• Published 12th Mar 2019
  • 683 Views, 62 Comments

Return the Night, or no Deposit - totallynotabrony



Detective Fit is stuck on a case involving a spree of anti-lunar graffiti. There are no clues, and Fit is getting desperate. Desperate enough to call the craziest consultant he knows.

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Chapter 11

“Where are we going?” Haven asked.

It was a good question. Fit slowed his pace slightly and the two mares caught up.

“The obvious thing would be to go back to the office,” he said. There would be at least a few officers working nights and Fit, Haven, and Mirror could report the foalnapping.

“Why am I sensing a ‘but?’”

“Probably because they took Fit’s clothes so it’s right in front of you.”

Haven and Fit both turned to look at Mirror. She rolled her eyes. “Oh come on, you knew it was a joke.”

Smoothly continuing, Fit answered Haven’s question. “There’s not much to go on. I’m sure they’ll believe us, but all we have is circumstantial. Without knowing the identity of the ponies who grabbed us, it’s impossible to arrest them or directly implicate EUP. We could round up the cops and search the hospital. We might even find the dungeon where we were held. It would be a huge deal. But we don’t yet have a who or a why to go with the what.”

“Yeah, and Nosey would get his story,” huffed Haven, rolling her eyes. “I might be willing to stall the case a little just for that.” She looked at him. “So what do we do?”

“Why don’t we go to a magic show and think about it?” Mirror suggested.

Oh right. They should really see if Trixie was okay.

None of them had any money for cab fare after being stripped, so it was a long trot. Fit could have sent the pegasi ahead, but got the sense that none of them wanted to be alone right now. Getting thrown in a dungeon could do that.

The show venue was lit up as they approached, which Fit took as a good sign. He thought back to the flyer he’d seen, noting the end time of the performance, which was eight pm.

Just as they reached the front of the theater, the doors opened and a satisfied, talkative audience began to flow out. The three of them managed to fight the tide and slip into the building.

Trixie was busy selling merchandise at a small table near the door. Sales didn’t look overwhelming, so when they came in, she noticed them immediately.

“What happened to you?” she asked, taking in their disheveled appearance.

“I made the EUP foalnap me, and then these two decided to join the fun,” said Mirror.

Trixie nodded. “Okay.”

“You kind of left us there,” said Haven accusingly.

“Well, Trixie didn’t know how long your little operation was going to last, and she had a show to do.” Trixie gestured at the theater. “However, I did anonymously report a public disturbance at the hospital, just to get some officers over there. Did it help?”

“No,” said Haven.

Trixie shrugged.

“Well, thanks for doing more than the average citizen,” said Fit. “You also may be called to testify when this is all over.”

“Can you tell me about your escape, or would that make me unsuitable as a witness?”

“I think it would make you more suitable as a potential escapee if they ever found out you were a former Lunar Guard and decided to foalnap you too,” said Mirror.

There was a certain logic to that, so Fit told Trixie the story.

“Hang on,” she broke in, “Mare Do Well isn’t real, she’s a character Princess Twilight and her friends make up. Trixie would know, being knowledgeable about characters and also Princess Twilight.”

“That’s what I thought,” said Fit. Haven nodded.

“Well, I think she’s pretty cool,” said Mirror, shrugging. She paused, cocking her head. “You aren't Mare Do Well, are you, Trixie?”

“I guess the silhouette of her hat and cape could bear some resemblance,” said Fit. “But she was here at the show while we were being rescued.”

“We don’t know that,” said Mirror. “Trixie is the best at illusions.”

“I’m not Mare Do Well,” said Trixie.

“It’d be cool if you were,” said Mirror. “It’d simplify things, too.”

“Well, Mare Do Well isn’t our problem right now,” Fit reminded them.

“Well, what about evidence?” said Haven. “We can make arrests for assault on a police officer.” She gestured to the group of them. “We have witnesses for that. But right now we don’t have anything hard linking them to the graffitti.”

“We might find something when we make the raid,” said Fit.

Haven nodded. “We need to get some help and then go back to the hospital to make some arrests. The night shift at the department might be enough, but I would really be more comfortable with more officers. What about the Guard?”

“We don’t know if any active duty Solar Guards are part of this,” said Fit with a frown. “And bringing in the Lunar Guards will only rile up the faction inside the EUP even more.”

“What about County? You know somepony there, right?”

Fit nodded. “That could work.”

“If you need help, I could just call a Princess or two,” Mirror offered.

“You can’t just call a Princess to help the police!” Haven protested.

Mirror grinned. “Want to bet?”

Fit held up a hoof. He’d already lost control of the case to Mirror. There was no way he was going to give it to the Princesses. “I think we’ll be fine. We’ll stop by the office, go get Plowshore, and we’ll go to the hospital. We may want to swing by the Cure-Long house on the way.”

He paused. “But first, we need to go to the newspaper office. We’re going to tell Nosey that we called a Princess.”

Down at Nosey’s office, he seemed surprised when Mirror walked through the door. “That was a quick foalnapping.”

“Yep, in and out,” Mirror said, without any prompting or previous coaching from Fit. “But you know how it goes, now we have to go arrest them and do all that fun legal stuff. It might get a little heated, so Princess Luna is coming to ensure a smooth operation.”

Nosey was busy scribbling notes. “Who did you say the culprit was?”

“Well, we want to count out the suspects first before we make a judgement on which group a majority of them might belong to. Wouldn’t want to taint public opinion before the trial.”

“Is this still in relation to the graffitti case?” Nosey asked. “Would Princess Luna’s appearance have anything to do with the anti-lunar graffiti?”

“If I told you any more, you wouldn’t have time to get it into the late edition of the paper,” Mirror said.

Nosey glanced at the clock on the wall. “Right you are.” He stood up with his notes. “I’ll just get this down to the printer. And hey, thanks a lot. Update me later, will you?”

He left the room and the others headed for the front door. “Do we still owe him the full story?” Haven asked under her breath.

“Well, he didn’t end up helping us find Mirror, so no,” said Fit. Besides, Nosey probably wouldn’t trust them as sources when Princess Luna didn’t actually show up.

Assuming Princess Luna didn’t show up. Though he didn’t doubt Mirror could absolutely make that happen, he didn’t think she would.

But that aside, they actually needed to get on with the task in front of them. The trio headed for the police station.