• Published 1st Sep 2019
  • 2,215 Views, 282 Comments

No Longer Living In A Van Down By The River - Peni Parker



Since The Dazzlings agreed to be motivational speakers at CHS they're no longer living in a van down by the river, but the job may make them wish they still were.

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Aria and Applejack

“Fricken Sonata.” Aria Blaze angrily muttered to herself as she traipsed through Canterlot Mall, heading towards the food court. “Sometimes I wish I had replaced her with Scootaloo.”

Up until about a minute ago, Aria had been with Sonata as her sister looked at new dresses, hoping to find one to wear to the meeting they both were going to have with Adagio’s new girlfriend, Raven Inkwell.

Although, Aria wasn’t with Sonata by choice. No, she had been blackmailed by her sister into coming to the mall with her. And as if the act of being blackmailed wasn’t bad enough, it was especially aggravating to her because she’d already committed most of her day to helping Trixie find a new manager after her last one quit, meaning her whole day was pretty much shot.

The mall trip had started off well, but quickly went south as Sonata looked at dress after dress after dress, declaring each one of them to be ‘not cute enough’. Eventually Sonata’s indecisiveness got on Aria’s last nerve and she made a comment about how Sonata was only using the meeting with Raven as an excuse to buy a new dress. Sonata passionately protested her sister’s accusation and the two Dazzlings stared each other down until Aria decided she’d had enough and left to get a smoothie.

“God I hope they have smoothies with alcohol in them.” Aria commented as the food court came into view.

Once she was at the food court, Aria looked over to where the smoothie pavilion was and, much to her unwanted surprise, saw a long line of people in front of it.

“Oh just great.” She sarcastically said as she made her way over to the end of the line.

The line at the smoothie pavilion didn’t exactly move slowly, but it didn’t exactly move quickly either. All-in-all, Aria waited in line for about fifteen minutes before it was her turn to order.

“Finally.” She said to herself as she looked up at the menu, trying to find anything on it that might be alcoholic.

“Welcome ta Rainbow of Smoothies.” A heavily accented, but also familiar, female voice said from behind counter. “What can aah…well howdy, Aria!”

Aria looked down at the colorfully dressed smoothie girl and didn’t quite recognize her, at first.

“Applejack?” She quizzically stated, feeling only about 90% sure that it was Applejack.

“Eeyup.” Applejack replied, almost sounding exactly like Big Mac.

“Huh, I almost didn’t recognize you without your hat.” Aria casually remarked.

“Aah git that a lot.” Applejack amiably admitted. “Aah wear the darn thing so much some folks don’t know who Aah am when they see me without it. So what can Aah git yah?”

Not having seen what she was looking for before, Aria once again turned her attention to the menu.

“Do you have anything with alcohol in it?” She inquired when she still didn’t see anything.

“Uh, no. No we don’t.” Applejack very plainly answered, wondering why in the heck Aria had just asked that.

“Damn.” Aria dolefully uttered before returning her attention to Applejack. “I guess I’ll just have a large pomegranate-berry smoothie then.”

“Comin’ right up.” Applejack said as she proceeded to make Aria’s smoothie in a very dramatic and over-the-top fashion, almost as if she were in some kind of music video.

All Aria could do while she waited was stare at Applejack as she twirled cups into the air and perfectly threw ingredients into them once they landed. The whole scene filled her with a mixture of confusion and awe.

“Here yah are!” Applejack said once she was done, holding a large pomegranate-berry smoothie in front of Aria.

“Uh, thanks.” Aria dazedly replied as she took the smoothie, still trying to process what she’d just witnessed.

Without saying another word, Aria slowly turned around and began to walk away.

“Aria, wait!” Applejack called out to her before she got more than two steps away. “Can Aah ask yah a favor?”

Aria turned around and noticed an almost pleading look on Applejack’s face, something she’d never seen from the country girl before.

“Depends on the favor.” She nonchalantly said back, curious as to what Applejack could possibly want from her.

“Aah’m ‘bout ta take mah break, think maybe Aah could spend it with yah?” Applejack asked with the tiniest hint of embarrassment in her voice. “If yer gonna be hangin’ ‘round the mall fer awhile and it ain’t too much of an imposition that is.”

At first Aria wasn’t sure what to make of Applejack’s request. While she wasn’t opposed to the Applejack spending her break with her, she couldn’t help but be weary why she wanted to do so. In her experience, people usually wanted to spend as little time around her as possible.

“If you really want to.” She answered after a moments thought. “I mean I was just going to hang around the food court, but whatever.”

Just then, Applejack’s face lit up like a candle.

“Oh thank yah, Aria!” The Rainboom exclaimed. “Jus’ find a seat somewhere and Aah’ll be out in sec!”

As Aria watched an elated Applejack disappear into the backroom of the smoothie pavilion, she couldn’t help but wonder if she’d just made a huge mistake. She quickly found a seat and, no more than two minutes later, Applejack reemerged from the backroom and joined her.

“Thank yah so much fer this, Aria.” The country girl said as she took a seat opposite the Dazzling. “Aah can’t tell yah how much Aah hate taken mah breaks alone, so Aah’m really glad fer yer company.”

“Don’t mention it.” Aria indifferently replied just before taking an unusually long sip of her smoothie.

“So, uh, what brings yah ta the mall?” Applejack randomly asked, desperate to keep conversion alive.

“Sonata.” Aria disdainfully answered as she put her smoothie down on the table, with a tad more force than intended. “She blackmailed me into coming here with her.”

“Blackmailed?” Applejack confusingly asked, causing Aria to realize that she’d just admitted to being blackmailed, which then caused the Dazzling to facepalm. “Why in tarnation would yer sister blackmail yah inta comin’ ta the mall with her?”

“Because she wanted help finding a cute new dress to wear for when we meet Adagio’s new girlfriend tomorrow.” Aria bitterly explained as she lowered her hand.

There a brief, uncomfortable moment of silence.

“Adagio’s got a girlfriend?” Applejack eventually asked. “Aah didn’t know she was inta girls.”

“Neither did we.” Aria said as she picked her smoothie back up. “But the other day she just randomly told us that she and Raven Inkwell were a couple now and that she’d be bringing her over to meet us this weekend.”

“Raven’s her girlfriend?!” Applejack shockingly stated, her confusion only growing, as Aria drank from her smoothie. “Aah thought she had a boyfriend?”

“Not anymore.” Aria revealed, taking a break from her smoothie. “Adagio said that her boyfriend dumped her after confessing that he’d been cheating on her.”

“Oh mah gosh! Poor Raven.” Applejack commented, feeling bad for the poor girl.

Since she was still finishing her smoothie, Aria simply nodded her head in agreement.

“But wait, how did Adagio become her girlfriend?” Applejack inquired.

“No idea.” Aria confessed once she’d finished her smoothie. “She just said she learned about the break up from Raven when she was in the front office the other day and then they ended up becoming a couple.”

By this point, Applejack felt more confused than she ever had in her life.

“So, yah don’t even know who asked who out?” She asked.

“Nope.” Aria answered with a hint of sharpness now in her voice. “Just makes me wonder all the more what Adagio’s up to.”

Correction: Now Applejack felt more confused than she ever had in her life.

“What do yah mean?” She asked.

“What do you mean ‘What do you mean’?” Aria curiously asked back. “It’s obvious Adagio’s up to something with all this Raven business, I just don’t know what that something is.”

“B-but why would yah assume yer own sister is up ta somethin’?” Applejack replied, finding it difficult to believe that anyone could be so suspicious of their own kin, even if it was the Dazzlings.

It wasn’t hard for Aria to notice just how confused Applejack was by this whole situation. She knew she was going to have to admit some hard truths, and took a deep breath as she prepared herself to do so.

“Look, Applejack, my sisters and I may no longer be power-crazed villains, but we’re not saints. We still lie and manipulate to get what we want, even from each other. Just look at today, Sonata blackmailed me into coming here with her. As for Adagio, she tried to manipulate Wallflower Blush into letting us move in with her.”

As much as Applejack wanted further details on the Adagio-trying-to-move-in-with-Wallflower story, she felt that it was a story for another time and remained silent.

“And me, I lied to Derpy when I staged a phony bullying scenario in an attempt to get her to stand up for herself. No matter how much we may have changed, deep down, we’re still sirens at heart. Lying and manipulating are just in of our nature, they’re a part of who we are.”

“No!” Applejack suddenly exclaimed as she unexpectedly stood up and slammed her hands down on the table, causing Aria to slightly wince. “Aah refuse ta believe that!”

It took Aria a few seconds to regain her composure as she stared at the now very stern looking Applejack.

“Um, you refuse to believe what?” She inquired, feeling a bit unsure about what it was that Applejack was refusing to believe.

“Aah refuse ta believe that y’all are natural-born liars and manipulators.” Applejack clarified as she retook her seat, but still maintaining her very stern expression and tone.

“Okay, clearly you don’t know anything about sirens, so let me enlighten you.” Aria brazenly replied. “All sirens are liars and manipulators, and that’s because lying and manipulating are considered valuable skills our society. Sirens believe that all life must compete in order to flourish and that the ends justify the means. To us, it doesn’t matter who you use or even hurt so long as you’re surviving.”

As Aria ‘enlightened’ her, Applejack felt a strong sadness overcome her. She couldn’t help but morosely wonder just what Aria and her sisters had gone through growing up in a such a self-centered and uncaring society. Frankly, some of the thoughts that came to mind made her feel ill.

“B-but what about yer family, don’t yah care if yah hurt them?” She despondently asked.

“Yes and no.” Aria answered, a twinge of woe in her voice. “You have to understand that siren families stick together mostly for survival purposes, not because of they love each other, so it’s not uncommon for some families to take advantage of a relative who’s weak or vulnerable.”

Applejack’s heart nearly sank into the bottom of her chest. She simply couldn’t believe what she was hearing. How could such a thing even be called a family?

“Adagio, Sonata, and I may be as close as most families in this world, but by comparison to other siren families we’re like the damn Brady Bunch.” Aria went on. “Regardless though, we’re still sirens, which means we’re liars and manipulators.”

The sadness Applejack had been feeling was now visible as tears began to flow down her cheeks.

“But just ‘cause yer sirens doesn’t mean that yer liars and manipulators.” She countered through her sympathetic tears. “Y’all aren’t defined by the values society tries ta impose on yah.”

Aria opened her mouth to respond, but no words came out. She tried to think of something, anything, to say, but couldn’t. She’d been caught completely off-guard by Applejack’s response.

“Maybe Aah’m wrong ‘bout this, but here’s what Aah believe.” Applejack continued. “Aah believe that no one is born a certain way, that everyone has the ability ta be who they wanna be. Aah believe that just ‘cause yah three are sirens and that every other siren is a liar or manipulator doesn’t mean that y’all are too.”

Much to her surprise, Aria felt Applejack’s words having a profound effect on her. While she’d been told numerous before that she had the ability to be whoever she wanted to be, for some reason hearing it now from Applejack felt like the first time she was truly hearing it. Maybe, it was because it was the first time someone actually believed it when they said it to her.

“Applejack.” She softly uttered, feeling tears of her own coming on.

“Aah’m sure life’s been hard fer y’all, growin’ up the way yah did.” Applejack went on, not having heard Aria softly say her name. “And ta make matters worse, yah lost yer home and then yer magic. Aah can’t even begin ta imagine what y’all have gone through, but Aah honestly believe that y’all don’t have ta lie and manipulate if yah don’t want to, sirens or not.”

Aria could feel the tears begin to flow down her cheeks as Applejack spoke. Normally she’d feel embarrassed or angry about being seen crying in public, but Applejack’s words reached her so much that she didn’t care who saw her cry.

“Aah’ve seen how you and yer sisters have changed, and how yer helpin’ students everyday at CHS.” Applejack continued, barely able to speak through her tears now. “And Aah believe that y’all can continue ta change if yah want ta, so that yah don’t have ta be blackmailin’ and lyin’ ta each other anymore.”

There was still more Applejack wanted to say, but she couldn’t. She was feeling too choked up to utter another word, but she didn’t need to. Without warning, Aria quickly got up from her seat and embraced Applejack in the warmest and friendliest hug she could.

“You know, maybe you should be Canterlot High’s motivational speaker, Applejack.” The Dazzling buoyantly stated through her tears. “You’ve got a real knack for it.”

“Aah don’t know ‘bout that.” Applejack just as buoyantly replied as she returned the hug. “Aah just can’t stand seein’ one of mah friends thinkin’ so negatively ‘bout herself or her family is all.”

The hug didn’t last very long as Aria soon broke it and returned to her seat.

“You’re right, about everything.” She admitted as she sat down. “Just because we’re sirens doesn’t mean we have to continue lying and manipulating. I’m going to have a talk with Adagio and Sonata about that, and I’m going to start it by telling Adagio about the thing that Sonata blackmailed me with.”

“That sounds like a good plan.” Applejack commented as she wiped a tear away with one hand and pulled out her phone with the other, taking a look at the time. “Yah know, Aah still got some time left on mah break, yah maybe wanna walk around the mall fer a bit?”

“Yeah, I’d like that.” Aria answered.

As the two girls got up and made their way out of the food court, Applejack couldn’t help but still be extremely curious about one thing.

“Say, uh, Aria.” She began to nervously say. “Don’t feel yah need ta answer this, but Aah have ta ask; What was Sonata blackmailin’ yah with?”

“I guess I can tell you, so long as you promise not to tell anyone.” Aria casually replied.

“Cross mah heart and hope ta fly, stick a cupcake in mah eye.” Applejack said as she did a series of hand movements, much to Aria’s confusion.

“Um, does that mean ‘yes’?” The Dazzling inquired.

Applejack couldn’t help but giggle a bit before answering Aria’s question.

“Yeah, it does.” She clarified.

Now that she knew Applejack would keep her secret, Aria did a quick double-take to make sure no one else around was listening.

“I accidentally bought an emu farm with the money all three of us have been saving up to get an apartment.” She whispered.

As her brain tried to wrap around what Aria had just said, Applejack stopped dead in her tracks as her friend continued walking.

“Emu…farm?” She asked her.

Author's Note:

So this probably the last time I'm going to write an Applejack story because she is so darn hard to write! Serious props to anyone who regularly writes Applejack stories.

If you have a suggestion for a future chapter let me know in the comments.

The next chapter will feature Adagio and Raven Inkwell...though you probably saw that coming a mile away.