• Published 5th Jun 2019
  • 15,409 Views, 872 Comments

That Time I Became a Friendship Bomb - Carmine Craft



Peter was a responsible college student, and what better reward for his efforts than a one way ticket to Equestria? Wait what? Now he has to get used to the land of happy go lucky ponies. He, now she, first has to get her new hooves under her first.

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Chapter 2: Why Does Everything Taste Like Friendship

Peter-, he, no that's not right, I? I woke up slowly, shaking my head. That was an odd dream, and what's with me referring to myself in the third person? I heard what sounded like crumbling coming from above me, and felt something light and flakey accumulating on my forearms. I opened my eyes, and to my confusion, I saw light blue flakes of something raining from my forehead, now wrinkled in confusion, which seemed to only dislodge more of them. Oh great, someone smashed some candy on my forehead, again... I sighed, stupid college parties, friggen Alex. I grumbled.

I shifted about on my bed clenching my fingers as I yawned. I could swear I heard a light twinkling noise. I felt no response from my fingers, so I stoped mid motion, looking down at my hands, closer and clearer inspection revealed that it wasn't a blanket on my arms, those were my arms. I flexed my wrists to be certain. My arms- or forelimbs, I wasn't sure what they were at the moment- were responding to any signal I gave them that didn't go beyond the palm, and that particular muscle group also felt odd.

I shifted a bit more, worry possessing my features. That's when I noticed the position I was sleeping in. No way in hell a human could ever find this comfortable! I started, nearly toppling out of the bed when I tried to stand. I looked back over my shoulder, to my horror, I found that not just my arms had changed, my entire body was different

I began hyperventilating, clapping my once-hands to my face, only to feel pain at the action from my now-muzzle. I felt tears welling up in my eyes as I scrambled to hide myself amongst the covers. I took long calming breaths. Okay peter, okay, calm down, think about this rationally, evidence points to you no longer being human, that's bad. But! But, you're in a bed, not your bed, but a bed. Maybe people know what happened to me? It was now that I remembered the events of last night, and how there were a bunch of horse-things.

Some of those had horns, so those were unicorns right? But two of them were flying, what were those called again? Pogo...pegi... pega-sus? Pegasus! That sounds right. I managed to calm myself down in remembering some Greek mythos.

Now with a clearer head, I shook off the covers and tried to stand up again, the human way. Failing miserably I attempted to steady myself on all four of my limbs, with spades more success. I still wobbled a little, but with a bit of practice I could get used to walking like this in no time. I looked down at my forelimbs, my eyes drawn to the splashes of color on them, while my body appeared to be covered in Thistle purple fur, my left hand-foot-thing looked like it had been dipped in sky blue dye, and my right a cream orange. Curious if the pattern continued, I stuck my head between my forelegs to look at my back feet-things. The left one looked like I stepped in red paint, and the right was a purple hue.

I lifted my head, and caught a facefull of my new hair. Intially I mistook it for silver, but in truth it was an Alice Blue – Did I mention I'm an art student? – and Way longer than it was before. I raised a hand thing to brush it out of my eyes shakily, still getting used to quadrupedal balance.

I noticed that, at the end of my clinical quarters there was a mirror, so I carefully disembarked from my cushy platform and made my way over to it. Examining myself from third person made for little comfort. I found that my slate blue eyes had survived, mostly, the silvery highlights they once boasted had been replaced, from left to right, by blue and purple ones.

Emblazoned on my chest were pink and purple splashes in similar style to my legs. When I noticed that I was a bit more equine looking than I last remembered, I looked down to my hand-things. Guess that makes these hooves? I sat down on my haunches, mildly bothered by how comfortable it was. On top of my equine discovery I noticed that my hair – mane? – and new tail had streaks of faded colors in them aswell, the same as my body; 2 slightly different shades of purple, and blue for the tail, pink, orange, and red in the mane, but all of them were very faded. I look like a tye-dye shirt..., I noted bitterly. Emblazoned on my, pretty sure it's called a flank? We're six grey circles. The hell are these? I asked my head, pawing at them. They remained unchanged.

I sighed, having confirmed my senses of sight and touch still worked, I decided to do a full inventory. I took in a deep breath of air through my nose, and was nearly knocked to the ground by the intense smells that were apparently all around me, and I'm not sure what's more confusing, that I hadn't noticed them before or that my brain could pick out each one.

The flowers next to my bed in particular. They smelled quite appetizing, which worried me further. Moving on, I cleared my throat, and tried a simple, "Testi- wow." I cut off, surprised by the pitch of my voice. "Ehh, I sound wierd. Okay hearing might be a wash then, or my voice changed." Wouldn't surprise me at this point. I went back to mentally speaking with myself, because the off-putting voice that was apparently mine sounded a little too... girly.

Taste was a simple test, from smell I could all ready tell my diet had likely changed. Thanks to the flowers I had a viable subject. I pulled off a single petal, and before I could question how I had done that without fingers I put it on my tongue and chewed. I was expecting to find that the plant was disgusting, like any yahoo who took a bite out of a flower would find out. I was not expecting to be so overwhelmed by pleasant flavours.

Mind you it wasn't amazing, more like a potato chip than say, a steak dinner, but if you're expecting dirt and you get cheese crackers the flavour would be amazing too.

I sat back down infont of the mirror. Pulling my lips back revealed that I had indeed lost my canines, what I was left with was an herbivore's box shape of teeth. This, coupled with the taste test earlier, told me that I was definitely no longer omnivorous. My ears drooped at that, when I saw it in the mirror, put me off and made them droop further. Before I could get caught in that loop I turned away and practiced walking. I was not about to have tw-four left fe-hooves if I needed to make a break for it.

A few laps around the room later, a click sounded from the door. I froze and whipped around to face it. Poking it's head in the door was a white-furred pink-maned horse-thing. Their large eyes beheld me in confusion for a moment before they gasped and entered the room, "Oh young one you're awake!" She, if the voice was anything to go off of, exclaimed.

Judging by the size difference she has the right to call me such, I thought before replying awkwardly. "I, uhh, yeah?"

She nodded before gesruring to the bed. "While its good to see you up and full of energy, you've been out like a light for a week, don't push yourself." A smile parted her lips, and seemed oddly natural to see human facial expressions on a horse-thing. "Up you go missy, doctors orders."

I've been unconscious for a week!? That's so weird, it feels like only yesterday I... I, exploded? That sounds crazy... wait, what did she call me? I turned to look at her just as I reached the foot of the bed. "Uuum, what did you call me?" I repeated out loud.

The horse, I think female horses are called mares, gave me a puzzled look. "I'm sorry?"

I thought on how the medical professional could have possibly gotten my gender wrong, but thought better of correcting her. After all the other changes that I had gone through, supported by my high voice... I decided to shelve that thought for a future mental breakdown. "Nevermind," I said, jumping back up onto the bed again.

After I settled back down I decided to pry a bit of information out of her. "So, uh, miss?"

"Oh, my name is Nurse Redheart."

"Nurse Redheart, how did I get here?" Of all the possible questions this was atop the list. Find out how I got here, find a way back home.

Nurse Redheart's smile dropped only the slightest bit. "That's a bit of a difficult question, young one." She began, leaving me a bit miffed that I was being treated like a child. "Could you possibly tell me your parents' names, so I could get them over here and tell them?" She asked.

I let my posture slump a bit. How to approach this question? I was almost certain I had no parents in this world, and I was certain this was another world, what with the whole shadow claw thing and talking horses and what not.

I decided to just go with the truth. "My parents passed away a few years ago. But I can take care of myself. Now please, nurse, how did I get here?" As I half expected the mare gasped upon hearing my parents were dead. But instead of receiving information, I was pulled into a bone crushing hug.

"Oh you poor thing! To have to have gone through that at such a young age!" The nurse wept openly.

"But I said I was okay? I'm a..." How to word this? If I use the wrong term and it ends up being slang or derogatory I'll either get slapped or hugged tighter. "Big, pony..." I said carfully, seeing no bad reaction I continued. "And I can take care of myself." I stated calmly.
"It's okay little one you don't have to be brave for me, you can just let it out." The nurse said patting my back with her hoof, apparently having ignored everything I just said.

"But I-" I caught sight of myself in the mirror, tears were streaming from my eyes, and my breath was starting to hitch. "But I'm, okay with it." I said. It was almost a question, and more to myself than her.

"Honey you've been crying since I brought up your parents, I'm sorry, but it's okay." She reassured me.

Well then, that doesnt make any sense. I was never the kind who spilled tears so easily, especially when it's an old wound that had basically healed over. And yet here I was, exercising the ol' water works. Sure I missed my parents, they were my parents for crying out loud, but I moved on allready, so why was I...

I felt something shift in my chest, and somehow the tears streaming down my cheeks increased, I don't recall much of what happened after that but I know I woke up about an hour later if the sun was anything to go off of.



I opened my puffy eyes, rubbing them with my fi- oh, still hooves. Nurse Redheart had left sometime after I cried myself to sleep. Huh, I never thought that was an actual thing, I thought idly. The flower I had taken a petal off of was now in a plate in front of me. There was a note attached.
I opened it up to reveal nothing but unintelligible squiggles. I chalked that up to the whole doctors hand writing stereotype. I looked from the note, to the flower on the plate. Am I supposed to eat this?
As if in response my stomach let out a sound that was nigh cartoonish in volume.

I folded the note back up, logic was split on how to continue. My human experience told me. You don't eat flowers, are you crazy? But my experience from before told me. Well she did give us permission, we are hungry, and it does smell really good.

Mulling it over for a minute, I acquiesced, taking a bite out of the flower. If the petals were potato chips, then the flower itself was akin to a burger in terms of flavor strength and how much my horse taste buds liked it. It was very, very different from meat, but also really good.

After I swallowed the first bite, I stared down at the rest of the flower hungrily. One second later the rest of the flower was in my mouth. Upon finishing my snack I got up and stretched. My ar-forelegs screamed protest at the way I was attempting to do it, as I likely could break a bone or dislocate my shoulder doing it the human way. So I then tried stretching like a cat, that seemed effective.

Morning routine semi-complete, I set about confirming my fears. Jumping from the bed to the mirror, I made it about half way there in the leap, and nearly fell on my face. Note to self, avoid shortcuts till you have re-learned how to walk. Once before the mirror I turned around and shifted my tail out of the way. "W-well, I suppose th-that I know for sure at least..." I said, girly voice shaking. I was on the verge of tears again, so I decided to slap my cheek to pull my head out of-OW! Oh, right hooves, I just punched myself, wonderfull.

For some reason focusing on my hooves or the other changes my body went through seemed to take my attention away from the change between my legs. So I started pacing again. This would have gone on till I was tired, but I heard approaching fo-hoof steps and voices. I shot right back up onto the bed and went about looking asleep. "So she finally woke up? Thank goodness I was starting to worry she might not due to side effects of that crystal." An unkown, but strangely familiar, voice said.

"Actually Miss Sparkle, the crystal has all but broken down and fallen off, whatever was causing its growth before must have stopped. I heard a muffled Nurse Redheart say, definitely closer.

Curious I rubbed a hoof over my forehead, and was rewarded with a small pile of light blue flakes. "Is this what there talking about?" I whispered to myself. Before resuming my false-sleep, as I heard Redheart just outside the door.

"Just one second I'll see if she is awake, then you can ask her some questions, but don't bring up her-the topic we discussed," she said turning the door handle.
"I won't, promise, the poor dear." I heard Miss Sparkle say in a somber tone.

Nurse Redheart popped her head in the door, looking about the room. Eventually her eyes came to rest on me, I swear I could feel them looking at me despite my eyes being closed. The longer she looked at me, the more it made my right hoof itch, why that particular one I have no idea, but none the less it was annoying.

"Are you awake little one?" Feigning sleep was something I was good at, so was acting groggy, I exercised both. Rubbing my left eye with my wrist I opened it sleepily. "Sorry to wake you."
Deception successful, now if I could get my ha-hoof to stop itching that'd be great
"But one of the mares that brought you to us is here to see you." That snapped my attention to her fully.
Does she mean here as in the hospital, or here as in magical pony land? She opened the door fully, letting in a purple furred mare with a dark blue mane, with streaks of purple and raspberry in it.

"Hello, my name is Twilight Sparkle." She said.
What's up with the names here? I looked to her flank, on it was a six pointed star with many white star shapes surrounding it. "...Hi" I said once I realized she was waiting for me to respond.

"Do you mind if I come in?" I shook my head.
I was staring hard at her face. Why does she look so familiar? I wondered. She smiled and made her way over to the bed, sitting down just beside it.

"Do you know where you are?" Miss Sparkle asked.

"I... A hospital?" I fumbled over the words. Curse my girly voice, ruining my social skills!
The mare smiled patiently. "That's right. Do you remember what happened?"

I just couldn't place her, she sounded familiar, looked familiar, but I swear I've never seen her in my-"You were at the castle." the words came spilling out of my mouth as realization dawned on me.

The mare looked genuinely supprised. "You saw me? Where were you in the castle? Did Ni-"

I cut her off, words still spilling from my mouth. "I was infront of the dark mare, then it was bright with colors. Then, when it went dark again, I exploded." I said in an even tone. Which surprised me, cause that sounds insane, like loony bin levels of crazy, and I had meant to keep that to myself.

Twilight gasped and raised a hoof at me. "You were in the middle of!" She looked at me with a very worried expression, which made my hoof itch worse, actually both my front hooves were itchy now, so I clapped them together and began rubbing them back and forth in an effort to dispel the irritation.
"It's alright, I'm fine. Everypony has a little explosion now and then~!" I said with a giggle, trying to make light of the situation. Wait Why did I say pony? Why did I giggle? And why does my mouth taste wierd?

To my itching hooves' displeasure her horror only seemed to deepen at my statement. "What!?" I felt a pressure building up in my forehead as well, today my new body just wasn't going to be nice to me I suppose.

"What what? I can't answer a question I don't understand, silly~" I laughed again, why was this so funny to me?

"Whats the matter miss Sparkle?" Redheart asked, in a worried tone.

Aw, not you too, now I've got two ponies I have to cheer up! I thought with a mental 'tsk tsk'.

"Are you okay?" Twilight half yelled at me, causing my ears to flinch back instinctivly,

"I'm okay, but could you be, a little... bleh." I turned my head to the side and stuck out my tongue. That wierd taste wouldn't go away, and I couldn't quite place it. "Sorry, I'm okay, just a wierd taste. Never eaten a flower before." I mused out loud, guessing at the flavour's origin. My statement seemed to calm them down and lessen the itch in my hooves.

"Never?" The two mares asked at the same time.
"Nope." I replied simply, "It's considered rude to the gardeners to destroy the decorations." Which was true I suppose. They seemed to accept this. "Was that all the questions?" I asked when they shared a look.

Twilight looked back at me. "Wha-no, it wasn't, could you tell me your name?" She asked, now that we were off that odd tangent.
Something dawned on me. Well crap, the name Peter, if I really am a girl, sounds really wierd. I tried to give the alias Patricia, but the thought made my hoof itch. So I started running through the list of girls names I knew till I found one that didn't bother my ha-hoof. After a moment's pause one name stood out to me, and it was by far the oddest choice, it didn't fit at all in the list, as I had never heard it before, but it seemed so... right.

"A-Argent."

Twilight had turned away from me and was asking Nurse Redheart if I had any signs of amnesia, she looked back at me now. "My name is Argent Accord." I stated, and I must say that was the best lie I ever told, because even I believed that was my name, for a second.

"Argent... it's very nice to meet you Argent." Twilight said, extending a hoof to me. I stretched out my own and pressed it to hers, after the brief contact she dropped her hoof back to the floor, I mirrored her. Nurse Redheart was scribbling something onto a chart, most likely the alias I gave them. "Well, that will be all for now. I'll be back later. Me and the girls are going out to lunch."

It's lunchtime already? I was bewildered, there no way I had spent that much time talking with her.
She stood up and smiled. "I'll be back later with a few of them, they'd like to say hello." I nodded and curled my tail around myself, that felt wierd and comfortable.

Apparently I was tired. I yawned, heard more twinkling, and said. "That'd be okay I suppose." They were looking at me funny again.

I cocked my head to one side. "What? Something in my teeth?" I asked.

Twilight shook her head and muttered. "Nothing, nothing, bye." And left with nurse Redheart.
I got another flower out of the vase, now that they were gone I was free to try and wash the taste of friendship out of my mouth. I paused mid bite. What did I just say that taste was?

Author's Note:

Well here we are again. The end of the chapter.
I feel I've made fairly obvious what one of little Argent's traits are. But anyway, plans have been set in motion, and hopefully a few laughs will be had.
These chapters kinda just run off on tangents from what I had originally planned, but I think it still reads fine.
Once again please point out any mistakes I made and enjoy.

Special thanks to my editors. Jasperr Hart and gerandakis. With their help, soon enough all of these older chapters will read a lot smoother.