• Member Since 27th Oct, 2013
  • offline last seen 20 minutes ago

Jay David

Just a guy from Britain who loves MLP.


One day, Lyra gets invited by her friend Derpy to taste one of her new muffin recipes. Lyra eagerly accepts, but with that fateful bite, she soon finds herself in a situation so horrific that words cannot do it justice.

Chapters (1)
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Comments ( 33 )
Stonecreek #1 · 2 weeks ago · · 22 ·


But I wanted to see Derry go all Pinkie a la Cupcakes. The subversion was actually the expected outcome. Seeing such a fan favorite go dark...now that would've been appealing. Still, worth a chuckle, and the trope got me to read it in the first place.

Flisky #2 · 2 weeks ago · · ·

"The E-rated fic is E-rated, how awful!"

Now where did she come up with that idea?

Much later:

An expression of puzzlement crossed Derpy's features.

"Soo...you were joking about Princess Twilight's lecture dungeon?"

Rainbow Dash facehoofed,

Well. That's one way to lead readers on of a Cupcakes fic Derpy Version

I wasn't expecting a parody of Cupcakes.

Derpy has a unique approach to sharing her hobbies.

Derpy is adorable, and its funny how much she knows about Muffins to such an advanced degree. Though her methods of sharing this hobby are questionable at best.

Neece #9 · 2 weeks ago · · ·

Adorable Derpy's adorable.

Well, to be honest that's definitively something I'd expect from Twiggles.

Ri2 #10 · 2 weeks ago · · ·

This actually isn't the first time I've seen a Cupcakes parody featuring Derpy...but this one is much, much more horrible.

Why hasn't she let those other mares go yet? When WILL she let them go?


I thought it was going to be something like Muffins. It was a prequal to cupcakes but it was darker and more grotisic, It's a good watch.


Oh, they're free to go. They're just too traumatized to find the will to do so. :rainbowlaugh:

For those expecting otherwise...

Derpy does Muffins, not Cupcakes.

you silly fillies... :trollestia:

Wait, wait, wait.

Sleeping pills taste like chalk. How could they possibly improve the muffin flavor?

No... wait... this is Derpy the muffin mare we’re talking about here. I’m sure she found a way to do it.

But, talking about torture, she didn’t offer Lyra another muffin! For shame!

That got a laugh out of me.

"It's...it's too late for you. It was...horrible! Oh, it was so horrible!"

I feel like one has three guesses as to who just spoke.




Poor Lyra.
Derpy is a cruel sadistic monster.

Whew! I'm so relieved. I don't know why, but I was half-expecting the rating to be a lie. :twilightsheepish:

I can't really say anything else.

I think that's all that needs to be said really.

Poor Lyra.... I'll never look at a muffin rack the same way after this story. Traumatized for life.

Rainbow Dash may have thought she was joking. Starlight knew better.

I am a muffin cultist and I approve of the Muffin Queen's methods!

Today's flavor is banana nut.

Goddammit, this is too amazing.

I thought this was some lesbian fix but then I saw the rating:raritycry::fluttershysad:

(Me, reading the story):
"I wonder where this is going... sleeping pills? Wait a second, wasn't this story called Muffins? Does that have something to do with Cupca-"


...I enjoyed this.

"Besides, this is a great opportunity for me to teach you about the age of legislation, where pony bureaucrats attempted to pass laws restricting the number of ingredients that could be held in a single muffin."
Realising what she was going to have to put up with for an hour, Lyra suddenly gained the same horrified look as the other mares, and looked right up to the ceiling.

I agree Lyra, this is worse then being in an iron maiden.

Sergeant Sprinkles, meet Corporal Blueberries.

So nice!

9611195 I have tropical fruit-flavored sleeping pills! *munches on a few handfuls* Mmmmm... tangy!


*nothing happens... for Alondro IS AN AAAAAAAALIEN!!!* :pinkiegasp:


Derpy does Muffins, not Cupcakes.

A muffin is just a naked cupcake, don'tchaknow?


Sleeping pills taste like chalk. How could they possibly improve the muffin flavor?

Maybe it had r̸̭̬͙̠͠a̫̤̤͘i̸̼s̸̱i̴̖ͅn̮̹̬̩̤̮̕̕͜s in it?

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