Foxbrony
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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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I this anthro ponies or humans version of ponies
9649499
They are canon ponies, on all fours and the like.
The first thing that comes to mind when I read this in the description....
is...... (2:34)
9650016
..................... plot twists??? Something to look into unless you're just messing with me but either way, funny video. Anyway thanks for the critic
I can't tell if you're serious or if you used the 'main character came from huge hybrid world' just to make him overpowered with so many things at his access.
Great story, can't wait for the next one,
9650823
While it does seem he is overpowered, if he came up against someone like Discord or Celestia or Luna he'd be hard pressed to even get level with them. While I don't intent to nerf him, I'm working on making him not seem too OP. Thanks for the comment and hope you continue to read.
9651415
Discord, yes, the other two? No. They were only powerful back in their prime, not unless this AU of yours has them as powerful.
9651436
You definitely got a point there, about them not being in their prime anymore, I'll really take that into consideration when writing their interactions with each other. Thanks for the feedback, it's really helpful!!!
9651466
No problem. To be honest, you should of gone in a different direction, instead of him having powers from so many universes, I'd stick giving only what is needed, or start with a small number and give him more powers as the story progresses.
9651475
Thanks, you just made me realize I fell for the most obvious fault of new writers, "give the main character a bunch of powers off the bat without having to work for them". Now I've kinda got an idea for a skill set and I'm going to expand on that, again thanks for the critic and the feedback.
9651505
No problem. ^^
9651415
I mean...
That's still alittle OP since those three are basically gods...
9652309
Maybe, but I kind of see it as Celestia and Luna more as maybe demi-gods rather than gods and Discord being the true god between the three of them. But I'm still working on their interactions when they meet and so on, so I still have some polishing to do before it gets there. Thanks for the comment and the critic!!!
All those universes on one planet and it hasn't destroyed itself yet?
I don’t understand how people can not like a story that’s only one chapter and hasn’t gotten to the actual story yet.
9657294
I don't blame people for having an opinion, they can choose to dislike it if they want, its my job as the author to hopefully change their minds and getting them to liking it. So I hope I do a good job, thanks for commenting!!
9657403
You’re welcome. It’s just that there wasn’t enough there to make an opinion like that, but what was there was enjoyable to me, and a good intro to the story.
9657294
They're judging it according to the description.
any idea when we can expect an update and new chapter?
9663802
I've rewritten the next chapter a few times now and the good news is that it's starting to come together now and I think that I should have it uploaded in a few days, thanks for the comment and hope you enjoy the next chapter!!
you are going to fast on the righting
I agree, try spacing out whats happening with some backstory, or at least try to do some dialogue between The Apples and Brush, but this isn't bad there is a bunch of potential and I'd like to see more. Have a like and a favorite.
9674397
Thanks for the advice, I'll try to flesh out the dialogue and beef up the fight descriptions. Thanks for the like and fav!!!!!
9674015
Thank you for the advice, it was my first attempt at writing a fight scene, and I'll start pacing myself and fleshing out the fight scenes. Thanks for the comment!!!
9675473
your welcome
Can't wait for the next chapter 2 come out
Question what bending will he be able to do and what jutsus is he able to do?
9703810
Earth and Water bending, and as for jutsu he can use I can't list all of them in this one comment but I'll list a few of them; Earth Release: Double Suicide Decapitation Technique, Earth Release: Earth and Stone Dragon, Shadow Clone Jutsu Earth/Water/Lightning Clone Jutsu, Water Release: Water Dragon Bullet Technique, Water Release: Water Beast Technique, Wind Release: Divine Wind Technique, Wind Release: Great Breakthrough, Lightning Release: Electromagnetic Murder Technique, and Lightning Release: False Darkness Technique.
9704790
So hes human? which species of human?
9704799
Well he certainly looks human, but that isn't all that he is ;). His adopted family is Khajiit and they know what his origins are but, he doesn't like others knowing because they judge him harshly on the actions of the past of his birth family.
9704819
Oh ok
Nice
any idea when we can expect an update and new chapter?
9722404
I've got about three fifths of the chapter done, I've just got to work out a few more scenes and work on an ending and do some editing before I post it. Hopefully I'll have it up and posted by Friday, but I hope to have it up sooner.
this is a great story you have here, hope to see more sometime
It just sucks that my niece is such a savage blackmailer........... I think I taught her too well'.
any idea when we can expect an update and new chapter?
9892204
Agreed i hope a new one comes out soon
This was a awesome and sad start.
He is a awesome fighter,I'm happy pear butter and Bright Mac are alive and ok. I guess in this AJ and Big Mac know there Mother is a pear. Can they have a few pear trees.
This was a beyond epic and more satisfying end to this chapter.
any idea when we can expect an update and new chapter?
lol
Khajiit has wears if you have coin