• Member Since 10th Sep, 2014
  • offline last seen 10 hours ago

BubblePuff


I am a brony and a long time writer. This site will be for my MLP fanfiction, and you can read my other works on Deviantart.com under the name potsticker13.

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Source

Through a dark plan gone wrong, Spike ends up being turned into a baby. Now it is up to Twilight to raise the little dragon. Can the princess of friendship handle motherhood?

Art by DragonChaser123

Chapters (6)
Comments ( 39 )

CUUUUUUTE ! :rainbowkiss:
I can't stop imaginate what would happen if Dash would've have open the package instead of Spike

Tirek and Chrysalis both stepped aside, leaving Cozy Glow to answer Grogar. “Well, um, you see there’s and old expression ‘Like taking candy from a foal.’ With the element wielders turned into foals, we could have easily marched right into Canterlot and taken over.” Cozy Glow then gulped and forced a smile.

That plan isn’t that bad really.

Cute, but kind of rushed. :eeyup:

So, how long until Twilight has to start changing diapers again? :trixieshiftright:

Nice start. I like how it gives us a taste of the trio trying to 'work together' to create a way to succeed in defeating their enemies. Plus, if I gather more into the thinking, they'd likely get Grogar with it once they were ready to take over all that he has been striving to do. It'd be such a slap in the face for Grogar to be stuck with all those he had hoped would be beaten by his "Legion Of Doom" where he instead ends up regressed and powerless alongside them.

I could see Chrysalis delighting in the 'love' the babies would provide. Plus, for insurance, Tirek would take all their magic away and get a certain power boost.

Cozy would... uh... Be a cruel babysitter?

A bit rushed but I see some potential here.
I wasn't that disappointed with your Son of Sombra story so hopefully this one works out well!

9651272
*debates on whether he should bring up a certain alicorn foal*

Wanderer D
Moderator

Reading the description:
Besides the fact that Twilight already took care of him when he was a baby, you mean? As in, this might be unexpected but not something she hasn't handled before?
Seeing the crew and groups:
I was intrigued up to this point, but I'll bow out of it.

Great start on the first chapter!

A cute idea... a little rushed with the reveal of the origins of the boxes... but otherwise, it's a cute story so far... continue please

This story has a lot of potential; but is very rushed. Slow it down a bit to better describe everything that happens.
It also feels focused on describing actions. Very little is dedicated to describing the emotions of the characters.
Overall a good start though.

Cute, but still very rushed.

Any chance of Flurry Heart coming over for a visit?

9673309
I'd actually say this chapter is less rushed, and simply a little short. I felt it flowed as a much smother pace.

Since I don't think this has been answered. How old is Spike in this?
Chapter 1 it seemed like he could barely talk. Which would put him at under or close to 1 year old.
But this chapter has him old eating semi-solids, crawling, and forming small sentences. Which would place him closer to 2.

9673436 We don't know how fast baby dragons develop relative to baby ponies. What may seem advanced for ponies may be natural for dragons.

The part where they escaped the playpen reminds me of Rugrats.

9673696
i bet that's where they got it from

As always, I love the fluff.

Nice to see the story moving along. This was a really good slice of life portion to establish how things could go as the cure for what has befallen Spike is found.

I liked the 3:00 until 9:00 read-a-thon. That was very easy to visualize as twilight found out and went all Twilinanas. It also was a good time to see how Twilight and Starlight differ in personality. Both are talented magic users but each has their distinctive flaws. Twilight is ever-striving for everything to be right and Starlight struggles to keep her emotions in check. Both tend to crumble if peace is not within their reach for their respective needs.

As for needs, I'm glad Spike still got his Rarity plushie. I wonder how long Twilight has known he's had that but hasn't said anything?

<LoL!> That ending for this chapter was perfect! Very easy to see as one of those 'before commercial' or 'episode end' moments.

It's interesting to see how Flurry Heart acted up as much as she did. However, being the only child between Shining, Cadence, and twilight, I'm sure spoiling is off-the-charts. Not to forget how Crystal Ponies must take lots of opportunities to come and see the future Princess who is also one of only five Alicorns currently known.

Thanks also for bringing our bad guys back in. It was a short blurb but, like the show itself, it keeps us mindful other things are going on outside of this chaos that is going on.

Flurry Heart definitely deserved that. Hopefully, Spike witnessing it will make him realize that similar punishments await if he disobeys Twilight.

At that moment Starlight Glimmer came back from the school of friendship. “Hey guys! How was the play-” She stopped when she saw the destruction that Flurry Heart had caused. “Wow. That must have been some playdate.”

:rainbowlaugh: Some playdate indeed.

I am now convinced we are running off of Rugrat's logic. Where the babies can communicate with each other just fine but all the adult hear is baby noises. Works for me.

9693208 Can't go wrong with Rugrats logic.

Woop! This chapter was definitely long in the making as you took all you've built up from the first chapter and really created quite an encounter. Chrysalis snatching the pearl, Cozy grabbing Spike, and Tirek providing the defensive / offensive line definitely shows them doing what was asked of them by Grogar.

If Grogar hasn't yet sensed his bell, I'm sure his viewing of the trios success and presentation of the pearl will definitely keep him looking for treachery a tad lower on the radar. What he'll do with it is anyone's guess, too.

Now I can see some jokes of how such a relic is wasted on a Changeling along with a desire for Tirek to say something like, "Change that pesky pony into something less annoying!".

Keep up the awesome work. :)

aren't all the charms that the hippogryph where made from pieces of the pearl there for wouldn't they need to gather all the charms together to rebuild the pearl?

Well, shit. Somepony's definitely not gonna be happy about this. :twilightangry2:

Whoa... Now this certainly was a most epic moment in the story. It reads, to me, like it could easily be an alternative ending for Season 9. Grogar gets his super-power, Twilight logics that she and her friends will be the target, and we get what we got here.

One thing Twilight could never factor is Grogar. Perhaps, if she did, she'd have done something different with Spike and Starlight? By default, Chrysalis would come after Starlight and Tirek would want to get back at Twilight. However they are organized and, well, even more powerful now that Tirek is loaded-up with Starlight's Twilight-like, if not greater, magical power.

What will happen next will be most interesting indeed.

Celestia turned to Luna. “We can worry about that later. For now we must warn the royal guards to ready the defensives. Now that those three are working together who knows when they might strike.”

defenses.

Grogar, you're about to learn the hard way why you DON'T hurt a mare's young one! :twilightangry2:

it a good ending it just feels a little rushed

Very nice! This turned out to be a wonderful potential ending for Season 9. I like the idea of Grogar having one magical artifact for power while Cozy, Tirek, and Chrysalis had another. Like true bad guys they ended up turning on each other. This is what opened the door for Twilight and her friends to save the day.

This part seemed a little rushed. However I think it made it feel more like a genuine episode for doing so. There isn't always time to describe every single nuance to a given moment, episode, etc. The way you wrote this gave a true, to me, show-like feel.

I do hope Cozy Glow doesn't end up in Tartarus. I think she just needs some very special help to not be bad. Perhaps Foal Juvenile Hall and a Counselor? Perhaps some time in a Equestrian Psychiatric Ward?

I applaud you and this story. Very delightful and truly a fun read. :)

That's it, huh? I feel like there could've been a way to tie it all at the end, maybe Twilight thinking back on that experience with an older Spike?

MJP

.....Do do do do do do baby spike do m do do do do baby spike do do do do do baby spike

10008576
I hate myself for finding that funny:rainbowlaugh:

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