• Published 15th Nov 2019
  • 2,612 Views, 130 Comments

Grasshopper Pie - brokenimage321



Pinkie Pie has a secret. Actually, more like FIFTY secrets.

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Chapter 7

Grasshopper would have buzzed her wings happily--if she wasn’t already in disguise, that is.

“That was a lot of fun, wasn’t it?” she asked the others. All four of them murmured in agreement.

“I especially liked the pancakes,” Luke put in.

Mama scoffed. “We noticed,” she said. “How many plates did you have? Four?”

“Oh, don’t blame him too much,” Danni said. “I had a couple, too.”

“The pie was alright,” Poppy added. “I’m just glad we didn’t have to pay for it.”

The five of them walked, side by side, down the Manehattan sidewalk--disguised, of course. Grasshopper knew they were drawing more than a few dirty looks, but she didn’t care. To her, it felt like she was walking on clouds.

When Rarity had first asked for their help in opening her boutique--via Millie, who had been on shift at the moment--the Hive hadn’t been sure how to respond. Sure, they probably should help out… but this would be their first time travelling so far away! How were they going to handle things, without a convenient hive to retreat to? And what were the rest going to do for food while they were gone?

As it turns out, they needn’t have worried--not too much, anyways. Mama had picked the four most promising Pinkie impersonators--including, to his everlasting pride, little Luke himself--and they had made the trip together. Whenever anyone needed a break, they’d just duck into a convenient bathroom or something, and they’d make the switch there.

The experiment had been a resounding success--especially since, as it turned out, Rarity needed a lot more help with her store than she’d let on. When that same fact started to dawn on all the others, Pinkie--or, to be more precise, Luke--revealed that she just so happened to know a team of four interior decorators that could help out on short notice. And all five of them had discovered that relief, gratitude, and admiration were almost as tasty as love itself.

The interview with the journalist had been the cherry on top, though. One of them at a time had to sit still and answer his questions, while the other four--scattered, in different disguises, throughout the diner--spent their time making jokes at his expense and coming up with even more outlandish answers to his inevitable questions. And then, of course, every few minutes, Pinkie would excuse herself to the bathroom, letting someone else tag in. And, if the journalist noticed that Pinkie always seemed to have a freshly-ravenous appetite after she returned from the bathroom, he politely kept that observation to himself.

Meanwhile, Mama had given the rest of the hive an assignment. They needed to dig a new exit tunnel anyways, since they'd blocked off the old one--and, while they were already doing that, it wouldn’t be too much harder to dig another tunnel to the basement of one of the vacant houses on the outskirts of Ponyville. So Mama had asked everybuggy she left behind to start brainstorming for another new pony or two they could imitate. Maybe a cute little couple? Maybe they could make one of them a unicorn this time, just for variety's sake. And Mama was so fond of the colors mint green and cream… perhaps they could work those in to their designs, somehow?

“By the way,” Mama said, interrupting her thoughts. “Did anyone else notice that Rarity dropping hints about the mirror pool?”

“I did,” Luke chirped. “Good thing they sealed up the tunnel!”

“Even better thing no one noticed you when you forgot to change out of Pinkie that one time,” Poppy cut in. “What happened, did you just forget after you handed her off to me?”

“Yeah,” he admitted. “I got a little distracted by the vending machine in the girls' bathroom...”

“Luke,” Mama said, a warning tone in her voice, “do you even know what’s in those things?”

“No,” he said.

“Me neither,” Mama replied with a smile.

And all five of them broke into a laugh.

Grasshopper grinned to herself, then happily looked around at the others, all of them in disguise as different ponies. Everyone had chosen their own design, but it was clear they shared a lineage: Mama’s brown mane had Pinkie’s curl to it, while Danni had her bright-blue eyes, and Luke--dressed as a little colt--had taken her pink coat, though he’d added a spiky, gold mane to try and look a little less girly. It was all very brave and daring and exciting--exploring a brand-new city with her family, flaunting little bits of the disguise that had made them so successful...

Grasshopper’s smile widened, and she felt a song rising in her throat. Life was perfect. Life was grand. Life couldn’t be better. Not even if—

“Watch out!”

Grasshopper slammed into somepony. She squawked in alarm, he shouted something unintelligible, and both of them tumbled backwards as packages and bags rained down around them.

“Are you okay, mister?” Luke cried as he rushed forward.

“Here, let me help you…” Mama said, beginning to gather up their spilled things.

Danni and Poppy helped Grasshopper back to her hooves, as she shook her head to try and make the world stop spinning.

“Thou shouldst take greater care where thou walkest,” the stallion grumbled.

“Sorry,” Danni volunteered. “We’re visiting from Ponyville for the day, and we—”

“Thou especially, young mare,” he continued heedlessly. “Thou in the front.”

“I know,” Grasshopper said, “I’m sorry, just… got caught up in the—”

And then she fell silent. One by one, the others turned to see what had happened--and, as they did, they too went quiet. All of them stared silently, eyes wide, at the ponies before them.

The six ponies before them were clearly from out of town--way out of town. Each of them--father, mother, and four daughters--were dressed to the nines… or at least to the sevens or eights, in their own, country-bumpkin way. The father wore a wide-brimmed felt hat and a homespun suit with a pressed linen shirt underneath, while each of the mares wore subdued, cotton-print dresses with subtle accents of silk ribbon and lace. This was clearly a special occasion for them, coming out to the big city--and a large part of the reason for that was probably contained in the boxes and bags still spilled all over the sidewalk.

Grasshopper looked at each of the family members in turn. Each of their coats and manes were dull, earthy colors--grays and blues and browns that reminded Grasshopper of nothing so much as the rocks inside their cave back home. But, hiding at the back of the line, cowering behind one of her sisters, stood another pony entirely.

She was dressed like the others, but otherwise couldn’t be any more different from her family. She stared at Grasshopper with wide, frightened, sapphire-bright eyes. Her curly pink mane had been wrapped carefully in a bun at the base of her neck, save for a few loose flyaway strands. She wore a simple blue dress with tiny white flowers printed on it, almost entirely covering her powder-pink coat. And, even though her flanks were hidden by her skirt, Grasshopper would have bet her wings her cutie mark had something to do with balloons.

For several long seconds, both families stared at each other in silence as the traffic of Manehattan flowed around them. Then, one of the farmers stepped forward, her white mane cut short.

"What are you lookin' at, huh?" she demanded. "Come to stare at the out-of-towners?

Mama's eyes widened, and she ducked her head. “ ‘Scuse us,” she muttered, and slipped her way past their challenger.

One by one, the other changelings gave similar, half-hearted apologies, then slunk past the ponies, under the disapproving glare of the farmer himself.

Grasshopper stood rooted to the spot until Luke, already several yards down the sidewalk, turned and gestured urgently at her. Grasshopper snapped awake, then trotted past the family. However, she paused next to the pink pony, then grinned at her.

“You have a beautiful smile,” she said simply.

The pink pony stared at her for another second, then gave her a watery, halfhearted grin of her own. Grasshopper smiled wider, and was about to hurry off after the others--until she noticed something else.

One of the older sisters was watching her. The sister’s gray coat and purplish mane contrasted with her bright green eyes--which were currently in the process of drilling a hole straight through her. Then, her gaze flicked down the street, towards the rapidly-retreating hindquarters of the other changelings, cataloguing the color of Luke’s coat, and the curl of Mama’s mane, and the bright-blue of Danni’s eyes. And, though she didn’t say a word, Grasshopper could see the gears turning in her brain.

Grasshopper gulped then scurried off, back into the anonymous crowds of Manehattan--the best possible environment for a frightened changeling to be…

...or, at least, for a changeling who didn’t have a family as awesome as hers.

* * *

The letter came six weeks later.

Grasshopper was in the middle of counting out change for Cheerilee when the bell over the door rang.

“ ‘Scuse me,” said the gray mailpony--the one with all the muffins, what was her name…?--”but I got some mail for you.”

“Just toss it on the counter,” Hops said, distracted.

The mail stayed where the mailmare had put it for another hour or so, until after Grasshopper was able to get the lunch rush all squared away. Finally, after making sure all the customers were happy, and the counters were clean, and all the display cakes looked as pretty as could be, she turned to the mail. There were two envelopes for her: the one on top was square and white and sparkling, while the other was plain paper.

We got mail? asked Luke in the back of her brain.

"Uh-huh," Hops said, grabbing the sparkling envelope and tearing it open. She scanned the card inside absently.

Who from?

"I dunno," Hops said, tossing the card back on the counter. "Someone in Canterlot. Sounds like they're having a wedding, and want us to come."

That's... nice? Luke replied uncertainly.

"Plenty of love, I'm sure," Hops said, opening the other envelope. Inside was a simple sheet of lined paper, with a short message written in sharp, precise pencil strokes. "We'll just have to see if we can... uh..."

She fell silent, then read the note again. And again.

Something wrong? asked Luke.

Grasshopper swallowed, her mouth suddenly dry. “Go get Mama,” she whispered.

Why? What’s happening?

Grasshopper swallowed again.

“We’re going to have a visitor,” she said. “This weekend.”

What? Luke squawked. Who? Why?

"I dunno," Hops said, scanning the letter one more time. "She says she wants to see how we're getting on in Ponyville."

Who's it from? he repeated, a little note of desperation in his thoughts.

Grasshopper bent down and peered closely at the note, so Luke could read it along with her.

Sincerely, he read slowly, Your sister, Maud.

A pause.

Uh-oh, Luke said.

Hops nodded slowly. "Uh-oh is right," she said.

What are we gonna do? he asked.

"The same thing we always do, silly," Hops said, folding the note and stuffing it back in its envelope. "Bake a cake, write a song, and hope to mellifera no one notices anything strange." She smiled. "Always worked so far."

In her brain, Luke giggled, and, despite the growing worry in her stomach, Grasshopper felt her smile growing wider.

Suddenly, the bell over the door dingled, and Hops spun to face the new customer.

"Heya!" she cried. "Welcome to Sugarcube Corner! What can I getcha?"

Author's Note:

Just to be clear: the intent is that the Hive accidentally created their Pinkie Pie persona as a perfect replica of an existing pony. Yes, it's a little wierd--but it's Pinkie Pie. Things are always wierd.

Comments ( 41 )

Please tell me that's a sequel hook.

A fun little gem to end on.

Wait, Pinkie Pie is still an actual pony? And Maud is coming to see the fake Pinkie thinking her to be the real one?

Hark, there be shenanigans abound!
I really would love this narrative thread to continue in a sequel.

9951750
Yes, in so many words.

The Hive has accidentally created a near-duplicate copy of an actual pony, tough they appear to have gotten her personality wrong--at least according to this little encounter (Why? Because Pinkie Pie, that's why). Maud, however, has picked up on the fact that something is going on, and is coming to investigate.

Huh, kind of expected this to go on longer. Is it getting a sequel? So is Maud a Changeling or does she recognise ‘Pinkie’ somehow (even though Pinkie was with her). At any rate this twist was a little weird, not entirely unexpected, but still kinda weird.

Oh, no... Maud is suspicious... Maud is coming... And so’s the Wedding...
...Unless something major has changed, when the... *ahem* Curling stone hits the wind turbine (hope someone here gets that reference), everything’s gonna be FUBAR...

9951780
Explained a little better in this comment:
9951751

And Mama was so fond of the colors mint green and cream… perhaps they could work those in to their designs, somehow?

Well there's a timeline screw for you. Or they'll manage to reinvent two more ponies.

Brilliant stuff, even if the timeline feels a bit screwy, what with the wedding apparently happening after Rarity opened her third boutique. (Well, a wedding is happening. No one said it was Cadence and Shining.) Still a very fun spin on the old "X is a changeling" trope. Thank you for a great read.

I’m confused, I thought Pinkie Oie was a a created disguise if the hive, not an actual pony. How can their be an actual Maud? Did I miss something?

9951835
Added an A/N to try and clarify. Basically, they accidentally made a perfect copy of an existing pony, because Pinkie.

You can't just end there... This needs a sequel with that kind of ending.

I want to see twilight freak out when she finds out about all of this

9951751
I actually figured as much, I was just being facetious. :derpytongue2:

lol imagine the chaos when Twilight finds out.

hopefully Mama can explain everything if she must tell the truth.



hmmm would be funny to read a story where a pair of changelings who lives in Ponyville as the librarians who unknowingly disguised as Twilight and Spike to perfection with all the same quirks etc and well known in Ponyville then the real Twilight and Spike comes who has zero clue why everypony knows em

So in a setting that requires 50 Changelings to make one Pinkie Pie, it turns out that an actual Pinkie Pie also exists. THAT is why events have been happening out of order! Reality has reached Pinkie Pie critical mass! Causality itself is breaking down!

Excellent job on this epilogue. The exchanges, characterizations, general wrap-up and future POSSIBLE sequel set-up are all well done in all the right places. I ESPECIALLY liked the Changelings meeting the REAL Pinkie and her family (and the little nods to a couple of Season Six episodes).

REALLY looking forward to more of your work.

9952222
Get a hold of yourself! It's pretty obvious that the pony!Pinkie of this universe is considerably less... Pinkie than the baseline. It's highly unlikely her presence will disrupt the continuum of Pinkie, and will only create a period of awkwardness. There is NO crisis here!

explosions go off in the background

I repeat, there's no crisis here!

9952209
In other words, basically "Friendship Games" actually set in Equestria. :-D

9951841
I appreciate that you added that. But instead of an author's note or the comments section, the story would be stronger if that was shown to us within its own parameters. Maybe next chapter.

For the record, when we got a character dropping "thou" (and it wasn't Luna), and established 6 ponies dressed weirdly, I was certain you were about to introduce the Pillars of Equestria to your story!

9951821
Involving Lyra and Bon-Bon this way definitely makes the timeline screwy, and raises questions about the Lyra in Canterlot. But I'm also pretty disappointed at the idea that they're not even real.

9951751 Oh man, I thought it was that there was a rival hive impersonating a family of boring rock pony farmers who had somehow managed to survive on ley line energy instead of love, said hive ID'ed them from the meeting in Manehatten, and a drone disguised as Maud was coming to suss them out.

Just finished reading it and I loved it. :pinkiehappy:

An interesting concept that makes sense in its own ways. :)

9951786
As I mentioned a few chapters ago, Mama Pinkie has an ace up her nonexistent sleeve: Harmony's explicit approval in the form of the Element of Laughter that, again, is still hers to use.

9953683
Oh, boy... The issue with that is, what good are the Elements if the Bearers are not bearing them? How do they prove that she is, in fact, the accepted Bearer? Who would trust a known Changeling, as Maud would quite likely expose Pinkie as, either during or immediately after a Changeling invasion?

Meanwhile, Mama had given the rest of the hive an assignment. They needed to dig a new exit tunnel anyways, since they'd blocked off the old one--and, while they were already doing that, it wouldn’t be too much harder to dig another tunnel to the basement of one of the vacant houses on the outskirts of Ponyville. So Mama had asked everybuggy she left behind to start brainstorming for another new pony or two they could imitate. Maybe a cute little couple? Maybe they could make one of them a unicorn this time, just for variety's sake. And Mama was so fond of the colors mint green and cream… perhaps they could work those in to their designs, somehow?

LYRA AND BONBON

9953043

Believe it or not, it didn't occur to me how to do that until after you pointed it out.

"Well, yeah, that would be ideal, but it'd be really hard. I'd have to do something like, I dunno, call attention to it in the narration, and then... oh. Huh."

I may go back and change it now :)

There’s some unfortunate implications about Luke’s lifespan given that Grasshopper never mentions her own drone father in any capacity and the impression is given that’s she’s never even met him.

9957299
I've been basing changeling biology in this story on IRL bee biology. IRL drones, well... let's just say they die happy.

However, if I ever get around to a sequel, I'll address that more explicitly.

Did you think about a sequel? Maybe for when Discord appear, for when they visit the Pie Family, for when Chrysalis and Sombra appear, the alicornification of Twilight, Tirek, and Thorax. Those could be hard times for the Pinkie Hive

Readers with colorblindness or using monochrome displays may have trouble.

Despite being unable to see colors in stories and despite your very clear warning to that effect, the rest of your story description is too. Darn. Compelling to not at least try reading it.

*frustrated horse noises* :twilightangry2:

10020631
I'm glad you like it!

If you don't mind me asking, what exactly's the trouble? I May be able to fix it and send you a copy.

10159822
Thanks for the review! I'm glad you liked it!

This needs continuation stupid badly.

For some reason, this is one of my favourite "x is a changeling" stories. It probably has to do with the simple changeling lore that still makes them significantly different from ponies (a lot of stories don't make them different enough or give them way too many abilities). It also avoids overdoing the drama, which prevents the pacing from being too fast.

I'm surprised that this story is so recent. I don't see too many new stories with original changeling lore, since they now have canon lore (which I find too boring to care about).

Readers with colorblindness or using monochrome displays may have trouble.

I can't see the ultraviolet and infrared text. :fluttershyouch:

Wait, how exactly did Maud clock to go searching in Ponyville?

11791193

"Celestia Did It" :rainbowlaugh:

Seriously, I would expect she heard about Pinkie via her growing fame--canon Pinkie gets up to a lot of shenanigans, after all.

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