Chapter 6: Hopeless
To Starlight, Sombra was an enigma. As vocally defiant as he was, everything about him was a mystery. His motives, his past, his desperation for power, Starlight hadn’t been able to piece anything together. The fact he was completely absent from History books didn’t help in any way, and she was occasionally struck with the thought that he was just that awful. That he’d always been a heartless monster, bent on obtaining power and hurting others, but that couldn’t be right, could it?
He had shown brief moments of tenderness, if one had paid enough attention. Whether it be playing a cruel little prank by scaring her, or worry that the guards may have harmed her, Sombra had showed some degree of fondness for Starlight. Perhaps it was the fact that she was the only pony that ever talked to him that drove him to enjoy her company.
Right now seemed to be implying the latter.
“How long until the train ride?” He asked, lying on his back and kicking at the air, “I’m so dreadfully bored.”
“Not until an hour after sundown,” Starlight said, scribbling something on a piece of paper. She ignored Sombra’s foalish antics as he groaned in annoyance, kicking the air one last time before rolling onto his belly to sulk.
“I don’t even know when that is,” he reminded her, tapping his mask for emphasis, “Time does not exist when you can’t see it.”
“Well, in that case, I guess we’ll go when we go.”
Sombra sighed, “Can you at least read to me again?”
“Sorry, I returned the book to the library this morning,” Starlight said, to which Sombra groaned again and flopped his head onto the bed, “I can read to you tomorrow after I come home from work if you’d like, Twilight has all of Stygian’s books.”
He flinched back slightly at the mention of the Princess of Friendship’s name, ears pinned against his head in uncertainty. Tucking his legs beneath himself, he curled up where he lay into a protective ball. He made no vocal noise to signify his discomfort at the thought of being near Twilight, but Starlight paused her scribbling to peek at him a moment, wise enough to know he was very obviously uncomfortable.
She stood from her seat, setting her paper and pencil aside to offer, “Look, I know the thought of going to Twilight’s castle scares you, but once we’re there I promise you’ll start to feel better.”
“I am not scared, stop putting those thoughts into your head,” Sombra argued, “I manipulate fear, I do not feel it.”
Starlight rolled her eyes at his denial. Even after all this time, his pride still got in the way of admitting he was afraid. He’d already admit something was bothering him just a few days prior, implying his many punishments had left some degree of damage, but he still wouldn’t admit when he was scared. Was this just a thing with fear magic users?
“You know you’d feel much better about a lot of things if you just talked about it, right?” Starlight asked, “I’m in charge of you, and I’m perfectly okay if you want to talk about it.”
“I said no the first time, and I will continue to say no as long as you continue to pester me,” Sombra hissed back, turning his back to Starlight. She rolled her eyes.
“You’re completely hopeless, I swear.”
Sombra shot up, ears erect in what Starlight could only assume was shock. He was still for a moment, breathing heavy, before a shiver went through him and he let out a choked laugh. Starlight hopped back at the response, something so unlike the Sombra she’d grown accustomed to. It wasn’t an amused laugh, or a bitter one, it was strangled, and almost like a cry of pain.
“You don’t know just how right you are,” He whispered.
What little she could see of his face was obscured by the mask as he flopped back onto the bed with another shudder, covering his muzzle with his forelegs as he curled back up. Starlight stared at him for a moment as he lay there, trying to piece together what had just happened. She’d finally gotten a hint at Sombra’s past, the reason he was so quick to hurt others, and it was more cryptic than she could have ever expected.
Sombra didn’t say another word to her for the rest of the day. Starlight didn’t force him to, knowing fully well it would only make things worse, though her brain buzzed with curiosity and concern over Sombra’s words. She stayed where she sat, only leaving once to grab a snack from the kitchen, scribbling on her papers.
She wrote about what she knew about Sombra and the Empire, about the fallen king’s current condition, and about his apparent distress at being called hopeless. Everything Twilight would want to know, so she had something to show after a week in Canterlot. Just because she’d sent letters every night didn’t mean Twilight was satisfied, so hopefully a mess of notes would tide her over for a day or two.
Only once it was time to go did Starlight bring her attention back to Sombra, awakening him from sleep she hadn’t even noticed him in to wrap the rope around his neck and lead him away. He stayed quiet as they left, only letting out a low whine when Princess Luna ran into the two of them in the halls. Celestia had caught her up on the day’s event when she’d awoken for her nightly duties, and she had gone immediately to Starlight to get both sides of the story.
“I must repeat myself Starlight, are you sure this is a good idea?” She asked. She’d been a bit more forgiving to Sombra than her sister, though she too had her doubts, “I understand your reasoning, but the ponies of Ponyville are no more likely to appreciate Sombra’s presence than the ponies here.”
“Maybe not, but I’d feel better if Sombra was somewhere else right now, I don’t think Canterlot’s been good for him,” Starlight explained, doing her best to hide Sombra as a wandering pony glanced to the trio unsurely, “Or me, for that matter. I’d really like to get back to the school as well, I can’t shirk responsibilities just because I’ve got a stubborn ex-king to take care of.”
Sombra huffed in annoyance at Starlight’s comment, but said nothing. He’d been unreadable nearly the whole trip, shuffling alongside them halfheartedly. He kept his head low with ears twitching, and Starlight could’ve sworn she saw him tremble a few times, typically when Luna spoke. Most curious of all however, was that he’d tried his best to stay as close to Starlight as possible, occasionally brushing against her.
Starlight didn’t stop him when he did this, nor did she question why he did. She knew enough, because even with his shady past, Sombra was still a pony. He needed companionship, as much as he pushed the thought away, and after weeks of being someplace he wasn’t comfortable with, he was more desperate than ever to find some degree of comfort. Though he might’ve been too proud to say it, he was going to cling to the one thing that comforted him, and right now that thing was Starlight. Because as much as he fought and ridiculed her, she was the only pony he knew that he wasn’t scared of.
Or at least, that’s what Starlight liked to think. If anything, it was certainly preferable over him trying to run away again.
“Are there going to be any other ponies on the train?” Luna asked, still cautious.
“I don’t think so, it’s a Sunday night after all, so most ponies aren’t going to be traveling,” Starlight said with a shake of her head, “Maybe a few, but I spared a few extra bits to use a sleeper car, so nopony should see us, and I’ll hopefully be able to get some sleep too.”
“You’re going to be sleeping in the same room as him?”
That hadn’t actually been something Starlight had thought about, but there wasn’t much she could do now, and with a sigh, she said, “Yes. It’ll be fine though, don’t worry. We’ll have separate beds, and he won’t dare to hurt me, at risk for another stay in the dungeon. Isn’t that right, Sombra?”
She made sure to put emphasis on that last bit, gently yanking the rope to get Sombra’s attention. He growled quietly in response, yanking the rope a bit harder from his end.
“Wouldn’t even dream of it,” He spat, the first thing in hours, a small yet cruel grin forming upon his face when Luna’s feathers audibly ruffled.
“I do not like this at all,” She said.
“I’ll keep him on his leash,” Starlight assured.
The train station was finally within sight, and for that Starlight was relieved. She was so ready to go home, away from all the stress of Canterlot, even if she couldn’t rid herself of being Sombra’s caretaker and reformer.
One thing at a time, She thought, stepping up to the train car and pulling two tickets out of her bag, We’re getting there, however slowly.
“Ah, I suppose this is the part where I go then?” Luna asked, still eyeing Sombra.
“I guess so, but please don’t worry about me or Sombra,” Starlight said, before pausing, “Oh, and before I go, do you remember the guards that escorted him to me when I first decided to so this?”
Luna nodded, “Yes, I recall the two of them.”
“Well, they attacked Sombra, and even with what he’s done I feel that was completely uncalled for,” Starlight explained, “But that aside, I’ve got things handled.”
“I’m sure you do,” The Princess nodded, spreading her wings with a smile to take to the air, “I have the utmost faith in you Starlight, certainly a bit more than my sister. I’m sure you can teach Sombra thing or two, just as I am about to teach a certain duo of guardsponies.”
Starlight gave a small bow as Luna turned away and flew to the castle to get on with her duties. Gently tugging the rope, she lead Sombra into the train car, handing the tickets to the conductor. He eyed the two curiously, more confused by a metal masked stallion on a rope than anything else. Of course, few ponies knew about Sombra’s current predicament, and there was no telling if he had even been present for Sombra’s siege of Canterlot in the first place.
“It’s a long story,” Starlight said simply, making her way into the train car.
The room was much smaller than she had hoped, two little beds, separated by a narrow table and a window. She’d had to go for one of the cheaper options, most of her bits were still in Ponyville seeing how this hadn’t been a planned trip, but it would have to do.
Letting Sombra into the room first, she dropped the rope and said, “Alright, choose a bed and stay in it.”
He lifted his head to sniff the air, turning to each of the beds to get a whiff of them, before hopping onto the one on his right. It was a bit small, but he curled up as comfortably as he could, jolting slightly when he felt magic tingle his neck. Starlight untied the rope and tossed it and her bag on the table, shutting the room’s door and hopping onto her own bed.
Feeling his neck to make sure the rope was truly gone, Sombra asked, “I thought you were going to keep me on the leash?”
“I don’t trust you not to choke yourself with it,” She said, “Now be quiet, unless you’ve decided to end the silent treatment right as I want to go to bed?”
“I just thought you’d started missing my lovely voice is all.”
Back to his usual snark then. At least he seemed to be over whatever happened earlier.
“I missed you about as much as I’d miss a tick,” Starlight replied with the role of her eyes, though she couldn’t help but smile at seeing him a bit more cheery, “Glad to see you’re feeling better anyway.”
“A little Stockholm syndrome never hurt anyone,” Sombra grinned.
With that, her smile was gone and she bopped him on the nose, shaking her head as she said, “Thanks for reminding me you’re still a terrible pony.”
Sombra sneezed, nose twitching at the firm but gentle hit. He rubbed it with a quiet yet bitter laugh, rolling onto his side and saying, “I’ve been trying to remind you I’m irredeemable this whole time, something you have yet to grasp.”
“Save it for tomorrow, I’m going to sleep,” Starlight sighed, flopping onto her side with her back to Sombra. She didn’t want to hear his claims of hopelessness and evil, as true as they may be. At this point, reforming him was just as much a challenge to prove she could as it was an act of helping him.
He thankfully seemed to listen, Starlight heard him rustle around on his bed, and then nothing. The room was quiet, nothing more than the sudden sound of the train’s horn as it got moving, and the quiet sounds of it on the railway. Gentle vibrations of the train car below added an extra lull, and Starlight found herself soon in a state of near sleep, though her mind still raced.
She thought about her job, going back to the school and all the questions she might get about where she’d been, Twilight likely hadn’t let word slip after all. Trixie came to mind as well, Starlight often visited her after work or during breaks, so that was something she’d have to deal with, no doubt she’d have to tell her everything. And of course, Sombra. She’d have to figure out a way to balance work and reforming him, and hopefully having some free time in the mix. Who knew how much longer he’d have to be supervised?
Much longer than either he or she would have liked, probably. He was desperate for his independence, yet everyone else was still so focused on keeping him contained. It wouldn’t work for much longer, he was already restless, so it was only a matter of time before he started getting outwardly frustrated. More so than usual anyway.
A muffled sound from beside her, and Starlight turned to him in worry. She didn’t quite like having her back to him, and the thought of him trying to hurt her did cross her mind, but she was relieved to see him still lying in his bed. Curled up, face in his hooves, the same position he’d settled into earlier, but now facing toward her. The one he’d settled into when he’d been so upset.
Watching him for a sign of still being awake, but seeing none, Starlight whispered, “Sombra?”
“Hm?”
“What happened earlier? What did I do that made you so upset?”
He didn’t respond immediately, with words or actions. Starlight thought him ignoring her, but a quiet sigh proved otherwise.
“You didn’t do anything,” He whispered, “I did. I abandoned Hope a long time ago, and there’s no changing that.”
“Sombra…”
“No. Don’t think you can change anything, what’s done is done.”
Starlight wanted to argue, but held back. She knew, personally, that what Sombra said was wrong. She could help him change, but he had to be willing to do it. He truly did feel hopeless about himself, and in a way, that was good. Perhaps he was finally letting go of all that hate and greed, giving up his struggles for power. That alone proved he had the ability to change, and that abandoning hope was not a reason for punishment.
Rolling onto her back, she gazed out the window above her, the moon shining overhead. A few clouds floated through the sky, stragglers from the cloudy afternoon. The Pegasi had probably opted to leave them, there weren’t any important occasions coming up, so a few extra clouds weren’t going to ruin anything. You could still see plenty of stars, and of course the shining symbol of Luna herself.
Luna. Another pony with a shadowy past, who did things some would consider unforgivable. She had said she had faith in Starlight, and it had given her a bit more confidence. Between her stubbornness to prove herself, and belief from yet another former tyrant, there was more hope for Sombra yet.
Now if only Sombra could have hope for himself, then things might be a bit easier.
But that would be an issue for tomorrow, for now it was time to sleep. Smiling at the moon, she turned to Sombra and whispered, “I’m sure we can figure this out, just you wait and see.”
Sombra twitched an ear in response.
The full moon was bright, illuminating the miles of sand before it, though very little could be seen among the vast wasteland. Bone Dry Desert, a burning hot valley of certain death for some, and a one way trip to a more unfortunate fate for others, looked to be as barren as usual. Nothing but the sound of the wind could be heard, and if one were to listen closely, the near silent beating of wings.
It was not a place to be taken lightly, though a certain old gargoyle had found peace in his occasional visits. After centuries of a hectic life ruling a kingdom he felt he didn’t truly belong in, it was nice to have the relief of peace. A place he could meditate, alone with nothing but his thoughts and the sky above.
Many others would consider it a merciless place, but he knew this was only by day. Those who were lucky enough to make it through during the night however, were always blessed with a cool breeze and a cloudless sky full of stars. It was a breathtaking sight, but one you can't focus on for too long, at risk of being caught in the heat of the eventual sunrise.
So it came to a big surprise when he wandered upon a lone pony.
She was sitting upon a rock, staring into the stars. Though covered by a ragged cloak, he could see how her coat and mane shone in the moonlight, sparkling like a gemstone. Curious by such an unusual sight, he landed nearby, wings alerting her to his presence. She gave a gasp of surprise as she turned and saw him, rising to stand as a bit of magic sparked at her horn. Thinking quickly, the gargoyle dropped his staff and held his hands up to show he wasn’t a threat.
“Do forgive me,” He said, “It’s just been so long since I’ve last seen a pony, especially one this far outside of Equestria. Are you lost my dear?”
The Unicorn shook her head, eyeing him warily as she settled back onto the rock and said, “No, just wandering. It’s been a long while since I’ve seen the full moon.”
The gargoyle nodded in understanding, but was still curious. Perhaps she was a resident of Klugetown? It seemed unlikely, but he couldn’t think of any other reason a pony wouldn’t see the night sky. The moon was sacred to them after all, it was a connection to their home, a sight to assure that no matter where they were, the Celestial Sisters were watching over them. He had heard so many sing praise to the Sisters when he had visited so long ago, he dreaded the thought that these comforts had been forgotten.
He shoved these fears aside, simply saying, “It’s quite beautiful tonight, isn’t it? Desert doesn’t get too many clouds.”
“It is,” She nodded, staring almost longingly at the sky, “It’s almost strange actually, I grew up in a land where the snow illuminated everything, and I never saw so many stars.”
The gargoyle couldn’t help but notice a bit of sadness in her voice, her gaze to the sky wavering. He thought to ask, but stayed quiet. It wasn’t his business, and he had no intention of making his presence any more uncomfortable for the young Unicorn.
“If you don’t mind me asking,” She started suddenly, looking back to her visitor, “What are you doing out here? I can’t say I’ve ever seen anything like you before, you’re not from that nasty town, are you?”
“Oh no, I’m a wanderer as well. I have been for a very long time,” He said. So, she wasn’t from Klugetown. That was actually a huge relief to him, the creatures in that town weren’t the least bit friendly, and this pony was young. He couldn’t think of any moral reason a pony would be in that horrible place. The way she tilted her head at his answer, eyes bright and filled with curiosity, made him realize she appeared quite naive as well.
“How long is very long?” She asked.
The gargoyle shrugged, looking to the sky again as he answered, “A few hundred years or so. I’ve lost count.”
She laughed, an innocent laugh like that of a carefree child. He was brought out of the stars at the sound, looking to his new companion with a raised brow of curiosity.
Covering her mouth with a hoof, she giggled, “That’s not that long!”
“Is that not the span of multiple generations of ponies?” He asked. Her laughter was infectious, and a small smile made its way to his face despite confusion as he asked, “You don’t even seem a fraction of a century old my dear, how exactly is that not a long time to someone such as yourself?”
“Because I’m a Crystal Pony,” She said. The gargoyle still seemed confused, so she further elaborated, “From the Crystal Empire?”
“I’m afraid I’ve never heard of such a place.”
“That’s probably because it was cursed to disappear for a thousand years,” She said, glancing back to the sky. Her happiness from before had faded, that same look of sadness upon her face. "I wasn't actually there when it happened, believe it or not. I had something else keeping me alive."
“I’m sorry, I must not have been in Equestria when that happened,” He said. A curse to banish a kingdom and the magic to extend life without apparent cost seemed a bit extreme. Then again, the gargoyle was quite long lived himself, and had seen some rather severe punishments in his time, so who’s to say any of this was out of the question?
“You really have been around a long time, haven’t you?” The Unicorn asked, "It’s okay though, the Empire is back. I tried to return, but I don’t think I belong there anymore.”
“Now don’t think like that, I’m sure they’d all be happy to see you.”
She shook her head, “Oh no, it’s not like that. I need to find somepony I lost. I've been trying to find him, but I don't know where to look. All I know is that he's not in the Empire anymore. I don’t even know if he’s still alive, or if he’d even be happy to see me. That’s why I’m out here, because I’m not sure where else to look."
So young, yet so worn from years of living, the gargoyle thought. Smiling sympathetically, he walked forward and leaned down to the pony’s eye level. She looked at him unsurely, likely a bit wary at him being so close.
“I lost someone once too,” He said. The pony tilted her head. “We were very close at one point, but then he did something terrible, something I couldn’t agree with. He was locked away, just like your home, but I don’t know if he’s ever come back, or if he’s still alive. I don’t know if he’d ever forgive me for what I’ve done either.”
The pony turned her head away, a bit more sad than she had been before, “Oh, I’m sorry…”
The gargoyle smiled sadly, reassuring, “Don’t be, it’s ancient history to me. Our story is done and told, and though I’ve done many things I regret throughout it, there’s nothing to be done anymore. You’re still young, and your story is still at the beginning, as dreadfully long as it has been. You’ve still got a chance. If your friend was caught in the same curse, I’m sure he’s out there waiting for you.”
The pony smiled, wiping her eyes as tears threatened to form. Looking up to the gargoyle, she held that same hoof to his chest.
“Don’t be like that,” She said, using his earlier words against him, “Who said your story was over? Your heart’s still beating isn’t it?”
Her innocence showed itself again, and the gargoyle couldn’t help but envy her a bit. It was so hard to stay hopeful after a tragedy, even after such a long time, but this pony was showing him it was always possible.
Setting a hand onto his chest and over her hoof, he said, “You’re a wonderful girl, I hope you know that. Don’t let anyone convince you otherwise. What’s your name, young one?”
“Radiant Hope,” She said, “What’s yours?”
“A lovely name for someone such as yourself. You may call me Scorpan.”
Radiant Hope nodded, taking her hoof back to look back to the stars for a moment longer. Scorpan rose to his feet, retrieving his staff as he too looked to the sky as well, noting the position of the moon. Sunrise would be in a few hours, and he knew the heat of the desert would be too much for Radiant. He thought to say something, but she beat him to it.
Hopping off the rock, she asked, “Would you like to join me in my search of Equestria? Maybe we can find you your happy ending.”
Scorpan smiled, “I think I’d like that.”
Starlight awoke with a start, the blare of the train horn assaulting her ears and bringing her out of a rather fitful sleep. She’d awoken multiple times throughout the night, once from Sombra rolling off his bed, a few times from him crying out in his sleep, and many times from her own anxieties. Which, rather ironically, were also caused by Sombra. She might’ve taken charge of him, but going as far as sleeping in the same room as the ex-tyrant had left her a bit more uneasy than expected.
Not that he was being intimidating in any way. He was lying in bed with his arms over his face, ears pinned back, trying to ignore the commotion around him to get a moment more of rest. His teeth were bared in a scowl, a quiet growl escaping as the train’s horn sounded again.
“Someone turn that confounded thing off!” He shouted, shoving his face into a pillow, “I’ve barely gotten a wink of sleep!”
“Guess you shouldn’t have taken that nap before we left then,” Starlight yawned, stretching a bit, “We’re nearly to Ponyville, probably best to wait until we get there to try and sleep again.”
“Maybe if it didn’t sound like I was sleeping in the same room as a timberwolf,” Sombra groaned, grabbing the pillow to cover his ears, ignoring Starlight as he curled up with his back to her. She merely sighed at his stubbornness, turning to stare out the window as they approached Ponyville. It was still dark out, Celestia had yet to raise the sun, so that should hopefully leave her plenty of time to settle Sombra in before heading to the school.
Except now that she was so close to home, she felt less than thrilled about getting back to work. Sure, she missed the kids, and her friends in Ponyville, but after such terrible sleep she wasn’t really in the mood to just up and get to work again. She was half tempted to join Sombra in the struggle for sleep, but with another blare of the horn, and a frustrated scream from the stallion, Ponyville was in sight.
Few ponies seemed to be wandering about, and only one lone figure stood at the train station. Starlight recognized the silhouette as Twilight, stretching her wings as she tried to loosen the stiff appendages. No doubt she’d awoken early, making sure to be on time to welcome Starlight back to Ponyville. Shooting a glance at Sombra, it struck Starlight that this might not have been the best idea, but it was too late to change anything.
“So are you awake now?” She asked.
“Regrettably so,” He muttered, slipping out of the bed to stand. He wobbled a moment on all fours, the moving floor beneath him throwing him off in his state of half sleep. It only got worse when the train stopped, and he stumbled to the ground with a grunt at the sudden motion.
Starlight helped him up, throwing on her saddlebag and loosely tying the rope around Sombra’s neck before she lead him out. He dragged his hooves as he went, head held low and mane limp, more exhausted than Starlight expected.
“Are you feeling okay?” She asked, “You don’t look well.”
He just grunted, leaving Starlight concerned and confused. She stopped him at the door, gently putting a hoof to his head to check his temperature. He didn’t feel any warmer than usual, though it had been a bit hard to measure since he smacked her hoof away.
“I’m fine,” He assured, “Just tired. Hurry up and take me to wherever we’re going so I can sleep.”
“Alright, but Twilight is out there,” She said. Sombra visibly stiffened. “She won’t do anything to you, I promise. I’ll stay between the two of you if it makes you feel better.”
“I don’t need you protecting me.”
“Of course not,” Starlight nodded. She looked over Sombra worriedly, but exited the train without another word. Sombra trailed along behind her, stumbling out the door when he misjudged distance, then stiffening as he heard a frighteningly familiar voice.
“Is everything alright?”
Sombra bared his teeth and lowered his head with his horn posed to strike, but Starlight set a hoof on his shoulder to hold him in place.
“Everything’s fine, Sombra’s just a bit tired is all,” She assured. Sombra stamped a hoof. “And perhaps a bit moody because of that. Forgive my bluntness, but could we postpone the greetings for now and get him settled at the castle?”
Twilight nodded, “Yes, of course. Come along then.”
They got going, Sombra once again trailing along behind Starlight with his ears erect, twitching at every noise of Twilight's. A ruffle of feathers, a greeting to a passing pony, a short conversation with Starlight.
“So, how were the Princesses?” She asked.
“Uh, they’re good, I guess,” Starlight responded, “Busy as always. Perhaps a bit on edge.”
Twilight hummed, silent the rest of the way. Only once they’d gotten to the castle and taken Sombra to his room did she think to speak again, waiting until Starlight had grabbed a quick breakfast and brought the topic up herself.
“I’m gonna have to bring him a muffin or something,” She muttered, pouring herself a quick bowl of cereal, “Neither of us have eaten much since yesterday, and food usually does a pretty good job of shutting him up, once he realizes it’s not gonna poison him.”
“You’re really dedicated to this, aren’t you?” Twilight asked, sipping a cup of hot coffee. Even she hadn’t planned to wake up so early, so a little boost should hopefully help, “Has he made any progress yet?”
Starlight shrugged, “I think? He’s still got some horrid manners, and says some pretty cruel things, but he hasn’t gone out of his way to hurt me. It’s something I suppose.”
Twilight nodded, “Certainly better than I’d have expected.”
“I just wish I knew why he’s like this,” Starlight sighed, taking a bite of her cereal, “There’s nothing about him in any History books, and he won’t tell me anything himself! He’s so secretive, it’s annoying. I set him off on accident yesterday, and every time I ask him what his motives might’ve been, he just asks me why I want to reform him. It’s a never ending cycle.”
“Then stop asking.”
Starlight nearly dropped her spoon. Twilight, the perpetual knowledge seeker and bookworm, telling her to stop asking questions that could really help her?
“Wha- But why?” Starlight asked, “Wouldn’t learning about what makes Sombra so angry help me? If he tells me, maybe I could help him learn to overcome it or something. I’ve helped plenty of students with their issues, I’m sure if I got something out of Sombra I could help him too.”
“Sombra’s not one of our students though, is he?” Twilight asked. Starlight shook her head with the obvious answer, to which Twilight took another sip of coffee and continued, “I admit, he’s probably got some issues of his own, but they’re not yours to deal with. You’re not his therapist, so stop trying to be one.”
“But all the things he’s done! It helped me to tell you what happened, why I was so sad and upset, and I want to do the same with Sombra.”
“He’s not you though,” Twilight explained, “You and Sombra are two very different ponies, with two very different personalities. Sombra might not be as willing as you were to talk about his past, and you have no reason to keep pestering him about it. If Sombra wants to tell you anything, he’ll do so on his own time.”
Starlight pushed her bowl away, spilling a bit of the milk as she tried to argue, “I’m sure he will, but it’s been a week, and I might be close. He told me something last night, and-”
Twilight silenced her with a gentle hoof on her shoulder.
“These things take time,” She said, “I know personally, that it takes a while for ponies with questionable motives to learn to change. I mean, do you really think Discord embraced friendship immediately? It took him a betrayal before he realized he cared.”
Starlight sighed, “I understand. it’s just, I really don’t feel like anything’s happening, you know? I feel like I’m never going to be able to help him, and I thought if I knew something about what made him so angry, I’d be able to find a way to fix it. But I can’t, because all I know are his crimes, I don’t know anything about him specifically.”
“You might have to do things differently than we did,” Twilight assured, “I’m sure you’ll figure it out, but for now, just finish your breakfast and get ready for work. Maybe visit Trixie when you get the chance later, she’s been stopping by to talk to me, believe it or not.”
Starlight laughed with a nod, finishing her breakfast and cleaning up her mess before heading off to the washroom to freshen up. She brushed her teeth and smoothed her coat, struggling to get her mane to fall like she wanted before returning to the kitchen. Her first thought was to reach out to grab something for Sombra to eat, but Twilight stopped her.
“Nope, you’re going straight to work,” She said, motioning Starlight away from the counter with a wing, “I’ll give Sombra his breakfast today.”
Starlight fidgeted, “I’m not sure that’s a good idea, Sombra’s scared of you. What if he lashes out?”
“He's going to be staying in my castle, so he needs to learn to deal with me. The least I could do is try to make him feel welcome,” Twilight explained, folding her wings, “Now I know it’s early, but get to the school, and please tell our friends that I might be a bit late.”
“Are you sure you’re okay with this?” Starlight asked. She wasn’t sure if Twilight had been late for anything as long as she’d known her.
“It’s fine, and I can send Spike to take over my class for a moment if I take too long.”
Starlight nodded hesitantly, exiting the kitchen while Twilight prepared a quick meal. She’d read through Starlight’s letters multiple times, and knew Sombra had mostly been fed fruit and little breakfast pastries, so she decided she’d try to make him a bit happier with something different. Blueberry pancakes seemed like a good bet, and she had an excuse to make them, what with Spike having to wake up soon. She even threw some sapphires she had hidden in his, an extra special something to hopefully keep him from being too upset about any extra work she might need him to do.
He came into the room right as Twilight finished their plates, checking to make sure she didn’t accidentally throw a gemstone pancake into Sombra’s pile before setting Spike’s serving on the table. The little dragon hopped into his seat hungrily, eyeing his breakfast before looking to Twilight curiously.
“So what’s the occasion?” He asked, reaching for the syrup as Twilight set it on the table, “You never have the time to make breakfast on a Monday, especially not anything with sapphires.”
“Starlight brought Sombra over this morning,” Twilight explained. Spike nodded, having been told about these plans already, though he was still wary. “I might need you to handle class for me this morning, if that’s alright? At least keep them occupied until I come in. I want to talk to him.”
Spike nodded, “Can do. I’ll try not to let slip we’ve got a monster in the castle.”
“Thank you Spike!” Twilight exclaimed, hugging him with a wing before grabbing the other plate of pancakes and making her way to Sombra’s room. It wasn’t far, and she stopped at his door, hoof raised to knock in a moment of doubt.
She still felt bad about what she’d done to him, how couldn’t she? She’d obliterated his physical body, albeit temporarily, and drove him back into that feral state he’d been in when she’d first encountered him all those years ago. Starlight’s letters had thankfully proven his condition temporary, but she was still worried about setting him off again. There was also still a tiny part of her that felt like he deserved punishment, but she pushed that away. She was the Princess of Friendship, the least she could do was give Sombra a chance.
A small whine beyond the door, and Twilight knocked to announce herself, opening the door before Sombra got a chance to answer. He shot up as she entered, back against the wall, ears erect and body rigid.
“Starlight?”
His tone was desperate, that much Twilight could tell.
“Sorry, but no,” She said. Sombra’s desperation turned to anger, teeth bared in a snarl, though his body stayed stiff. “I’m sure you recognize my voice.”
“Here to finish the job then, Princess? Don’t think I won’t go down without a fight this time.”
“Actually, I’m just here to bring you breakfast.”
She set the plate down on the bedside table, Sombra flinching back at the sound. He sniffed the air unsurely, getting a whiff of the pancakes, but didn’t move, ears twitching between Twilight and the open window nearby.
“They’re poisoned, aren’t they?” He asked.
“Considering I fed a friend of mine from the same batch, I’d hope not,” Twilight assured, making her way to the window to close it. She hadn’t remembered it being open, but figured Starlight must have cracked it for airflow, “I’m not here to hurt you Sombra, I just want to talk.”
“I think we’re far past the point of talking.”
“What are we doing now then?”
A flare of his mane and a contained spark of his horn, and Sombra snarled again. He was not at all happy at being within the same room as Twilight, and she could see him twitching in an urge to either run or fight. So, talking was not actually going as smoothly as she hoped. She’d have to get all this done quick.
“Sombra, I’m here to apologize,” She began. His snarl faltered, fading to something akin to confusion, “I won’t deny you deserve punishment, you’ve done terrible things. You hurt ponies and enslaved them for your own selfish desires, you’ve even done terrible things to my friends and family, and I can’t forgive that. But I never intended to hurt you like I did.”
“Yet despite your intentions, I didn’t see a lick of regret on your face as you and your entourage obliterated me with that terrible blast of light magic,” Sombra growled, “I saw smiles on your faces as the magic tore me apart and ripped the very soul from my body. Your apology means nothing, just as any apology you might beg for from me.”
“I swear, I never expected the magic to hurt you like that, it’s never done it before. It’s imprisoned and purified, but it’s never destroyed,” Twilight said, beginning to think, “And it still hasn’t. You’re here now after all. Starlight theorized that there must be a shred of goodness in you that allowed you to survive, a part of you that proves you’re not all bad, and she wants to find that part.”
“A shred of goodness? Really?” Sombra laughed, slipping off the bed to make his way toward her, “Didn’t you just say I’m a horrible pony? That I deserve punishment? What is it that you really think, Princess? Because you’re telling more riddles than that chaotic abomination you call your friend.”
Twilight flinched as he came near her, but held her ground. Of course, he wouldn’t like Discord either. He’d had a claw in his defeat, as minor as it was.
“A horrible pony can still learn to become a good pony,” She said. Sombra’s sneer widened.
“You’re naivety about good and bad is laughable,” He mocked, “There are so many things about me you don’t know, little Princess. I’ve done things unimaginable, things not even the Crystal Ponies know.”
He stood before her, blinded and powerless, but above her eye level. He practically towered above her, but even with his dominating stance she could still tell he was frightened. His ears were stiff in her direction, and he scraped the ground irritably, torn between running away or challenging her further.
Twilight stared back, struggling for a response. Starlight was right about him being a mystery, and strangely insistent on being irredeemable. She didn’t want to agree with him, she wanted to see if he had some chance of reforming himself, but as it was now, she wasn’t sure. Starlight had told her about what she knew about him in her letters, about how he’d killed Princess Amore. He was more than just a slave driver and manipulator, he was a murderer. How could anypony forgive that?
There were always two sides to every story however, and they only had Celestia’s word as evidence. Twilight hated to doubt her beloved mentor, but her curiosity got the best of her.
“Have you ever killed?” She asked.
Sombra’s cruel grin faded. He stepped back in surprise, and maybe even confusion, either trying to fully register Twilight’s words, or think of an appropriate response.
“I can control ponies with a single glance, what need do I have for killing?” He asked, almost a bit doubtful of his words, though he bared his teeth again as he continued, “No, I’ve never killed. I can manipulate and terrify, murder would be nothing more than a merciful end to any who might have apposed me.”
“Or perhaps an excuse to get rid of a nuisance,” Twilight suggested.
“That’s a rather twisted accusation, don’t you think?”
“I’m merely thinking as I expect somepony like you would.”
Sombra snorted, tail flicking as though insulted, “I’ve already told you. I’ve never killed, nopony has been worth the effort.”
Celestia says differently, Twilight thought, though she wouldn’t dare say it aloud. It was hard to tell if he was being truthful, a masked face made reading expressions difficult, and he made no obvious signs of a liar through his body language. She didn’t want to assume Celestia had been the one to lie, but perhaps there was more to this than even she knew.
It was information that would have to wait however, and with a sigh, Twilight turned to the door. Sombra listened as she went, ears following her movement.
“Well, I’m glad we could have this discussion, and I’m glad to see you’ve been recovering nicely,” She said. Sombra snorted again, doubtful of her words. “I’ll leave you be for now, I’ve got work to do. Make yourself comfortable, but don’t even try leaving the room, I’ll be checking on you throughout the day.”
“Do you really expect me to get far?” He asked, “I still can’t see. What exactly would you expect me to do, fall down a flight of stairs?”
“I expect you to behave,” Twilight said, opening the door to make her leave, “Perhaps if you refrain from doing anything rude over the week, I’ll remove it. I imagine you’ve recovered enough that you won’t risk losing yourself again, but I’d like to keep it on for a bit longer.”
“Surely there are better ways to handle this? Keeping any Unicorn’s magic contained is a series of migraines waiting to happen.”
“Maybe, but you’re not quite deserving of less right now,” Twilight claimed, “So you better start learning some manners. Perhaps actually eating the food you were graciously offered would be a good start?”
Sombra frowned as she left, ears folded back as she shut the door louder than he expected. Quiet enough to not be considered slamming, but loud enough to make sure he heard it. Baring his teeth in frustration, he made his way around the room, sniffing and feeling around until he made it to the bedside table. The room was practically empty, nothing more than the bare minimum for a guest, and even less than suitable for his own tastes.
Speaking of tastes, he couldn’t deny that he was hungry, and whatever the princess had brought in smelled good enough. Sighing in defeat, he sat down in front of the little table and leaned over the food, sniffing again to try and identify it. He recognized the scent of berries, and a subtly nostalgic smell he recognized as a breakfast food he hadn’t eaten in centuries.
Tearing a piece away with his teeth, he began to eat. There was a shred of relief at finally being allowed a somewhat proper meal, and one that tasted surprisingly good. Not that he’d admit that to Twilight, all she said was that he had to eat the food, and that he could do.
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Ha! Sombra said he already lost Hope
And Starlight heard he already lost hope.
See what you did there.
So, did you change to Sombra Radiant Hope romance or stuck with Sombra Starlight?
I would be pissed off at Discord as well. Who pretty much brought Sombra back so he would be murdered horrifically.
I still consider this worse then anything Sombra ever did.
9966284
I love word play.Nope, still Sombra and Starlight! I just love Hope too much to truly leave her out.9966659
Grogar and Discord are separate entities in my story, I began writing a little after the premier, but nonetheless I agree. Really didn't like how the Sombra & the other villains were treated, I'm not at all a fan of seeing bad guys come back just to be given worse punishments than what they'd already had. Especially when it's someone else's fault they were back at all.
Ah, but that's a rant I'll hold back on.
I like that Twilight apologized to Sombra and regrets what she did to him. Even after what Sombra did to her friends. Really shows that she is a Princess of Friendship.
Although I disagree with her opinion that Starlight shouldn't be therapist to Sombra. Sombra could use some hight quality therapy sessions.
Can't wait till the next chapter is published!
...Does Stockholm exist in Equestria? Or would that be Trotholm or something? I dunno, I just noticed that and it seemed a bit strange Might have something to do with the fact that I actually live in Stockholm, but whatever.
Anyway, intriguing to know that Scorpan and Radiant Hope are now a part of this story. Will definitively look forward to when they come into play.
Hmmmm...while I see your point, I honestly thought a previous scene in this story actually made a lot of sense if it really was Discord. When Chrysalis and the others learned of Sombra's survival, they all were plotting to have him killed, but Grogar was very insistent on them not doing that. If that was actually Discord, then the motive for that would be that despite how much of a jerk he is, he would not condone shooting someone while they're down, and merely pretended to be solely doing it for pragmatic reasons. But eh, it's still your story, and I wouldn't know if you've planned the whole story out already or not.
9966937
I won't deny Sombra could use some therapy, but Starlight is simply a counselor, and I didn't want to get into a potentially uncomfortable doctor/patient romance plot. This is supposed to be a shipping story between the two of them after all! ...Even if neither of them feel anything yet.
9967179
There's probably some pony in History somewhere named some horse pun of Stockholm but I can only think of so many horse puns. That scene wasn't even in the original draft, words just flow from my brain and onto the document and I kept it because the thought of Starlight bopping him was funny. The struggles of writing horses.
As for your second bit, I absolutely like the way you think, but that chapter was posted before the finale even aired, or around when the episodes first leaked. Either way I had not known the whole plot twist at the time I wrote that scene.
Plus, Grogar did want to kill Sombra, though he never said it out loud, but knew it would be suspicious for Sombra to just suddenly wind up dead or disappear.
I suppose I could stick closer to canon, but this story is more or less planned out. Then again, last night I came up with another idea for a major point later in the story, so who knows? Things in writing never really stay the same throughout the writing process, the end never starts out as you originally wrote it, so Discord could still be Grogar yet.
Maybe I should just say 'don't take my word for anything' because despite everything even I don't know how this story's truly gonna end.
9967407
I just got this image of Sombra beating the crap out of a depowered Discord, and Starlight and the girls letting it happen.
Starlight: 'It's therapeutic for him.'
Twilight: 'Ok. Sombra can do what he wants to him, short of killing him.'
Applejack: 'Tarnation, he sure did have it coming.'
Almost all of them take out some popcorn and enjoy the show.
9967407
I didn't think my comment like a 'doctor/patient romance' plot but more like that Twilight shouldn't throw 'You can talk to me about it if you want' idea out of the window right away. Or the thing that is Starlight trying to do right now. Well, I guess Sombra will have to express his feelings to Starlight at some point to move their relationship further.
And If I can ask was there any particular reason why you used a Starlight as a character for reforming Sombra? For me, it looks like a most logical choice since as a formal villain, Starlight can empathize with Sombra a far better than other characters and thus her motives are understandable. Or is it just because Starlight is your favorite character?
9967762
Ah, yeah I can understand that now. Twilight's not stopping Starlight from talking with Sombra about his problems as much as she's telling her to stop pestering him about it. Like she mentioned, Sombra will speak on his own time, but right now he's not comfortable with doing so, and Starlight's insisting on helping him when he doesn't want to be helped is only frustrating him more.
As for why I chose Starlight to reform Sombra? That's quite a long story, actually! To put it simply, back when I first read Siege of the Crystal Empire, I got the idea to write a little oneshot with a reformed Sombra and Starlight running into each other and talking. It never went anywhere, and the idea was left dormant until I saw the rumors of S9 leaks (rather late I might add), specifically the model sheet with Sombra and Grogar. At that point the idea went from a short little oneshot about the reformed duo to one where Starlight takes a shot at reforming Sombra. This was when Grogar was added to the story as well. By the time The Beginning of the End premiered I'd actually already gotten nearly two chapters written. These were promptly scrapped and rewritten.
I thought Starlight reforming him did seem like a fitting choice, and I was surprised it hadn't been done before. The concept of a former bad guy like her taking charge and helping him just seemed like a really neat one. I mean she'd helped with the Changelings and Stygian, she'd gotten a job as a counselor, and she could probably relate to someone like him, so why not help Sombra? The two felt like they'd make an interesting story, though the romance part of it was a late addition, a crack ship that I grew a little too attached to.
And the funniest part about all this? I didn't care for Starlight until I wrote the first outline of this story. It's not that she wasn't a good or interesting character, she just wasn't one I paid much attention to until I decided to write something with her. Throwing her in a story with another (at the time) former villain just seemed like a fun little writing idea, but then canon happened and everything about that changed, and I got attached to the idea I made. The fact it wasn't an idea that I'd seen done before also gave me that boost of motivation to write it.
9967899
It is an interesting comparison of Twilight and Starlight methods and experiences. It seems to me it was Starlight's insisting on helping what got Sombra from prison in the first place. Then again it was huge progress on Starlight part that Sombra was willingly talking to Twilight for more like 2 minutes (apart from that he didn't have a much of choice).
Otherwise, I would imagine their conversion something like:
“I swear, I never expected the magic to hurt you like that, it’s never done it before. It’s imprisoned and purified, but it’s never destroyed,” Twilight said, beginning to think, “And it still hasn’t-"
“That doesn't it make an even slightly better. Congratulation Princess. You can add 'Attempted murder' to your list of achievements. I hope you will have a nice sleep. Now please leave," Sombra growled.
On the other hand, I guess Twilight is more experienced in the long-term planning approach.
Wow, thanks for the answer about Starlight. Longer then I expected.
I agree with your points on Starlight. I think that her ability to relate to villains (something like her offer of peace to Chrysalis) is an important aspect that makes her, let's say qualified, then most other characters at reforming villains.
9967665
I think that also Chrysalis, Tirek and Cozy Glow would pay a lot of bits to have this kind of therapy session.
Hello, I just read through your story (atleast what you have so far) and I have to say it is excellent. Once I started I couldn't stop until it was finished. I love how you depicted both Sombra and Starlight and while I do believe that Starlight would be the one character most equip to handle the reform of King Sombra. I have to admit, I didn't even consider the two characters romanceable but the more that I think about it the more it makes a crazy kind of sense.
When I look at all their depictions within the 'friendship is magic' franchise it is amazing to me how similar they are too each other. It is actually quite plausible and these two could form a very strong bond of friendship that would grow into something much more powerful.
Bringing Radiant hope truly has me curious to see what her role will be in the grand scheme of things but now with this story and romance. I am wondering about Sunburst and what effect all of this will have on him.
I can't wait until the next installment. Fantastic job so far.
9981906
Well hey there, I'm happy to hear you're enjoying the story so far! And I couldn't agree more, Sombra and Starlight have quite a bit in common when you think about it, and I was genuinely surprised not to see more fics or art with them interacting. Therefore I've made it my duty to rectify such a problem.
Hope is here to appease my wish for more Hope contentI kid, she's got a purpose but I obviously can't say anything yet. As for Sunburst, I do have a plan to include him at some point, but it won't be for a long while.Okay but anyway, thank you for the comment! Was very nice to see after a relatively stressful day.
His gaze and deepest fears? I don't remember that being in the show. If so then geez it's been awhile.
9989514
It was established during his return in the S9 premier, which this fic takes place after. The fear thing was kinda already a thing with the doorway he created back in the Crystal Empire during S3, but the fear gaze was something completely new.
Oh gooooooshhh I just can't wait for more!
10010329
Oh hey you absolutely dominated my notifications across here and DA last night, very glad to see you're excited and like the story so far!
Even if the sudden influx of notifs across sites surprised me for a moment there. Still not used to when that happens.
10010968
Well, it's pretty rare I find an author who writes and draws very well. Normally, folks seem to be good at one or the other.
So...Um....Please tell me the next chapter is soon....Blitzing is sort of a bad habit of mine and I've already eaten this story up. I need more. This is too good and I'm a sucker for redemption/happy endings....Though I'm definitely not going to be surprised if it doesn't turn out that way with this. Ah well, either way, keep it comin', this really looks like a fun trip and I'm a sucker for well written Sombra.
10025619
I'm very happy to hear you've liked it so far! No promises, but I'm hoping I should have the next chapter done by this weekend, if not early next week, assuming nothing else happens in real life anyway. December might've eaten up a bunch of my time, but I'd managed to get good chunk of the chapter 7 done despite that.
After that, I can't promise much for sure, the entire story might be summarized, but every chapter still needs to essentially be written from scratch, more or less. I've really got a get a buffer going.
Also quite flattered you say I write Sombra well, and that the story doesn't seem quite predictable... I can assure you, we'll figure out if Sombra gets a happy ending or not in time.
10025686
Oh no worries, I know those pains all too well. No rush of course! Just love the story so far and my eagerness to get into more tends to push into my comments.
I think I know who this is!
I KNEW IT!
I noticed what you did with the capitalization of Hope.
This chapter is interesting to me. Considering, that since the movie is canon, they murdered the storm king. There is no other way to put it, they killed him. Maybe not intentionally, but that's how it happened. That is a detail I do not see talked about or even mentioned at all, and I feel like it has the potential to mean more.
10153702
Keep in mind that the Main 6 actually had very little to do with the Storm King's death. He tried to attack them, Tempest defended them, and in the process she turned him to stone and pushed him off the balcony where he shattered. Granted, Twilight and her friends did save Tempest and not him, but I never considered this murder on their part.
Plus MLP implied that being turned to stone and shattered does not result in immediate death, as shown by Princess Amore in Siege of the Crystal Empire, and a little scene in the credits of the movie.
So, y'know... He might be suffering a fate worse then death. Certainly fits the ponies usual punishments.
oh the irony
10285870
I mean I get where you're coming from, but in Twilight's defense she actually killed a threat whereas Sombra killed a princess he didn't happen to like, and he also took her throne and enslaved her people/ponies will he was at it.
Granted, Sombra's still kicking and he claims Amore isn't dead but there's not much to really back up this claim at this point.
Including Scorpan in this? YES!
So they were smiling about him being imprisoned/banished? They weren't smiling about killing him?
10847136
I'd say the smile was one of victory in general, and of just 'getting rid of the problem', so to speak. They smiled when they turned Discord to stone, and everyone other than Twilight had a smile on their face when they blasted the trio in the finale, so smiling as they finish off villains isn't unusual for them.
Twilight would probably be under the impression she banished Sombra, not outright killed him. It always bothered me to know their magic could kill.
10847185
Well they are the Elements of Harmony, not the Elements of Pure Goodness, though it is treated like one. Harmony represents the synergy between two or more elements. It could heal and it could kill, it could reform and banish and it could petrify and depetrify. It's just it's been used against forces of disharmony like a rampant chaos god or a mad moon goddess or a king hell-bent on the throne of Crystal Empire that many think of it as a force of good. But I don't think it'll work on theft, murder or fraud, they're very common and they do not threaten harmony. Just works on something to overthrow the balance of the world which is Harmony. For me, the EoH isn't necessarily a force of good, just that it can be one. For me, it's just a force of maintaining balance to the universe, to maintain the synergy. At least that's how my headcanon goes.
Really enjoying this.
11379406
I get where you're coming from but it's never not going to bother me that, out of all the villains, the only one it ever killed was Sombra. Like, the Crystal Heart obliterating him wasn't a big deal, because that's its own thing with its own kingdom. But the Elements? They're picky, I guess.
I was so worried this was going to be a case of “Celestia is the real villain because we need an arbitrary conflict catalyst,” so I was very happy to hear that she has an actual reason to be biased against Sombra.
I’m absolutely fascinated to see what Trixie will have to say about all this…