Fluttershy's world and life lost meaning as, one by one, her friends left her to do their own thing. With this, she came to the crashing realization that she has no exceptional talent that means anything in the modern world, like each of her friends, nor any aspirations or calling that she could fall back on. Now she's stuck with six pets and a floor wet with tears. Upon coming to this realization, she is forced faced the demons of her past and the hardships of living a seemingly meaningless life.
Chapters (7)
whoah. already seems like it a good story... but we'll see won't we?
This is an interesting dynamic of Fluttershy.
Good luck with the other chapters!
I had originally hoped that I would be able to do this as the first comment, but I'm incredibly slow... oh well.
Anyway, I'm pleasantly surprised that the only things I've found so far were positive! Thanks a bunch (even though they are very few, it's a good feeling nonetheless. :P) But that's not what I want! I want to hear the negative! I want criticism (preferably, constructive
)
So if you got it, say it!
A few mechanical mistakes, and the first chapter everypony seems a bit... out of character, if you will, but overall, a great story.
1052648 I agree, but usually when one is full of hate and is lonely and calm, they start to really think. especially when your around you can't stand? i'm guessing it's that sort of thing. well, that and she has much more time to herself.
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It is kind'a hard to make Fluttershy sound in character while being angsty and broody. :P It would defeat the purpose if she was like "I'm so angry and lonely, I could just scream! I... I mean... if that's okay with you, reader..."
But I know what Golden Delicious was referring to, and he was certainly right.
Rather impressive, it's rare to see Fluttershy be so negative (unless you count her dark half Hatard) so I am glad to say that I'm very much enjoying this...a story like this with Flutter's having anger and regret should not end happitly yet it should also be a life lesson if need be....this is rather very nice, be sure to seprate when others are speaking though. I'm hoping that Fluttershy will look into the mirror and see her personal demon Hatard soon and have a talk with her if your able to add her, I'll be reading more of this...also, will Peewee be added to the mix? You need any ideas, advice, or help, I got your back, peace.
You can just feel the anger and depression float around Fluttershy....damn, never thought Hatard would take control over Flutter this swiftly before, I'm not even sure she is aware of it at all....VERY NICE. I really like Winona, she's a really bad ass dog and will be added as a main to my own story: Lost soul of Equestria, soon.....Poor Applejack, it's not her fault she had to leave, wonder what will happen to Apple bloom....forgot to say that poor Tank had to go to another owner....damn. Onto the next one!
Fixed up the first chapter and second.fifth (I guess third? It's not really a full chapter, though) a tiny-winy bit (which had to be done twice because of my laptop overheating. Teaches me to save my work periodically, I guess). Stylized them a tad and fixed up a few things that were poorly worded. Will give the same treatment to chapter 2 in due time.
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Thank you for your kind words! I thought ahead on the Peewee dealio. While not overtly stated, Peewee is with Celestia, as Fluttershy doesn't exactly know how to care for Phoenixes. They're not really animals, after all. As for the Apple Bloom and Hatard situations, you'll just to wait and see. (Hint hint: Idk who Hatard is and Apple Bloom probably isn't going to be important.)
Also, feel free to message me when you post up your story, I'd love to read it!
I usually don't read sad things... especially with Fluttershy.
But this...i like. Please continue.
...somepony's depressed.
The surprisingly large amount of typos in chapter 4 has been greatly reduced.
Writing next memory, just got to think of names.
God, I am so dumb. I had chapter 3.5 done for so long and I never published it.
Anyway, it's up now.
I am really getting into this story, perhaps more than I should. However it's rare to see Fluttershy depressed in a manner like this and I enjoy it (bad person, I know). In a sense this is a bit like Forever is Forever, beside the obvious that it's Fluttershy/Applejack. It's similar in the sense all their friends moved on and left them behind, though here we see it from a little different perspective, and it's not far off in the future.
There's just one thing that is bugging me. If we come to a happy ending, it basically would break the mood for the rest of the story, so by that I'm expecting an ending fitting for that even if that'd be sad. But I guess that's just me, though I can't wait to see how you handle it when it comes to that point. After all, all her friends haven't even left yet (flashback wise), so I might be skipping ahead a little in this case.
Keep up the good work.
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As far as an ending goes, I have to be completely honest and say I literally have no idea what I'm going to be doing to conclude this thingamabob.
But be assured that I will attempt to handle it with the care it deserves.
That first paragraph ... woah. I hadn't realized she was that much of a wreck (like, seriously, I went back and skimmed the earlier chapters). It was an awesome opener, is what I'm trying to say.
The part about her making clothes for her animals, then realizing she was talking craziness was good, too.
One month for 2k words.
Am I good or what?
Joking aside, I know there will be shizzie tons of questions on the latest chapter. If it twists your panties to an intolerable degree, message me and I will explain (HYPER SPOILER ALERT). Otherwise, wait patiently until the next chapter and you shall see.
Nice chapter. I hope the next chapter will come little bit faster.
I have to agree on the hope for speed, but I don't blame you for the time; the poetry in this is beautiful.
So I don't remember where I was going after that like month+ hiatus from internet.
But it was going to get good
so
uh
yeah
I know what Fluttershy is feeling. All I have are my animal friends. I love them but i'm so lonely and sad. Sleep, booze and among other things are my way of getting through the loneliness.
It's killing me knowing this story will probably never be finished. :(
STOP IT! STOP MAKING ME CRY!
wow this is just like my life.(plz note that I was joking ok)
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Have we waited patiently enough or a few more years?