• Published 27th Jul 2019
  • 703 Views, 40 Comments

Amending Offences - Bookish Delight



The night after the Starswirl Music Festival, Sunset Shimmer apologizes to Pinkie Pie for losing patience with her. At least, she tries to.

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4: The Worst Coincidence

Sunset's mind spun. This was the last thing she'd ever expected to hear from the mouth of Pinkie Pie, of all people. She was now quite glad she'd held off eating any of that huge sundae, because she'd definitely be dizzy.

"Wha..." Sunset gaped. "Pinkie, what are you talking about? I don't ever want to hear you say that about yourself again, you hear me?" She gripped Pinkie's arms, holding back tears, doing her best not to assume the worst too soon. "You are perfect. Just the way you are. Just because people can't handle who you are, just because I have trouble sometimes, is no reason to tell yourself— "

"Stop," Pinkie said, her tone still soft and muted. "Please, just stop."

Sunset's arms dropped. Again with the unexpected responses. Did destroying the Time Twirler mess with her position in the multiverse? Was she talking to a different Pinkie Pie right now? Would she have to call the Twilights in on this?

Pinkie's sigh was loud and long. "I don't know exactly what I was like back there—during all those days when the concert went badly? But I can guess. I was probably super loud. I probably ran around a bunch. I was probably super impatient and knocked a lot of stuff over, got us splattered, made a nuisance of myself for you. All that, on top of getting us kicked out. How close am I?"

Sunset didn't reply, putting a hand behind her head to avoid saying anything. Upon doing so, she realized that that was probably saying something in itself. She quickly put her hand down, hoping Pinkie wouldn't notice, but Pinkie's tiny, lopsided smile a moment later told Sunset to drop that fantasy.

"It's not like I don't know what all my actions are, or what they can do to people," Pinkie said. "But I still do them because... because there's a whole lot to smile about in this universe, but there's also a whole lot that's not, and the not stuff is easy to get hung up on!" Pinkie gestured around herself. "And those things are everywhere, you know? I can turn on my phone and see someone having a bad day in five seconds, and they're someone I can't help because they're all the way across the country from me, or even just a different school, or because their problem is way more than some high school girl with an infinite supply of cotton candy can fix. And it..." Pinkie hugged herself with one arm. "It hurts too much, after you see enough of them."

Sunset still didn't reply. She was still too busy trying not to cry.

"So I go the extra mile to protect my smile," Pinkie continued. "And those of my friends, however I can. And I keep moving, from one joy to the next, so I'm not forced to pay too much attention to the smiles I can't help. Maybe it looks selfish. Maybe it gets messy. But I haven't found a better way to deal. Not yet.

"But moving so fast?" She closed her eyes, balling her fists by her side. "Also means I don't notice when it hurts someone close to me—which it always does—until it's too late. I'm sorry it was you this time, Sunset. It means I failed. In protecting your smile, and just... being all the good things I know I can be, too."


No.

No, no, nonononononononono.

Sunset's mind spun harder. She stopped trying to hold her tears back. Because no no no no no this was all wrong too. If Sunset could drive her head into the brick wall behind her without any lasting effects, she would have in a second.

Why was she so bad at this?

The guilt washed over again, covering her heart like a freshly dumped bucket of sludge. "Oh, Pinkie," she said, her voice cracking. "Just..." She took hold of Pinkie's arms again, bringing her close. "Oh my gosh, come here, please, I was so afraid of this. I never should have brought this up, but now I've screwed everything up, all because I felt guilty as usual."

"What?" Pinkie said, her voice shaking as well. "No, Sunset, I messed it all up. Or I mean, I would have if not for the time stuff? Ugh, you had to use time magic to cheat being mad at me! This is exactly why I don't..." She shook her head, pulling away. "This why I don't talk about this stuff, Sunset. Because that hurts people, too!"

Pinkie looked up, her eyes pleading, her voice half a sob. "I don't want to hurt you, Sunset. I don't want to hurt anyone. But no matter what I do, no matter what I try, I..."

"Listen to me, Pinkie Pie." Sunset shook her head furiously, teardrops flying from her face. "You could never hurt me. You'd literally have to not exist for that to hurt me, because life would suck without you here with me. Okay? I was the one who hurt you because I'm impatient and I didn't get what you were going for by just trying to put a smile on your face, and being ungrateful about it, and—"

"No, Sunset, no!" Pinkie's raised voice, cut Sunset off. "That's not what I mean! Don't you get it?"

"What—" Sunset tried as hard as she could to decipher Pinkie's words, but in the end, she had to ask: "What do you mean?"

"What I mean is, look at yourself right now! You're apologizing for being yourself, too!" Pinkie sniffled, rubbing her eyes. "And you're apologizing for not being me. Do you know which one's worse? Because I don't. I just know it's all my fault."

Sunset froze, unable to answer.

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