• Published 23rd Oct 2019
  • 2,292 Views, 141 Comments

Dear Diary - KitsuneRisu



These are the final pages of the diary of Fluttershy, collected from her home and from the waters of the pond by her retreat. We hope she returns to us soon.

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Unknown

It’s













kicking

Comments ( 38 )

WELP.

That was greatly disturbing and truly horrifying. A great horror story indeed.

Beautifully disgusting and insidious. I enjoyed this quite a lot, I hope we get to see what mayhem befalls the others.

Oh wow, absolutely incredible! This is horrifying and creepy in all the best ways! Gave me chills!

9903335
Ah, that does scan much better. I must have missed the 'i' in 'ichor,' and my brain seized on "tribe" before picking up "left rib." Thanks heaps for checking my work.

Isn't it funny how our brains work like that?

i love me some horrors, but I don't know what to make of all the blank pages (I looked for something hidden) and I gave up on decyphering the gobbledygook entry

I didn’t think you could but honestly you one upped the last diary horror.

9904838
That's the problem. If I ever write a 3rd I have no idea what to do anymore :derpyderp1:

The fact this wonderfully-horrific story has only 15 likes is horrific in of itself.

Seriously, this was a fantastic read.

Well. Now I'm hungry.

9906470
Well, there's one pony I can think of whom the obelisk could not drive mad, for what mind can break what is already ...pink?

Holy... Yep. This was fantastic. Absolutely fantastic.

9906470
Not to assert direction or the like, but if you were ever to pursue further stories in this setting you could take it in quite a few ways. AJ's reactions and following despair at the outcome of Flutters? The shock and unrest that Princess Twilight would bring if she were to be confirmed missing? Perhaps even Celestia and Luna's grim realization that their Element bearers royally have fucked up by awakening things older than horse?

Could easily round it out with an AJ/Pinkie finale. The after effects of all these horrific goings on's have to have SOME outcome! :yay:

9914373
No worries! I do take a lot of feedback and suggestions to heart.

I guess to clarify, though, I already sort of kind of know _where_ it's headed if you know what I mean? I just have to decide sort of the format it'll take place in and what kind of little cool things I can do to amp up the horror without it gently sliding into try-hard edgelord territory, which I feel this one already borders very precariously.

But your thoughts align a lot with mine already, really. Obviously, the final pairing will be AJ and Pinkie, with a few other ideas sprinkled in, and in fact would take place a week after the disappearances of the four others. I hadn't thought to involve Celestia and Luna, but hey, there's something there maybe!

9912214
In addition to the above, I already had an idea involving that! No, Pinkie shan't be immune to the madness, but there will be some good use of the character, I hope!

Either way, this is only if and when I decide to write a sequel! I'm pretty busy and I need to continue writing dumb weird sandwich stories. :c

Thanks for reading though!

And Minnesota claims another two victims.
I didn't realize until the end that this was happening simultaneously. Based on skimming #Entry 649, Fluttershy and Rarity did seem to be losing some of the same days, and the "child" there could be the "child" here based on the timeline. At some point I'll have to read them both together, matching day for day, to see if there are any other good parallels.

I am still concerned about the fate of that possum, though. The question had better be addressed in the sequel.

9933554
The possum's name was Lady Retchtooth III

9936491
Thank you for not being afraid to answer the Real Questions.

9937626
For some reason you can 'select' the blank page chapters and open it up as a picture, or download it. During a preview it looks like there is words or something on it but when you view or download it, it just shows a black picture. It happens when I hold click using my phone.

9937765
Oh! Okay, what's happening there is that I'm using TRANSPARENT BOXES to control spacing in this story, because otherwise FimFic doesn't let you start a line down the page. The text formatting in its greyed-out state is actually using native tags to Fimfic; all of that is text alone and not part of an image.

The only 'images' here are just big old transparent boxes. That's all. There are no other images, and you're not missing anything. The faint words are faint on purpose, and is just normal text. Does this help?

9937939
Yes it does help, thank you. :twilightsmile: Though it does add a little extra mystery to the story for the conspiracy types out there. Thank you again for the info and this wonderfully written story.

Excellent story, and a great example of "horror as a diary" done right.

I found Entry #649 intriguing, but not particularly horrific since to me it never went far beyond your Lovecraftian "Strange artefact found, speaks dark truths that make its listeners go insane" plot. This ticked all my boxes for horror and then some, while still building off its predecessor's lore to make me glad I'd read both in order.

The pacing was brilliant, and the to-do list and occasional recipe (and the initially subtle perversions of them) both seem like an actual thing a canonical Fluttershy would keep in a "casual-feeling" diary, while also being a fanastic way to characterise her descent.

Your descriptions of viscera later on honestly left me feeling slightly sick (in a good way!) - the entries gave just enough detail to let my imagination go wild with mental imagery. And on that note, it was pretty genius to tie everything to the trauma of Fluttershy's stillbirth - it makes you wonder how much of it was the object, and how much of it was Fluttershy needing a tiny push to go off the deep end by herself.

A great story that, even several hours on, has left me feeling... unsettled.

Just one thing I'm confused about: Chapter 4 ends with the note "Their lives were not on my hooves", plural. Were there other deaths that Fluttershy felt responsible for, other than the stillbirth of Clear Skies?

9938695
Hey! Thanks so, so much for the lovely comments. I'm really happy that people are enjoying this! I was worried that this one 'went too far' to be honest, but it seems people really like it, so hey! I'm happy that you're happy.

To answer your question:
The other life she's referring to was the baby's father whom she ran out on. That's all.

one of my favorite horror stories on this site!!! incredible job :heart:

9941996
Thanks for the response! I had a hunch it was that, but felt like that was a bit of an overkill reaction to running out on the father.

...Which, now that I think about it, actually seems like a thing that this story's Fluttershy would do, burden herself with that blame until she almost considered it akin to killing someone. "Sometimes things aren't my fault" and all...

Kicking in the womb
He gets up and leaves the room
All he has to say is you got what you deserve

This and its prequel were so intriguing and fascinating. I really hope you have more planned. It was stated that rainbow had visited applejack and left something with her, I really hope that is the next story's focus!
Absolutely brilliant writing. From start to finish this was such a trip

I'm so shocked that I have not read this wonderful bit of eldritch horror along with its equally wonderful prequel until now. This absolutely does a wonderful job capturing the feeling of impending doom and helplessness of lovecraftian horror. Especially with characters falling apart while thinking they're absolutely fine, only to have momentary flashes of sanity and realizations of reality right before the end. The details, the subtle nature, the way you aren't blatant but also make sure that the reader can piece the full story together unlike a lot of stories like this.

I'm definitely watching you from now on, because you've quickly become one of my favorite authors on here. Thank you so much!

10410420
Hey, thank YOU! =3

This is an extremely fantastic story. Thank you so much for writing it and sharing your recipes too! I’m looking forward to trying them out at home.

10527896
Of course, friend!

Such a delightfully dark series. I can hardly wait for the next story.

Holy shit. Never in my life have I been this unsettled by a story. (Spoilers - and my theory on the story so far - below!)

Not even gonna lie, I was reading the "FEED (x infinity)" entry, heard something clatter in another room, and nearly pissed myself. Never thought I'd be jumpscared by a book! XD
At first, I assumed that the entity (who might be named mnegloratiisth?) was a seafaring creature, like Cthulu from Lovecraft lore. It seemed to be that way at first, what with Rarity living in a seaside town and the first object leading Twilight to the bay. But knowing it has something to do with the stars... that's even more ominous.
The whole prophecy bit about "the seed, the meat, the sire" is kind of hard to unravel, seeing as all three could apply to Fluttershy in this story. But judging by the description of the object from Rarity's memoirs, I'd assume that Rarity is carrying the "seed", Fluttershy is carrying the "meat", and the "sire"... is yet to be determined.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but will the next story (if this does have a conclusion) be from Pinkie's perspective? We've already got the two unicorns and two pegasi. It seems that the writers of the "final pages" were ponies who were exposed to the artifacts through another source, and the only other artifact left is in Applejack's possession.

TLDR; Amazing story! You can has upvote! :D

10952829
Thank you so much for your comment. And I'm very glad you enjoyed it.

You've actually really got most of it spot on. The creature, whose name is indeed something like that (it's been a while, haha) is actually meant to be an unknowable, much like Cthulhu. Of course, this series was very much inspired by Lovecraft.

There is a pattern, though; everyone affected gets drawn to water. And if you look at the art (which I also hand-make very intentionally), the first one is underwater as well, and the image I used (photoshopped heavily) is actually a horse fetus. Just a little easter egg.
For dear Dairy, the picture is of a skull of a pregnant horse. Of course, this isn't meant to be 'figured out' but it's just a thing I threw in because I'm dumb.

the prophecy, if you really want to know, is the same thing. The seed, the meat and the sire all point to the rebirth of whatever god lies under the water. The water is a mirror to the stars (theme of the first book) and reflects where the creature came from - outer space. But it now lies underwater, stuck or something or other, until it can be reborn literally through a pony.

Twilight was the sacrifice (the meat), Fluttershy is the mother (the sire), and... well, that leads to the 3rd book (the seed) which unfortunately never materialised because life caught up with me.

Without giving too much away, the next story will indeed be Pinkie and Applejack, but actually, it would be Applejack's Orchard Log that you would be reading. The main theme would be 'the seed' which parallels both apple seeds and the apple farm that Applejack would have worked on in her future. It would wrap up the mythology to a sufficient degree to explain mostly what you've already guessed, and bring an ending to the incident that befell our characters.

Apart, the stories are good. Together, they are amazing.

Just got done reading this gem and it is simply wonderful. I love how you keep the perspective from the MC POV and it is up to the reader to piece it together. I look forward to the third entry in this series. Simply Marvelous!

Holy shit. This was a fucking ride, such a blast and a half to read through. I feel like this one works much better because the prequel reads like a prose, while this one reads much personal. Like, this one has that candid diary-writing charm to it. Never have a sequel blow its predecessor so far out of the water. This is freaking amazing! Absolutely praiseworthy!

This kind of works is why I read fanfictions and amateur webnovels instead of professionally published stuff. Finding such brilliant diamonds in the rough, coarse field of sand gives me euphoria and satisfaction like no other. Kudos to you, author, for this amazing piece. I felt intrigued, mystified, anxious, confused, scared, disgusted, repulsed, and terrified, and it was such a good ride from start to finish. The word "Lovecraftian" has been thrown around so much that it has lost its meaning, but believe me when I say that this truly is one such work; hell, the personal touch of diary format elevates it up one tier above that.

My only wish is to see what the broken image links are.
I've looked into the comments, and seems like they're nothing for me to worry about. False alarm, then.

11695621

Hey! I honestly don't come to FimFic much anymore because life is life. But I just somehow jumped on randomly and saw all your comments. Loved reading through them =)

Yes, I don't know what's up with the images... I feel FimFic no longer likes external images anymore? I'm not sure. I've not been around much. This is a shame because a LOT of my works use images to fluff up the writing. But for these, you've missed nothing. They were just 'spacer' images that were there to 'force' text down the page or force a 'blank page' for the sake of the meta.

I'll have to think about something else.

It's also really interesting that you've read this story at this time. I'm actually planning to actually finish this trilogy. =) Thanks so much for reading. I'm really really happy you liked it. =)

11698591
Oh my gosh! Thank you for responding, and it's nice to know you enjoyed seeing me in my own ride. I'll be waiting for that third part, then. Best of luck to you and your writings. :pinkiehappy:

11698591
Just got through with re-reading this and saw this comment.. omg?! A third part?! I'm so excited you don't even know!! I love this series so much!

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