Fallout Equestria : Black And White

by Philweasel

Chapter 2.12 - Children of the Night

Chapter 2.12 - Children of the Night

Luna stumbled through the cold blackness, weak, lost, alone. She cried out but no pony heard, her pathetic struggles pointless as rough, groping hooves seized her. Blows rained down, accusing voices screaming out obscenities as she was bound and gagged, thrown to the floor and trampled into the dust.

Her horn was shoved down upon a rock, Luna screaming uselessly against her gag as the hammer fell.

Her vision swam, her perception of time lost. The pain blocked everything out, her every attempt at magic sending sharp waves of agony through her forehead. She stared uncomprehending at the snarling faces of those she had lived among, those who had accepted her, however grudgingly. Now there was only hate in those eyes.

She was thrown down upon the wood, splinters digging into her flesh. She gasped and spluttered as some thick, foul smelling liquid covered her, her hooves unable to find purchase as she tried to free herself from her bindings.

Her vision was held as the torch lit the night, crimson flames flaring up to the sky. The voices rose to a crescendo, chants of hate and loathing. At the very climax the torch was flung through the air to land at her hooves, sparks quickly turning into a inferno. Fire exploded all around her, covering her completely in its destructive embrace.

She didn’t burn.

~

Luna awoke, instantly regretting the action. She hurt all over, her right foreleg leg throbbing dully, her stomach tight and cramping, a sharp pain at the side of her head. She felt sick, exhausted physically and mentally.

But... she was in her room. Her heart was warmed as she looked to her bookcase, loaded with tomes too rare, fragile or dangerous to be trusted in the main library. Tales that defined her sat on those shelves, tales of Pipsqueak and Snowdrop, tales of pirates and princesses and magic and knights.

Her dresses sat upon their racks, complete and still under construction. She had worked so hard on them, some copied from books, others of her own creation. She had spent hours threading every seam, training up her horn as it slowly healed back to full strength. The colours and grandeur in those silks made her think of days when you could look out your window to more than dust and death and pain. They made her believe that she could one day lead her children to a world where everypony could be dressed in such finery, where they could leave in security and prosperity once again.

Celestia’s spear sat beside them. She had been carefully not to touch it, the traps there still stubbornly resistant to her attempts to disarm them. She didn’t care, it was a worthy challenge. She didn’t deserve to wield such a weapon until her magic was a match for Celestia’s.

And Swift Crimson stood at the end of the room, all gloomy and magnificent. From the look of his hooves and the bloodstained bowl of water he had been cleaning her up, a thought that made her both angry and absolutely enraptured at the same time.

That was their relationship all over really. She knew he felt the same way, so honest and obvious with his emotions. She delighted in it, endlessly amused with the ease in which she could anger him to incoherent rages and then draw him right back in with her womanly wiles. For her part she was careful to conceal her own emotions, never letting him know how much he got to her. And get to her he did. Her strong, silent knight, so honourable and righteous. He made her do better. Made her be better.

His eyes turned to her, widening in shock. It quickly turned into joyful relief, the buck actually having to catch himself to keep from crying. His voice was croaky, “Lu... damn I’m glad to see you open your eyes.”

“I’m not.” She grunted back, “I feel shitty.”

“You took one fucking hell of a beating.” He gave her a worried, pained look, his voice cracking, “I’ve never seen you hurt so badly. I’ve never seen you even close to that.”

She agreed that it was quite a shock. Before, yes she had taken her licks. She had actually been beaten up nearly as bad several times, and never having been a healthy child spent an awful lot of time laid up in bed with one sickness or another. But now... now she was made of sterner stuff. She was a goddess, invincible, untouchable. She really had brought into her own hype, and couldn’t help but be profoundly disquieted by the knowledge that there were those out there who could challenge her.

She had been stupid against Star Swirl. She was a... decent hoof to hoof fighter, but only that. She had let herself be fooled by the advantage conveyed by her size, and Star Swirl was even bigger. She wouldn’t make that mistake again, staying well away next time... though she was secretly a little impressed that Star Swirl had what it took to take her on one on one. She had to say that she had yet to be impressed by the mare beforehand.

Damn she felt horrible. The texture of her hot, sticky, sweaty mane spoke wonders for her usual attire of floaty magnificence, making her wonder if she should just cut it in favour of her swirly magical wig. Still she despised the thought of ever being so... unadorned, even if it was only in private like this, “I need a bath.”

“I tried cleaning you up as best I could...”

“Perv.”

As predicted, he instantly tried to protest, “I didn’t...!”

She grinned smugly at him, figuring that ‘be mean to Swift Crimson’ had always made her feel better in the past, “Let me get this straight. You have me, the mare of your dreams, totally at your mercy, having to be washed by you... and you didn’t perv? Even a little?”

“No.” He glared at her, full of hot anger, “You were horrifically injured, moaning in pain and you wouldn’t wake up for days. Radhi wasn’t sure if you’d even survive. It was not hot.”

She was really that badly hurt? She couldn’t even picture it, “Come on, you always take things so seriously! I regenerate, you’ve seen me injured before.”

“You didn’t regenerate Luna.” He stated flatly, “We had to feed you a half dozen healing potions, and there were still a couple of wounds that still didn’t heal up.”

That sounded... well likely really. She had felt Selene strain at the end, and she could only feel her presence on the very edge of her consciousness. Her regeneration had depended on Selene’s influence, without her she was just another unicorn, “So where are they? Am I all horribly scarred now or something?”

“Your leg.” He stated flatly.

She levitated her covers upwards, clicking her tongue as she saw the long, hairless line down the side of her right aftleg. The leg itself felt weak and painful, Luna trying to extend it and finding the sensation dull and sluggish.

“Ebony said you shouldn’t use your magic.”

“I know my limits. My magic is fine.” And Luna was truly grateful for that. Physical prowess was still new, and she took a lot of pride in her magic. She was proud of how it had held up against the zebra shaman, obviously a master of her art. Even if Luna had numerous advantages, she had still taken on an acknowledged expert and won, “Honestly Swift, stop fussing over me. You’re such a girl sometimes.”

He went to open his mouth, shocked into silence as she slid her body out from under the covers and took a cautious step down upon the ground. He gave a disapproving glance but she was nothing if not adventurous, putting her full weight down upon her front legs and wincing as they protested. Her head swum a little but she persisted, letting her backlegs down...

As expected, her right aftleg collapsed under her with barely any resistance at all. Swift Crimson, bless, ran forward to catch her but she had expected it. Her magic encased the leg, supported it as she regained her balance once more. Swift Crimson stopped mid tackle, relieved for a second before becoming angry again, “Luna! Get back in bed!”

“I’ve got this.” She stated confidently as she closed her eyes and let her magic flow once again. She cast a basic scrying spell along with a couple of analysis charms, letting them sink down through her body...

Her leg was gone. They were right. She had known it likely to be bad, Star Swirl having broken it in almost their first exchange and the splinting she had applied not nearly enough to save the weakened limb from catastrophic damage. The muscle hadn’t healed, it was still shredded, the bone failing to set. Her lack of feeling save the dull ache suggested she had suffered serious nervous damage, “Well... balls.”

“What?”

“You’re going to have to chop my leg off.”

He stomped the floor lightly, clearly losing his temper now, “Be serious Luna!”

“I am. It’s useless, and it’s just gonna get infected.” She was quite impressed and surprised how well she was taking it, but then it was just the logical choice, “I can just create a new one with shadow matter.”

“It’s not funny!” His voice dropped, averting his eyes and pouting, “I hate that stuff...”

Ugh, he was such a child! “Well I’m sorry if my choice of prostheses doesn’t meet your approval. I know, maybe I can just get a peg leg. Add an eyepatch and I can dress up as Pipsqueak.”

He growled, stepping angrily towards her, “Luna!”

“Stop yelling at me! I’m fine, and you’re a... fusspot!” She stubbornly held his gaze, “Once again, I’m the only one with the remotest shred of composure. Some of us aren’t so fragile that we go belly up at the first sign of battle, unlike some I know.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

She laughed in his face, her expression smug and insulting, “Great save there by the way. You come in, make a big speech, and then go down in one shot from a zebra half your size. Great job Swift, well done.”

He tensed dangerously, his face averted and his voice high and tight, “I thought you were going to die! Why can’t you take that fucking seriously!?”

She gasped as he grabbed her by her shoulders, taken off guard by his sudden advance. She didn’t like it, the pressure of his hooves hard, almost painful. His face was too close, Luna averting her gaze before their lips could meet. She was embarrassed, at a disadvantage. It wasn’t right, “Let... let go Swift...”

He relaxed his grip a little, looking ready to cry now, “Luna... I fucking love you. I can’t see you hurt like that, I really fucking can’t.”

“You’re... ready to cry Swift? Heh, you’re such a wuss.” She pushed him away, trying her best to regain her composure. She was angry that he thought... this appropriate. That he could make her embarrassed like this. She hated being made to feel vulnerable, especially now, “Maybe if you didn’t go and get yourself captured like a doofus I wouldn’t have to, ‘great knight’.”

His expression grew cold, his stance rigid, “Well almost getting killed didn’t affect your personality at all. You’re still a fucking bitch.”

“And you’re still a crybaby! Crybaby Swi... yow!”

She paused mid sentence, her words wiped from her mind. All she could do is stare at Swift incredulously, not quite sure what just happened. It slowly processed as he turned away and headed towards the door, Luna yelling after him, “You hit me!”

He paused, turning angrily to her, “Yeah, a lot of ponies are doing that lately. Maybe it’s something to do with being a MASSIVE FUCKING BITCH!”

“Yeah, well you’re a jerk! Come back!” She pouted angrily as he continued towards the exit, hating to be ignored like this, “I’m breaking up with you! You hear me! Come back and face me like a stallion you coward! You coward! Crybaby Swift!”

He closed the door on her. Her words echoing into nothing.

She bit her lip, pouted, considered stomping the floor (her hooves still hurt). Eventually she spotted a book on Equestrian politics that Radhi had given her, waxing lyrical about how it was an interesting read. She had found it dreadfully boring, and unfortunately that meant it had to die.

She took it with her telekinesis, screamed her frustration and slammed it into the floor several times, forcing it in several directions before its spine ruptured and paper flew everywhere. One settled at her hooves, showing a picture of Princess Luna standing beside Pipsqueak and the other children on the deck of a great pirate ship.

It wasn’t Radhi’s book.

“Oh no! Oh no, I didn’t mean to!” She collected up all the papers she could, cursing Swift Crimson all the more for moving her books around without her permission. She had been certain she had put this away safely before she had left, why couldn’t he tidy up properly if he was going to borrow her things? She felt her heart race as papers flew, rotating around her head as she took each and filed it back in the right order. A rip in the page here, a smudge on the page there... a couple torn completely in half, Luna placing the two pieces together and attempting to disguise the tear best she could, sealing them with a simple repair spell...

Fortunately she had gotten good at this, most of the books they had found damaged in some way or another. Clean, dry and with the ink intact it was a fairly simple process, Luna eventually sighing with relief and laying the book out in front of her. She relaxed and read the words, letting them sink into her.

Daytime sleeps and dreams of night
while beauty flanks your bed.
White-Blue stars soar skyward yearning
love your heart misread.
Night burns bright and blends with shadow,
fills your heart with gloom.
Princess Luna, roamer of dreams,
steal my heart and bloom. . .

Luna closed her eyes and let sleep take her.

~

She stepped out onto the sands of the zebra wasteland, once more among the Markerstones of the Stars. She wondered sometimes why she gravitated here, whether because of Selene or some quality in herself. Even back when she was a ‘mere’ dreamwalker she had visions of this place. She had to admit that here, in this place, with the demonic visages of tyrants and killers... she wasn’t afraid. She felt a kin to dark, twisted, broken things.

She took a breath, wiggling her back leg. It was good as it ever was in this place, something to be thankful for. She looked around to check she was alone before speaking in the language of the old zebra, firm and commanding, “Aphesad, Aphesad. Watcher in the dark, master of the shadows. Come forth before me.”

“Well, the small princess returns. A pleasure as always.”

Luna turned as the zebra stepped out, clad in black and red scales and wearing a spiked crown. She saluted him respectfully, folding a hoof across her chest, “Aphesad, thank you for receiving me.”

“You have fought a mighty battle, I can tell.” Aphesad spoke, his tones smooth and refined, “Did you cross horns with your sister?”

Luna rolled her eyes, feeling her cheeks blush a little. Why did that have to be his first question? “Crossing horns turned out to be a bad idea.”

“She is already skilled enough to beat you? She cannot have opened herself up fully to Charaxes, you have techniques to deal with...”

“She tackled me.” Luna spoke ruefully, “She bundled me to the ground and punched me until I couldn’t see straight.”

Aphesad actually laughed at this, making her feel even worse. His deep tones rumbled across the sands, cheerful guffaws finally silenced as he turned a broad smile to her, “Little Princess, shadow matter is many things, but it is not dense. This is a major disadvantage in close combat against one the same size as you.”

“I realise that now...” She muttered, not wanting to go over this again, “Trade for trade I guess. I beat her soundly last time.”

“Then maybe it is time for peace between you, now that you are equal? Luna and Celestia together were many times more powerful than they were apart. The same is true now.” Aphesad angled his head proudly, his mouth pulled into a toothy, unnatural grin, “Our dragonequis were false leads, I realise this now more than over. It will be union of the Pony Princesses and the best of the Star Demons that will create the ultimate being, and for you to be a Princess there must be two.”

Luna didn’t see it that way. Celestia had been a terrible sister, and regardless had ruled alone for a thousand years. She had ruled alone herself, and she thought she had done pretty well, “I don’t need her. I can ascend with the help of my current friends.”

“No.” He spoke firmly, “There must be two. Celestia was but a pale reflection of her true self without her sister, forced to hide behind guards and her ever present apprentices. Together they were gods themselves, the elements of harmony infusing the core of their being, easily able to shape reality to their whim!”

“Well it doesn’t matter what you think. She’s firmly opposed to me now, working for that demon killing bastard Starhammer.”

Aphesad stared coldly at her, “Then you must kill him.”

“Oh, is that all? It’s not that easy. He has an army.”

“Challenge him to single combat. Such stallions cannot resist an invitation to test their honor.” He nodded gravely at her, “One of you will fall, and the minds of the peons will be united behind the victor. Such a grand story will cement the rise of either one of you. Neither of you can avoid this.”

Luna hesitated. And it wasn’t because it was stupid, or impossible... it was because she wasn’t sure if she could win.

Behind all the bluster... she was a child compared to him. Star Swirl had proven that there were weaknesses in her deity, and Starhammer’s little sidekick was quite possibly a more powerful magic user.

“I’m not sure if I can beat him.”

“Then you must give up. You cannot defeat him militarily, so you must finish this personally.”

He was right. For all her talk her children weren’t a military. They were outnumbered and outgunned, “That’s why I need the Black Phylactery.”

“Yes little princess.”

“And Selene.” Luna nodded firmly to the demon prince in front of her, “Take me to her.”

~

Selene lay there amid the rocks, shivering and shaking, a blob of blackness unable even to take form. Luna sensed her fear and distress, her confusion.

Luna advanced cautiously, extending a hoof. She sighed in relief as Selene responded, surging forward to press against her hoof, sliding up her leg. She felt them connect, sending forth all the sincerity she could muster, “Thank you for protecting me.”

Selene sang back at her, pleased at her presence, begging her for food like a baby bird. She sighed and gave in, figuring she deserved it. She centred her mind, putting up her mental barriers, sheathing her higher faculties in layers of magical protection. Confident that she was fully protected she cautiously let Selene inside, feeling their bond deepen as the small blob of blackness leached off her magic and emotions. Selene tried to magnify both in her natural greed, Luna’s defences however successfully resisted the attempt. This bond would be on her own terms, “Are you ready Selene?”

~

She gasped as she woke up, frowning and holding her aching head in irritation. She had forgotten what a bad condition she was in...

She ignored the pain, letting Selene cover her as she stepped forward, hard black armor forming over weak flesh. Her nervous system integrated fully with her new body, becoming one. She smiled in satisfaction at her strong muscles, her size and authority, the sheer feeling of power as she let Selene magnify her magic just a little.

She looked down at her leg, sighing as she felt it continue to throb away. She knew she had been right, she couldn’t leave it.

She could easily sever it and stem the bleeding with shadow matter. But that didn’t mean it wouldn’t hurt. She should really call Radhi... but why? She could do this herself, she didn’t need to... look weak in front of him. She was Princess Luna, things like this should be easy for her!

She closed her eyes tight, ignoring the terror that flowed through her. Such emotions were for children, not powerful princesses of the night! She tightened the pressure of her black skin around the top of her ruined leg, waiting until it had gone fully numb. Then she formed her skin into a sharp blade.

Ohhhhh, shit! She couldn’t help bursting into tears, screaming out and swearing sharply as she made the cut. It had been too easy, now Luna was scared that she had made a terrible mistake. She pressed both her magic and the black skin against the wound, waiting for it to regenerate as she tried desperately to calm her breathing, “GAGH! SHIT, SHIT!”

“Luna!” Radhi burst into the room, staring at her with clear concern as she stood there with what must have been a doozy of an expression, “Are you ok?”

She blinked the tears from her eyes as she ejected the offending object from her body and levitated it over, depositing it unceremoniously in front of the zebra, “You... you can get rid of this...”

He went pale, as could be expected really, “Luna... is this your leg?”

“Yeah...”

“Luna, I...” He cracked himself in the face with his own hoof, “I’ve long stopped being surprised by your recklessness. Still... really?”

She grimaced, “It hurts...”

“I’m not surprised. Why...?”

She was not going over this again, “It was broken! It wasn’t going to heal!”

“You...” Radhi sighed, adjusting his glasses and stepping over to her, “I’ll trust your opinion Luna. Still I wished you had asked me first.”

She pouted, having to sink to the floor to combat the wooziness, “And what was your opinion doctor?”

“I... well there was extensive damage. I splinted the bone as best I could, and... attempted to repair the damaged muscle.” He paused, letting his head drop, “It was outside my experience Luna, and Ebony was convinced we needed to cut it off. Can I make an admission, that you likely won’t like?”

She had an idea what this was, “Ok.”

“I got Doctor Fluttershy to look at it.”

“...”

“I trust her. Swift Crimson trusts her. And you were very badly injured.” He took a deep breath, “I like to think Ebony and I could have kept you alive on my own... but not in as good condition.”

Luna honestly wasn’t sure what to say on the subject of Fluttershy. She decided to ignore the topic for now, concentrating on the subject at hand, “And her opinion of the leg?”

“She saved it, more or less. I was in favour of cutting it off too, but Swift Crimson wouldn’t have it. And well... Fluttershy did her best.” He shrugged, “But she said that it was still touch and go whether it would recover.”

“It wouldn’t.”

“Very well. You’re likely better than me at pure biology. You’re alive, that’s what counts.” He sighed looking down at the severed leg and wincing, “Still, doing it without Med-X or anything... let me...”

“No!” She shouted, a little louder than she intended. She didn’t need it, clearly. It was done, and she was still standing. She had taken worse, “I’m not wasting our medical supplies.”

“Luna...”

She averted her eyes from his plaintive look, changing the subject, “What did Fluttershy think? Of me?”

Radhi smiled, warm and genuine, “She thought you were a very brave mare who saved her life and built a wonderful haven for lost children. You went back for her Luna. You almost died because of it.”

“I did didn’t I?” She let her head fall, overwhelmed by it all. Fluttershy... she didn’t know what to say really, though she didn’t think of the mare as an enemy. She didn’t like to be thhat vulnerable in front of a stranger, still she couldn’t blame them for calling for her, “Just make sure she doesn’t go blabbing.”

“I honestly think she understands Luna.”

“I hope so.” Fluttershy did have plenty of reason to be grateful. Luna didn’t regret saving her though. She couldn’t let her die.

Not because she was Fluttershy. Not even because she had been kind to her kids.

Because she was alone. She would never leave anypony to die alone, never leave them out in the darkness. She knew what it was to be helpless.

~

With her telekinesis the latch was only too easy, Luna never more glad for the lack of unicorn proofing the zebra around here saw the need to provide. She slipped inside with cautious silence, fluttering her still clumsy wings a little but otherwise keeping them firmly plastered to her side. The injury to her shoulder and forehead, not to mention indirectly the bullet in her flank, were all proof of the folly of thinking a set of feathers made her a pegasus.

The room was of medium size, a well furnished bedroom of fine yet not too fine quality. Rich enough to have something worth taking, poor enough that they wouldn’t have guards... hopefully.

She felt a little twinge in her heart as she looked over to the bookcase. Books. She had liked books... she crept over, looking at the titles in growing awe. They had works she had never heard of, on Equestria, on magic...

Her rumbling stomach made her most pressing concern clear however.

She used her telekinesis to open all the drawers, looking for something, anything to alleviate her hunger. She hadn’t eaten for days, and she knew that with her wounds and the stress it was getting to her. It was getting harder and harder to think straight, and she knew she couldn’t fight. Bullets went through her just as easy as before, and she was a much bigger target now.

She gasped in delight as she pulled a bag of zebra candies from a drawer, tipping the bag up and gulping down a few hungrily. It wasn’t much but it was well appreciated, Luna gazing down at the depressingly small amount left in the bag. She lifted up another with her magic and took a small, careful bite, gazing longingly at the filling. She had forgotten what chocolate tasted like.

The sound of the door opening caused her to spin around, pressing the bag tight to her chest as she backed away. A zebra stepped through and fear seized her, her hooves freezing in place. The zebra turned and looked back with similar fright, his mouth dropping open. He was young, small, soft looking, hardly any threat to her. Yet if he opened his mouth to scream she knew they would all come running.

And just as Luna was certain he intended to shout... his mouth closed, gulping down his fear and looking at the bag, “Are you... eating my...?”

She hissed at him, clumsily attempting to back away towards the window. Her vision swam and her grip faltered, the bag of candy slipping to the floor. She grasped desperately for it but only knocked the little round balls flying, rearing backwards as the zebra advanced to catch one, “Get away!”

He looked at her, confused, a little frightened... but curious, “What are you?”

“I’m bad, evil, dangerous! Get away!” She spoke in a whirl, her hunger gnawing all the more for having been awoken, “Please... get away...”

“Are you hungry?”

He spoke with kindness, enough to strike Luna to the core. Tears filled her eyes as she looked up, a powerful demon summoner meek and broken before this little zebra boy, “Yes...”

“Um... well come with me. I’ll make you something from the kitchen. You can’t just eat a bag of sweets and expect it to last you.” He rubbed the back of his head with a hoof, “My master won’t be back for hours, so...”

She didn’t understand. Was this a trap? “Why?”

He looked at her, surprised by her plaintive question. After a moment he gave an uncomfortable, embarrassed look, “The holy books say that to leave someone hungry in the cold is to invite the icy darkness into your own heart. Um... and maybe you don’t know, but this is actually the house of healing for this village. And you’re obviously wounded.”

She didn’t understand. The other zebra had read those same books, followed the holy flame. They all told her that those words spoke only of her sin, and how it needed to be cleansed from this world, “I’m evil... I’m this... I’m not like you...”

“No. You’re not.” He answered forcefully, lifting his head proudly, “You’re hungry... injured, clearly exhausted. I’m apprentice to a shaman, and I swore an oath to care for those who need my help.” He gave her a questioning look, “Are you... dangerous?”

She considered this, “Yes.”

He paled a little, still his voice only shook for a second, “Um... to me?”

She could only answer honestly, her voice cracking, “I hope not.”

He chuckled, kind and empathic. He nodded his head, his gentle eyes full of understanding, “You look like you’ve had quite the journey. Please, try and get some rest. I will make some food for you, dress those wounds.”

She felt the tears flow, unable to stop them. She was too weak, too exhausted to find the will. She let them drop, down her cheeks pain filling her chest, “Thank you...”

“Uh... no problem...” He rubbed the back of his head, clearly embarrassed, “It’s not every day an alicorn sneaks into my room and tries to rob me. I guess you could say I’m a little curious.”

She smiled back at him, already liking this zebra, “I’ve learned... curiosity is a dangerous thing...”

“If we never took the chance on something dangerous, then where would we be?” He gave her nervous smile, “I’m... ah, going to see what we have in the cupboards. Please wait here... and use the bed if you want. Aha...”

He departed, Luna looking out after him for a few seconds before taking him up on that offer. She rested her weary body down upon the mattress, feeling for just a moment the comfort and security of home. And for the first time...

She felt like she might have just made a friend.

~

“Radhi...”

He gave her a kind smile, trotting over and taking her head in his hooves, holding her close to his chest, “You should really show this side of you to Swift Crimson.”

“No... not him...” She gritted her teeth as she squeezed out all of her tears and pain, her throat heaving in desperate gasps and sobs. She didn’t understand where it had all come from, why it was only now that it really dawned on her, “I almost died Radhi! They... really hurt me... I was so scared...”

“I know...”

“I... I thought they had killed him.” Luna felt her heart ache at the memory, of watching Swift going down. Of being broken, injured, unable to do anything as that zebra slammed her hoof into the back of his neck and dropped him limp to the ground, “I opened myself up to Selene more than ever before. I didn’t care if I didn’t come back from it.”

“You know my feelings on this Luna. You have to be careful.”

“I remembered Melody Waters. Remembered finding her...”

“Luna...”

“I still want to kill them all. I want to fly over all those pathetic little villages and burn them to the ground, let them suffer in their hypocrisy, feel what they inflicted on so many others.”

“Luna please...”

She gritted her teeth, unable to let the emotions go. She wished she could, she wished she come be the better mare. Unfortunately she wasn’t sure if the better mare would really let them get away with it, “They did horrible things to her Radhi. She was the kindest, most gentle mare I’ve ever met, and she died screaming, alone...”

“And those who did it are dead.”

She glared at him through the tears, “You disapproved.”

Radhi shook his head, cradling her in his hooves, “I disapproved because what it would do to you. What it will do to Selene. You’re still angry about your own experiences Luna, and by hoarding all this wrath and hurt... you’re kind, and clever, and funny and sweet. And more than anything, I’m afraid that will end up buried under this desire for vengeance.”

She closed her eyes, gulping back her emotions, “I let Dust, Zenai and Ace in didn’t I?”

“That was a good start, yes. And its born fruit, all three have proved extremely useful.”

Another uncomfortable, far too common emotion lanced through her. Guilt, “How is Ace Gold?”

Radhi looked deeply uncomfortable at the question, never a good sign, “He... he was hurt quite badly. He’s alive, and healthy...”

She hated dodging around the question, “Answer concisely Radhi.”

“Very well, no point drawing it out...” Radhi sighed, “His eyes were damaged beyond any ability to heal. He’ll never see again.”

“...”

“He’s not... taking it well. Understandably I suppose.”

“Any ability to heal?”

Radhi looked up at her with concern as she rose, “Luna?”

Luna smiled, filled with vigour once more. She hated being helpless, and conversely more than anything she revealed in an opportunity to make a difference. Not just for herself, but for Ace Gold, and for all her children, “I want to meet with Fluttershy. I want her to tell me about megaspells.”

Radhi sighed deeply, “I feared as much... I’ve already spoken to her Luna, she’s not a unicorn. She can’t tell you much.”

“Not much is fine. You forget who you’re talking to Radhi.” She grinned wide, using her telekinesis to pull several tomes from the shelves and display each to Radhi in turn before dropping them in a neat pile in front of her, stepping atop them with a single proud hoof. She was full of confidence, knowing exactly what to do now, “I just confronted a peerless zebra shaman in single combat, I use degree level textbooks as light reading! I am the greatest pony mage living, and I only wish Twilight Sparkle were here to challenge me for the all time prize!”

Radhi gave her a warning look, “I admire your dedication, but don’t set your sights too high Luna. You’re talking about the kind of magic that takes a lifetime to master, and disappointment... disappointment drives you to do things like this.” His expression became gentle, pleading, “We don’t think any less of you for being injured. For letting Swift Crimson and Ace Gold get caught. For letting Ace Gold get hurt. You don’t need to prove yourself with the impossible.”

She seethed internally, blocking him out. She didn’t care what he thought. Her eyes were on the future, “I intend to heal the wasteland Radhi. The least I can do is heal a pair of eyes.”

“Luna...”

Luna wasn’t listening, her eyes travelling to her computer. A familiar tone played, a small picture of a smiling sun appearing at the bottom of the screen, “Enough. I need to work. Call Fluttershy down to the library.”

He gazed at her assessing for a couple of moments before nodding reluctantly, moving away, “Whenever you need me.”

She watched him go, his heart obviously heavy. With concern. With anger?

She had dismissed both of her friends pretty roughly really. That was becoming a habit.

Swift Crimson and Radhi were her best friends, who had stuck with her through thick and thin. Swift Crimson loved her, with an honesty far outstripping his years. Perhaps she lacked that. Perhaps she was immature. That where they had grown up through their trials and weakness, she hid her childish heart away where none could stab at it. It was unfair, and unhealthy, but a lifetime of hiding behind lies and bravado was hard to break. She couldn’t open herself up to them, found it impossible to take such emotions as love and affection seriously. She joked about them at best, found herself retreating back from ‘sappiness’.

More and more she was feeling that was a weakness.

She sighed and moved over to her computer, feeling glad that it was her calling. She would know what to say, she would know how to make her feel better, “Hello Sunshine Ivory. Checking up on me?”

“I am! I heard you were hurt, and you know I do worry.”

Luna smiled, reassured by her concern, “I’m healing up.” A note of concern passed through her mind, “Does everypony know that I got beaten up?”

“Actually, they’re very impressed. As I said, your legend is growing greater with every engagement. Kunani is an experienced shaman, and Star Swirl is gaining her own fame. To drive them both off in defence of your children, even after being heavily injured, paints you as a pony worth following.”

“It didn’t quite go like that...”

“I have not heard any different.” Sunshine Ivory stressed, “Unfortunately, that now leads us to one unfortunate truth.”

The truth was always unfortunate, “What’s that?”

“Starhammer is a demon hunter, invading your territory. Neither of you can retreat from this battle with your reputation intact, and dodging around the issue wastes time. You need to take control of these lands and Starhammer’s army, lead them against Caesar and Star Fall before their manipulations plunge this land into bloody war.”

Luna knew all this. It was why she had attacked that trading outpost with those mercenaries. It was why she hadn’t already bunkered down or fled before Starhammer’s army. It was why she had joined up with Themba’s little conspiracy, even though he sickened her personally, “I’m working on it.”

“You need to move quickly. Starhammer intends to march on Sanatora tomorrow, and if he finds the book he will become almost unstoppable.”

Tomorrow? Luna couldn’t say that filled her with confidence. She was hardly ready for a battle in the state she was now... but it couldn’t be helped, and she had a few cards left to play, “Just leave it to me. I won’t disappoint you Sunshine Ivory!”

“I know you won’t. I’ll be watching out for you Luna. Go show them what you’re made of.”

___________________________________________

Princess Luna Level up – 14

Trait discovered – Fast Metabolism
Your metabolic rate is twice normal. This means that you are much less resistant to radiation and poison, but your body heals faster. You gain +2 to your Healing Rate, but your radiation and poison resistances start at 0%.

Quest perk discovered - Star Child Level 3 – “And you will help, more than you’ve ever dreamed.”
Congratulations, you have a demonic entity from outer space living in your head! You’re coming close to accessing the full power of your symbiosis, though with every step the mental repercussions become more pronounced. You get an extra +4 bonus to magic (equal to four points of intelligence), an extra +2 to intelligence, an extra +4 to your healing rate and -1 point to your perception.

Quest perk discovered – Stone Hearted – “I’ve got to ask them if her tears were made of icicles”
You’re not one to be easily moved by emotion. You gain a +6 to mental resistance, but a -1 to charisma.

Perk Gained – Mind for Magic Level 2 – “I actually studied gravity spells, thinking they’ll be on my test!”
You have a great memory and an instinctual understanding of spellcraft. Your list of signature spells is increased by 10% and your list of memorized subjects is increased by 20%

This fanfiction is based on Fallout Equestria by Kkat, it is highly recommended that you read that first for context. Reading Fallout Equestria: Pink Eyes by Mimezinga will help understanding, but isn’t required.
Many of the characters and much of the setting are not mine but are on loan from the very awesome Kkat, or are taken from My Little Pony - Friendship Is Magic by Hasbro. This story makes no pretentions at being canon with either, and is merely a ‘what-if’ set in the same world.
If you enjoy Fallout Equestria Side Stories, you will want to check the Fallout Equestria Side Stories post on Equestria Daily and the Fallout Equestria Side Stories thread on Ponychan.

Author's Note:

Princess Luna : The Different http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nlww15DpyYs

Star Swirl : Rabbit Heart http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GF6kBNLTvaU

Sunshine Ivory The Phoenix http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5hDZbroaQDc

Comments

[Not so New Brony]

Well, I got my answer to my previous comment...and I'm left even more confused than before. I love it

[Kexisoc]

So if I am to understand, the 'Luna' leading the Dusklight orphans is in fact a unicorn, and right before she was about to be lynched as a child she bonded with another Star Demon named Selene granting her the physical form of Equestria's lunar princess.

This completely explains why Luna here wishes to read every text relating to her, so she can emulate the real princess as best she can. Though as she observed herself, Luna falls risk of buying into her own farce at times. Her actions of massacring villages so horrifically for maiming a few children is understandable, given the glimpse of Luna's similar experience. Not right for her to string the adults on walls so barbarically, but understandable. For it was Luna's early near death is what drove her to rally this small army for noble purposes, and yes, even cull her villages owing taxes to never dare practice child abuse or slavery in her presence.

Still, this is also proof Luna is much more emotionally vulnerable than Star Swirl, namely regarding her symbiosis with this Selene. As was stated in past chapters, these 'Star Demons' take the best and worst traits of their host, and Luna had to be consciously aware not to let Selene consume her greed. And being driven to find the Black Book hidden in the ruins in hopes of fully ascending (insanity that comes with the book none-withstanding)... and keeping healing Ace Gold's blindness in mind.

It's quite ... - inducing watching Luna act so... childish around her younger cohorts when all the chapters before she acted so posh and haughty around Dust and Zenai. Given that this is not the real Luna we know, this alicorn does not wish to show what she considers weakness to Dust yet. I assume from her open mannerisms that a close circle of the children are in the know of who she truly is, Rahdi and Swift Crimson namely.

Sunshine Ivory, I knew it! You're playing both sides! Was it she who gave Luna her Star Demon? She did so with Star Swirl. Devious. And Brilliant. If Luna loses, Sunshine still has her alliance with Tarishi/Starhammer to topple Caesar. If Starhammer falls, Sunshine has Luna's support to destabilize Caesar's regime. All the while when both armies clash it out on Sanatora tomorrow, she'll be steps ahead getting that book since she's pushing both sides to that object.

*Sigh* And the NCR thinks that they have problems...