Tempest Shadow was saved twice by Twilight Sparkle. First from The Storm King, then from punishment for what she had done under his command. It would stand to reason that she feels eternally grateful towards the princess of friendship and promises to do all she can to repay the kindness she has shown her.
But now Tempest, or is it Fizzle Pop, feels like she cannot fulfill that duty to Twilight, at least not while Twilight herself is around her.
I honestly put off watching the movie for so long because I didn't know how I would feel about it. It was better then I thought it would be, but I was most interested in the new character it added to the series. The prevalence of Tempest fics lately has led me to finally decide to do my own. I'm really interested in diving into a not as well defined character for once, so let me know what you think of my interpretation of her. Comments are always welcome, good or bad.
Undermining the drill sergeant is poor form your highness. It takes a staggering amount of energy to keep up that kind of performance.
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And you'd think she'd know that considering her brother. Though she might have had her reasons.
I like this so far! Ill be keeping an eye on this one
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Always appreciated.
I don't think any of my stories have ever gotten to over a hundred views in under twenty-four hours. Not to mention nine likes and around six favs. Thank you so much to everyone.
Ok, you definitely have my attention.
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Great to hear
I like it so far! I really need more Tempest x Twilight in my life so I'll be sure to keep an eye on this fic.
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The attention is been getting so far has been really encouraging. Hopefully it'll stay good for you.
Damn. What bloodly cutie chapter this was. Fizzy and Twi interaction was cutie, now the next chapter, with the date (maybe), I can't wait for it!~
Saturday should be interesting. Also I think if Celestia tried the thing from the beginning there would be a nationwide panic as everypony suddenly concluded the Princess had gone deaf.
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It maybe Celestia planned this whole thing from the beginning.
... Or maybe not, I'm not sure. I really should have watched the movie again before embarking on this little venture.
I like this. Been wanting some good romance of these two. I either haven't seen many or im just not looking hard enough
Either way, thank you.
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There were a lot of them for a little while, but a lot of them were really phoned in. That's kinda why I wanted to write one. Glad to see it's working so far.
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Yeah, they were either forced or they just stopped updating.
Im looking forward to yours. Im sure ill enjoy it no matter what.
I half question if Tempest will hunt Dash down for a brief conversation.
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Oh come on. Do I ever provide a satisfactory conclusion to any of my lose plot threads
Thanks so much for 300 views, and sorry for the extended wait for the third chapter. As always I'll try to do better.
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Mostly I just wonder if Tempest is the type to bother to stick her muzzle in such things. Rarity would definitely interfere for Shy’s own good if she was straight up told that shy would never act on it, but while I’m sure Tempest doesn’t care much about going around another ponies wishes she also might be the type to just leave them to it.
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No spoilers, but I will reveal that the answer to that is a definite... maybe.
Tempest treasurers that dagger it deserves a name.
Love the story so far.
So Rarity is unlikely to spy on them, that still leaves nearly the whole town.
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I feel like spying on tempest would be as dangerous as it is difficult. Also that was an idea I hadn't considered.
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Still taking ideas if you had any
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how about a name from Shakespeare's the Tempest? such as Prospero an exiled duke seeking revenge for his treatment. It could represent what Tempest was feeling during her "exile"? and also her redemption as Prospero destroyed his magic to live in peace at the end of the play.
Or another name I think is even more appropriate is Ariel the sprite of air that served Prospero and was always at his side during his exile. I think that would suit a dagger well considering Tempest has had it for six years.
Just some suggestions hope they help.
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Those are not bad. If I was more of a Shakespeare guy that would be a yes on the spot. That is definitely a more obscure Shakespeare, which is actually a plus to me. I like using references only certain people will get.
Nameless recruit just signed his own death certificate.
You should drop the "and".
It makes it sound like Twilight is saying that she's afraid, and that official business waits for the next day.
It should be "...I'm afraid official request..."
It should be "due"
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I think he will have a name eventually, but you didn't hear that from me
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Got it, thanks.
Man, I wish I could spontaneously improve my own eyesight! Would make things cheaper and easier.
(I really should see the optometrist to update my glasses, since my lenses are like 5 years old now)
Rarity collapsing with a note preemptively attached to herself is just too good! Very Pinkie like, but the contents of the note still keeps it Rarity.
Rarity stole the chapter, but Twilight got close to reclaiming it with her flirting. I like the little part where it says that lidded eyes are something that Twilight has never practiced.
One thing that I've noticed that's pretty small, but will likely irk people that are way more detail oriented than me, is that your ellipses (.....) frequently contain a singular comma in it (...,.).
Pretty good writing. Just be a bit more mindful of the small mechanical stuff, and you'll be golden.
Looking forward to the date between two of the most socially and romanticly awkward mares.
As for the dagger's name, you could reference Firefly, and name it Vera.
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This chapter was fun, and Rarity is one of my favorite characters to write for.
As for the commas, they are actually deliberate. It's meant to symbolize, in some way, the moment when a pause becomes an awkward pause. Although I had never considered that that was a way someone might interpret it. I'm going to have to be more careful about it in the future.
And unfortunately, I never did get into Firefly. A little before my time I think, otherwise that would be a good fit. I suppose I could use it to gain some extra nerd cred if nothing else.
Thanks for reading, I'll try to keep the wait as short as possible. You know, despite the fact that it's already been way too long.
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Oh, and thanks so much for the fav
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Ah, I see. You might want to include that explanation of the commas in your ellipses, in one of your authors notes, so others aren't similarly confused.
It would be mighty shiny if you did include the Firefly reference. Never too late to get into it (alot of Nathan Fillion's roles since then have had references to Firefly (Castle is pretty saturated with them, but they all still work (Halo 3: ODST also has a few, as well as the fact that the squad is basically half of the main cast))).
The final name of Tempest's dagger is purely your decision though.
Good things are worth the wait!
"NANI!?"
Chocolate devouring noises
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Ha!!! And btw, I honestly couldn't decide on how she ended up inside.
Why not make a story about the Storm King? He was even less defined than Tempest.
I’d have gone with Sparks personally. Also ascension instead of assention. Regardless nice to see a new chapter.
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Honestly I had considered both. It honestly came down to what came out as I wrote it. I think Sparks might actually sound more in keeping with Tempest's personality, but Sparky is cuter.
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I can’t argue against that in good faith.
Nice relationship they have. Even makes sense that Shy would adapt to it so easily as she basically has to deal with that level of forwardness from at least 3 of her other friends.
I love this Fluttershy interaction so much. You nailed it!
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Yeah, I like writing for Fluttershy. Glad you liked it.
I’m getting real Tanya the Evil vibes from Tempest’s intro to the survival training.
"A challenge? Or maybe fighting?"
-my brain, years later
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Oh god that has been strong on my "to be read" pile for longer then I care to admit.
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But would a fight really be a challenge to Tempest?
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It’s a good read so long as you don’t mind a main character that has many sociopathic tendencies. It can be odd as well at times as the main character actually refers to their current isekai body in the third person as if to distance themselves from it.