• Member Since 6th May, 2012
  • offline last seen Nov 22nd, 2017

ChaoticHarmony


Hey guys! I write sadfics and sadfic accessories! Oh, and I also do comedy things. Yeah. Feel free to check out my stuff! And I hope you enjoy whichever story of mine you happen to be on! ^^

T

Death is something that drives the world. Hand in hand they walk around the land, Time and Death, the regents of Reality. The things that are unreal become apothesised, placed on the throne above the mortals and given powers above life itself.

{WARNING: SPOILERS ARE IN THE COMMENTS}

Chapters (2)
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Comments ( 18 )

>>It always picked up ponies and carried them places, though not for any long than their life-span.

long to longer

...
I really tried to find more mistakes... darn it.

also

Tia hanging herself made me laugh. So did Luna's reaction. It was really funny.

1047382 Claiming first posts are against the rules. And you are a sick person for laughing at it.

And I'll fix that error then.

>>“I know by now that you have despaired my passing,"

I'm picking apart the tense that your using here. Tia wrote the letter to the future Luna but here it uses past tense.
A better way of doing this while using correct tense would be something like- "I know that by now you would have despaired at my passing," or something like that. Fix the tense.

Other than that it looks good to me. The last paragraph seems a little...off... though it has no actual problems. I don't understand the last line where Tia says that Luna ended her pain. Especially confusing since Tia just said that she would have to live with her pain.:applejackunsure: Meh

Did you steal Stalwart Hide from Luna's Story? (You sly dog you.):trollestia:

You already killed Starswirl the bearded in a time jump and now you have Celestia kill him? What do you have against the guy?:rainbowhuh:

ALSO

forgive me for the comedy related reply to you blog post... THIS WAS FUNNY!:rainbowlaugh:

1047494 Uh... don't think I stole the name, and if I did I had no intention of doing so.

Looking at the other things currently.

1047406

fine no first post for me

i fixed it

ALSO

I'm ok with being a sick person. It really was funny.

I would say Celestia came out as a selfish self centered pony since all i saw in the letter were excuses.

If you kill yourself you end the suffering for you, but others around you suffer more then. Its easier to try and share it rather then just end it for you and not care about anyone else.

1051645

I still liked it though, who says you have to make a fic where every main character is right and thinks all through :rainbowlaugh:

When your desperate/depressed/hurt/million other things you dont think clearly is also the case so seeing who would hurt the most isnt always possible.

Has this got more chapters incoming or is it finished? asking because of the incomplete tag. :pinkiesmile:

1052053 Derp... I should fix that...

1052150

Pity, could have added twilights reaction to the news. To see a mortals perspective on the "death" of someone you considered immortal.

You are a cruel being, :fluttercry: you made me cry and hten laugh while crying at the end
i3.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/000/175/027/crying_luna_by_keanno-d49w9cq.gif
and you made luna cry :twilightangry2:

1052623 I am evil. Yes. I am. You're just now stating such a thing?

Just you wait till the Luna fic is completed.

why isn't there a luna emote?:trollestia:

yay! celestia died! all is happy in the world of fanfics!

Ha, I have to say that those kind of ideas are too well known to myself just as well. But I prefer writing at night anyways, so meh.

As usual I enjoyed the style so much. It's short, but the descriptions, especially Luna's embodiment of the night, are what I can hardly find in crafts of other authors. But somehow, this one seemed to have its problems with shortness. At this part:

The pony’s next words made her shoot up from her bed of cumulous puffs.

“We must make haste, come.”

I had to read twice to get the message. It felt a bit harsh to get thrown from this super-sweet description into such an fast-spoken and shortened dialogue.

Also, there is an double-space after "cumulous puffs" and cumulus is spelled without o. :trollestia:

I like it! :pinkiehappy:

Haha, I was actually expecting Celestia to survive better via immortal immunity and the like.

I find the image of Celestia swaying in the breeze hilarious

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