From the Shadows, They Strike Part 3
Half a league, half a sky, half a heaven onward; they climb to the dark of the moon. A solemn knight clad in armor both of body and mind, she soldiers ever onward, bearing black twisted metal and a stoney facade. Unflinching in the face of death, unyielding as they reach the Nightmare’s hold, there is no force—neither of moon nor of sun—capable of stopping her in her pursuit.
For justice will be hers.
“Uh, Equis to Night? You there?”
I blinked a few times as Diamond stirred me from my musings, the locker rooms otherwise empty. Her smile was relentless—not infectious, but unyielding as she drew me from my brooding with a chaste peck to the cheek.
“Yeah, I’m here.” A smile here, a nuzzle there. It was impossible for me to resist returning her affection in kind.
“You know, when I called you out the other day, I wasn’t really expecting you to challenge them all to a duel.” With a sly grin and a devious giggle, my marefriend nipped my ear. “But I do appreciate the thought.”
“Schattenkrieg gets called for a lot less in some of the colonies.” I glanced down, ears splaying. “I should have called it from the start, when they were only targeting me.”
“Pffft! You think that would have changed anything?” Diamond threw her head back and laughed. “These bullies have no honor, doofus. Maybe thestral ones do, but I bet you ten bits none of them even show up tonight. All this is gonna do is prove they’re cowards.”
“Maybe…”
Before I could even start to frown, Diamond slugged me in the shoulder, her hoof ringing off my armor. “No. None of that. You got out the armor just for me; wear it like it’s made to be worn.”
I hadn’t exactly worn the armor for her, but no reason to tell her that. Instead, I stood to attention and snapped off a salute, a statue in every way. Diamond’s shark-like grin could have given Sergeant Smiles a run for her money, and my marefriend circled me, humming and hawing and doing all manner of things as she inspected me.
She drew real close—far closer than any sane regulations would ever allow—and chuckled as my hackles visibly rose. Her breath sent goosebumps rampaging across me, and the no-good cheat kept brushing our coats and flicking her tail. It was bliss and torture all in one, because I knew if I moved it would end.
“Much better.” She finally pulled back with a titter and patted me on the shoulder.
“Would be so much easier if you didn’t cheat.” I could afford to neither sag nor sigh in relief.
“You know you love it, though.” Tweaking my nose, she winked at me.
“I will bite you.”
“Ooh, now there’s an idea, isn’t there?~” Arching her brow, Diamond ignored my growl and pecked me on the lips. “Save it for the arena, though. It’s almost time to shine.”
“How many are there?” Taking a deep breath, I tapped a hoof against the tiled floor.
“Well, the stadium is packed, but last I checked, the jackasses were still a no show.” Diamond shrugged. “Like I said, ten bits.”
“Did Finch show?”
“Oh, yeah.” Diamond’s grin grew twice as wide. “She’s absolutely brimming right now with a handful of other teachers. I think they’re here to step in if things go too far.”
Rolling my eyes, I gave a hard snort. “That’s Dad’s job, not that I expect him to need to do anything. I don’t plan on giving Crusty the chance.”
“On the bright side, Miss Cheerilee is here with her husband, so that’s at least two adults you know are here to support you.”
“You know that Miss Cheerilee would never want her students fighting.” I shook my head. “She’ll probably end up squirming and trying to hold herself back the whole time.” Flicking my tail, I allowed myself the tiniest of frowns. “Better get out there and get this over with, then.”
With a deep breath, I pushed towards the door and out into the hall, sauntering through the empty gym and out to the school field. I may have used just a little more force than necessary—I did blow the doors open with an audible slam, after all—but presentation was almost as important as actual strength.
My greaves flattened the grass as I strode over the field towards the bleachers. Both claws and wing blades were blunted with training enchantments as usual, but I didn’t mind. The spells lent a vague and ghostly shimmer to my weapons that added an air of deadly menace to them I liked; they were exactly the kinda showy that could end conflicts before they began, and whenever Mom finally let me remove them, the first thing I was gonna do was pay Miss Trixie to have her copy the effect.
My cuirass was a tarnished and twisted mess that teetered on the edge of regulation much like all the armor Aunt Mercy had given me over the years. Blackened and brushed with all kinds of charcoal and ash, it was splashed with all sorts of shades that made it look scorched by the sun itself. Twisted and slaggy spikes almost curled like horns as if they’d been twisted and warped from the heat, and if you looked at it side by side with a book of old Night Guard armors, you would eventually find the one mine was inspired by based on the spikes and the incredibly edgy hollow in the chest.
It was from just after Luna fell to the Nightmare, and the Night Guard were feeling rightfully rebellious. Taking on the armor was a way to maintain duty while not so subtly snubbing the Princess for cutting out the heart of their cause.
I liked it, as edgy as it was. Sure, it was a little much, but— Okay, it was a lot much. Aunt Mercy had gotten an illusionist to make the hollow appear like an endless pit surrounded by a fiery brand, after all. But it got ponies to shut up and stare. It showed others that I wasn’t to be messed with, and that alone had won me a few tournaments in the Junior Guard.
It served me well as I walked onto the battlefield, the whole school going silent as they stared. Most of them had seen the full armor once or twice, but it always caused a ruckus when I dug it out. Nothing compared to the sight of me sauntering up in the shadows of a dying sunset like a knight who had faced the full might of the sun and survived.
“Hah! Nice cosplay, neeeeeeeeeerd! No wonder you abandoned your team for games club!” Somehow, it didn’t phase Crusty in the slightest, though I took pleasure in the rest of my former ‘team’ looking much more uneasy. It didn’t last as Crusty pointed and laughed, emboldening the others to snicker and sneer.
Fangs grit, my temple twitched at his mockery, and I snorted before looking at Abacus Finch on the sidelines. “See that? It’s trash talk now, but that einzeller doesn’t have two brain cells to rub together and think about there being a time and a place. That’s what your students have to put up with.”
Finch bit her lip, her glower intensifying, but said nothing.
“Oh, wahhhhh, wah! Poor, little Nightingale! Did I hurt your feelings so bad you can’t even trash talk back?”
“The fact that you can’t tell how much I was insulting you is a pretty good indicator of just why you’re an einzeller.”
“Don’t know what that means. Don’t care.” Rolling his eyes, Crusty smirked at me. “The boys and I are just here to prove you aren’t as hot as you think you are. Not sure how the school can’t see it. You look like a lumbering LARPer.” His smile grew as the grinding of my fangs became audible.
“This armor is steeped in tradition as old as—”
“—your edgy, six-year old imagination?”
“—the Nightmare herself!” I growled, hoof pawing at the ground as the shadows stirred around me. “I doubt you could possibly understand just why it was forged so… edgily.”
“Because I’m a daydweller, huh?” He grinned. “And you think you’re just that much better than me?”
“No, because you’re an idiot, and I know I’m that much better than you.”
“Big words from somepony who’s all bark and no bite.” He took a step forward which prompted the rest of the team to do the same. “I’m not the one who abandoned my team or got shoved in a locker like a measly little mouse.”
“You want to see my bite, huh?” The school watched with bated breath as I too advanced, the shadows on the field growing just a tiny bit as the world seemed to darken. I wasn’t as good as Dad yet, and maybe I never would be, but the looks on their faces as their own shadows started to steam with darkness was rewarding in its own way.
Crusty was the only one unfazed, even having the gall to grin wider as he looked down. “Hah! Is that all you’ve got? A bit of smoke and mirrors? I bet you can’t even—”
The first hint of moon crept over the horizon, and with it the duel officially could begin. I didn’t give Crusty time to finish, reaching into my shadow and out of one of my foes’. It was one on, like, twenty. Fairness was long gone out the window.
Grabbing one of the three pegasi there—Gale Force, running back, cutie mark in heavy duty weather magic—I dragged him down into the dark and left him there, my own shadow keeping him company and making sure I didn’t lose him in the in-between.
I could feel him bucking wildly to try and escape my shadow’s iron grip, but there was little he could do but panic and waste his breath in the inky blackness. There was no air where I’d taken him. Rather than flying through the void, I had swam through a sea of shadows to reach him, my first victory assured once he either passed out or was left too tired to fight.
Brutal? Yes, but I had to clear the skies as fast as possible or there was a chance I might actually lose.
As I burst back out of the darkness—devoid of my otherwise busy shadow—it was to tackle the other pegasus and sock them hard in the gut. Breath was beyond important in flight, air flow and control was everything. Knocking the wind out of him allowed me to jump and take to the skies with only Crusty capable of following.
Of course, the unicorns peppered me with potshots. Their aim was even pretty good from all the practice they got passing their balls around. But their strength? Their will? Hah! None of them had the training to hit me harder than a ripe tomato. I would be lucky to earn a bruise if they didn’t up their game.
And Crusty? The hühnerblut wasn’t even taking off to chase me. He just stood there, smirking and waiting.
“What? Are you looking for a one-on-one?” He laughed. “I’m not stupid, you know. I know exactly how this all works. We’re a lot alike, after all.”
“I am nothing like you.” With a hiss, I dove for a unicorn, juking his attempt at a jab with a feint and shooting into his shadow to pop out and slug somepony else. Dodging and weaving, I was able to glance most blows off my armor, running up to buck an earth pony down and leap back into the air.
“Oh, so you aren’t trying to goad me into attacking you alone in the air?” The laugh got louder, grating in my ears as I flapped a little higher. “You aren’t exactly subtle about it! The intimidating armor, the trash talk, the ruthless force~ It’s a game to see who goads who into slipping up first.”
“I don’t need you to slip up!” I dove again only for Crusty to blur into motion. Freaking pegasi cheats. He was way faster than he looked, a gale of wind blasting him at me with just a bit of weather magic.
It was a textbook guard maneuver.
He. Had. Training.
I was caught so off guard, I could only blink as time seemed to slow. Crusty rammed me right out of the sky and sent me tumbling to the ground. Intercepting me before I could reach my target, the guano-guzzler landed a good, solid sucker punch. He let me push him away, didn’t follow up, and merely laughed at me as I took back to the skies.
“See what I mean, little wannabe~” His wings were spread, and his chest was puffed out. The stands had been shocked silent once more as Crusty killed the cheers I had been garnering.
Buck, that hoof had hurt. My head was throbbing, and all I could see was that tackle coming at me again and again as I retreated up into the air.
He. Dared.
That bully dared use Guard techniques against me?! He dared to defile everything they stood for?! That… that heathen! He thought he stood a chance just ‘cause he knew a few tricks?! He had the gall to compare himself to me!
My wings twitched, causing me to bob a little unsteadily in flight. The air around me started to darken as I sucked the light out of it, and I called my shadow back to me. Swooping down, I dumped the woozy and almost unconscious pegasus that came with her by dad before landing to advance with a stoney scowl towards Crusty.
The little potshots continued to glance off me, and not even the new massive and throbbing headache changed the fact they were but mosquito bites before my wrath. The rest of the team charged as their so-called ‘leader’ held back with a grin, but I batted them to the side be it by hoof or wing. Sliding into my shadow, dodging the worst of hits, I steadily advanced towards the grinning loon and swung.
He caught my hoof, his strength an even match for mine, chuckling as I was forced to back off once more when the hoofball team threatened to surround me. “That’s not going to work~ You can’t bully me into submission like you did the others~”
Fangs bared, I turned my attention to the others, too smart to waste breath on talking back. “Surrender now, or you’re first. I have no issues going through you all to get to him.”
“Hah! You think you can handle us all? Crusty is right! You really are full of—”
That one was the first to go. I grabbed him while my shadow grabbed another, and the two of us twisted to slam their thick skulls together. No mercy. No holding back. Their unconscious bodies made good shields as we flung them at the clump of unicorns and charged.
“It was a mistake to group up if you’re going to be a bunch of pansies.” I growled at them as they scrambled back. “This is what Dad calls a ‘Target-rich environment!’” Leaping between them, I shrieked loud enough that their ears flattened and their horns flickered, eyes screwing shut at the auditory assault. “‘Cause now I can do this!” My hoof lashed out to rap their flickering horns.
It was a beyond dirty trick, putting them through not just one but two forms of magical backlash. The poor foals had kept shooting until it was too late. They didn’t have the training to understand. Normal backlash was painful enough, but easy to avoid. So few unicorns failed to understand that was never the case in a fight. The horn was just another muscle in need of training, and without it, those idiots would probably have migraines for a week.
Maybe more since I wasn’t pulling punches.
Still, as the unicorns fell that left about five more earth ponies to deal with, and I leapt away to avoid the inevitable stampede. I almost got caught as Crusty tried to rush me again, but this time when we went tumbling I socked him.
He was off me in a whirl of wind before I could keep going, one hoof to his bloodied snout. Instead of whimpering in pain or flinching, though, he gave a wheezing laugh and wiped his hoof clean. “Good one.”
“Shut up. Shut up. Shut up!” Nightmother above, that laugh was so annoying by now—so taunting. Could he not just bucking learn his lesson?!
Two more earth ponies fell as I grabbed the lead charger and twirled him so another barreled right into his side. The impact slid me back a few steps, but I was able to turn the tables before I was toppled. Sinking partway into my shadow, I twisted to lock my hind hooves in place. Now anchored and rooted, I hefted the earth pony up and swung him like a bat, knocking the charger back with a yelp.
“Only three meatshields left.” I snorted and glared at Crusty.
“Make it two.” One of the three shook his head and bolted.
“Err… one?”
“How about none!”
And with the scrabbling of cowardly hooves, it was just me and Crusty left.
“What are you gonna do now without all your backup?” I panted as I stomped forward, chest heaving as I growled at my foe.
“I’m gonna win, of course.” Buck that guano-guzzling grin. It was begging for a lot more than just one punch. “Believe it or not, I already have.”
“Lies!” Blasting forward, I sent him tumbling with a punch.
He didn’t get up, didn’t run, didn’t fight. All he did was grin.
“Get up and fight me.” I kicked him as I got near. “That’s what you wanted, isn’t it? To pick a sunblasted fight!”
“Don’t need to anymore.” Damn that blood-boiling laugh. “I told you—” He gasped as I gave another kick, but it only made him laugh harder. “—I already won.”
“You call this winning?!” Hefting him up by his chest, I slugged him several times; something cracked. “Fight me, you bastard! This isn’t over until you admit you’ve bucking lost! Fight—”
As my hoof descended once more to silence the thrice-damned laughing, somepony caught it in their tempered iron grip. “Enough.”
“No! He hasn’t admitted defeat yet!” I tried in vain to pull, but there was no force save the Nightmare herself capable of stopping Dad.
“Night, stop.”
There was something in the tone and voice. It made me stop, made me listen. The crowd was silent, dead silent—save for a few quiet sniffles. I blinked, and it let me see just what I’d done to Crusty. His face was bruised and bloody as he gave me a broken smile and continued to laugh; he was missing not just one but several teeth.
I stood there, and my chest heaved not just with fatigue, but with anger, rage and a burning desire for more. I wanted— I wanted—
Crusty gasped in pain as I dropped him and stumbled back into Dad’s forelegs. The bully was just barely able to rise and sneer at me, slurring his words as he spoke. “I told you I already won. Go on. Say it. Tell the whole school I won! They all saw it! They saw what you’re really capable of!”
I didn’t dare look at the stands, instead mewling as I curled closer to Dad. His hoof was awkward as he patted me, his body tense. I could hear the rumbling growl trying to claw its way out of his chest.
“Got a quote for you, nerd. Tell me if you’ve heard it~ ‘You either die a hero, or you… you…’” I flinched at the sound of Crusty collapsing mid-sentence, teachers calling for paramedics as he finally stopped his awful laughing.
“‘…or you live long enough to see yourself become the villain.’” Unable to face the school or Dad, I melted into my shadow and ran for home.
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Ouch. I hope this jerk gets what is coming for him, gelding.
Hard to claim that you won the challenge when you’re the one missing half your teeth, asshole.
This is extra, extra dirty. Wonder why he would go this far though. Using trash talks and getting beaten half to death willingly just to humiliate Night? Not worth it. It’s not that he could ever hope to replace her with this performance.
10925313
he didnt...he won a different fight...
The fact that the staff of the school let this get this far, that they allowed a rampant gang of violent thugs disrupt the peace, assault students, and then blamed the victims for defending themselves and fighting back is whats truly disgusting about all this. I would not put it past Finch to have had an active hoof in instigating it all even.
I knew it was going to end badly, I knew she was dancing to their tune, and that this was all a trap for her to hang herself. It was painful to watch her fall deeper and deeper into it. The fact that theres likely going to be 0 repercussions for the instigators after all this is what makes it even more bitter. If the school didn’t step in to protect its students before, they won’t now. Hell they’ll likely throw Night under the bus to cover the whole thing up.
I’m really not expecting any good or happy endings to come out of this honestly, but I can hope.
Now I interrupt this fan fiction to bring you a special message from the Princess of Friendship's voice actress herself!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wzqmvInMsVU
10925446
You think Finch didn't see it was a trap? Why do you think Finch was so adamant Night not go through with the fight last chapter? She said Night was going to regret it. She tried to stop her in her own way. There's only so much Finch can do, though, both about the fight--mostly since Night made it an official duel--and about the incidents she isn't privy to. That's why she was trusting Night to find proof on who did what when they first were called down to her office, and it's why she lessened their punishment for breaking in early and vandalizing the locker. Instead, Night went on a personal vendetta.
10925430
I concur. We need some time devoted to Crusty and his motivations. The willingness to be beaten unconscious to win a moral/psychological victory isn't something that just happens. He was driven. Where does that drive come from?
Nightingale’s mistake was a fundamental one. When you go into battle, you need to know what your objective is.
Remove Crusty from a position of authority? Discredit him enough that no pony follows him in the future? Get him to admit that he coordinated the hazing of innocent students so he would be expelled?
If Night had kept a realistic goal in mind and let that guide her actions, she would not have been caught in Crusty’s trap. “Force someone to say xxxx” or “Force someone to fight” require the other person to comply. The barest scrutiny reveals them to be impossible goals to achieve.
10925667
That’ll probably happen 3-ish ‘arcs’ from now. Like, this fight has long standing consequences, so much so that instead of another part to ‘From the Shadows, They Strike’ I’m just calling that arc here and spreading the consequences out through the next few arcs. In that vein, though this was a school arc and the next arc should address the family/aunt mercy situation, I’m already planning on it being an arc looking into the immediate consequences through how her family reacts. Not even a day is passing. Story is gonna be picking up hours later at most.
And then, after the family arc is a Diamond/guard arc. No scheduled trips to places we haven’t seen. Just much needed interaction between Diamond and Night, maybe mix in some of her other immediate friends.
Then, finally when the circle comes around and its time for another school arch, Beanstalk is gonna show up again for a little talk while Night is suspended. And yeah, the plan for this fight basically goes back that far, or at least, Crusty’s motivations do. There is a reason Crusty’s first target was Bean. I think I mentioned it at somepoint in story, but they aren’t just from Ponyville middleschool. Both of them are first year transfers from another town. It would be easy to gloss over though. For some reason when I’m not as subtle as a sack of bricks I seem to make certain stuff a bit too hard to pick up on.
10925619
But why is it a students job to investigate the nefarious deeds happening at school?
10925730
I can think of a couple reasons for that. First being, this isn't a mystery story, so people don't necessarily have their thinking caps on to ponder anything beyond what details are given to them. Another issue may be the fact that stories like this are written piecemeal, one chapter at a time weeks or months apart, so fine details are lost over time compared to reading a complete story the whole way through. For example, you bring up a character named Beanstalk in the spoiler, and I honestly can't remember any character by that name without going back to re-read previous chapters.
Sooo ... the gang of thugs relying on ambushes and numbers to "take over the school" (their words) and to "punish" Night for daring to leave a sport team somehow achieved a "moral victory" by showing that Night could beat the lot of them if pushed far enough? That her willingness to use old laws to try and force a straight-up confrontation and willingness to beat the whole bunch of them unconscious (when they outnumber her by roughly twelve to one) somehow makes them superior? This somehow makes all of their previous acts of bullying, theft, destruction of property and assault okay?
Yeah ... obviously I'm missing something here.
10925619 Yes, Night broke into school early, Diamond "vandalized" a locker to get Night out. Silver, Button, Sweetie, and the rest did neither (that I can recall), and were still punished for being the targets of the bullies. And then the lot of them were assigned the task of finding out who was behind the attacks by Finch instead of her doing it herself.
10925619
You're saying Abacus was privy to a whole bunch of other extremely relevant information, including that this was a trap to get Night suspended, and probably actual military drama resulting in a guard-trained athlete violently assaulting students...and her response was to both mention absolutely none of this to at least warn her, and be so completely useless at her own job while children were being assaulted as to give the filly she employed to solve the problem in her own place no other option but to walk into it?
Screw it, getting suspended from school at that point is basically a badge of honor. Pin a diploma shaped medal on Night's coat, she's learned all she needs to. You're clearly trying to narratively present Night as having grievously erred, but the events aren't really pointing that way -- the fact that this kid is military elevates him to such a clear threat to his victims, and that the authorities were so obstructive and indolent, makes this probably the most heroic thing she's ever done despite bringing her temper into it. From what we've seen, her taking off and the violent military grade psycho who was attacking students ending up in the ICU honestly seems about as close to Happy End as this can get, short of the school bureaucrat who was all but complicit with the whole thing getting sacked too.
10926038
It isn’t Night’s job, and arguably the fact that Night likes policing the school and has been doing so for all the years she’s been there could have turned out really really bad if she wasn’t as responsible as she is. Every system has cracks, and with some schools, a lot of bullies get away with shit just because the schools cant get proof. If its just the bully’s word versus the bullied, who are they supposed to believe? Or worse, plenty of bullied students may not report being bullied thinking being a snitch will just get them bullied more.
Night fills in the cracks in the system, and the fact Finch and the other teachers recognize that she is good at doing so is a testament to Night’s skill. But the difference here is Night was personally targeted. Finch was hoping for the same sort of professionalism, and got a massive public fight instead.
10926354
Diamond said it herself in this fic didn’t she? The school WON’T atop a bully, after all they didn’t stop her. So we have a school that won’t lift a hoof and actively punishes victims (scoots) and a student who has been picking up their slack for years. Thats not cracks in a system, thats major holes in the foundation. That Night gets to be labled the ‘bad guy’ for cracking under the weight of doing what should have been done by the adults in the industry should have been doing for years is what upsets me.
And I can admit, maybe my passion on this subject is biased. But I can tel you as someone who was a victim of EXTENSIVE bullying for most of my formative years its little god damn comfort to be told that was all just ‘a crack in the system’. Its a massive gaping hole I was stuck in for years that at one point had me suicidally depressed.
If I were to have been lucky enough to have even a single person willing to stand up to violent bullies who, in the context of this story, assault a physically handicapped child (Scoots again, though I admit I can’t remember if she can fly or not in this canon), would be jumping up and down in the stands cheering for Night as she walks away bloody.
12 to 20 to one odds, she came out on top, against a gang that was trash talking her the entire time. If Finch knew what was going on and said nothing more than vague warnings of ‘don’t do this’ then she might as well have done nothing. If she was shunting responsibility onto a student for the wellbeing of the school to cover up their flaws, and she had information that could help and didn’t explicitly state it, then thats as good as aiding the bullies. Don’t you think things would have been different if she said. ‘This is a trap, they want you to violently beat them all in a public setting so the school becomes afraid of you’ is it not reasonable to think that Night would have approached the challenge differently?
I’m sorry but I can’t see how this isn’t the fault of the establishment that fails to protect its students and then justifies its lack of action on ‘well we have this one child thats pretty good at keeping order so we’ll just keep hoping that takes care of the problem forever’. If Luba were to be made aware of what was happening I have a feeling the skies would darken and peels of thunder would scare the school administration straight and get them to actually do something, anything other than hope the children sort themselves out.
10926236
Generally speaking, when I write these sorts of scenarios to show Night's flaws, it's never with the idea she's solely in the wrong. It's almost always more compelling and interesting when a character is both right and wrong. It feels more real and fleshed out, it draws readers in, and in general it tends to be much more real when things aren't black and white. If you think I wrote this solely to punish Night or make her 'wrong' from my comments, well, a large part of how I respond to readers when these things comes up arises from how many comments seem to act as if Night can do no wrong and is always in the right. It happened when Rumble had a crush on her. It happened in the beach episode when she recklessly risked her life and dove after Sweetie with little more knowledge in free diving than how to handle pressure, and it seems to be happening here with how so many folks are calling for Crusty and Finch to get punished but not acknowledging that regardless of Crusty and Finch, Night let things get way more personal than we've ever seen from her. She often prides herself on staying professional and detached, and she bucked up on that here.
She is in the wrong just as much as she's in the right for defending herself. At the very least, she's wrong because having seen how much her control slipped she thinks she did wrong. Perspective is important here, and so a lot of the next few arcs I plan on dealing with not just how she views the fight but how others do too.
10926464
Well, I'm sorry if calling it a crack in the system offends you. I'm not saying things shouldn't be different. I'm just clarifying exactly why I wrote it as I did. It's real to write it as I did. It resonates more. You and your responses are proof of that. I may not have been bullied, but I do know what it's like to fall between cracks in the system, and well... would you feel such passionate support for Night here if she just breezed in and dealt with Crusty like he was nothing?
Every characters actions and reactions was carefully considered here, including Finch's. Finch is a control freak, but she also almost religiously adheres to the rules she and others above her sets down. Night acting around said rules is both a blessing and curse for her. It means miscreants she wouldn't be able to catch because of holes in the rules are dealt with, but it also means Night is a wild card she doesn't know how to deal with. Finch likely wants more control and power to deal with bullies like Crusty, but the fact she doesn't have it has little to do with her. She would be an iron hooved tyrant if she could, something I seem to have at least succeeded in making clear given how everyone seems to love hating her.
The funny thing is, though... She doesn't have that power. The rest of the school--the parents, the teachers, her bosses--deny her that kind of power by taking on a kinder approach to teaching and learning. Defending Finch here for me is less about defending her actions and more about the fact that Finch would clearly ground anypony violating the schools order to dust if she could. The fact that she can't and that the cracks are as wide as they are is arguably the fault of everypony but her, hell, she probably absolutely hates knowing the cracks exist. She's exactly the type who would demand things like uniforms, cameras in every hall, and whatever else she thought was necessary to enforce order and uniformity. The fact such things don't seem to be in place isn't on her. It's on everypony else who has a say in how the school operates. She's just the Head of Discipline, nothing more, nothing less. She has some say, but if she can't convince ponies her ideas are necessary, how the heck is she gonna fill in those cracks?
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It's not even that she can do no wrong, it's that the wrong she's doing is so outclassed by more egregious offenses as to be morally irrelevant. She started investigating out of spite and started a duel out of spite because Abacus is a useless lump and there was basically no other solution. She started the fight with her head clearly not in the right place but still dutifully pulling punches while fighting 1v20, then went berserk on Crusty after he clearly showed military chops, which instantly escalated the stakes so far beyond a vendetta that any offense she could've committed that still left him with a pulse became superfluous. If he really was just Some Jock Being An Asshole that'd be one thing, but that moment repainted everything that happened before from schoolyard bullying to the pony equivalent of an ROTC waving his rifle at classmates for weeks. This suddenly went from an ill-advised but probably necessary grudge match, to a full on tragedy waiting for a place to happen that just got nipped in the bud.
I get that you're going for gray, and Night's temper and vindictiveness very much begs for gray. But there's a point where one side is so out of proportion that gray stops coming across.
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How is it waving a rifle around from what was shown? Beyond Crusty having a fancy trick that let him charge forward with a blast of wind, what else did he actually do besides throw a few punches and taunt Night? Remember that the Junior Guard does exist, and that in Just a Little Batty it was shown to include basic sparring and even quarterstaff fighting with maybe more in the later years we didn’t see. The most basic of basic guard training is available to anyone much like how anyone can sign up for martial arts classes growing up. What he did could be akin to waving a mid to high tier martial arts belt around, perhaps, but a gun?
I never detailed how trained he was nor how advanced his technique was. It wasn’t important. Night would have responded the same way to basic or advanced techniques. The idea of somepony abusing any guard training no matter how small is so anathema to her as to merit that same sort of beserk rage with how worked up she already was. If anything, Night was throwing so many of her special tricks out just to win the fight that she was the one waving the gun around. Her personal training goes far beyond what anypony who picked up a trick or two in the Junior Guard would learn.
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There's a big difference between hobbyist/sport martial arts and military martial arts. If a schoolyard bully whips out something like sport karate on a classmate, that's an art that's pretty watered down -- and I don't mean that as a pejorative, but that it's fundamentally not about murderizing your opponent, both in thematic internal discipline and in what kind of strikes you're likely to learn. It's dangerous, but not likely to leave lasting damage because it's designed not to. If a bully whips out something like Krav Maga, that's a lot more alarming. Military arts are not designed as hobbies or sports. They're very rarely available to children at all, even through junior military programs like you'd see in a school. They're designed to subdue, cripple, and kill with extreme efficiency, and even a cocky shit on the playground is a lot more likely to seriously hurt someone -- even if (or perhaps especially if!) they're not actually any good at it -- because the style and mentality are just so much more aggressive.
Crusty throwing around something Night recognizes that clearly as military is a really, really big deal. Because as you said, Night didn't get the kid gloves either, she learned the real thing and knows exactly how much damage it can do. She's good enough at the real thing to hold back and not leave the whole team in the hospital, even when her state of mind is as compromised as it is here. Her using the real thing carries a very different weight than Crusty, who's not only been a sociopathic hellion in general, but whose traps got so dangerous a couple chapters ago that if that water tank hit anyone else they would probably have left the school on a gurney. Someone like that pulling out military techniques? Yeah, that pretty much puts them right below school shooter in my book. I can't really think of a whole lot of other red flags that even exist in this setting for him to set off.
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You can say that Abacus Finch is a frustrated mare doing her best to work within the system, and it can be true because you are the author and know the story before its been published. We don’t, we as readers only see whats on display. Abacus Finch has demonstrated no ‘frustration’ with the bullying problem. Her only appearances so far has been punishing the victims of bullying and not explicitly doing teling Night shes falling into a trap resulting in the travesty that occurred. It doesn’t help that Abacus Finch in canon is know for being cruel and manipulative. Even in AU it puts the reader more on guard. If this were anyone else or an OC then perhaps we’d be a little more willing to give her the benefit of the doubt. But nothing we’ve seen as readers has shown she has any level of empathy or understanding or even care for the victims of the bullying going on. And if we the readers can’t see or pick up any hints of such intentions, then regardless of what you had planned for her as a character they don’t functionally exist. We can only judge her character based on what we’ve seen, and what we’ve seen paints her as almost exactly like her equestria girls movie counterpart, maybe even worse since she was actively punishing and blaming the victims.
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Those were her explicit words to Tempered directly in front of Night in the office. Not a direct warning, but it came before any punishment for the intercom. Yes, she is a jackass. I played that hard, but it would be distinctly out of character for her to be nice and sympathetic to Night. She gave warning and tried to stop Night in her own way by appealing to an authority figure she figured was capable of stopping Night, and all of my prereaders got that, so at this point, I really don't know what you want me to say. Most of the prereaders aren't privy to my inner plans and thoughts to keep their perspective fresh, and they all said Finch's motivations and actions were clear to them. Sure, they thought she was a bitch, but they saw the more subtle stuff I was lacing into her actions. If you didn't see the nuances, you didn't see it, but there's a point where there's not anything I can do other than smack people in the head with stuff which defeats the purpose of a limited first person narrative. Well, I can offer clarification in comments which I often try to do, but this isn't a third person omniscent PoV. It's meant to be flawed or hide information, and I may never get to adressing that information in story because it's not the most important or relevant to the story. That's exactly why I comment on certain stuff. Finch frankly isn't that important a character, but I happened to enjoy examining how and why she would act as she did even if it isn't likely I'll ever have a chance to show it in more detail in story.
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‘You’re going to regret this’ is not the same thing as ‘they are playing you against your emotions’. It is not the same as ‘this is a trap’ it is not the same as ‘you are acting like a fool’
In most contexts telling someone ‘You’re going to regret this’ isn’t a warning, its a threat. I someone were to look at me with angry stern eyes focused like laser beams and tel me ‘You’re gonna regret doing that’ I would rightly assume I was being threatened, not given a helpful warning. Aside from that it also sounds like empty words from a stock administrator unwilling to do anything to help. ‘You’re going to regret this’. Yeah I bet she does regret it. I bet she does regret that students are being physically assaulted, humiliated, hurt and those in power are seemingly looking the other way. I’m sure she regrets that she has to take action because people are hurting students and the school pretends not to see anything. For gods sake they tarred and feathered scoots. Thats unacceptable.
I don't see how he's going to have any credibility in school after that though. Sure, he might think he's won because he played her like a fiddle, but in the process got the crap kicked out of him and his entire team in a many vs one fight. Sure, gives you slightly more street cred (in certain circles, not all) than just admitting he'd lose and forfeiting before the fight started, but by getting him and all his mates beaten up he now looks like a melon to everyone.
He just demonstrated to the entire school that sure, him and his mates can be sneaky, but now everyone knows who they are and they can all get beaten up by one angry mare, which absolutely will invite further reprisals from the other ponies they've been picking on.
I've enjoyed the story so far, but I despise the message of this one. Nothing was going to be done officially. She beat them 20 to 1. I fail to see her becoming the villain here. She's a fucking hero.
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Which message are you talking about? Because the thing it seems some people don't get with this arc is that this fight is only the halfway point for the school arc. She tries. She fails. Eventually, she will face Crusty again in some shape or form, and there is no one final message here since it isn't really an end. It is one conflict acting as a catalyst to lead into several others, namely Night falling between cracks in the school system and Night irrationally blaming herself for losing so much control. Night has always been a character to revel in her own self-control, so of course she's going to be hurt and confused on losing that control to somepony as manipulative as Crusty.