• Member Since 11th Nov, 2018
  • offline last seen March 18th

SC14


Stories about ponies

T

Sweetie Belle can’t take the way her life is going at this point. Her sister abuses her to no end, her friends are detaching themselves from her, and she’s constantly being bullied by Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon. One night, while suffering the blows of her elder sister, the little filly snaps, and retaliates against Rarity, ending with a broken lamp and injured Rarity. Not knowing what to do, she runs away, hoping to escape the wrath of her sibling.

Chapters (27)
Comments ( 86 )

A bit too fast paced in my opinion, but I’ll keep reading. Hope it get’s better from here.

9681578
Thanks for the feed back
I will try to slow it down from here!

9681579
Also, I’d get an editor, just in case, okay?

9681585
Yeah i really should.

I like the actual story and plot, it has a lot of potential and I think I'll continue to follow it. However, it could really use some editing. I hope you can find somebody to help you with this. :twilightsmile:

9682162
Thank you!
I am currently looking for an editor
I hope you choose to follow along!

Well, it’s not that bad. At least you tried.

What song does

ELullaby on the Moon
Luna battles her feelings of remorse, and her terrible mistake, Nighmare Moon.
My Sister Tia · 2.5k words  ·  29  5 · 1.3k views

make you think of?

10082300
Sorry. Thought this was your page.

10082301
That's fine. Thank you for the follow though.

Oh boy!

Are they going to keep her prisoner?

Force her into severe physical labor?

Hold her ransom? If it’s ransom, is Rarity going to refuse to pay?

Comment posted by SC14 deleted Mar 8th, 2020

Applejack is one word in this case. The cereal might be two words.

Does Scootaloo have a crush on Sweetie Belle and just didn’t have the guts to tell her?

Who is the filly that Sweetie Belle is going to meet?

Will the Mane 6 (including a reluctant Rarity), Apple Bllom and Scootaloo are going to search for Sweetie Belle? They are the police should go to the train station and ask the ticket pony where she went.

Is the line from a mob movie? Maybe The Departed or Goodfellas? I haven’t seen Goodfellas, but I should one day.

10131711
Well, two of your predictions were right. I will just let you figure you which ones:raritywink:.
(Also thank you for telling me AppleJack is one word)

10131714
No. but that is a good guess.
My only hint is that it is from a 60's Disney movie.

Are they going to turn Sweetie into a gangster?

10148398
Thank you for that and your continued support of this story!

It could be fast-paced but the story is good, waiting for next chapter also something about the intermission is that I'm not sure Applejack should be the one saying about "It's dangerous" when she walked into the Everfree with a unicorn she knew just a couple of hours ago

10155984
Thank you! I am working on making all of my stories a lot slower.
AppleJack is just worried about them youngins.:raritywink: Thank you for the favorite!

Great chapter!

Are the police going to focus more on arresting Rarity and a possible trial and pay less attention to finding Sweetie Belle?

10182697
Thank you again. And that is very possible.

Well, things are being tied, waiting for next chapter and good work.

I just wonder, in a world of magic, could they not use some spell to find her?

10221345
Thank you!

10221548
That is a good point and I have thought about it. I think, they can't magically track her unless, they put a tracking spell on her before she left.

Great chapter!

Will Twilight, Rainbow, Pinkie, Fluttershy, and(especially Rarity blame Applejack for the “anonymous tip”?

It won’t be long until the abuse story spreads like a wildfire and it may overshadow the news of Sweetie Belle’s disappearance.

10251092
Thanks again! (You are spot on yet again)

Good chapter as always... The power of news is a big gun.

Great chapter!

Is Rarity going to get rid of any evidence that can tie back to abuse and thus fooling her friends and making Applejack and the police look bad?

10296109
It's looking that way isn't it?
Thanks again!

That is the problem with the technology of MLP, they have trains and skyscrapers but they don't have a TV or a radio, that we managed to see, I still have the headcanon of Gamer Luna

10296780
Yeah, I guess it wasn't completely required, I probably could have wrote the radios out. but I feel like it is better this way.

Great dark chapter!

Is Walker going to be Sweetie’s first kill?

10299600
Possibly :raritywink:.
Thanks again!

I'm confused. Why would Rarity want to be mean to Sweetie Belle? Why would anyone want to be cruel to the perfect Unicorn filly?

10316856
The second chapter explains it best but, without going into too much detail, their parents died and Rarity turned to alcohol which made her abusive.

Login or register to comment