Apple Bloom is proud to join her grandfather on a trip to the Vanhoover Food Court: the biggest annual gathering of every pony who's anypony in the food business.
While doing her rounds as a proud representative of the Apple family, she finds a Unicorn colt with a unique cutie mark problem: he wants to be a farmer, but he doesn't know how. Everything he tries seems to be missing something.
Luckily for him, Apple Bloom is perfectly qualified to show him how to find the true meaning of his talent and figure out what he needs to do to be happy with his work.
And absolutely nothing will go wrong.
Chapters (4)
You should tell real life to get out of the way and let you write!
Looking forward to the next update!
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Heh. Thanks, and don't worry. I always publish with enough backlog to keep updates at least consistent. Chapter 2 is as good as ready, it's the other two that still need tweaking.
As for telling real life to get out of the way... I'd get in trouble with the government if I did that, let me put it like that
It's job stuff, mostly. Distracting job stuff.
I'm surprised Flim & Flam aren't in the Health Food Section.
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They had their representative in the first pavillion during Chapter 1, along with the rest of the scammers
Can't imagine why they'd be excluded from the more prestigious halls, though...
Based on your Author's Note at the end of Chapter One, I reckon you made a good decision changing the story to the way it is now.
The first chapter is great.
It opens up the story well.
I like this Apple Bloom you have created.
Liked the bit with the Yaks, that was nice and very in character for them. The idea that while yaks smash, smashing isn't random or wild, but exact and controlled, is a good one. I bet there might be a minor language issue where they have lots of different words for degrees and types of smashing (you know, the old 50 different words for snow myth), but as there is only one word for it in ponish, it all ends up sounding the same.
I think Apple Bloom's growing realization of what the truth of String Bean situation is was handled really well. I was worried that the fact the he was obviously Poppyhock kid would be played as a big reveal, but having her quickly put it together relieved that. It's going to be interesting to see what solution she comes up with.
Scootalloo wears socks?
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When cheerleading, sure. Gotta make absolutely certain the outfits don't spontaneously explode in the middle of the routine, after all...
It's at the end that things need to explode, for a big finale.
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The yaks were fun to write, glad it worked. With regards to Poppyhock, there's always a fine balance of managing expectations like that, and subverting them where appropriate. String Bean's family situation is one such example.
Oh, and on a more random note: yes, Mister Sock will be in the last chapter, and he will be pointy-eared and logical. I'm already this far down with the Star Trek references, might as well.
Having her make the jump to thinking like Diamond Tiara was a great idea. Not only does it provide an unexpected answer to her problems, it also shows she gotten to know Diamond better, to see her past the scheming bully she used to be.
On the whole, this was a really enjoyable story. Good character pieces, and world building. Apple Bloom had a strong character arc, and the ending is hopeful. Good job all around.
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It was fun to write, especially some of the outright comedy bits.
Glad you enjoyed it
Wait a minute. That can't be it? What about him coming to Ponyville and selling his stuff? Does it work out for him? Come on it can't be over.
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. Okay, if I get a good idea and some time for it, maybe I'll add an extra chapter or do a sequel. But you have to understand, I aim for episode style, and episodes often end just with setting something up. I'll need to think up a good scenario first if I'm going to expand on this.
Aww, geez, not again
Maybe a crossover with the pair from Stub and Snub, toss Starlight Glimmer in there and/or Discord to make more Star Trek references with Grand Pear. Has anyone done that yet? I feel like someone should have done that by now
Anyway, glad you enjoyed! Going to be taking a small break from pony fic for a while, see blogs for more info.
it took me a bit but i saw the star trek refence. good story
That was a good story.
I really like how smart Apple Bloom is. Like, not just intellectually but also emotionally. So many stories have the characters act stupid to further the plot, but this one has everyone behave intelligently.