
Pinkie tilted her head as she walked around Ponyville’s latest resident. “I like the red cape and neck-fur. If Sombra wasn’t a pile of charcoal dust, he’d approve. The silver crown looks cool. Really brings out the spectral glow of your eyes.” She squinted at Skellinor’s neck. “I’m not so sure that Grogar’s bewitching bell doesn’t clash with the rest of your outfit, though.”
“Discord insisted I wear it. He told me it complements the red of my cape and my white bones.” She shrugged, making her shoulder bones rattle like plates. “It definitely caused a stir when my costume photos hit the fashion magazines.”
Pinkie pointed at the tattered book tucked deep in her ribcage. “I’ve seen your other costume designs in your drawing pad. I bet you could give Rarity a run for her money if you can make up more outfits like this one. Are you supposed to be the queen of the underworld?”
Skellinor struck what she hoped was a dramatic pose and dramatically declared, “I’m Princess Skellinor, ruler of Equus Mortistropolis, the pony city of the dead!” Waggling her hooves, she groaned, Ooglie-ooglie-ooh!”
“Hey, whatever floats your pontoon! I’m going to slip into my giant balloon costume. Time to play Chaos Pinkie!”
As Pinkie poinged cheerfully away, Applejack trotted over. Tipping her aluminum funnel hat, which topped off her metal lumberjack costume, she asked, “How ya doin’? You get a place to stay in Ponyville, yet?”
“Well, I’m renting a house outside town. I’m getting steady work, too.”
Applejack grinned and patted Skellinor on the shoulder. “That’s real good news! Have you seen Discord lately?”
Standing on her hind legs, Skellinor looked around. “I thought I saw him earlier, but now I don’t have a clue where he is.”
“Well, he has a knack for poppin’ up when he’s the last one you wanna see. No offense!” Applejack quickly held up a conciliatory hoof.
Skellinor shrugged. “I know my creator’s a handful. His mind may travel around a lot of corners, but his love is straight forward. I see it when he’s around his fiancée, after all.”
“Walk and talk with me,” Applejack asked. “I’m curious about somethin’.”
As they walked past the haystack maze and dunking booths, the skeleton asked, “You’re wondering how long I’ve been around, right?”
“From what the magazines tell me, you’ve been a registered citizen for a few months. Thing is, Discord’s creations usually disappear in twenty minutes or less. Yet here we are, havin’ this little chat.”
“The first time I existed, I was just a few jerky animations on a giant piece of paper. I didn’t even have a voice, just bone-rattling sounds. Discord conjured me to cheer your brother up.” Skellinor shook her head. “It didn’t work. He still bawled even with my one dimensional back-rubs.”
“Looks like you had an upgrade.” Applejack chuckled. “Look at you, bein’ all three dimensional. Do people give you grief for bein’ . . . um . . . you?”
“As Pinkie pointed out, Ponyville’s built not only a tolerance, but a healthy understanding of Equestria’s weirdos, especially after Twilight’s ascension to the throne. This town recently got a changeling therapist. I’ve even seen several Kirin dressed up as opera singers tonight.”
Applejack looked over the vast multitude of colorful species running around, laughing, eating bags of candy and having spooky holiday fun under the autumn full moon. “You got a point, sugar cube.”
“Yeah, I may be new to this world, but I’ve been keeping my eyes open. Which is easy to do with no eyelids.” Skellinor attempted to wink at Applejack by flattening one of her eye-lights. “Not every town would treat me like a person, but I sure don’t have a bone to pick with Ponyville.”
Applejack tapped her chin. “The last time I had to deal with Discord’s creations, they were nearly brainless apple monsters that sang and recited lousy poetry. You seem to have your act together better than anythin’ your creator ever made before. I guess you’ve just had more time to think for yourself?”
“Perhaps he wants to test his life-creating abilities. It’s easy for him to mold creatures to keep himself company, but he could never carry on an intimate conversation with any of them other than me. Maybe that’s why he made me look like a Nightmare Night prop. If someone as off-kilter as him can make friends, then one of his conjurings can, too, if given enough time.”
“You seem to hold your own ground pretty well so far. Speakin’ of which, what’s this steady job you have, anyway?”
“Well, I . . .”
“Excuse me, miss bone-lady?” asked a small blue Minotaur child. “What’s that thing on your neck?”
Skellinor looked down at the shy creature. “Oh, this? It’s just something my . . . employer got for me.”
The Minotaur held out his hands and asked, “Can I touch it?”
She shook her head. “Sorry, kiddo. This thing sticks with me.”
He whimpered in frustration. Tears pillowed in his large yellow eyes. “I promise I won’t break it!”
“No means no. Now run along.”
The child’s eyes flared like fire. “No does not mean no, creature,” he snarled, his voice suddenly dropping a few octaves. “No means that you’re in my way!”
In a burst of yellow light, the Minotaur changed into a huge blue ram with immense horns. His large white eyebrows furrowed as he bellowed, “Give me my bewitching bell!”
Applejack tried to get between Skellinor and the ram, but the skeleton held her back. Skellinor glanced at her and made a quick shake of her head.
The ram stomped closer towards the mares. “Do you know who I am, fool?”
“Casually rude?” ventured Skellinor.
“I’m Grogar, you imbecile! I’m the father of monsters!” He reached out one hoof towards Skellinor. “That bell was stolen from me ages ago and I want it back! Now!”
Applejack grabbed Skellinor’s shoulders. “Let’s get out of here!”
Skellinor sighed and shook her head. “It’s too late, my friend. He’s got me.”
Grogar grinned and reached out towards the bell. “That’s right, beast. Nowhere to run.” He gripped the bell, gloating, “Nowhere to hi . . .”
In a sudden explosion of rainbow colors, the ram disappeared. Something fell and hit the ground with a high pitched squeak.
Applejack rubbed the colored lights from her eyes and squinted at where Grogar once stood. “Is that a . . . rubber chicken?”
Skellinor picked up the blue rubber squeeze toy, which had cartoonishly huge bug eyes that stared tiny daggers at the pony skeleton. White rubber eyebrows topped off the large head. The once impressive horns were now just painted on the back between the stubby wings.
She held up the toy and loudly proclaimed, “Discord? It worked! You can come out now!”
In a burst of white light, which made Applejack grumble as she had just rid her eyes of colored lights, only to have them replaced with white lights, Discord appeared and declared, “For once, my plans involving a villain didn’t result in property damage. Well done, my dear!”
Applejack scowled at Discord’s prize. “Skellinor, did you know that the bell was goin’ to do that?”
Skellinor hung her head, chuckling. “Yeah, I wasn’t supposed to spill the beans about the bell being rigged by Discord. He explained that the real Grogar was still out in the world somewhere, looking for the one item that would win him the world.”
Discord untied the bell from around Skellinor’s neck as he said, “As hideous as the bell was compared to Skellinor’s terrific costume, we both figured showing it off in fashion magazines would eventually grab Grogar’s attention.” With a finger snap, the bell flashed out of existence.
“This isn’t the end of my fight, abomination!” Threatened chicken-Grogar with adorable malevolence. “You and all your friends will pay for (SKWONK) will pay (SQUORRRNK) STOP THAT!”
Applejack laughed and said, “Skellinor, if I didn’t know any better, I swear you were squeezin’ Grogar extra hard out of sheer spite!”
“I can neither confirm nor deny that,” she replied as she mashed down on the toy even harder.
Grogar’s head lolled back and forth on the comically thin neck. “Discord, you fraud! You dared to imitate (HOOORNNNK) me? Everyone you know will suffer for this (WHOONNNK) indignity!”
Pinkie Pie bounced over to Discord in her immense Pinkie Pie balloon costume. Several balloons were rubbing against each other, making lightning arc across her body. She was wearing cupcake-shaped glasses, which she lowered to get a better look at Skellinor’s new toy. “Aww, it thinks it can still threaten us!” Pinkie said, giggling.
Chicken-Grogar gasped for breath after getting flattened from the squeezing. “I am older than Equestria! This world (SQUAAARRRNNK) will fall before my might! (WROARRK) AGH! My squeaker hurts!”
Discord blew out a raspberry, which then sprouted legs and ran down the street, singing show tunes. “My heart bleeds.” Patting Skellinor on the back, he asked, “Tell me, dear. What do you plan to do with our friend here?”
Applejack raised a hoof. “I can take that off your hooves, if you like. Wynona could use a new chew toy.”
Chicken-Grogar quailed, “(HRONK) No, not that!”
Pinkie waved a huge pink rubber hoof in front of Skellinor. “Ooh! Can I have that creepy-yet-still-funny toy? A rubber chicken-monster will be the perfect engagement present for Cheese Sandwich!”
Applejack gasped. “I didn’t know you and Cheese were gettin’ that serious with each other!”
“Hey, life changes fast. So do ponies like me!”
Chicken-Grogar muttered, “I suppose that fate is (HOOURNK) preferable.”
Skellinor nodded and handed the blue chicken toy to Pinkie. “Here you go. If he goes too far with his jabbering, just put some glue in the squeaker.”
“I’ll be (WACK) good!”
After Pinkie boinged into the crowd, while carrying chicken-Grogar in her teeth, Applejack said, “Well, that whole mess was a little scary, but it turned out to be kinda fun, too.”
Skellinor asked, “Isn’t that what Nightmare Night is supposed to be like?”
“Yeah, but with a lot fewer world-dominatin’ monsters,” she replied, cocking her head at Discord.
“I’m going to take that as a compliment, even if it isn’t,” said Discord with a huff and an upturned chin.
“Whatever,” replied Applejack. “Well, enjoy Nightmare Night, you two. I gotta go help Sweetie Belle get into her taco costume.”
Waving goodbye to Applejack, Discord asked, “So, how is Nightmare Night going for you?”
“It’s going better than I hoped! Everypony is so nice to me. They all know that I’m one of your creations, but that doesn’t seem to bother them.”
“I like to think that visiting Ponyville every few days to visit my love helped this place get used to people like us. I overheard from Applejack that you have a place of your own.”
Skellinor beamed proudly at her creator. “Yep! I now have a good job, too!”
Discord puffed out his lower lip in a pout. “Oh, you don’t want to keep helping me find threats to Equestria?”
“I can’t monster bait every day. That’s not good for my health.”
“That’s underst . . . oh.” Discord grinned as he wagged a finger at her. “Not that I’m not proud of you, but I don’t recall giving you a sense of humor.”
“Just because you aren’t watching someone, doesn’t mean they aren’t changing. Just look at Pinkie Pie getting engaged. She’s going to be a great mother some day.”
Scratching his head, Discord asked, “What’s this job you mentioned?”
Skellinor pulled out the drawing book from her rib cage. Flipping through a few pages, she said,”I don’t just draw up costume designs. I’m also a cartoonist!”
Tiny mushroom clouds burst from his ears. Shaking away the smoke, he replied, “I suppose I shouldn’t be surprised. You did make your first appearance as an animated drawing, so it makes a kind of chaotic sense that you would want to make your own art.”
Pointing at her most recent work, she showed it to Discord. “A magazine editor pays me to crank these out every week!”
Putting on his reading glasses, Discord studied Skellinor’s work. “Bone Pone Funnies? Whatever.” His brow wrinkled at one joke. “You have a rather grim sense of humor. People really go for this sort of thing?”
Skellinor shrugged. “Dark humor is cathartic. Laughing at the darkness of the world helps people deal with it better. That’s something that Nightmare Night celebrates to the nth degree, believe me.”
Discord rubbed his chin, thinking. “Nightmare Night ends at midnight, you know. Are you sure the locals will still treat you right when Hearth’s Warming Eve props go up?”
“I’m not worried about that. Nopony cares what a cartoonist looks like, anyway. As long as my funny bone doesn’t break, I’ll be all right.”
“I could make you a real princess, you know,” Discord suggested with a raised brow. “You wouldn’t want for anything.”
Her eye lights squeezed into twin slits as she peered warily at her creator. “I see what you’re doing, you know. But I’d rather pave my own path. Life isn’t worth living unless you struggle for it.”
Nodding, Discord felt a surge of warm pride for his finest work. He couldn’t help but ask one more question, however. One that parents often ask their children. “What if you fail?”
Closing her book, she chuckled. “I’ll just have to take my chances, I guess. Just like everyone else.”
“In other words?” Discord prompted.
Skellinor, taking the hint, replied, “I’ll just have to (pause for dramatic effect) roll them bones.”
“That’s my girl.”
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Very nice :p
9916768
Thanks!
These puns were... *puts on sunglasses* bone dry.
YEEEEEEAAAH!
. . . . .
Nah, I'm kidding, this was a fantastic short read and I loved everything about Skellinor. Great job!
9918198
I'm glad you liked it. that pun is definitely in Skellinor's wheelhouse. 💀
HELL-O ESKERATA
9919828
...Grogar.
Hello, Disc....
9919857
Hmmmm..... yes i understand the confusion.
That was..... quite disappointing to be honest.
I was ecstatic to learn that i would be in the Fourth Generation of My Little Pony... but..... then that happened.... eugh.
But i can assure you I'm the REAL Grogar.
Bundle of bones has never been so cute~!
9920475
Yeah, I like her. I've made cartoons of her, but not a whole story. (Yes, "Bone Pone Funnies" actually exist.)
I'm glad you liked the story.
soloquotes.com/wp-content/uploads/2019/08/Motivational-Quotes-Stay-Amazing.jpg
10761809
Right back atcha!
10762872
2spoopy4me
Featured in October for Rated 'E' for Everyone
11720876
Cool! Nice to see my old stuff getting attention.