Starlight's New Drinking Buddy

by Heartland Picker

The Fun Begins.....

Starlight's New Drinking Buddy
The Fun Begins.....

Dusk was Ben's favorite time of the day, especially during autumn under a clear sky. God, this reminds me of home. There was something about the sight of the sky that just made it breathtaking: just how the Western horizon would shift from pale blue to different shades of orange with the sun looking more like a half-ripe nectarine as the minutes passed on. As you'd shift your sight towards the East, there would be a gentle transition to pinks and magentas, followed by royal dark purples and blues at the opposite horizon. Then it was even more stunning with stray patches of clouds: they would have lavender bottoms with the cumulus having golden outlines as though they belong on the ceiling of the Sistine Chapel.

This was lost on Starlight though, as she was a bit more than irritated with her unceremonious boot to the rump out of the school. And by Twilight no less! As they moved through town, the only thing she was concerned about was why she even agreed to this whole thing in the first place. Seriously, how hard is it to say 'no' to this load of horseapples!? I could just be working on that paperwork at the moment for Celestia's sake! Her irritation was too obvious for Ben to miss.

He began to consider how to ease her into the whole thing. By second nature, he had the intention of ensuring she wasn't doing this on an empty stomach (which he was guessing was the case, considering the argument he heard outside the school). His past experience with hungry drinking had engrained itself into his mind too much. Oddly enough, even to this day he couldn't make sense of how he was able to remember how things happened when he did that. Either way, he learned fast enough that drinking on an empty stomach tends to make the rest of the day and night suck. Not to mention the killer hangover the following morning, and even here with magic around there's still no cure for a hangover. He had often wondered whether or not there really was such a cure, but the equines preferred that the drunks learn from their stupidity, or if it was just more fun to laugh at it. He wouldn't be bothered if both were true. It's like being the one guy that sneaks up behind a horse: you either learn from it or you're branded as the village idiot, thus becoming the local "entertainment".

It was in this musing that he realized his unintended pun, and began to chuckle.

Starlight, broken from her own reverie, couldn't help but notice. "Okay, do I want to know what you find amusing?" she questioned, her left eyebrow cocked high.

Ben thus put an end to his momentary immaturity. "Oh, it's nothing. Just my mind playing jokes on me again."

Starlight's face softened to portray a lace of curiosity. It was now that she noticed that they had arrived at their destination. Now that her interest had been piqued, she felt the need to ask. "Is this another one of your weird thoughts that you occasionally let me in on, or is it something from your home world again?"

Ben paused for a moment when something caught the corner of his eye, particularly a hint of a purple-furred, horned pony face on the top of the roof at the neighboring building. Really Twi, you're still paranoid about what she might pull? Then he recalled what he had been told about when Twilight left Starlight with the rest of her Ponyville posse while on a royal business trip. Guess I can't blame her. Nobody's perfect, but God knows what kind of devious stuff she might try to pull. Okay Sparkybuns, I'll let you have this. "Might be better if I try to explain this over the burgers and the first round."

---

After taking an open booth and ordering their meals, both took closer note of the crowd. The bar was about the size of what you'd expect in one of the old settlements of the little towns that popped up in the Old West. It didn't take up a lot of the street front, but it was at least four times deeper. Berry Punch was on bartender duty tonight, and was in the middle of pouring draft beer for Davenport, who looked like he had a particularly rough day. There were a few others that Ben couldn't remember their names, but they were grouped up and in the middle of general discussion, or "solving the world's problems" as Ben would call it. Off in the back was a small open space with another bunch of ponies, who were in the middle of shooting darts and talking smack. Off in a booth a bit further down was Big Mac and Sugar Belle, who were both enjoying glasses of red wine, smiling, winking at each other, and being all that other sappiness.

Then they noticed Rarity at a small corner table, casually sipping a top-shelf brandy whilst, to nobody's surprise, doodling on a napkin. Ben could relate to this. When inspiration hits, you better grasp it while it's still fresh on the noggin. He couldn't count the number of times that he thought of some kind of artistic flair that would look good on his archtop guitars, only to realize the next day that he never bothered to draft anything up for execution. He'd mentally kick himself for that on a routine basis.

It was then that his train of thought was broken by Starlight. "So, what were you laughing about earlier?" she asked. It took Ben a bit of mental churning to recall what exactly she was talking about.

"Oh, something crossed my mind on the way over here. I was considering the possibility of whether or not your kind ever developed a cure for hangovers. I figured either way you'd rather hold out just for the sake of entertainment or punishment. It seemed like letting an idiot figure out whether or not it's a good idea to spook a horse from behind after being kicked the first time or two. You always get kicked if you do that."

Starlight giggled at this, considering how that might look from the sidelines. She replied, "Hehe, that's not usually the case here, but I can think of at least three ponies that might give a funny demonstration of that lesson." She thought of one recent friend in particular, considering that she built her own home out of a cave of all things.

It was Ben's turn to be curious now. "Three? I can see the two elder Apple siblings doing that, but who else?" He just couldn't imagine Applebloom having that kind of strength in her hind legs at the moment.

Starlight then gave him a smug grin. She said, "Oh, you might now know about this. You remember my friend Maud, right? Well, she actually moved here in the past year. Her home isn't in town. She actually lives outside of town limits in an Everfree cave. She carved out some of the rock walls with her own hind legs."

Ben's jaw had dropped from that last detail. Dear God, what kind of place did my ass land in!? Busting bedrock just with the kick of a leg! Please don't say any more: my mind is already conjuring up what I'd look like if I say the wrong thing to her!

Starlight noticed his subtle internal freakout and began to laugh a bit more. "Bahaha! You should see the look on your face! Haha! Don't think about it too much. It's tough to get her mad enough to do what you're thinking. From what Rarity has told me, Maud prefers psychological warfare." This at least got Ben to relax a bit.

Thankfully, the next moment their food had been brought to them along with their respective drinks. Ben settled for starting both himself and Starlight with a brown wheat beer: a maple-caramel flavor with mildly bitter undertones. There is no way I was going to let her try the really dark Guinness-like ale: that would defeat the purpose of this evening. He took a look at their respective meals as well. I still can't believe my luck that they're not bothered by preparing meals for omnivores. One would think they'd chase you out of town for that. Granted, Twilight had explained in the past that some carnivores would pass through town every so often in the past, and it only got more common as Equestria began hosting foreigners from Griffonstone, Mount Eris, and the Dragonlands. Then there was also the obvious fact that ponies kept dogs and cats as pets, so it took a bit to dawn on him that they at least had some kind of market for meats.

It was then that Ben noticed Twilight slipping in. He could tell she was still trying to be discrete, but figured she was more concerned about Starlight catching her than anyone else.

So from here, Ben and Starlight settled in to eating, drinking, and just making small talk about.

A couple drinks later...….

Starlight was at least smiling gently at this point, as the atmosphere allowed her to loosen up. "You know, I've had common beer like Crystal Mountain Light, but I didn't care for it. Yet here I am, enjoying another without that bitter taste that makes my lips pucker," said Starlight.

Ben then responded, "it all depends on who the brewer is. You have to search around for sweet brown ales like this. The few occasions that I could find a flavor like this, it was usually a 'hole-in-the-wall' microbrewery. Some of the main labels were making them for a premium, but they just didn't have that soft-bodied texture that hit the spot."

Now neither of them were being affected by the spirits yet, so full conscious thought was still active. Starlight then gave him an impish grin. Let's see if I can rile him up a bit. "Sounds like you drank more than you should have just to get to that conclusion. Any good stories?"

Ben gave her the look that a parent would give to a smart-aleck son that just knew how to push their buttons while pointing his finger at her. "Not today missy. The point of this is to make fun life stories for you. For that, we need to keep drinking."

Starlight then asked "What did you have in mind? I'm not just going to simply sit here and just drink because you tell me to. I usually go for a challenge, if I'm being honest."

Ben answered "Let me think." He recalled some of the games that he and his friends would play when they needed to unwind with some booze. There was the classic Beer Pong, but he figured that Berry Punch wouldn't appreciate the bar being rearranged just for the sake of having a table large enough for a decent game. There was also flip cup, but Ben was then reminded that plastics were considered a luxury in this universe. He glanced at the dart board, which was still in use, so that was also out.

Then he remembered one of his favorites: the shotgun game. It was one of those games that could be played practically, and he remembered that the locals did use aluminum on a regular basis, while specifically remembering that cans were preferred over longnecks for their recyclability. There was the added plus that half of his best drinking memories had involved that game. Although, this will be more fun if I get Big Mac involved with the game.

He said "How about a drinking game? There's always good fun in challenging friends with who can hold their liquor, and I have a good one in mind to start us off: the Shotgun game. First I'd like to call someone in to join us. Hey, Macintosh!"

Mac's focus on Sugar Belle had thus been broken. He already knew who was calling. "Yo Ben. How's life treatin' ya?"

Ben cordially replied "Oh, it's been fair, but not important. I need a little help here. Starlight's new to fun drinking, so I need some help with showing her the ropes. Care to join me for two rounds of Shotgun?"

Mac smirked at this. "No Applejack around this weekend to rant about it tomorrow morning, but let me run it by Sugar Belle."

Sugar Belle, however, had decided to sneak up on Mac just to hear the conversation (like all women do, just to be nosy). Once everyone noticed, they noticed her 'understanding' expression that said 'oh well, stallions need to have fun too'. "Oh Mac, you don't have to wait on my hoof every second of the evening. Just do it," she said. "I want to see how well you two can hold your liquor."

With Sugar Belle's approval, the guys went ahead and ordered up a six-pack of light beer to kick off the game. Ben started explaining, "okay Starlight, here's how the game works. Tip the can on its side, and then puncture a hole at the bottom of the can just large enough for chugging. When I say 'go', tip it upright to where you can drink from the makeshift drinking hole, pop the top, and just chug the hole thing without spilling. Next you have to balance the can on your shoulder. One thing to keep in mind: any attempt to maintain balance with additional support of any kind automatically results in losing the round. Whoever can avoid losing balance of their can wins."

Starlight then became determined, "Ha! This sounds like a game that Rainbow Dash, Applejack, and Pinkie would likely play. I think I can take this first round without a demo. I'm in!" However, for anypony who knew her well enough, she wasn't one to play the rules the first time around.

A minute later, all three had their beers ready to pop and chug. Ben called out: "Alright, three, two, one, CHUG!" Everyone propped their beers up and started. Granted, Starlight could tell that this kind of beer wouldn't be her favorite any time soon, she understood the point of the game well enough to keep chugging. As she was almost done with drinking hers, the boys were already had their empty vessels on their shoulders. She drained the last of the brew and began balancing the can on her back, maintaining the balance with only a small amount of magic in play which to any normal pony wouldn't be visible.

Unfortunately for her, Ben was known by a few besides herself for having a sharp eye, thus he called her out for it after three seconds. "You cheater! I specifically said no magic or anything! Round's over, no points awarded!"

Starlight became a mix of miffed and stymied by this. "How the heck could you tell that!? I was using light telekinesis for that one!" It was Rarity who, seeing the whole thing, responded with "Haha! He may be a ruffian, but if I had any words to describe him, I wouldn't use the term 'blind' anytime soon! He's a hawk."

After a moment, Ben cordially followed "Why thank you, Rarity. I'll keep that in mind next time I need a simple patch job. Now, as for you, missy. Thanks to your little stunt, we'll do this again." Beers were tipped and opened again. "Three, two, one. GO!"

They went again, and they got the same results, which earned Starlight a stinkeye worse than Applejack's. "Okay, wise-ass. You want to play hardball, then I have a new game for you." At this point, Ben had an evil grin that, off in the realm of chaos, had made Discord's spine tingle. Starlight began to tremble under the gaze. Big Mac, however, started to worry. He knew the punishment that Ben was thinking of, and began to worry for Starlight's sobriety the following morning.

Ben then said, "I will teach you my own variation of this game: the Coachgun challenge."

Author's Note:

CLIFFHANGER!!!!! Muahahahahaha!!!!!

Okay, so I kinda dropped the ball on getting this chapter out. Catching up with things IRL.

Again, criticisms and errors can be pointed out in the comments. Thank you!

Comments

[GoldHeartbell]

Umm okay I'm now scared to continue good job.

[Heartland Picker]

9777129
Then I've done my job. You might be able to guess what part of the challenge is...………….

[TheHardie-Boy]

I want more. This seems good

[Heartland Picker]

9791938
In due time. Have RL to keep up with at the moment.

PS: I'm writing and publishing this story on the fly.

[LightningStrike34]

I really like Ben's Character, and the inclusion of Big Mac and Sugar Belle was a welcomed one. I was glad they played a role outside of Background Ponies.