A small ‘Do Not Disturb’ sign hung from the university office door. ‘Department of Parapsychology and Paranormal Studies’ was spelled in neat lettering on the glass, with three name plates below it: Dr. Cinderheart, Dr. Soulful Radiance, and Dr. Sunnie Bun. Scrawled in red paint, not so neatly over Sunnie’s name plate was one word: ‘Fatass’. The fatass in question was currently playing cards with one of the university’s guards, a donkey with a horrible poker face. Sunnie took a bite of an egg salad sandwich, and let her cards down on the table, her chubby yellow face flushed red with excitement.
“Royal Flush!” She said triumphantly. “Pay up, Vozzii!” The donkey snorted, then passed over his half of the brownie. Sunnie took a happy bite before gesturing over to the rest of the open lunch kit on the table next to him. “Another round? I think I spy some chocolates in there…” Vozzii’s answer was drowned out by the door slamming open, and a pegasus burst in, his brown mane dripping wet from the rain.
“This is it!” He exclaimed, hustled over to the shelves behind the table, leaving watery hoofprints behind him. “Sunnie, did you clear that tape yesterday? And the UV lenses, where did you put them?” He said over his shoulder as he dug through the accumulated junk. Sunnie cleared her throat.
“Hello to you too, Soul. We’re about to play another round, would you like to join in?” Sunnie started to shuffle the deck, but Soul rushed over and knocked it from her hooves as he grabbed a camera from the table.
“Just past ten o’clock, at the Central Library, six ponies actually witnessed a free-floating, full torso apparition!” Soul said over his shoulder, ears twitching with excitement. “It blew books off shelves from almost twelve hooves away, and you won’t believe what happened to one of the witnesses!” Sunnie rolled her eyes.
“I’m very excited, I’m very happy for you.” She deadpanned. “I want you to get right down there, check it out, and get right back to me.”
“No no no, no way, you’re not skipping out on us again. We need three pairs of hooves, and Cinder’s got hers full.” Soul tossed Sunnie’s jacket to her. “She took readings, and just the outside of the library is white hot! Buried the needle! We’re close on this one, I can feel it! What we’ll see today will revolutionize our field! Maybe even the world!” He paused for a moment, seeing the food debris on the table. “Is… is that the dean’s lunch? I thought you got banned from the break room after the last time you stole it.”
“I never stole it. It went missing, and just because my breath smelled like his fancy mustard, doesn’t mean I ate it.” Soul’s expression went blank, and Sunnie sighed again. “Well, okay, fine. But I didn’t take it this time!” She pointed at Vozzii. “He did!” Vozzii gave a little wave before going back to eating the dean’s carrots sticks.
“Nevermind.” Soul shrugged, and gave Sunnie a push towards the door. “Now, c’mon, the taxi’s waiting!” Sunnie yawned, but she started walking to the door, her jacket remaining undone.
“See you later, Voz.”
“Yo.” The donkey replied.
~~~***~~~
The taxi screeched off behind them as they looked up at the Central Library. It was a monolithic building, made of marble and stone, with two massive, imposing stone gargoyles keeping watch out front. The autumn wind swirled leaves around their hooves as Sunnie and Soul climbed the steps, the latter buzzing with excitement.
“The readings we’ve got so far are incredible! This is a big opportunity, Sunnie. The PKE meter went off the charts! And wait until you see the kirin who saw it first, she’s huge!” Sunnie’s eyebrow rose slightly, her curiosity piqued.
“Are you sure the equipment isn’t faulty?” She asked.
“No way! The data lines up perfectly. The last event gave us only a fraction of this reading!” Soul said, wiping moisture off the camera and popping the lens off.
“The last event? ‘The Great Spoon Shift’?” Sunnie scoffed. “It barely moved an inch.” She spotted Cinder crouched under one of the long reading tables, fiddling with some new equipment. Sunnie trotted over and started thumping her hooves on the table directly above the unicorn. “Ooooooooohhhhh.” Sunnie gave her best ghost impression. Cinder poked her head up.
“Sunnie! Glad you were able to get your fat ass up and out here.” Cinder grinned and gave her a hug before turning back to the equipment. “Hopefully you’re just as excited as us! Got the tape, Soul?”
“Yep!” Soul held up the camera, red light blinking to show he already had it recording. “How’s Pepper?”
“She’s in and out. Very queasy too.” Cinder finished calibrating the device she was working on. “Here, Sunnie, put this on. New and improved PKE meter, version two.” Sunnie slipped the device onto her foreleg. It looked like an exercise band with a big black box sewn into it. Cinder pressed a button on the side, and the box lit up, two thin antennas sliding out of the top of the device. Twin rows of pulsating white lights travelled up and down the sides and green bars jumped in the middle of the screen. “Easier to read, and more quiet too.”
“Hopefully less likely to catch fire as well.” Sunnie said dryly. “I’m assuming when all the green bars hit the top of the screen, there’s ghosts?”
“You got it!” Cinder smiled, and was about to say something else when a harried stallion rushed up to them.
“Pardon me, Ms. Panclair is awake and alert, but we don’t know for how long. Come quickly!”
~~~***~~~
Pepper Panclair was stretched out on a couch, moaning and groaning quietly as the trio stepped into the small room. Sunnie’s jaw dropped at the sight of the mare. Soulful’s description of ‘huge’ didn’t prepare her for just how big the kirin truly was. Her belly rose high off the couch, slightly red and taut with the amount of food contained within. Pepper’s face was pale, tinged a sickly green, and she stifled a belch with a hoof, gulping rather loudly afterwards.
“Ms. Panclair? Hello, I’m Professor Soulful. These are my associates, Professor Cinder and Sunnie. We’re with the University, we specialize in Parapsychology. We’d like to ask you some questions, if you don’t mind.” Soulful pulled a tape recorder out of his bag and placed it on the coffee table next to Pepper. She nodded, shifting on the couch gingerly. “Can you tell me what you saw?”
“I… I saw a brilliant light. It came towards me, slowly, and I… I… urrrrp! Oog… e-excuse me. I, I don’t remember seeing legs, but it had arms, because it reached out to me, and then I…I just started eating…” Pepper whimpered, and lightly rubbed the small portion of her belly she could reach. “I couldn’t stop… it was a-as if I had no control… huuuurp! O-oh… l-like someone was… feeding me…” Her head lolled back, and she seemed to be struggling to stay focused. Soulful turned to the stallion who’d fetched them.
“Did you see the apparition?”
“I… I don’t know. I, I heard screaming and came downstairs. It was a mess down there. Books all over the place. Then I heard gulping and slurping coming from the break room. The lights were flickering, and it was freezing. She was in there, eating everything in sight. N-not just lunches and snacks. She drained the ketchup packets, the mustard bottles, even… even coffee grounds. Everything edible was gone.” He looked over at the bloated kirin. “She wasn’t even grabbing them. They floated over to her. I thought for a moment she was using magic of some sort but… there was no aura around the food, and they were moving in this odd, jerky motion.” He trailed off. Sunnie moved in closer to Pepper.
“I’m afraid I have to ask you a couple standard questions.” She said in a low voice. “Have you had anything to drink today? Any medication that could cause hallucinations?” Pepper shook her head slowly, cheeks puffing out as she let out another belch.
“N-no. I was just going to get my morning c-coff-aaaarph… oooooooh…” Sunnie patted the kirin gently on the shoulder.
“It’s okay Ms. Panclair. Just relax now. We’ve got all the information we need.” She nodded to Cinder and Soulful before bounding over to the door. “Let’s go see this ghost.” She grinned, waving the PKE metre strapped to her foreleg.
~~~***~~~
The basement was freezing cold. Sunnie shivered and pulled her jacket closer around her pudgy frame. Cinder and Soul followed behind her, their eyes shining with excitement. Sunnie’s breath puffed out into a fog that pooled under her chin.
“Where to?” She asked.
“Follow that.” Cinder simply pointed at the PKE meter on her foreleg. Sunnie poked the device, and it came to life with a quiet whirling noise. The green bars jumped and leaped as she turned and pointed it in a semi circle. She started forwards into the clutter, keeping her eyes peeled, periodically changing her course to keep following the bright green bars. She stopped suddenly after turning a corner, sending Cinder and Soulful bumping into her. In the next aisle, books were stacked into a long column stretching up to the ceiling. Thick gobs of fluid dripped off the stack.
“Wow!” Soul hissed. “Just like the Happy Hooves Elementary incident! Cinder, get a sample of that slime!” Cinderheart fumbled for a moment before pulling out a plastic dish, and scooped some of the slime into it. Sunnie slid her way past the stacks the best she could, her wide hips bumping the books, smearing some of the fluid on her jacket, and she grimaced.
“These books are hot.” Sunnie said, fighting the urge to retch as she wiped her jacket’s sleeve on a bookshelf. “But I think there’s something behind it, this thing’s going crazy.” The PKE V.2. flashed and buzzed on her wrist, green lights pulsing wildly, and Sunnie swore it was starting to heat up. She continued shuffling carefully around the stacks of books, her breath puffing out of her mouth like a steam train. Cinder and Soul followed, the temperature in the basement seemingly getting colder and colder. The three huddled together as they followed the green bars, noticing an eerie white light coming through the bookcases. They let out a collective gasp as they finally rounded the last bookcase and saw the source of light.
It was a pony. At least, most of a pony. It had a head, and forelegs, but it’s body trailed off into a thin wisp past it’s muscular chest. Ghostly armour, reminiscent of the antique Royal Guards, adorned the spectre's transparent body. The ghost stallion brushed a blond lock of his ethereal mane out of his eyes and continued looking down at the book fluttering on the table in front of him. Cinder immediately brought the camera up and started filming the ghost, her hooves trembling slightly.
“A full torso apparition!” Soulful hissed. “Pepper wasn’t kidding!” He scribbled something in his notepad, gnawing at the end of his pencil in excitement.
“So, uh, now what?” Sunnie asked, staring wide eyed at the ghost. “Do we leave? Say hello? Read it it’s rights?”
“One of us should make contact.” Soul said. “Actually try to speak to it!” He looked right to see Sunnie and Cinder backing slowly behind the bookcase, Cinder levitating the camera so it could still record the ghost.
“Good idea!” Sunnie smiled nervously. “You first.” The pegasus gulped audibly, then steadied himself. He took a few steps forward, and cleared his throat.
“G-good afternoon! I am Profes- Doctor Soulful Radiance. I am one of the heads of the Department of Parapsychology and P-paranormal Studies at the Central Manehatten University. I’d like to ask you a few questions, i-if you don’t mind.” The ghost looked up from his book, and shook his head, a condescending smirk on his face, then went back to reading. Soul went back around the corner, his face pale and nervous.
“Well that didn’t work.” Sunnie said flatly. “What now?” Soul and Cinder glanced at each other. Sunnie rolled her eyes. “Really? You’re leaving this up to me?” She stepped out around the bookshelf, her temper getting the best of her. “Hey, ghostface! You think it’s funny to force-feed defenseless mares, huh? How about you feed somepony who’s ready for i-.” Sunnie’s tirade died as suddenly as it began as the pony-sized ghost in front of her turned, and suddenly transformed into a hideous beast. It stretched up and out, the armour twisting into a terrifying ghostly mass of shattered metal. Its horn elongated, jutting out further, twisting like the gnarled branches of an old tree. Its eyes disappeared, leaving empty, black sockets behind, and it reached its forelegs towards Sunnie, its voice rumbling unearthly through its dripping jaws.
“Then let me feed you!” Sunnie screamed and ran back around the corner. The ghost followed, books exploding off the shelves as it passed. The trio bolted up and out of the basement, bowling over various other ponies in the library in their mad dash. The stallion from before ran behind them.
“Did you see it? What was it?”
“We’ll get back to you!” Soulful yelled over his shoulder as they burst through the doors out into the crisp fall air. The stallion stopped at the top step and watched as the three professors scrambled across the street, all glancing back at the library in abject terror.
~~~***~~~
“How about you feed somepony who’s ready for it?” Soulful squeaked. Cinder snorted and almost stumbled into a puddle. Sunnie glared at both of them as they walked back to the university, the adrenaline finally starting to fade.
“At least I did something other than hide behind a bookshelf!” She replied indignantly. Soul nodded in agreement,
“True. Speaking of which…” He reached into his pocket and pulled out a chocolate bar. He tapped Sunnie on the nose with it. “I think someone earned this for being so brave!” Sunnie blinked.
“I can’t take that. It’s your favorite!” Soulful responded by tearing the wrapper off and shoving it into her mouth before she could do anything.
“You run when a ghost offers to feed you, but you let Soul stuff you whenever he wants? Tsk tsk!” Cinder chuckled. Sunnie glanced away, a little red in the face as she quickly swallowed the chocolate. Soul cleared his throat, trying to hide his blush.
“Speaking of stuffing, we got enough data today that I think we’re close to being able to actually catch a ghost! I like the portable boxes you came up with, Cinder. ” The brown pegasus said.
“We can start thinking about stuffing ghosts into boxes after we get the funding.” Cinder muttered dryly. The three walked into the university, the other two hustling ahead of Sunnie to view the video. Sunnie hung back a little, darting into the break room to see what was in Vozzii’s lunch. She walked into their office a couple minutes later, munching on an egg salad sandwich, to find her friends crowded around a mini TV connected to the camcorder.
“Pause it! Pause it!” Soulful hopped up, his hoof tapping the screen lightly at the image frozen on the screen, the image distorting slightly with each tap. “Look at that!” He pointed at the ghost, which was beginning to change form after Sunnie confronted it. Through the lens, it looked a lot different. Energy crackled around the spirit, and Sunnie looked tiny by comparison. “Roll it forwards slowly!” The video went forwards frame by frame, Cinder and Soulful pressed up close to the screen, watching in amazement. The eerie energy spiralled outwards, until it obscured the wall opposite. Tendrils reached out towards Sunnie, as if to wrap her up, before the picture blurred as Cinder took off running. “Amazing.” Soulful breathed, rewinding the tape over again. Cinderheart clapped her hooves and stepped back.
“Evidence. We got it! Actual, physical evidence!” She whooped. “They’ll have to give us funding now! Soul, don’t wear out the tape!” Soulful pulled himself back from the screen and punched the eject button on the tape.
“Don’t worry! I’m making a copy right now.”
“You’ll do no such thing!” A nasally voice interrupted them. The trio looked at the door to see the dean, two janitors, and Vozzii, not able to meet Sunnie’s eyes, standing in the doorway. “I believe you have property that doesn’t belong to you.” The two stallions stepped forwards and snatched the tape and camera out of Soulful’s hooves.
“You can’t do that!” Soulful said. The dean simply sneered.
“Yes I can, Doctor. I have long been lobbying the board to cease funding your fantasies, and they’ve finally agreed with me. You will waste this university’s money, time, and resources no longer!” The dean sniffed the air, before turning to Sunnie, who stifled a burp. “What is that smell?”
“Egg salad sandwich.” She said quietly. “Vozzii owed me a lunch.” Vozzii’s eyes went wide and he shook his head as the dean rounded on him.
“I saw you eating lunch earlier! It was you who stole my food today, wasn’t it?” Sunnie stepped forward.
“For the record-.” She was cut off by the dean’s shriek, his body trembling with rage.
“I want you off this university’s campus. ALL OF YOU! NOW!”
~~~***~~~
WHEN THERE'S SOMETHING GOOD!!!
IN YOUR GLOBAL FEED!!!
WHACHU GONNA DO?!?
JUST READ IT!!!
Can hardly wait for the full story to come out because then i can read the full thing in one go :P
night of the larding dead!
Awwww ship it