• Member Since 12th May, 2013
  • offline last seen 8 minutes ago

PinkLafter


There's nothing I love more than a good story.

E
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Twilight Sparkle is a curious filly with a little too much time on her hooves. With a busy teacher and a now distant family, a lonely Twilight resolves to make a few friends of her own. But she'll soon find that once started some things have a habit of spiraling out of control.

With a magical journal and a few new friends on her side, she'll stumble across conspiracies, uncover secrets, and find her place in this world. With any luck she'll even make it to graduation in one piece.

Chapters (12)
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Comments ( 54 )

This story feels a bit fast paced, but other that, I think it's pretty good so far...

Yay Sunset and Twilight communicating in the journal when they are younger

Twilight meets 3 new friends
I'm so glad it was Vinyl, Octavia, and Trixie

Twilight meeting new ponies yay, still more ponies to meet

9766554
Thank you kindly for the vote of confidence. I'm currently trying to space important events out more and increase interactions between characters already introduced. Do you think that will help with the pace? I'm just worried that it will become boring if nothing important is happening.

I'm open to criticism as long as it's constructive.

9766778
As an aspiring Friendship Expert, it is her solemn duty after all. Time to make all the friends. :pinkiehappy:

9767492
Of course friendship matters for Twilight :rainbowlaugh:

Twilight I believe you, I think you should tell your friends about this creepy ponies disappearing and the alleyway

ah.... noticing the lings already huh?

9767679
You would think they'd be the last to get spotted, wouldn't you? Somelings have been getting complacent. Still, there are yet more secrets to uncover and not everything is quite as it seems.

9767957
im more mused that canon celestia, who has centuries of body language exp, didn't notice

9768509
Ah, but why send a novice up against a master? Foals are easily dismissed and crowds are great for anonymity. Twilight only sees what she is capable of seeing.

The real question is if Celestia actually does know. A long lived ruler such as her is perfectly capable of having many plans within plans. Whether she does or not though? That remains to be seen.

lyra is like that cause bon is an enabler. don't let her get that bad an ]d she won't.

although now i think moondancer is a ling-ling.and her family as a whole..

9769150
Don't think she is a Changeling, I think she and her family are Luna loyalists even after 1000 years.

9769150
Sometimes you gotta let your friends have their dreams. I'm sure Bon Bon would put her foot down if things ever really went out of control. Friends sometimes gotta compromise ya know.

9769198
Looks like someone's getting the picture. There's a lot going on in the background. The question is, if they are loyalists, what do they believe happened? And do they follow the Nightmare or the Dream guardian, perhaps even both?

She weaved through the crowd with the aid of long practice, darting back and forth among the older ponies with skill born of long practice.

maybe take a second look- you're repeating yourself here. you do it maybe 2 or 3 times.



also, love this chapter. and it's a toss up atm, if the guard are as incompetent as canon, or the ling is just good at his job.

but now that twi has seen a ling undisguised ? games on

9771188
Whoops, sorry about that. I have no idea how many times I've rewritten that part but it was evidently one time too few. Thanks for the heads up! :pinkiehappy:

It makes you wonder, there are a few arguments for either side but the results tend to speak for themselves. In the end I don't think any of the higher ups are gonna be happy about this. Twilight does at least have something to go on now, hopefully she'll be able to put the information to good use. I'm not too sure time is on her side at this point though.

9771395
fair. and the doll enchantment was a good idea. would be useful for the guard though. small little something in the helm, or armor that taps the guard when something is nearby...then double tap when they are looking at the threat. meh...might be too difficult for twi to do atm though.. wonder what tia's reaction would/will be when twilight describes this creature to her

good chapter, and i say twilights enchantment on the doll would be a good thing for the guard in general. im sure there are lings stationed in canterlot all the time. imagine if you could out them like that...

9771647
She'll get there soon enough I think, nothing this studious little unicorn can't handle with enough books and determination after all. The fun will begin when she starts thinking about all the extra stuff she could put in there. Noone suspects the doll. Well, no one that will be believed anyway.

9772590
I'm glad to hear it. I'm rather new to writing and I've always felt judging your own work is a tricky business.

The system would be a complicated one, you can detect hostile intent but there would be missed context. Spotting threats is helpful, but I doubt the citizenry would stand for guards arresting them out of nowhere or keeping a close watch on otherwise unsuspicious individuals. Can you imagine having that knowledge with nothing you can do about it?

Still worth it for the early warning system, but I figure it wouldn't be too powerful with most of the magical enchantments put into physical protection. I suppose they could have different armors to switch out, and enchanted accessories though. I'd speculate more, but well, government secrets you understand.

9772626
true. i always figured, as hard as it might be, the system would double tap if you're looking at the threat. but that might be too complicated to work out.

I’ve always imagined that Oct & Vil are like sisters. Rather that be step or not, to me it felt like that.

Cool, story so far

9772697
While the enchantment is running it sends out a short burst of magic that scans the area for hostile intent within a certain distance. It checks once every ten seconds until something is detected to conserve power. If nothing is found the magic pulses back as no, if something is found it pulses back as yes.

The process could be done, but Twilight would have a much easier time just wearing something with the hostile sight enchantment at the same time. That simply lights up life forms that regard you with hostility in a user determined color.

Certain high ranking guards may have this built into their helmets, I can neither confirm nor deny. It's certainly a much more difficult spell and you need a license to work with it these days thanks to certain aspects of its construction.

9772803
As much as I love them as a couple, theres something heartwarming about the two of them sharing a close sisterly bond despite their differences.

Thank you for the kind words. :twilightsmile:

If Sunset shows up with her own Luna this early? Oh the look on Princess Celestia's face!

9773521
The best part is that everyone will be confused. Not a single one of them have enough information for it not to devolve into chaos. :pinkiecrazy:

Discord: chaos?? and you didn't invite little ol' Dissy? I'm heart broken PinkLafter!!


also, imagine how things go at the wedding, now that she has these necklaces? not counting advancements to them over time

so now MD father is under suspicion... you're enjoying this aren't you?

He isn't a Changeling, he is off to tell his Cult of Lunatics about this possible invasion, so they can think if stopping it, or helping it, would be best for Luna upon her return.

Now I don't know if they want Luna to NNM back, so they could be good or evil still, but not a Changeling.

Ri2

Why doesn't Celestia want Twilight telling the authorities about changelings?

Ri2

Moon Dancer, what do you know?

9778149
A race of shapeshifting monsters hiding among the populace, kidnapping and replacing your citizens. Is that really the sort of information you could let out without causing a panic?

And what would the panicking do really? They're everywhere, ready and willing to perfectly replace anypony. Fact of the matter is, nopony wants to make them take drastic measures. They could be doing so much worse right now, better to keep them complacent. Stall for time.

It's not so much the authorities that don't know. The higher ups in command know what's up. Twilight's guard escort also gets special dispensation. It's just the run of the mill guards that don't get to know for security purposes.

The part about them being a Changeling wasn't important for the overall report, so the bread and butter guards took care of it and Celestia just sent in an amendment and reclassification of the file. Essentially taking a bureaucratic shortcut.

Or at least that's what I may or may not have heard. I'd rather not be charged with treason, so let's just call this informed speculation.

Oh, please, please don't be the one with that damn amulet! That is the last thing they need to deal with right now!

That ending was funny.

However, this whole mess with NNM cultists and Changelings really has me worried Sunset is going to show up with more than a few doppelgangers from her side of the mirror and make it worse for a bit.

9774667
Haha, the invite will arrive eventually. Can't leave out my favourite chaos god can I?
You can hear the sound of stone cracking in the distance. It sends a shiver down your spine.

Yeah, any wedding plans are really unlikely to go Chrysalis's way at the moment. Sadly, Twilight has already garnered her attention with the latest foalnapping failure and Chryssi has not learned how to let go of her grudges. I'm really hoping she learns to make the necklaces actively screw with their disguises. Considering it would work at random intervals with an unclear source. The chaos would be... exquisite.

Keep a watch on that doll though, that's the real wildcard right now.

This timeline is so borked! I have so many questions, what the heck kind of butterfly did this? I'm almost thinking this is the Crystals timeline from Starlight's romp through time, but Sunset's stuff doesn't really work, well baring a Flashpoint love ie "time boom" I guess.

9783214
Ah, I really don't want to ruin it, holding to that mystery angle and all. But I will say a few things.

One, it can indeed all be traced back to one change and the ripples therein, you could guess it now but it would take some pretty spectacular leaps of logic.

Two, part of the reason everything is messed up is because someone or something is trying to fix things.

And Three, communicating through dimensions is hard, hay, it might even seem like you succeeded when really... you failed hard. This is in fact not always a bad thing.

Ah... I may have just created more questions... whoops.

Also, if you try to bring any of this up in an Equestrian court of law I will claim I was merely speculating. Any knowledge I may or may not have and subsequently do or do not use in the defense of Equestria may not be used against me by right of teleportation.

I do love the Luna part with the video games

9786403
Me too, I'm hoping to expand on it in an interesting way later. Hopefully I can manage without detracting too much from the overall story.

early release huh? hmm..

9786426
other guy in the luna part is human dissy isn't it?

9786526
Could I really pass up all that delicious chaos?

9786522
To be honest, this story is something of an answer to a simple question of mine. What would happen if everything that could possibly go wrong, not only went wrong, but went wrong way too early?

Of course, I believe in the magic of friendship, so there's a lot more going on. That and the flow of ka has it's own demands. I just hope I do Discord justice, I have a really interesting take on him that I want to try, but he's also one of my favourite characters and I want that to come through.

I really am too ambitious for my own good.

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