Enchorus

by GMBlackjack

Super Smash Bros: Interdimensional Tussle (Ponygood)

The sun was shining over a vast expanse of grass. There wasn't much else besides it, save for the occasional twittering of a bird or the rustling of the wind between the blades. That changed quite suddenly when tears in the fabric of reality spontaneously formed, spewing forth all manner of varied creatures, congregating in two very distinct masses.

A red-hatted Italian plumber appeared out of one of the rifts and took in the crowd gathered before him. A lot of their faces were quite familiar; indeed, he had dunked that dragon-like scowl in lava quite a few times over the course of his adventures, fought that bounty hunter, and worked with the little pink black hole in the past. Even some of the newer faces were familiar in a way, but it was still strange to have a yoga instructor and supersonic hedgehog with his usual friends. But when invitations for the newest Smash tournament were spread through the local multiverse, he was not expecting... this.

Mario sighed and put a gloved hand to his face. "Which-a one of us thought it was a good idea to invite the spawn of-a Sony to our gathering?"

Unnoticed by Mario, Princess Peach visibly blushed and made a point to look everywhere but at one specific person in the mix of newcomers.

In the short second of silence, Nathan Drake stepped out of the crowd. "What can I say? Girls can't resist me." He winked at Peach, and her blush deepened.

Mario turned towards her, his look making it clear he was extremely disappointed and wanted an explanation.

"Well, Mario, I, um..." She fidgeted, and her already extremely red face somehow got even redder. "I mean, you've gotta admit it gets kind of old, when, um, when Bowser ki-kidnaps me, and then you save me. Um, again."

Mario wasn't convinced. His crossed arms and tapping foot made Peach pretty nervous, despite him being half her size. In response, Peach took a half-step back and attempted to make herself smaller.

"Oh, Mario! Just look at him! He's so tall and handsome a-and, um..."

One particularly nasty glare from Mario caused her voice to completely give out, and he turned back to Playstation's representatives, one of whom was grinning at Peach.

"We are-a Nintendo's mascots! We are-a dignified, and-a don't need to associate ourselves with this-a... rabble!

A wicked shining blade shot for Mario, which barely grazed his shoe as he leaped clear over it. The owner of said blade was currently screaming for blood and death - and looked willing to go to any lengths to get it. Samus Aran pointing her arm-cannon directly in his face didn't do anything to calm him down, and he launched himself towards her.

All hell broke loose at that point. Explosive weaponry was flying everywhere, brawls broke out between the multitude of characters; screams of rage, confusion, and enjoyment reached the ears of everyone present. Bowser was trying to duke it out with a giant shape-shifting mass of geometric objects, Sonic was running circles around Crash Bandicoot, and Drake was dodging a flurry of flashing bombs thrown by some elf-kid.

And then funky music started playing out of nowhere, and everyone spontaneously started dancing. All except one fox-thing with a robot on its back.

"Guys, come on, we need to still be alive for the tournaments, right?"

"I'LL KILL YOU, ANNOYING FOX!" Kratos screamed.

"Lombax," Ratchet corrected.

And so they were all treated to the contradictory and amusing image of a God of War angrily dancing the hula. They might have laughed were they not facing similar situations themselves.

Unnoticed by all of them came the steadily raising sound of jet engines blasting their way through the sky. Only when people realized they were there did the cause show itself: a vaguely bird-shaped machine making a beeline right towards them. They all might have been crushed by it if Ratchet hadn't pulled out an extremely oversized gun that blasted way, WAY too many rockets to the tune of Tchaikovsky's 1812 Overture, launching the craft over their heads and crashing it safely past where they were gathered. A hatch flew off the top of it, and a bright red soldier peeked his head out.

"Hey, dudes! What'd we miss?" He gave a thumbs-up at them, oblivious to the surprised and hateful glares thrown his way.

And then the music stopped. As one, everyone launched themselves at the ship, which was quickly unloading itself of its passengers, and the battle started again.

In the midst of the chaos, Mario was able to crawl out. He brushed himself off and looked back at the mess of angry fighters. As if Sony rearing its ugly head wasn't enough, Microsoft had to make an appearance too! Could this day get any worse?

Mario suddenly felt a powerful presence behind him. He turned around and beheld the warping, whitish-fractal pattern indicative of one of Them. The Them called out to Mario, and he felt compelled to listen. "Mario! You forgot your little friend from Ubisoft! He was real eager to be here!"

A small rabbit-like thing pointed its head out from behind the Them's ethereal presence, proclaimed "Bwah!" and rushed to tackle Mario, completely forgetting about the gun held in its paw.

It was at that moment that Mario knew, things could definitely get worse.

The Them laughed - this was the best idea he'd had in ages! The others may accuse him of recycling, but no, he was genius!

Author's Note:

GM:
When this was originally made, I wasn't going to make it canon, thinking it was ridiculous and silly. Now, I can officially stamp approval on it. Just throw a Them in there and everything works fine. Enjoy this insanity, and as always blame Them for everything.

Written by the silly Ponygood.

Comments

[RoboRed]

Silly chaos problem? Just add Them™.
Problem fking solved(?).