Easy As Pie
Easy as pie.
It was a silly saying and Tempest Shadow knew it. It was something that her mother used to say. The phrase was one of very few things that Tempest had left from her fillyhood, and it annoyed the Storm King by being too "cute." Maybe that was why she kept saying it.
Regardless, it was appropriate. Canterlot had fallen in mere minutes. These pathetic little ponies, who were only interested in parties and making friends, had been completely blindsided by the Storm King's invasion force. They had no patrols, no early warning systems, no defenses set up to protect such an irresistible target as the Friendship Festival. They hadn't even known that Tempest's skiff was there until moments before she made her grand entrance. The ponies were practically begging for someone to attack them, then they had the gall to be surprised when someone did.
Perhaps most unbelievable of all, the four princesses had come out to confront her personally. All four of them! Without any protection at all! Putting the kingdom's entire command structure in harm's way was the greatest tactical blunder they could possibly have made. There was a reason the Storm King was three days behind her, traveling with the bulk of the army while Tempest led the advance force. He wouldn't arrive on the scene until he was sure that Tempest had things well in hoof, and that he would be safe in his new stronghold.
Tempest shook her head. Easy as pie, indeed; the alicorns might as well have served themselves up on a plate for her.
It looked like those three days wouldn't even be needed. There were still pockets of resistance, but nothing significant: Here a half-dozen royal guards stood in formation to fend off a group of storm creatures, there two unicorn mages used magic and trickery to confuse and run from their attackers. The stump of Tempest's broken horn itched as she watched them, but she shoved thoughts of the old injury to the back of her mind, as she did almost every day. Soon she wouldn't have to do that anymore.
Tempest Shadow's ice-green eyes swept the battlefield—though it hardly deserved the name—one more time. Satisfied that things were proceeding even better than planned, and that she was no longer needed here, she returned to her ship to report to the Storm King.
Starlight Glimmer blasted another of the creatures out of her path. Their magic-reflecting shields had caught her by surprise the first time, but luckily the shields were small and it was easy enough to steer her spells around them. Small compared to the monsters holding them, anyway—each shield was still larger than a full-grown pony. Thankfully, it didn't seem like their armor carried the same magic-repelling properties.
"Where did these things come from?" Starlight asked as she galloped through the city streets.
"How should I know?" her companion shouted back, so rattled that she forgot to refer to herself in the third person.
"It was rhetorical." Starlight reached out with her magic and telekinetically threw two more of the things aside, getting herself and Trixie a few feet closer to the gates of Canterlot and, hopefully, escape. She gasped as at least five more dropped from the sky and blocked them in. Starlight grabbed her friend in her magic field and teleported the two of them behind the monsters. They kept running, but it seemed like there were always more.
"I could use some backup here, Trix!" Starlight panted.
"Backup?!" Trixie asked incredulously. She was a showmare, she didn't know any combat spells!
Well, actually, there was that one...
Trixie stumbled to a stop as yet another of the huge creatures blocked their path. This one carried a large staff, and despite her love of magical props, she didn't think she wanted to see what it did.
"Very well," Trixie said to the creature. "Just this once, The Great and Powerful Trixie will grace you with a free show. Watch, and be amazed!"
Trixie powered up her horn and a dark, ominous cloud appeared over the thing's head. A bolt of lightning lashed down from the cloud, striking cleanly with as much power as Trixie could muster.
The thing shook its head and gave an annoyed grunt. It lowered the staff to point at Trixie, who squealed and threw herself to the ground.
"Ugh." Starlight tossed the monster aside like an empty cup and the two ponies started galloping again. "Their helmets have openings for their eyes," she advised Trixie. "Use a flare."
"Um. Right." She gave a sheepish grin.
They had a surprisingly clear run for a while. Perhaps the attackers had decided that these two little unicorns were more trouble than they were worth. Or, and Starlight had to admit that this was more likely, they had simply moved farther into the city while she and Trixie had been going the other way.
"We're almost there!" Trixie shouted.
Canterlot's main gate rose up ahead of them, a sight almost as welcome as the colorful knot of ponies clustered in front of it. Starlight heaved a sigh of relief that her friends were apparently unharmed—or she would have sighed if she hadn't been too busy gasping for air, exhausted from her running fight against the invaders.
As the two unicorns drew closer, Starlight saw why her friends hadn't already fled the city. Two of the things guarded the bridge leading out, massive creatures with enormous magic-reflecting shields. There were only two, though. Just two more and they were home free.
"You take the one on the right," Starlight called back to Trixie.
"Got it."
Applejack's ears perked up at the sound of galloping hooves. She risked glancing away from the looming monsters to see where the noise was coming from, and her eyes widened as she saw two unicorns charging straight toward her, horns aglow.
"Hit the deck!" she shouted, and threw herself down to the ground. The others obeyed without question except for Rainbow Dash, who launched into the air instead.
A bolt of teal magic streaked overhead. One of the creatures held up its shield, but the spell made a 90-degree turn in midair and went straight over it, then turned again, taking the thing full in the face. It dropped bonelessly to the ground, unconscious or perhaps worse.
A second later, a series of three blindingly bright orbs shot past. One went wide, but two flew straight into the opening of the other thing's helmet and burst. The creature roared and dropped its shield to claw feebly at the helmet. It staggered backward, blinded and maddened by the pain, and stepped right off the bridge.
"Hi guys!" Starlight gasped as she galloped past them. "Time to go!"
Trixie was a few steps behind her. Once Applejack and the others picked their jaws up off the ground, they followed.
Starlight and Trixie led them across the bridge, Trixie only stopping briefly to glance over the edge where the one had fallen.
"Yeesh." Whatever Trixie saw down there made her grimace and turn faintly green.
"C'mon," Rainbow Dash shouted at the showpony, "before more of those things show up!" She rocketed forward to make sure there were no nasty surprises waiting on the other side of the gate, and Trixie followed behind her.
Thankfully, either the invading force was too small to chase after escapees, or they just didn't care. Though the airships still loomed ominously in the sky, no more of the things came down to pursue them once they had left Canterlot proper. The group got a short distance away from the city and took cover in a stand of trees.
Starlight Glimmer immediately fell to the ground, her sides heaving and her coat lathered in sweat. Trixie wasn't in much better shape. The others were panting for breath, but they hadn't had as long of a run out of the city and they hadn't had to fight along the way, so they weren't in nearly as rough of shape as she and Trixie were.
Despite her exhaustion, Starlight forced her eyes open and took stock of the situation. Applejack and Rainbow Dash had taken up positions around the group, keeping an eye out for any more of the monsters they'd escaped from. Fluttershy was nervously hovering around the two collapsed mares to see if she could help them. Her front hooves were covering her mouth, and she was whispering a barely-audible mantra of ohmygoodnessohmygoodnessohmygoodness. Pinkie Pie simply looked lost, like she couldn't quite make sense of what was happening. Spike clung quietly to Rarity's back, unusually glum for being so close to the object of his young affections. And Twilight... where was Twilight?
Oh no.
Starlight could barely muster a whisper, so she directed her question to the only pony close enough to hear. "Where's... Twilight?" she panted.
Fluttershy gasped. Her eyes filled with tears and she looked away, then slowly shook her head.
Starlight's heart plummeted and her stomach sank into the ground. Though she had a horrible, gnawing feeling that she didn't want to hear the answer, she needed to know. She took a deeper breath.
"Where's Twilight?" she asked aloud.
A sudden hush fell over the group, with the friends looking uncomfortably at each other, and at Spike, who was still curled up miserably on Rarity's back.
"Please," Starlight gasped, her voice tinged with desperation, "tell me what happened to her."
Applejack turned toward her with eyes downcast. "They took 'er."
Spike wailed when Applejack said that, but Starlight's heart soared to hear the word took, and not killed. Then her throat tightened up again as she wondered what they were doing to Twilight right now. She placed one forehoof on the ground and began to push herself up.
"What are we... doing out here then?" Starlight asked, still unable to catch her breath. "We gotta..." her exhausted legs collapsed again, unable to even bear her weight now that the adrenaline rush was fading. "We gotta help her."
"Hold yer horses Starlight, it ain't that simple." Applejack sounded sympathetic, and she even put a hoof on Starlight's shoulder, but when Starlight tried again to move she found that the earth pony was holding her gently but firmly in place.
"What do you mean?" Starlight was too tired to even fight back. "They have our friend, and we need to get her back. How complicated is that?"
Rainbow Dash dropped down beside them. "It's not just Twilight," she said grimly. "They got all four of them."
"All four of—" Starlight started to ask, and then her eyes widened as it clicked. "All four of the princesses?"
"What?" Trixie gasped from the ground next to Starlight. "How?!"
"Seriously," Starlight agreed. There had been too many of the creatures to handle on her own, but they were slow, clumsy brutes. She'd been tearing through them easily enough, and she was just one unicorn. "How did four alicorns lose to those things?"
"It wasn't just those monsters," Rainbow Dash said, "there was this crazy-tough unicorn with them. I mean, I think she was a unicorn, but her horn was broken off. What do you call a unicorn with no horn?" she wondered.
"A unicorn!" Rarity snapped.
A broken horn? Starlight flinched involuntarily from the image. That was a horrific injury, one that would cause any unicorn to shudder in sympathy, but it wasn't the important part right now. Even with a working horn, one unicorn beating four alicorns should have been all but impossible. Starlight herself was just about an even match for Twilight one on one—a bit more than a match if she were being honest, but not by all that much—and she was one of the most skilled magicians in Equestria.
"Okay," Starlight said, "in that case, how did four alicorns lose to a single unicorn?"
"She had these smoke bomb things," Rainbow Dash explained. "I don't know what they were, but they punched through the princesses' magic like it was nothing. They were full of this green gas that turned Twilight and the others to stone, and then those monsters carried them away!"
Spike let out another heartbroken cry, prompting Rarity to nuzzle him and murmur reassuringly. On any other day that would have been enough to reduce the young dragon to a puddle of lovesick purple mush, but right now he hardly seemed to notice.
Starlight thought she might cry herself, or maybe be sick right here on the forest floor. Not only Twilight, but Cadance, Luna, and even Celestia, turned to stone by unknown magic and captured by unknown invaders. It was not an exaggeration to say that Equestria itself was in danger. Still, that seemed somehow insignificant next to the fact that her friend and mentor was in trouble, while Starlight was resting in the woods like she was on a camping trip! She had apparently recovered just enough of her breath to choke out a sob.
"Hey." A powder-blue hoof clapped her on the shoulder. It was at an awkward angle since both ponies were lying on the ground, but appreciated nonetheless. "Twilight will be fine."
Starlight turned over to look at Trixie, slightly surprised to hear those words of comfort coming from her. Trixie was one of her first and best friends but, well, she wasn't always the most thoughtful pony in Equestria.
"After all," Trixie continued, "any pony who could defeat The Great and Powerful Trixie—though only on a technicality, mind you, and she did cheat—could never be harmed by those invaders!"
There it was.
"Well," Applejack interrupted, "doesn't look like anyone followed us. We'd best get a move on. We'll have ta hoof it to the nearest town and catch a ride to Ponyville from there. You two okay to keep going?" she asked Starlight and Trixie.
Starlight groaned, but forced her hooves underneath her and stood. Her legs ached terribly and felt about ten times heavier than they should, but at least they supported her now. Trixie made a similar effort, only to swoon dramatically and fall back to the ground, demanding that they let her rest a bit longer.
"Look," Rainbow Dash said to her, "you can suck it up and come with us, or you can wait for those monsters to come find you. Your call."
"Rainbow Dash!" Fluttershy scolded her friend, then flew to Trixie's side and offered a hoof. "Come on," she said gently. "You must be exhausted, but we can take it slowly."
Rainbow Dash rolled her eyes. "Trixie's fine," she protested. "She travels all over Equestria, on hoof, dragging a wagon around. A little running won't kill her."
While Fluttershy offered the help that Rainbow Dash insisted wasn't needed, Applejack turned to the last member of their party, the uncharacteristically silent Pinkie Pie.
"Hey," she said quietly to the other earth pony, "how ya holdin' up?"
Pinkie slowly turned her head to reveal downcast, watery blue eyes. She stared intently at a leaf a few inches in front of Applejack's front right hoof.
"It was supposed to be a party," Pinkie mumbled with a sniffle. She messily wiped her eyes and nose on a foreleg. "It was supposed to be the biggest, bestest party ever. Twilight and I thought we had it all figured out, but even I didn't think to plan for giant monsters and... and stone friends!"
"We'll get her back, Pinkie," Applejack swore. "You know we ain't giving up on Twilight, or any o' the others fer that matter. I promise."
"Do you..." Pinkie sniffed again and managed a hopeful smile, "do you Pinkie Promise?"
Applejack nodded. "I do. I Pinkie Promise that we're gonna save Twilight and everypony else." Somehow.
"Hooray!" Pinkie perked up immediately, her tears suddenly gone as if they'd never existed. "Then what are we waiting for?"
"Trixie, mostly," Rainbow Dash grumbled, then yelped as the showmare bumped her roughly.
"Whoops, sorry," Trixie said, completely without remorse. "I must be more tired than I thought."
"Come on, Trixie," Fluttershy encouraged her, offering a shoulder to lean on, "we'll get there."
Rainbow Dash rolled her eyes, but didn't press the issue any farther.
It was an exhausted and saddened group that trekked away from Canterlot, silent except for the occasional bickering between Rainbow Dash and Trixie. Strangely enough, Starlight was almost grateful for it. Their arguing, plus her own fatigue, was keeping her from thinking too hard. Her thoughts, and the anxiety and sadness that would surely come with them, were a luxury she couldn't afford. There would be time to think later; right now, until they were all safely away from Canterlot, she just needed to do.
"Oh, for—" the Storm King's voice, slightly muffled by the magic that let them communicate over great distances, sounded very annoyed. "Stupid spell phones, I'll never get the hang of—where is she?"
The Storm King's backside was clearly visible through a cloud of blue smoke, and it was a good thing that he was facing the wrong way or he would have caught Tempest Shadow rolling her eyes. The smoke was rising from a bowl, inside of which was the potion that created this magical link. It was pretty new magical tech, but still, how hard could it be to face forward and talk?
"Over here," Tempest said.
"Over where?" The Storm King asked, looking from side to side in all the wrong directions. "Where's 'here?'"
"Here," Tempest repeated. "Behind you."
"Behind... oh, there you are." He was finally looking the right way, and he locked eyes with Tempest. "Okay. What've you got?"
Tempest Shadow chuckled darkly. "I've got Canterlot, and four little pony princesses."
"Really?"
Tempest nodded.
Wow, that was fast!" The Storm King exclaimed. He sounded genuinely surprised, perhaps even a little impressed. "That might be a new record for you." He rubbed his clawed hands together greedily. "So the whole city's mine already."
Tempest silently snorted at the word mine, but inclined her head toward her liege. "We're still sweeping up the last bits of resistance, but yes, the city is yours. And more importantly, so is the princesses' magic. Once you arrive here you'll have all the power you ever dreamed of."
"Yeah, well, I'd better," he growled back. He hefted a staff, a gnarled piece of wood set with a bright blue crystal at the top. "Because right now all I've got is an oversized toothpick!" He'd been harping on about that damned staff ever since she'd told him what it was, what it could do.
"The Staff of Sacanas will drain the alicorns' magic as I promised," Tempest reassured him for the dozenth time. "And then, I trust, you will keep your promise?" A small spark of magic zipped out from the broken remnants of her horn.
"Yeah yeah, I got it," the Storm King waved one of his massive claws dismissively. "Don't worry, you'll get your precious little spell shooter back."
Tempest Shadow supposed that jab about her horn should have annoyed her, perhaps even angered her, but it didn't. She was beyond being hurt by mere words, especially words that came from a callous idiot like the Storm King.
"Anything else?" that same callous idiot demanded.
"No," Tempest replied. "We'll finish cleaning up the defenders and have everything ready for your arrival." The corner of her mouth tightened as she held back a smile. "Easy as pie."
"Blugh! Gag me." The Storm King's long purple tongue lolled out of his mouth in disgust. He pointed sharply toward Tempest. "I'll be there in three days, and I don't want to hear a damned thing about pie when I land." He angrily waved a claw through the smoke to cut off the connection, though a faint, "I hate pie!" still came through.
Once she was sure that the Storm King was gone, Tempest allowed herself a small chuckle. It had been a glorious day, even if she'd had to spend a few minutes of it dealing with that fool. The Storm King would have his magic, and no doubt he'd have the whole world soon enough after that. He was welcome to it, as far as Tempest Shadow was concerned. All that mattered was that she would soon have what she wanted. Everything was coming together.
Easy as pie.
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This looks worth reading... Keep writing.
9628415
Thank you! That's the plan
Finally! I've been waiting for a story like this for some time! Since it's only the first chapter, and the writing is so good, I can't say much apart from great job. Once this pans out a little more, I'll have more to comment on.
The only issue I came across was a missed italic in this sentence.
"After all," Trixie continued, "any pony who could defeat The Great and Powerful Trixie—though only on a technicality, mind you, and she did[/i ]cheat—could never be harmed by those invaders!"
9629052
Whoops. You'd think I'd have noticed that a huge chunk of the chapter was in italics. Thanks for the catch!
Alondro sighs and uses magic to accelerate a small rock to several hundred mph, which he then directs from afar into Tempest's skull when her back is turned. She dies instantly.
(See, magical sniping is really effective when no one's ever thought of it before.)
This story had better not die after only one chapter!
9639657
Don't worry! Chapter 2 is already written and I'm working on 3. The plan is to update every Sunday, and I'm hoping to stay at least one chapter ahead of those deadlines.
Are you going to delve into other what-ifs? The ending sort of seems to be setting up a "Tempest Shadow takes the Staff of Sacanas from the Storm King" scenario
i'm hoping to see Sunset Shimmer and Lightning Dust join the resistance. Sunset would be of great magical help, and it would be very interesting to see how Rainbow and lightning would be as resistance allies
Now I'm wondering where exactly was Flurry Heart during the movie... or more accurately who was watching her?
I assume the Changelings where busy rebuilding after The Fall of Chrysalis
But is it an Academy Record?