Seeking Advice
More than two weeks later at Canterlot Castle.
“Celestia! My little Sun!” Starswirl the Bearded fondly greeted.
Celestia, with a genuine warm smile on her face, was filled with a wave of sweet nostalgia.
“Thank you for coming, wise Master!”
Starswirl, smiling with a grandfatherly expression, shook his head.
“You have now a thousand years of advantage over me. When I left you, you were but the learner; now you are the Master.”
Celestia shook her head in return.
“I wouldn’t be the pony I am now, weren’t it for you! Please, don’t sell yourself short, Starswirl.”
“Look who’s talking!” Starswirl chuckled.
Fond memories came to his mind.
“You have become so big! I still remember when you were small enough for me to pick you up!”
Celestia’s smile grew wider.
“Oh yes, I have a lot of happy mem-...”
“You were so ADORABLE!” he interrupted.
Like many old people, Starswirl couldn’t help but to squeeze her cheeks (her FACIAL cheeks, of course!).
If he had hands, he would have pinched them. Frankly, how can ANYONE withstand the temptation to squeeze and pinch two puffy wuffy pony cheeks, when they are so readily presented in front of them?
Celestia chuckled awkwardly and felt quite a bit embarrassed.
“Tee hee hee... Pweathe thtop thap, Thtarthwirl!”
She gently moved his hooves away with hers.
“Now, as for why I summoned you...”
She shifted in her seat and averted her eyes slightly.
“...You don’t happen to know a spell that helps with... constipation?”
Starswirl’s eyes went wide.
“By my beard, Celestia! There is not a single Wizard in the world who could ever even dream of unraveling the mysteries of the bowel! Didn't I teach you that?!”
Celestia closed her eyes and sighed.
“Yes, I knooow... It was just a faint hope that right now died.”
After a moment, she opened her eyes and looked at Starswirl again.
“Do you then happen to know a way how to properly control vast amounts of power?”
The old Master raised an eyebrow.
“How much power are we speaking of here?”
“The Sun.”
Again, Starswirl’s eyes went wide.
“I... *cough*… I’m afraid that’s equally impossible. It’s already hard enough to move it, let alone control its power!”
Celestia nodded, although with disappointment in her eyes.
“Mhm... I feared as much.”
“Why are you asking me such puzzling questions? It can’t be a silly reason, I know you that much.”
“Well, you will most likely remember my attitude towards exerting violence...”
“Oh? Even in over a thousand years that hasn’t changed?”
“If anything, it got worse. My sole rule was like Tartarus to me and once I had Twilight Sparkle, I finally got some rest. But now...
I can’t just ask her to use the Elements of Harmony all the time anymore. It is my turn again to defend the land. But the cost...”
She looked away, er lips were pressed together and tears started to run down her cheeks.
Starswirl levitated a handkerchief over to her face.
“Oh, my poor little Sun... You’ve made so many sacrifices and you still do. Just like when you were small.”
He dried her tears away.
“Have you tried talking to your foes?”
Celestia sniffled.
“I did. But most of the time they just won’t listen. It took me centuries to teach Ponykind the values of Friendship and Harmony. How can one expect each new villain to learn these things on the fly?”
Starswirl thought for a while.
“Well... The only advice I can give you, is to endure and keep learning about Friendship. One day you will be so proficient in it, that your talking just might suffice.”
Celestia lifted her head and smiled lightly, yet there was pain in her eyes.
“Yes... You’re right. All I can do, is go on and hope for the best.”
A Royal Guard suddenly entered the room.
“Your Highness, we have a situation! A group of Dragons is causing trouble in Canterlot Central Park and asking them kindly to stop doesn’t work! We are at our wit’s end!”
After grinding her teeth with enough pressure to create diamonds, the diarch slowly stood up with a painfully wide grin and a twitching eye, while chanting in a sarcastic sing-song voice:
“Speak of the deviiiiil!”
***
Outside, on one of the castle’s large balconies, Celestia and Starswirl could see a group of four huge Dragons, making themselves at home at Canterlot’s central park.
Celestia groaned after recognizing the apparent leader.
“Augh! That’s Torch! He’s such a plothole! Since he retired, he’s doing nothing but horse apples with his time!”
“Watch your language, young Lady!” Starswirl angrily scolded.
But when he noticed that the Dragons were ruining the grass with their giant feet, he dashed to the edge of the balcony, fuming, and yelled while violently swinging his clenched hoof:
“GET OFF THE LAWN, YOU WHIPPERSNAPPERS!!!“
Not that they could hear him though.
Celestia, rubbing her temples intensely, left out a looong sigh and steeled herself for the upcoming ordeal of literally draconic proportions.
“Well... If life gives you lemons...”
She squinted her eyes.
“...squish them!”
With that she took off into the air.
***
Okay, Celestia. The Dragons are our allies now and Torch’s daughter is their Lord. You can certainly solve this in a diplomatic way. Then you ALSO won’t have to worry about so many ponies seeing you do... um… your thing.
Calmed by these thoughts, the Princess entered the park’s airspace.
The scene below her wasn’t exactly pleasant...Torch and his buddies of equal size were lazing around in the park, without any consideration for public property or other creatures, especially ponies.
Fortunately, nopony had been hurt so far.
At least physically... Many tears were shed over the loss of the open-air stage, that was scheduled for a Mime performance that day. The ducks in the ponds had fled in panic, never to return again. What were the elder ponies going to do with all the bread crumbs they’ve been saving? The playground had been ground into a giant hole by a humongous Dragon butt, leaving an even bigger hole in the hearts of all the little foals.
Celestia had to do her very, VERY best, to not immediately (and literally) explode in anger. She darted down, stopping in front of Torch’s face. The massive drake hardly noticed her and was scratching himself with an uprooted lamppost.
“WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU’RE DOING, TORCH?!!!”
she bellowed in her Royal Canterlot Voice.
Torch’s eyes lazily wandered over to her, his stupid smile not faltering.
“Oh, it’s you, Uselesstia!”
“ANSWER ME POSTHASTE!!!”
“Relax! Aren’t we friends now, little pony? And don’t friends share?”
“NOT BY RUINING IT FOR EVERYPONY ELSE!!! WHAT WILL EMBER SAY TO THIS?!!!”
“Well, Ember isn’t here right now, is she?”
“LEAVE!!! NOW!!!”
“I don’t feel like it.”
He turned to his three companions.
“Do you?”
“Nooooooo, duuuude!” they answered in unison.
Torch turned back to Celestia.
“See? There’s nothing I can do! Oh, excuse me! I meant: There’s nothing YOU can do!”
They all laughed like thunder.
The temperature around Celestia was dangerously high and caused the air to flicker. Her teeth and hooves were clenched.
“Don’t... make... me...!”
Torch wasn’t impressed.
“Or what? Will you spend the afternoon in a cocoon again?”
Remembering that there was a diplomatic way to handle this, Celestia swallowed her anger as best as she could, and put on a serene, neutral expression.
“Torch… I think you’ve misunderstood some fundamental concepts of Friendship. If you would just come with me to a less crowded place, we could calmly talk about…”
Torch wasn’t paying any attention to what she was saying but then he noticed something on the ground.
“OOOH! What do we have here?!”
A little foal with a lollipop the size of its head was standing close, staring in awe at the colossal lizard.
“Woooow... Dragons are so COOL!” the heart-meltingly cute foal said.
Suddenly, two of Torch’s gigantic claws rapidly picked the lollipop from the small hooves and delivered the piece of candy to his monstrous maw.
And naturally, the little foal started to cry.
Celestia’s expression remained neutral at first.
But then the forces inside her caused her eyes to bulge, her mouth line to go squiggly and she exhaled smoke…
With a few lightning-quick punches (one for each Dragon), she sent them flying on a ballistic course back to where they came from.
After that she calmed down a bit.
Celestia, still hovering in the air, held her poor grumbling belly. But this time, a smile crept on top of her grimace.
“Worth it! Ugh!”
Then she noticed something all around the park beneath her...
Countless ponies, there had to be thousands, were just staring at her, jaws dropped and not moving a muscle. At that one moment, Canterlot was the most silent place in the world.
Celestia didn’t move and just stared back.
After twenty seconds she lifted her hooves and smiled apologetically.
“I can explain...?”
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Pahahahahahahaha!
Well, cat's out of the bag now, C.
Welp... How will Celestia explain this now that everyone saw her
I see it now, all the newspapers in Equestria with headlines about how powerful Celestia really is.
Maybe Twilight will find one of those in her vacation
... All hail Torch! Savior of the park!
Welp, there goes the masquerade.
Twilight gets all the praise again, training Celestia?
9583904
I love it.
9585733
"Dragons are actually scale-covered balloons. Filled with vast amounts of helium. That's why they can fly with such tiny wings. It's also really easy to move them around. ... Mmyep."
'ey look! She didn't kill anybody! Progress!
ONE PUUUUUUNCH!!!
9585986
true but they have a really bad habit of eating things that don't belong to them even humans or in this case ponies ^^;
9586100
I was answering your previous post, as theoretical Celestama.
Did you really had to?
9585986
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j0j0Bjy6hFc
“My little ponies. I can only fight at this level when a foal cries. I had wanted to avoid traumatized foals, so I had Twilight handle it. That is all.”
"Ember! Celestia hit me!"
9586249
you brought back fond memories with that link. :3
9586505
THEY brought back my fond memories by implying dragons are like blimps.
You know, Celestia, it's great that everypony follows your reign out of love and not fear, but maybe it wouldn't be so bad to just let them know about your strength?
Try this. Instead of erasing everypony's memories of a fight where you defeat (explode) an enemy, just let that information get spread around and see if it doesn't strongly dissuade future aggression against you or Equestria.
Even if you don't care at all about the sanctity of the mind or a pony's right to remember things that affect them, your bowels will probably thank you.
9585986
hydrogen would make more sense really, as helium is not flammable.
9586618
Yes, let's have the most excitable, panic-ridden, over-reacting species on the planet have to deal with the fact that they already worship The Dawnmother as a god even though all these other powerful entities think she's weak... and then find out that she can destroy the planet effortlessly if she makes even a tiny mistake. "Right to remember/sanctity of their mind" means nothing when the whole nation could be in an uproar that would remove their ability to even be a nation over something that they're better off not knowing. Gods, I can see them destroying each other and themselves for no reason other than their natural equine instinct to panic which is only elevated by their sapience and ability to comprehend fear more potently.
Cue panic over a bunch of rabbits hopping through town, a town with some of the most hardened ponies in the world because of how close they are to evil magic monster central.
9586737
Ponies: Worship the "Dawnmother" and seek her protection in a dangerous world
Also Ponies: Start panicking, revolting, and breaking down society when the Dawnmother whom they worship demonstrates an ability to protect them.
This is unrealistic.
9586801
It is, and yet it's the way our ponies work, somehow. Keep in mind, they're not humans, they're equines. Instinct is to mass-panic when something is scary. Again, 'bunny stampede'.
9586052
9585986
Well you could say they are full of hot air.
Hey! She Is getting better at controlling her power!! They didn't instantly die, they didn't explode, they were just shot off at super sonic speeds! That's amazing progress!! And it was all intentional too, so she can't say it was a fluke.
Well done celestia! Now to solve the bowel blockage problem, maybe she could find a nutritionalist, help her get more regular during the stressful times.
The explanation: "I... uhm... I got trained in the Hyperbolic Time Chamber yesterday! Eh-heh..."
Random pony, "That makes sense!"