• Member Since 5th Dec, 2011
  • offline last seen 11 hours ago

Wordy Notes


T

After Rainbow Dash goes to investigate unusual weather, she encounters a pegasus with powerful weather manipulation abilities who calls himself the Storm Stallion. She then finds herself thrust into a quest to recover an ancient artifact with great power in order to save Ponyville and hopefully prevent her own death. To do so, she'll have to rely on help from her friends, some unexpected allies, and her own skills in order to triumph over evil and stop future events from becoming a reality.

Chapters (12)
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Comments ( 11 )

Interesting first chapter as it was nice to see Rainbow Dash be a heroic again. :rainbowkiss:

This new upstart in Equestria is just asking for trouble and I do wonder how the rest of Mane 6 will react towards this interesting new menace ?:rainbowhuh:

Please do keep up the good work upon such a great tale like this one.

Interesting that Rainbow Dash now knows of her future fate and all that, but can she truly avoid what is to soon befallen upon her ? :rainbowhuh:

Please do keep up the good work upon such a great tale like this one as I cannot wait to read about what happens next in this storylike of yours. :rainbowkiss:

Intresting that all three comments start with "Intresting"
But seriously keep this going, its good.

Why do I get the bad feeling that this will not end well for either Fluttershy and Scootaloo ? :fluttercry:

Nice update to the overall storyline as it seems that time-travel is going to get a bit mess up for the following chapters.

Please do keep up the good work upon such a great tale like this one. :twilightsmile:

You get five stars. Sorry I havent rated sooner.

Oh look... another upstart. On a scale of gummy to discord, I rate him currently a Gummy +2, or a "Manticore with a bad hair day." Then again, Mr. Black there seems to be the villain here, so maybe I will re-rate his threat level shortly...

Ah yes... I remember something from "Next" regarding this...

"That's the funny thing about the future... you can never predict it and look into it to find out what will happen, because it changes every time you look at it."

I love the fact that Scootaloo essentially because the MMDW as her future self... it kind makes sense. Now I see the entire Mane cast becoming classical superheroes and forming a league of hooves to stop all evildoers more effectively than that bloodie useless royal guard the princesses have. Dang... why did the princesses not think of that sooner?

Future Scootaloo is no less a berzerk fangirl then the present one it seems... although that's topped off with righteous fury at Solstice here.

This was actually rather good for a story... almost something that could be written into the third season with some retooling.

I wonder if the guys at Hasbro do ascended fandom? If they did, this would probably belong at the top of the cantidates.

This is really cool. I had fun reading it, the story is well developed, the OC's are interesting and not Mary Sueish, which is always a plus and from what I have experienced, no easy feat for a first story so bravo :pinkiesmile:. I really like how well you kept the mane characters in character. I also like how there was never really a mane villain, I mean it could be argued that either Wind Runner or Solstice were the antagonist at times, but they weren't just outright evil, but instead had complex reasons for doing what they were doing, and it just so happened that their actions caused trouble for Ponyville, despite their actual intentions, so they certainly weren't generic and were instead relatable and actually made me hope that things would turn out well for them.

Now... There were some issues. While the story and plot were sound, the whole thing could use some editing, it felt... rough around the edges. You were repetitive in some places and there were minor grammar and spelling errors in others, nothing too serious, and certainly nothing a bit of editing couldn't fix, it's just something to keep in mind for your future works.

Beyond the minor issues, I really liked it, and like I said, the roughness wasn't too bad so I had no trouble getting through it, I hope to see more stuff from you in the future, I'm sure I will have just as much fun reading those as I did this, and trust me, this was all kinds of awesome... You know what? You just acquired another follower due to your serious story writing skills.

P.S.: I know I totally promised to read this at EFNW so I'm sorry it took me so long. I hope you find my commentary to be helpful :twilightsmile:

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