• Member Since 4th Mar, 2012
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Simultaneously able to type 94 wpm and still take three years to finish a story. If you're feeling generous, throw a ko-fi at me.


Lyra has a secret. She can't wait to tell Bon Bon! 

Bon Bon has a secret. Bon Bon has many secrets, actually. She'd like it if all her secrets remained hidden in the past.

But secrets have a nasty way of coming back when you least expect them.

After an unknown stallion visits the sweetshop, Bon Bon’s secrets come flooding back, and Lyra is swept along for the ride. She's in for the adventure of her life!

Chapters (22)
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Comments ( 90 )

So basically an adaptation of Lyra & Bon Bon and the Mares From S.M.I.L.E. right?

I haven’t read that book, so hopefully there’s plenty of differences! :scootangel:

What a strong first chapter! You've definitely got my attention; can't wait to see where you take this!

Well, that got dark in a hurry.

“Alright, Sweetie Drops,” he spat. “We can do this the easy way, or the hard way.”

A moment later, he was clucking like a chicken.
Bon Bon blinked, her mind still worrying at half-formed contingency plans. "I... What?"
"I did graduate from Celestia's School," said Lyra. "So, you were serious about Sweetie Drops?"

“Bon Bon, that kills ponies,” Lyra whispered.

That is easily the darkest reference to that video that I've ever seen.

Definitely starting out strong. I look forward to more.

“Bon Bon, that kills ponies,”

You would know, Lyra. :twistnerd:

Unless you're secretly some kind of cragodile hunter?”

So, Scootaloo's dad then? :scootangel:

A targeted assassination of the old gang? Well I guess now it's a question of which old foe had an ax to grind and the money to put out a hit? :twilightoops:

...you haven’t read ahead, have you? :trixieshiftright:

Well, when it's a tale of murder and subterfuge, it makes sense that Las Pegasus is going to err on the dark side as well.

I see what you did with that passphrase. Nice touch.

Lyra leaned down to Bon Bon’s ear. “Bon Bon, you have very strange friends,” she whispered.

"You are one of my friends, Lyra."
"Yeah, and I went to school with Twilight Sparkle and lived to tell the tale. Your other friends? At least that strange."

In any case, we have our cast and a deadly mystery for them to solve. This should be all kinds of fascinating.

As I've been saying, CSGU graduate from the same class as Twilight. Do not underestimate the mintpone.

Mind you, it'll take a lot more than a well-timed ceiling collapse to get out of this.

This is shaping up to be a great little action spy narrative. I'm curious to see where you'll take this.

Information on how to survive torture? That's going to come in handy, I just know it. :twistnerd:

“She’s dead,” Bon Bon said flatly. “Along with all the ponies that went down there.”

They're only dead if you see the bodies, otherwise it could be anyone's guess what happened. Secret agents have ways of faking their own deaths.

He cut off the nearest mercenary’s attempted explanation. “I don’t want apologies; I want results!”

"Sir, I was just trying to answer the question."
"I don't want answers; I want results!"
"Then why did you—"
"Backtalk isn't a result, Cannon Fodder."
"Mom never did forgive me for pressing against her bladder so much..."

In any case, with our duo flying blind, I wonder if Bon Bon will consider calling her local princess. Probably not, but the options there... once they make it back to Ponyville.

It was the equivalent of four simultaneous small nukes. I think they're dead.

Granted, undeath is a possibility. They did mention vamponies earlier...

Interesting. I wonder what Lyra has been wanting to tell Bon Bon this whole time, and if seeing the mare she used to be in action will change that.

I've got to wonder why Bon Bon took Lyra with her in the first place. With how she's depicted as thoroughly practical in matters of survival, I'd think she would want to keep Lyra out of this whole mess if she could; given that nopony alive knew Lyra had stumbled upon the initial scene, it would have been reasonable to just tell her to "stay in Ponyville and pretend you haven't seen me today". The only reason Lyra is on the hit list now is because Bon Bon took her along.

9786015 I assume Bon Bon feared that leaving Lyra in Ponyville after the first attempt would risk someone else trying to target Lyra to lure her out. She thinks that if she keeps Lyra with her, she can prevent that.

Bon Bon thinks fast. Lyra really needs to learn to account for that.

Having finally gotten around to reading this, I can finally say yes.

"In the Bene Gesserit sisterhood, we have a saying: never judge someone dead until you have seen their body... and even then mistakes can be made."

You know, if they were in Canterlot, why didn't they think to maybe call on Lyra's old friends? They could at least get word to Twilight, who could pass word along to Princess Celestia.

At some point, the bounty hunters may need to ask if this mate is really worth it. Of course, between fresh supply and professional pride, anypony who decides to seek an easier payout will be more than replaced.

And I'm honestly surprised that malicious fey can found this close to Canterlot. You'd think they wouldn't dare drown Celestia's subjects right outside her figurative front door. I suppose the theory is she won't boil a lake that close to home.

Indeed. Unless Moondancer turned to bounty hunting to pay for her ninth degree, they should be fairly safe bets.

Granted, we can't completely rule out that possibility...

9789870 Well, Bon Bon is worried about royal guards being in on it. No telling how deep the rabbit hole goes. And as the old saying goes "Trust nopony".

You’d think, right? But Bon Bon isn’t good at trusting. Her training also emphasized how important it was that civilians don’t find out about the masquerade, so she’ll hesitate before bringing in anypony who doesn’t already know.

SEMHA getting shut down wasn't exactly widely announced. Most monsters are perfectly happy to maintain the masquerade, SEMHA or not. But some have noticed that the visits and appearances have been getting pretty rare recently, and they're starting to get bolder. And most kelpies are good at making these drownings look like 'accidents'. Accidents lead to fewer ponies come to the water, and that's really all they want.
That said, he's also a younger kelpie, not great at planning ahead (it didn't occur to him that the mare who knew what he was would also know how to handle him).

Okay, the buildup is nice and all, but WHAT WAS LYRA HAPPY ABOUT AAAAAAAAAA

Fleur as a vampony? This world gets weirder and more dangerous by the chapter. :twilightoops:

Vamponies are neat and all, but what about the greatest monster of all… man? :trollestia:

This story is starting to raise questions about why SEMHA was disbanded. I mean, a murderous kelpie just left to prowl within the capitol's city limits? Clearly there's a material pony cost to SEMHA being inactive. The conversations with Fleur imply that SEMHA had policing duties over the various more monstrous citizens; who, if anybody, has picked up these duties in the absence of SEMHA? It seems mighty suspicious that a single incident could force an agency with such important duties to shutter. Was the disbandment of the agency perhaps orchestrated? Perhaps by someone who has now decided to finish the job to be sure that it doesn't come back?

Curiouser and curiouser. At least the duo has something of a safe haven at the moment. For given values of "safe."

Also, I guess they really are just best friends. For now, anyway. Though it's not like Bon Bon can afford closer emotional bonds while the marehunt is still going on.

Also, fascinating pieces of monster lore. A few thoughts:
• I can't help but think that Derpy is actually a well-meaning djinni who does the monkey's paw routine entirely by accident. (She was summoned for most of Season 3 and no one's been willing to touch her bonded muffin tray since.)
• That is certainly the most unique take on ghouls I have ever seen.
• I only just noticed the likely Frankenstein influence in revenants. (Assuming I'm not reading too much into things.)
• Thank you for the mental image of using laser pointers to distract sphinxes.
• Blixes (blices?) are a fascinating family of monsters. I especially like the Thriller/Necrodancer flavor of the viviblix. Though I can't help but notice there's no data in the provided excerpts about the lectoblix. I wonder if that was intentional or not...

You mentioned that you'd never read the chapter book. I think it's informative for people to know what it contains, particularly shippers. Although most of the events are divergent from this story, the one thing it has in common is the two of them repeatedly referring to each other as "best friends" with audible quotation marks. (The story starts out on Hearts and Hooves Day. With the two of them hanging out for their yearly Hearts and Hooves Day ritual. It goes way beyond subtext; LyraBon is official canon, the higher-ups at Hasbro just won't let the writers spell it out.)

No one said who the vampony was attacking. Or whether she was being attacked.

In any case, rather brief chapter, but it certainly got things moving. Downtime's over, girls. On to the next objective.

And Lyra's left alone. This could go very poorly indeed...

In the back, Bon Bon looked up from her stack of baking pan{s} and put on her best ‘surprised’ face. “You can’t be back here,” she said.
You're You know exactly why I’m back here,” he said, leveling it {what is "it"?} at her, “Special Agent Sweetie Drops.”
“I’m afraid I don’t.” She picked up the pan and spun it over her hoof. “But please, tell me more about it.”

Sorry, old habits. :twilightsheepish:

Nice catches, thanks!
‘It’ is the knife he just hit the lamia with.

Well, the good news is that she'll probably be reunited with Lyra soon. The bad news is literally everything else.

I wonder what Bon Bon is going to say when she hears about this. I can't imagine she'll approve.

“It's… urgent,” Lyra said. Her face scrunched, suddenly realizing that she did not know how to express this so Fleur could understand without letting everypony else know.

"It concerns a mutual friend, one we met with this morning."

In any case, Lyra has Meat Loaf beat. She really would do anything for love. Wonderful to see her Canterlot experience shine.

Lyra squeed. Maybe this wasn’t so bad, after all.

You just nail her personality! The Photo Finish jailbrake is absurd of course, but it’s exactly the sort of thing that happens in this cartoon world too.

Eh, finally! Go Lyra! Also, wow, Photo Finish was totally the best choice for a pony to bamboozle the guards.

Sooner or later Bon-Bon's going to meet a threat she isn't crazy prepared for. Sooner or later Lyra's gonna have to stop being the load and start learning how to handle herself so Bon-Bon doesn't have to constantly save her from danger.

Crooked royal guards? Well, there are worse enemies that could've found her.

I get the feeling Fleur isn't telling the whole truth. In the world of secret agents, you never truly can trust anyone to keep their word 100%.

Cudos to Lyra for finally saying what was on her mind! Though now they need to figure out how to end the hit on Bon Bon. Secret agents in romantic relationships usually end in tragedy. :ajsleepy:

“Super mega best friends?” Bon Bon tried.

"How can you know twelve ways to kill a pony with one hoof and not get this?"
"... Front or back?"

In any case, fantastic jailbreak. Got to love Photo's sheer, unbridled audacity. Also, nice use of the Snapshots. Now there's just the matter of... well, everything that was going on before the jailbreak. At least both mares have something to fight for now.

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