Secrets

by bahatumay

La Maison de Fleur

The sun was setting over Canterlot when a small metal hook flew up, looped itself around the metal fire escape, and cinched itself tight. With a few subdued grunts of effort, a cream-colored earth pony pulled herself up and over the railing. After waiting a few moments, she pulled on the rope, hauling up a seafoam-green unicorn.

Once she was safely aboard, Bon Bon reached into her saddlebag, pulled out something that she stuck on the window, and then slid it open.

Lyra grimaced as she followed Bon Bon inside. “I really hope you’re good friends with this pony?” she started.

“We've crossed paths a few times, usually on good terms,” Bon Bon murmured. “She’s currently known as Fleur de Lis.”

Lyra squeaked. She knew that name! Everypony knew that name! “We broke into Fleur de Lis’s house?!”

“Yep,” Bon Bon said simply, fumbling for a light switch.

Lyra looked around. “Why would we do that?” she squeaked. “She’s a supermodel, she’s probably got all kinds of security-”

“Yes,” Bon Bon said, finding the switch. “But she’s also one of Canterlot’s-”

She found the light switch, and flicked it on. Lyra shrieked and tripped backwards, falling on her hindquarters, as she saw the pony in question standing not two paces in front of her.

“-resident vamponies,” Bon Bon finished coolly.

Now exposed, Fleur straightened up and inclined her head. “I see my fame precedes me,” she said in her gentle accent, wearing a playful but somewhat predatory smile on her lips. “To what do I owe the pleasure of your visit?”

“Infamy, more like,” Bon Bon corrected under her breath. She nodded tightly. “We need your help.”

“Help?” Fleur asked, arching an eyebrow. “The stories are true. You are a bold one.” A little smile perked up one side of her lips. “I’m listening.”

“We’re being chased and need a place to stay, at least for the night.”

Fleur's eyes widened dramatically. “Dear me, am I hearing this right? Is Sweetie Drops, famous agent of SEMHA, asking me for help?”

Lyra glanced over. Apparently, Bon Bon’s fame preceded her, too.

Bon Bon's eyes narrowed and she scowled at nothing in particular. “Yes,” she hissed through gritted teeth.

Fleur’s eyes widened briefly, but her expression quickly returned neutral. “This is a fascinating turn of events,” she murmured.

Lyra's eyes flicked back and forth, not liking this dynamic at all.

A little smile poked at her lips. “You'll owe me a favor,” Fleur said pleasantly.

Bon Bon nodded tightly. “I’m well aware,” she replied.

There was a brief pause.

Fleur brightened and smiled, though Lyra noticed she didn't show her teeth. “Well, then, welcome to La Maison de Fleur! If you're to be my guests tonight, I suppose it would only be right to feed you.” Fleur trotted over to the kitchen. “How does a light salad sound?”

Lyra's stomach growled at the mention of food, even if she was a bit confused. “You can eat?” she asked. “I thought… I mean…”

Fleur chuckled as she lit her horn, pulling over plates and utensils. “Vamponies do eat, you know.” She gestured with her metal fork. “Please, take a seat.” She turned back to the kitchen. “Like ponies, our bodies need nutrients and proteins other than what blood can provide. I’m especially fond of hay fries, but I can never eat them in public.” She tossed her mane and lifted her muzzle high. “My image, you know.”

“But she is lactose intolerant,” Bon Bon whispered as she clambered onto the barstool. “All vamponies are.”

Lyra grimaced, and her tail flicked uncomfortably. That did sound unpleasant. She found her eyes drawn to Fleur's hindquarters, knowing some of the effects (and remembering that awful sleepover where Lemon Hearts had forgotten her pills; nopony had slept well that night and Lemon had almost become Twilight's unwilling test subject for flatus-containing corks).

To her horror, Fleur noticed her looking. She looked back over her shoulder and posed elegantly, wearing that little smile (which did not reveal her teeth) she was known for. Lyra smiled back shakily, not wanting to anger her by either looking away or staring too closely.

Fleur posed again, tall and elegant, looking over her other shoulder coyly.

And then she changed poses once more.

Lyra blushed and quickly averted her eyes. This really was a nice bar, probably marble. And tails were not supposed to be carried that high in public!

Fleur chuckled lightly behind her as she kept chopping. Lyra looked around, admiring the kitchen. As she kept looking, she noticed that all the tools on the wall and on the counters were metal, none were wooden. She found herself remembering some of the novels she’d read and wondered how many of those ‘weaknesses’ were real.

Apparently, Fleur de Lis had been a chef in a previous life; it wasn’t long before Fleur slid a plate in front of them. It was a lovely salad, with fresh tomatoes, chopped cucumbers, and for a dressing-

“Is that garlic?” Lyra asked, her previous thought process derailing.

“Lemon garlic,” Fleur nodded.

“Miss de Lis is one of our older vamponies,” Bon Bon explained as she doused her salad in the dressing. “Garlic doesn’t really affect her anymore. It’s mostly the new ones just getting used to their new, ultra-sensitive sense of smell that it works on.” With a small smirk, she reached into her saddlebag, and pulled out a small foil packet.

Fleur’s eyes narrowed ever so slightly as she tore it open. “Still as pragmatic as ever, I see.”

Bon Bon shrugged as she emptied the entire packet of crushed red pepper onto her salad. “Well, since the last mark on your file is you draining a SEMHA agent nearly into a coma, you'll excuse me if I don't let my guard down completely.”

It was almost like she was taunting her. Lyra didn’t think this was wise, especially since they were here asking for help.

But Fleur de Lis seemed unoffended. She tutted and shook her head. “If you’d read my file, you’d know I’ve been a good little vampony, aside from that little incident. I haven't fed to death in over a century. Besides, that was years ago.” Fleur sighed dramatically. “Then again, I suppose it's only fair,” she conceded, twirling her fork. “Though in my defense, he did find it necessary to attempt to take a picture under my tail, and without permission, at that. I just found myself so… riled.”

Bon Bon snorted. Lyra had to concede that she wouldn’t like somepony looking under her tail without permission, either. But there was-

Her ears tinged red and she quickly shoveled a bite of salad into her mouth. Her eyes brightened. It was delicious.

Fleur chuckled demurely. “Good, isn't it, little one?”

Lyra nodded.

Bon Bon offered Lyra another packet of red pepper, but Lyra, not being a fan of spicy, shook her head. Bon Bon pursed her lips, but didn't push it.

“And I certainly don't go around hunting like I used to. I’ve only been with one partner for the last few years. I make sure to take… good care of him.”

Lyra blushed at those implications.

Fleur noticed and laughed at this, a true laugh this time. “Oh, my precious unicorn, vamponies aren’t that much different than normal ponies, aside from our stunning good looks and our longevity. We enjoy the more…” She sighed deeply. “-carnal pleasures of life, too.”

“What she does is she’s learned to control her desire to feed,” Bon Bon corrected quietly. “Keeps her fed and off the SEMHA radar. It’s a win-win.”

“Just a little bit of blood at a time,” Fleur confirmed as she lifted another forkful of salad. “Fancy Pants doesn’t even notice. It makes it so much sweeter every time I do.”

Lyra looked down. She quickly decided she would not like to be on the receiving end of that.

Their salads soon were finished, so Fleur stood up and began washing the dishes. Lyra and Bon Bon retired to the sitting room, and Bon Bon checked on her equipment saddlebags. Her lips pursed. Apparently, she didn't like what she saw.

“Running low?” Lyra asked.

Bon Bon shrugged. “Yes and no,” she said. “Plenty of salt, couple more pepper packets, couple firesticks, a few silver blades, a flashbang, and a dragon whistler; but not a lot else against normal ponies or anything else who isn't silver sensitive, and I still don't know who or what is chasing us.”

Lyra looked up. “Maybe we could bring Fleur as a bodyguard,” she joked.

Fleur looked back at Lyra, cracking a smile. “Tempting; but I have prior commitments. Fancy Pants is hosting a dinner party I simply must attend tomorrow, and I can't have… blood on my hooves.” She smiled at her pun. “You understand.” And she ran her tongue along the front of her teeth, revealing-

“Ha!” Lyra pointed. “You do have fangs!”

In the blink of an eye, Fleur darted over to stand not even a pace in front of Lyra. She was fast, faster than she appeared. She smiled widely, teeth apart, showing them off. They glinted in the light. “Of course,” she said softly. “Tiny, and sharp. And very effective. Nopony even feels a thing.”

Lyra leaned back in an attempt to put some distance between them, but found herself up against the coffee table.

The fact that Fleur licked her lips didn’t put her at ease. “I do love unicorns. I find their blood especially delectable. And you, little one… you smell wonderful. I don’t suppose you’d be interested in a… generous donation?”

Bon Bon stepped in front of Lyra, going nose to nose with Fleur. “No deal,” she growled.

Fleur exhaled. “Spoilsport,” she said, pushing out her lower lip to extreme proportions and pouting.

“She’s gonna bite you instead!” Lyra whispered.

“She knows the capsaicin in my bloodstream will make my blood unpalatable,” Bon Bon whispered back.

Fleur pursed her lips. “Oh, Special Agent Sweetie Drops, where is your legendary trust of us poor monsters?”

“There's only one unicorn here I trust, Fleur, and it's not you, miss ‘I-don't-go-around-hunting’.”

Fleur chuckled lightly and turned around. “Very well. Since my house is yours tonight, I'll make up the guest room.” She audibly smiled. “And feel free to shower.” Her voice grew slightly strained; apparently her sense of smell was still plenty sensitive. “Please.”

---

Bon Bon showered first. Lyra found herself wishing the shower were large enough for two ponies.

Especially since Bon Bon wouldn't leave Lyra alone until she had given her the remaining flashbang grenade, showed her how to use it, and instructed her in no uncertain terms to pull the pin the instant Fleur did anything sketchy.

Thus it was that the two unicorns sat in the living room, Fleur in a chair and Lyra on the couch, with Lyra holding a grenade awkwardly on her lap.

Lyra gestured weakly at it. “I'm… sorry about all this,” she said.

Fleur shook her head. “Don't be. Sweetie Drops may have a rock's sense of humor, and be about as approachable as a cactus; but she's honorable, and nothing if not fair. Everypony knows that.” She smiled again. “Besides, she’s right. All things considered, I am a dangerous predator.” She lowered her head and looked up through hooded eyes, and let a small smile flicker across her lips.

Lyra nodded hesitantly. It was scary, but at the same time a bit of a thrill.

Fleur smiled comfortingly. “New world, isn't it, little one?”

Lyra bit her lower lip. “Well…”

Fleur nodded. “It was like that for me, first discovering my new abilities and weaknesses—waking up so thirsty I thought I would die, crying in pain from the awful smells in the pantry, walking outside in the middle of the night—realizing that there was a whole new world that I had no idea existed that was hiding in plain sight. Realizing that vamponies are not the only monsters that are real. Realizing there are ponies who train to hunt us, hurt us.” She cracked a wry smile. “Realizing the guardspony I had always hated in the market was actually an ehowolf.” She sighed wistfully. “Ah, good times.”

Lyra considered this, wondering how much of what those novels said was actually real. “So, do vamponies and ehowolves, uh, really not like each other?”

Fleur shrugged. “We are both magical creatures, and our magic happens to be incompatible. The effect is almost, poisonous, I think is the right word. We bite them, it takes forever to heal; they scratch us, it takes forever to heal. Have you ever seen an ehowolf bite? It is not pretty. Our relationship is mostly ‘you stay on your side, and we'll stay on ours’.” She looked off and pursed her lips. “Though I have never met an ehowolf who isn't a complete brute, make of that what you will.”

Lyra’s undying curiosity got the better of her. “So if you were to fight an ehowolf, would you win?”

Fleur smiled, revealing her teeth once more. “Like that is even a question, little one. But one good scratch on my face is all it would take to reduce me from a full frontal model to a flank-and-socks model, and, well, you see what a tragedy that would be.” She lifted her head up, posing again.

She certainly was a pretty pony, Lyra had to admit. “Have you always been a model?”

Fleur snorted, her eyes narrowing. “I was a scullery maid, banished to the kitchens because the mistress of the house did not like the way I caught the eye of the master of the house.” She snorted. “Miserable old bat. I drained her dry.”

Lyra shuddered.

Thankfully, Bon Bon chose this moment to enter, still wearing a towel on her mane. “So, glad to see you’ve both survived.”

Fleur blinked demurely.

Bon Bon rolled her eyes and motioned Lyra to the bathroom.

In the bathroom, Lyra whistled. She had never seen so many beauty products, and had no idea what half these bottles were, and of the ones she did recognize, there were so many duplicates or slight scent changes. Heavenly Citrus as opposed to Tropical Citrus; Strawberry, Melon, and Strawberry Melon, Strawberry Kiwi, Strawberry Banana; actually, whoever the strawberry salespony was, he was certainly good at his job.

She glanced up in the mirror, having sensed a change. Was the lighting a bit off? She squinted at the mirror, trying to see if she could figure out what was wrong. She couldn’t, and looked down at the shampoo bottle again. But something was still niggling at her, something wasn’t right.

Just as she was about to chalk it up to Bon Bon’s paranoia rubbing off on her, she looked over and gasped.

Fleur was standing beside her. She was not showing up in the mirror!

“Try the lavender, little one,” she whispered, slowly backing out of the bathroom. “It's my favorite.”

Lyra closed the door in front of her and reached for the strawberry kiwi scent instead.

---

Lyra sighed as she trotted back to the room. She was freshly bathed, her mane and coat were clean, and she felt wonderful. “I want to keep this towel,” she purred. “So soft.”

“Yeah, she can buy good stuff,” Bon Bon said, tossing one of the blankets over the couch. “Little perk of being alive for a century and a half. Which is why most vamponies deal in favors and promises, not bits. You can have the bed.” She trotted over and slid a nearby dresser against the door as a barricade; then overturned a table (Lyra suddenly noticed that it had been cleared of all its contents) over the window, blocking it. Anypony trying to come in would have to break the window above the table, cutting themselves; or probably knocking over the table in the process of trying to open it. Efficient.
Lyra squinted as something occurred to her. “Bon Bon?”

Bon Bon spread a trail of salt in a semicircle around the window. “I'm not leaving you in a room alone tonight, and I’m not sleeping without a little security.” She climbed onto the couch, flipped her pillow over to get to the cool side (Lyra could see that she had a knife hidden underneath it), and then suddenly realized just how much control she’d taken of the situation. She winced. “Hope you're not too, uh, uncomfortable with me here,” she offered hesitantly.

“No, I… no, not at all.” Lyra climbed into bed. She sighed in exultation and her eyes drifted shut. “Oh, this is nice.” Her eyes opened. “Uh, I mean…”

“You’re fine,” Bon Bon said with a smile. “I chose the couch and it’s plenty comfortable, too.”

“Thanks,” Lyra said quietly. “Good night, Bon Bon.”

“Good night, Lyra.”

Author's Note:

You can read more about vamponies (and other monsters) here.

Comments

[Arkonfleight]

Okay, the buildup is nice and all, but WHAT WAS LYRA HAPPY ABOUT AAAAAAAAAA

[SuperPinkBrony12]

Fleur as a vampony? This world gets weirder and more dangerous by the chapter.

[Thought Prism]

Vamponies are neat and all, but what about the greatest monster of all… man?

[Narrative Style]

This story is starting to raise questions about why SEMHA was disbanded. I mean, a murderous kelpie just left to prowl within the capitol's city limits? Clearly there's a material pony cost to SEMHA being inactive. The conversations with Fleur imply that SEMHA had policing duties over the various more monstrous citizens; who, if anybody, has picked up these duties in the absence of SEMHA? It seems mighty suspicious that a single incident could force an agency with such important duties to shutter. Was the disbandment of the agency perhaps orchestrated? Perhaps by someone who has now decided to finish the job to be sure that it doesn't come back?

[FanOfMostEverything]

Curiouser and curiouser. At least the duo has something of a safe haven at the moment. For given values of "safe."

Also, I guess they really are just best friends. For now, anyway. Though it's not like Bon Bon can afford closer emotional bonds while the marehunt is still going on.

Also, fascinating pieces of monster lore. A few thoughts:
• I can't help but think that Derpy is actually a well-meaning djinni who does the monkey's paw routine entirely by accident. (She was summoned for most of Season 3 and no one's been willing to touch her bonded muffin tray since.)
• That is certainly the most unique take on ghouls I have ever seen.
• I only just noticed the likely Frankenstein influence in revenants. (Assuming I'm not reading too much into things.)
• Thank you for the mental image of using laser pointers to distract sphinxes.
• Blixes (blices?) are a fascinating family of monsters. I especially like the Thriller/Necrodancer flavor of the viviblix. Though I can't help but notice there's no data in the provided excerpts about the lectoblix. I wonder if that was intentional or not...

[Yoshifan30]

“Yes,” Bon Bon said, finding the switch. “But she’s also one of Canterlot’s-”

She found the light switch, and flicked it on. Lyra shrieked and tripped backwards, falling on her hindquarters, as she saw the pony in question standing not two paces in front of her.

“-resident vamponies,” Bon Bon finished coolly.

Huh Fleur is a vampire pony very interesting I wonder if Fancy Pants knew about it and I did remember a story about her when she was the royal guard

[Yoshifan30]

Lyra considered this, wondering how much of what those novels said was actually real. “So, do vamponies and ehowolves, uh, really not like each other?”

You know after the revel of Daring Do Was Real then the shadow Pony and then the legend of the pillars I'm sure most of these things are real