• Member Since 11th Mar, 2012
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GaPJaxie


It's fanfiction all the way down.

Sequels1

T
Source

This story is a sequel to Courtesans


Princess Cadence adopted a changeling, and now little Cheval is Flurry Heart's younger sister. As old enemies resurface, their sisterly love may be all that can save the Crystal Empire.

Chapters (9)
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Comments ( 359 )

Huh. Well let us see what new things this universe has to show us.

Definetly some questions about the exile.

So happy to be back in this universe.

So is what happened with Flurry meant to be a mystery at this point, or did I miss a story? :derpytongue2:

9527423

It's meant to be a mystery at this point! Something that had Flurry out of sorts, to be sure.

9527368

So am I! I wasn't sure I could write a third story in it, but I ended up feeling very happy with this one.

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It's a very nice exile. You know, considering.

"She was a teenager, in many ways. Her ascension had halted the aging process at sixteen, and she would never mature a day henceforth. She never appeared with a stallion or with children, and no matter how many times she learned the same friendship lessons, they caught her by surprise yet again."
...Well, that took a sudden turn! :D
I suppose that's one way to continually embody friendship...
edit: (...Though I don't remember off the top of my head whether we already knew that. Well, perhaps not to this extent, at least.)

"wings against her side, she"
"wings against her sides, she"?

"Your kids and princes and"
"Your kids are princes and"?

"ponies you love and there to"
"ponies you love are there to"?

"you about something. “I’ve been thinking"
"you about something. I’ve been thinking"?

"informed passerbys that the"
"informed passersby that the"?

"Five feet off the floor"
Hm. What's the average pony height in this universe? Or griffon height? Can they even see out of that?

...Well, I assume that what's going on with Flurry and the exile will be explained eventually. :)
Wasn't expecting to see this story! :D

It takes a certain philosophical and aesthetic mindset to paint concrete gray.

Loving this already, Jaxie.

Naming your filly "Cheval" , when you are a pony like race.... It's like a human naming their child "Monkey" , you have to wonder if they are cruel or just that lacking in the naming department :rainbowlaugh:

Light Step and Double Time were there as well, celebrating their twentieth year as friends with benefits who refused to even acknowledge they were in a relationship much less consider getting married. Light was sketching Shining on a notepad while she waited for dinner to start. Double Time was trying to rescue him, interrupting the fussing with a story about the time Cadence put her in a jar.

Is twenty years right? If Cheval is sixteen that doesn't seem right since Light Step and Double Time didn't get together together until after Cheval was given over to Cadence and Shining Armor.

Also makes me wonder how Light Step and Twilight get along now that Light Step is physically more than twice her sister's visible age and (hopefully) mental maturity. It makes her the big "little" sister.

Her ascension had halted the aging process at sixteen, and she would never mature a day henceforth. She never appeared with a stallion or with children, and no matter how many times she learned the same friendship lessons, they caught her by surprise yet again.

This part hit me unexpectedly hard. Poor Twilight. :pinkiesad2:

9527425
It is a pretty nice exile; she’s not even imprisoned!

Well, except for having the bottom bunk. That’s like being imprisoned, kinda.

I'm not sure I buy what you're doing with Twilight, from a canon standpoint. We've seen in the show that her character has grown both physically (her model has gotten taller) and mentally since season three. It's a really interesting idea, though, and I wouldn't mind if this was an AU. Still, I'm definitely hooked so far.

I really wnjoyed the previous two, so I'm looking forward to this one. Anyone getting a communist vibe from the Griffons here? GLORY TO ARSTOKA.

Also, damn, that short mention of Twilight is kinda depressing.

>Your kids and princes and princesses
should probably be "your kids are"

9527480

"She was a teenager, in many ways. Her ascension had halted the aging process at sixteen, and she would never mature a day henceforth. She never appeared with a stallion or with children, and no matter how many times she learned the same friendship lessons, they caught her by surprise yet again."
...Well, that took a sudden turn! :D

Recall that in the last story, Twilight was afraid this was the case. Now it's confirmed!

I suppose that's one way to continually embody friendship...

And Cadence is forever in her late twenties (or early thirties, I don't have a specific age in mind), just at the age when ponies are getting married and really coming to understand love.

In her mind, she and Shining will always be newlyweds.

"wings against her side, she"
"wings against her sides, she"?

"Your kids and princes and"
"Your kids are princes and"?

"ponies you love and there to"
"ponies you love are there to"?

"you about something. “I’ve been thinking"
"you about something. I’ve been thinking"?

"informed passerbys that the"
"informed passersby that the"?

See this is why you're awesome and in the forward of my anthology book. :D

I’m excited to see what happens..

9527619

To quote the last story:

"But this one is named Cheval.” Double Time reached up to grasp Shining’s hooves, showing him the correct way to hold the grub. “It is a play on words. In vespid, it means ‘horse’ but it is phonetic with another word that refers to an archaic type of mirror.”

“Horse-mirror?” Shining smiled, and grub clung to his leg. Then it started to drool.

9527693

Is twenty years right? If Cheval is sixteen that doesn't seem right since Light Step and Double Time didn't get together together until after Cheval was given over to Cadence and Shining Armor.

Whoopsiedoodle. That's a plot hole. Corrected, with thanks. :twilightsmile:

Also makes me wonder how Light Step and Twilight get along now that Light Step is physically more than twice her sister's visible age and (hopefully) mental maturity. It makes her the big "little" sister.

They get along a lot better.

Twilight is forever sixteen, but she knows she's forever sixteen. She can't stop getting flustered over boys and friendship problems, but she can recognize that she's doing it. Having a "big sister" around to talk her through things is helpful. It gives them something to bond over.

Light, for her part, isn't sure how to feel about Twilight's eternal youth. She both pities and envies Twilight.

9527842

Just to remind you what kind of story this is!


9527896

I really wnjoyed the previous two, so I'm looking forward to this one. Anyone getting a communist vibe from the Griffons here? GLORY TO ARSTOKA.

"Papers, please." :twilightsmile:

Also, thanks for pointing out that typo. Corrected!

9527889

Added the AU tag for clarity. That was my bad! Glad you're enjoying it so far.

Ooooooooooh, you liar. You said you hadn't been writing.

:yay:

9528176

I wrote this right after that conversation!

9528202
How the hell crystal empire lost war again changeling

9528277

This is the third story in a series! You don't need to read the first two to understand it, but if you want to read the first two, they explain the war.

9528289
What i know is that changeling need love

Seems bit edgy and directionless. Why did she had to be adopted? What's up with "exile"? One paragraph she's celebrating with her family, next - she's a runaway.

9527996
"Recall that in the last story, Twilight was afraid this was the case. Now it's confirmed!"
Yay? :D
(And thanks for the reminder.)
(And neat. :))

"And Cadence is forever in her late twenties (or early thirties, I don't have a specific age in mind), just at the age when ponies are getting married and really coming to understand love."
Ah, thanks.

I wonder what ages Celestia and Luna stopped at, if they have the same effect?

"In her mind, she and Shining will always be newlyweds."
:)

"See this is why you're awesome and in the forward of my anthology book. :D"
Heh, thanks. :)

9528002
"Whoopsiedoodle. That's a plot hole. Corrected, with thanks. :twilightsmile:"
Oh, whoops! Sorry for not pointing that out. Particularly since I did at first think it sounded a bit odd but then (apparently unfortunately mis)remembered a way it might work, and was too low on time to check.

"Light, for her part, isn't sure how to feel about Twilight's eternal youth. She both pities and envies Twilight."
Yeah. I mean, on the one hoof, it is better than eternal life at, say, a creaky ninety-five, but...

9528509
Did you read the other previous stories?

Light Step and Double Time were there as well, celebrating their sixteenth year as friends with benefits who refused to even acknowledge they were in a relationship much less consider getting married.

Awww they're so cute together :twilightsmile:
I wonder if they'll stop being stubborn and marry before the parents get too old.

Poor Twiggles, her friendships must be getting weird. And her toy collection big.

Light Step and Double Time were there as well, celebrating their sixteenth year as friends with benefits who refused to even acknowledge they were in a relationship much less consider getting married.

Well, that's certainly different from how we were last left off in their relationship. I thought they would never see each other again.

9528002 What kind of a changeling fic would it be without holes? :)

Ooooh, loved the first two, very excited for this one.

Heh, that bit with Cheval telling off her bio mom was priceless and heartwarming. Definitely a win for nurture over nature.

9528509
For the adoption part, go read at least the previous story. Preferably both previous stories.

As for the exile, it seems to be implied that it will be explained later, so just quit whining and be patient.

Hmm... is the picture on the cover of Cheval correct? I wish to draw her but seeing that she has orange eyes in the story gives me pause. Or is that just her changing it up?

9530016

It's more or less correct -- I wasn't quite able to find a picture with the eye color I wanted. But she's a shapeshifter, so let's say she's trying something new.

Can I read this without reading Courtesans? I read The Tird Wheel and loved it, but sex makes me uncomfortable, unless it's a very brief mention.

Well now. Always nice to see more of this universe, especially with an opening like that. I like Cheval already; I especially like how in terms of both her attitude towards her family and her approach to education, she's Light Step's polar opposite. I just hope she doesn't starve to death halfway through her first semester.

9527842
Agreed. That's the kind of twisted curse that only the truly devious cook up. "May you live forever, your mind eternally that of a teenager." And I can only imagine how it strained her relationship with her friends as they outgrew her. :fluttershyouch:

9530157

Yes, you can read this story without reading the others.

9527425

Is it just me or does that "student building" look more like a converted prison than anything else? A few bars and iron doors is all that's missing.

9530219
They probably used the same blueprint, with the absolute minimum effort put in to convert it away from being an actual prison. Kind of interesting to see really, the similarities to the Soviet Union are not coincidental here, this sort of thing tends to be the result when a massive country subjects itself to forced industrialization.

9530219
9530335

Yup. Communist brutalist architecture is fascinating to study -- not so nice to actually live in.

9528289
Think I will, cause i like the premise but confused in some areas. Like if the Queen wanted the kingdom, why didn't she just take it since she won the war? Was it a Pyrrhic victory and all she could do is demand they take her daughter as an heir?

9530418
Probably more like continuing the war to the bitter end would have turned it into a Pyrrhic victory, with one side being severely mauled and the other being annihilated. Real life is often like this, wars rarely drag on to the bitter end with one side or both refusing to back down; as doing so can inflict catastrophic damage to both sides.

Things are looking up for this family, and im glad things are starting to work out. Its also nice that Amaryllis' little plan didnt work out the way she wanted, hehehe. Im looking forward to seeing what happens next! :twilightsmile:

Comment posted by Bast deleted Mar 26th, 2019

Read through the trilogy so far yesterday and really enjoyed it! Looking forward to updates from here on out :twilightsmile:

I was attracted by the concept alone. Interesting stuff — my eyebrow is r a i s e d

This chapter is kind of paced kind of... weird. I just felt like not enough time was spent getting intimate with the story. Way too much cold narration. Fortunately, that's about the only problem I spotted.

And I am in LOVE with this description right here:

All the buildings were very modern, made of fresh concrete and fitted with sockets for electrical lamps—but the lamps had evidently never arrived.

This is actually brilliant. I could pick apart how this is such great "texture," but I'll look silly. Ask me if you want me to praise it, cos I will do so gladly. I promise there was more to enjoy than just that, though!

9530214
Oh, thank you! How strong is the 'sex' in Courtesans? I love your work, so if it's just talking about sex, then I'll probably read it soon!

9531469

One short scene no explicit description. No smut to any degree, just veiled references.

9531586
Right, will be reading it pronto! Thank you again!

For a species that feeds itself by giving love, I wonder if that leaves them somewhat vulnerable to abuse (making themselves see the good in persons in which there is none, or they starve). In which case, Flurry's letter is all the more touching.

Unless you decide to gauge out my heart next chapter and have Flurry's letter be a dramatic reveal that she has pony cancer.

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