I opened my eyes, staring at the ceiling that I know all too well. I was feeling particularly lazy today, but I know I had to get up eventually and start the day. I went up to a sitting position, yawning as I stretched my limbs. I jolted my neck to each side. The satisfying 'crack' is always a pleasant thing to hear, and honestly, it never gets old.
I hopped off the bed, and immediately I was greeted by my vines. I probably would never figure out how these guys worked. Whenever I'm in the vicinity of a soil, they can appear anytime I needed them. They act out as a personal assistant of mine since my sister, Twilight Sparkle, had Spike as her assistant. And, they are handier than I can give them credit for, always able to find the slightest of things missing.
I smiled, petting the vines as I head to the bathroom. I quickly brush my tooth and head to the shower. I didn't bother for a hot shower. I always went for a cold shower as it always soothes me, and it made me calm. It also made me think much clearly.
Opening the faucet, I let the water brushes past my face as I closed my eyes, feeling the chill water slowly soaks my pale lavender coat.
It has been more than a decade since my accident and the shenanigans that followed suit. I'm uncertain if its the mind or just me, but I don't seem to remember my past no matter what I tried. Sure, I tried explaining the family about it, but they always brush it off. Well, at least Princess Celestia and Twilight listened, no matter how absurd they thought I was being.
Still, at least I had a caring family that accepted me as their apparent twin sister of Twilight. I can tell on that day that they were not expecting to had two more mouths to feed.
My time as a filly? Well, they have their ups and downs, just like the wheel of life. I still call bullshit on Celestia's School for Gifted Unicorn even though I am indeed not listed during the entrance exam. So, Dad and Mom filled out paperwork for me to enlist on the local school while I somehow still gets tutored by Princess Celestia.
The difference between the two lies on the specific things they taught, one's magic in general, and the other was the general things a typical school would teach its students.
Anyway, I finally enlisted at Celestia's School for Gifted Unicorns a couple of years back. Both Twilight and I are genetically considered twins, but the difference between the two of us is as clear as day. Twilight occasionally had a panic attack at least once every few months while I rarely even had one. Twilight's more on the introverted side while I leaned towards in between introvert and extrovert. And while I inherent some caliber of Twilight's ability, but unfortunately, I suck at magic. I don't have the control Twilight had. Miss Star Clarity learned that the hard way when she ordered me to replicate the same spell Twilight did in class.
I closed the faucet, levitating a towel my vines had generously offered me and starts drying myself. With that done, I headed out of my room towards the dining room, no doubt Spike had already made breakfast since I can smell his cooking the moment I exited.
"Hey, Spike, good morning," I greeted.
Spike smiled as he places a plate full of pancakes on the table, "Morning Twivine, I hope you're in for pancakes!"
"I'm always in for pancakes, Spike," I said, chuckling as I took a seat, levitating a slice.
"Hey, where's Twilight? I thought you'll wake her up by now." Spike said, looking around the room for my twins.
One thing that I liked the most in the morning is that I got to screw with Twilight due to her habits on sleeping in late. I love getting Twilight a wake-up call since a standard alarm clock won't do for her, especially when she was on her research streak, may Mr. Ring-a-lot be her last victim.
"She'll be up in the moment right about...now." There was a distinct 'thump' upstairs, then seconds later, a muffled screams can be heard throughout the tower.
"TWIIIIVIIIINE!"
"Yep, she's up," I beamed happily. Spike shook his head in amusement, starting to dig in onto his pancakes. It took Twilight awhile to join us, grumbling on her misfortune of living with me.
"I can't believe you keep waking me up like that," Twilight muttered, levitating her share of pancakes and eat her problems away.
I grinned, "Aww, come on Twilight, it wasn't that bad."
Twilight glared at me, then she sighed. "Okay, sorry, Twivine. I admit I am getting a little bit on edge for the past days."
Spike looks up from his food, speaking with his mouth full. "Owh, whay's vhat?"
"Spike, don't speak with your mouth full, please," I chided. Spike swallowed his food, scratching the back of his head with a sheepish grin.
"It was because of a prophecy that may or may not threaten the very lives of Ponies if we don't do something!" Twilight exclaimed, then slumped back to her seat.
I raised my eyebrow, "And that prophecy is?"
"Here," Twilight levitated a book out of the shelves and started to read it out loud. I noticed the book was called Predictions and Prophecies. Call me skeptical, but I'm not really into that sort of thing.
"Legend has it that on the longest day of the thousandth year, Nightmare Moon, with the aid of the stars, will escape her imprisonment on the moon and shall bring forth nighttime eternal!"
Twilight finishes rather dramatically, but it seems my skepticism started to rub onto Spike as he stared at Twilight with a frown on his face.
"Twilight, I'm sorry, but that doesn't sound likely to come true," Spike said.
"But the signs are there, the trajectory of the star almost aligned to one another like a trail, I saw it last night!"
I rolled my eyes, "Probably just a coincidence. Do I need to remind you about the 'end of the world' prophecy because some old calendar from an ancient civilization said so?"
"Yeah, that cause quite the panic, but thankfully Princess Celestia manage to handle that," Spike added, finishing the last of his pancakes.
Twilight sighed, the odds are not on her favors, and she'll probably have a hard time convincing the both of us to help on whatever she was doing.
"What if it was true?" Twilight asked, stunning the both of us. "What if, against all of the odds, the prophecy is true and all along, there was a second Princess?"
Both Spike and I looked at each other, unsure, before turning back to her. "I don't know what to expect, but I suppose only Princess Celestia can answer that."
"Great, we should tell her now!" said Twilight excitedly.
I rolled my eyes, knowing full well what would happen if she sent that letter to Princess Celestia. "Come on, Twilight, why you have to rush things?" I levitate a purple gift boxes, "Besides, we got invitation for Moon Dancer's birthday!"
"Yeah, I'll pass," Twilight said rather quickly.
"Aww, come on Twilight, just this once," Spike pleaded with puppy eyes.
Twilight looked at me hesitantly, with a reassuring smile from me, she relented. "Fine, I guess I'll have to pick up for her on the way."
"Great!" Spike and I chanted in unison.
"Happy birthday, Moon Dancer!"
Our old classmates, Twinkle Shine, Minuette, Lemon Hearts, and Lyra Heartstrings, all was here to congratulate her on this little party. We gave her our gifts, and then we all proceeded on the punch. I didn't let Spike had too much of it else he'll go overboard, and drank all of it when we all move onto chatting.
My gifts for her was a chemistry set and a couple rare vials I bought from that zebrarican merchant that arrived on Canterlot a few weeks ago. I don't know what Spike has for her since he doesn't want to tell me. Twilight in the other hoof, bought her a book. It was typical of her, really, last time Shining Armor, our brother, got a book on Guard's Can't gestures.
While I don't actively partake in the girls doing gossips and the likes, it was nice to talk from time to time. I tried to get Twilight out of that habit of hers, but that doesn't turn out so well. And why did I suggest her to date Blueblood all those years ago is beyond me.
And Spike decides to try to sneak up to get one of the punch, but my glare stopped him from doing so. Twilight mostly stayed out and decided that reading is a better activity than socializing, oh well, can't blame her.
After a while, the three of us bid farewell to the girls and departed home. As soon as we arrived home, she quickly get Spike to write a message to Princess Celestia.
Dear Princess Celestia,
It has come to my attention of a prophecy, if not handled carefully, may result in the extinction of ponydom as a whole.The Prophecy in question is about the Mare in the Moon, an ancient old tale dating back at least eight centuries ago. The legend has it said that she would escape with the aid of the stars. If my calculations are correct, then I believed she would break free during the Summer Sun Celebration.
We must act immediately to ensure that the Mare in the Moon, also known by the name of Nightmare Moon, cannot succeed on her plans to bring forth eternal night.
I shall wait for your response, Princess.Your faithful student,
Twilight Sparkle.
"Twi-light Spark-le, there done!" Spike exclaims.
"Great," a yawn escaped Twilight's mouth. "Send it, Spike."
Spike nodded and blew off the scroll with his fire breath. According to Princess Celestia, Spike is one of the rare breeds of Dragons, the one who had magical capabilities unfounded on any kind of dragon. She did not disclose the fact that, perhaps, by a miracle, Spike would be able to control his flames to any elements dragons had. Electricity, Ice, Venom, Fire, or even the good old fireball.
We Equestrian, unfortunately, don't know much about dragons, their cultures, and whatnot.
She mentioned that Spike's breed descended from an ancient black Dragon who once wield the Black Greatsword Vutha Marfadelom, whatever that means.
Unfortunately, Princess Celestia didn't respond as usual. I would assume that she put the letter away because of court or some type of meetings that requires her attention. It's not a surprise, honestly. She always redirect any message from Spike to her room if she was busy enough.
"Hey, Twilight, want to grind XP for Ogres and Oubliettes?" I asked her.
She shrugged, "Sure, why not, it has been a while since we last played."
"And I, Spike, shall be the game master of you two Adventurers," Spike said exaggeratedly, finishing with a comical Prench laugh.
I really liked the first. yours is looking good too. we’ll i still have hope for the original I look forward to this story as well.
I am glad someone is continuing this story. Although I am mostly liking this the one problem I have that bothers me is that she confessed to the sparkles about originally being human. I don’t know why but it bothers me.
Really happy to see that you've picked up this amazing story/universe.
ah.. someone got tired of waiting i see... lol good luck.
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At first, I wonder if I should mention about her humanity or not and I decide to put it now. I mean, she no longer remember her name or her past life for that matter. I think she would've tell the others about her origin so Twilight could remind her of who she was once, a momento. Although that will not be referred nor mention again in the story because of reasons...
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Thanks, we all know how long it is. And just as any video-game hero ever,
"If no one would do it, then I'll do it."
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that's my thought on 'angelic layer' we have the rudimentary tech for it, but nobody is combining them far as i know. looking forward to see how you write this
I did a little advertising on the original to bring the old fans of this story to this one.
edit: Just in chase something doesn't sound like it's intended, nothing is supposed to sound mean.
I do those kind of comments at least once in the beginning of a story or when I think I notice that something goes into a similar direction like I have seen it a hundred times already or when I feel like it does the same thing like stories did that I disliked. in the end.
Not really a big shock, but my normal reaction would be "NOOOOO", they know she is a human.
The description of her past was not bad, only here I thought that I hoped her power would be unique enough to give Twilight problems should she decite to compete with her somehow.
I guess I wanted to see her as someone that goes a bit against Twilight being the chosen one.
edit: For some reason I just thought I hope that she is at least stronger than Applejac and Rainbow Dash, not sure what to think about Pinkie as long as Twivine is able to stop her from annoying her if she doesn't want it it should be fine.
I can't help myself and image what can go wrong even if I'm happy to see this.
I really don't need an OP character, but I like it if there is someone who can rival someone like Celestia and Twiligt or....suddenly forgot the second reason, but maybe it goes in the direction that the main char human or not acts somewhat useless in those stories.
Don't take me to seriously, but since fimfiction is only about on series I got used to dislike certain.....ideas (not sure if that is the right word for what I want to say here but I can't think of something better this morning).
Thank you very much for continue this story anyway. Of course because of the timeskip "which I usually don't like", there were a few things I could comment about but these were all not big things soooo good job
My wish for the story would be since they start where the seasons start, maybe do some little things different than in the show like maybe Twivine befriending Trixie or at least supporting her and commenting on how badly the others tread her when they run her out of town.
I guess she could be the last Pony Trixie sees and while she would probably still leave and come back later to enslave everyone beside Twivine, it would probably bring some nice changes.
Also I hope while she doesn't train so much with Twilight, her powers allow her to actually join a VIllains fight and maybe she is better because of being creative with her powers? I just want the others to aknowledge what she does.
I remember stories in which the human had some kind of power or the main char was helping in such situations, but the only thing that happend was, "the other characters ignoring what the main char did or even talking in a way that makes it look bad or like it was nothing special.
For now I don't need romance in the story, but I try to image if a weird little crush as a funny element to the story would look good.
That and I just finally want a shy and clumsy colt having a crush on the main char (maybe for defending him) instead of the usual personalities we get.
I don't need any of that teasing the main char stuff well maybe from her sister and two close friends if it's in friendly humor and not overdone.
That and while it happens more often lately, I hardly see the other char blushing while it's usually the main char who is nervous and a blushing mess.
Sorry that it is so big but I guess I got suddenly a bit excited by everything that could happen now that this is back and honestly I was just looking for a Twivine story again.
it's here i'm a little sad because of time skip (we lose all the cute filly twilight and twivine shenanigans) regardless can't wait to see where the author will take this story, best of luck
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Yeeaah, as much as I would like to see of how the two adorkable fillies growing up, but its not going to happen unless the original author somehow came back from the grave, until then, no filly Twilight and Twivine unfortunately
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YES YES YES! HAHAHA, FINALLY A REAL FEEDBACK! YUUUHUUUUUU *Maniacal Laughter*
*Clears Throat*
First of all, thank you for this AMAZING feedback, for a new writer such as myself that started writing about six-seven months ago. I really need an honest say about my story and seeing this made my day, I just got back home from school and logged on to see your comment. For that, I truly appreciate it. Let me do another backflip of joy
That aside, let us jump on the commentary!
I actually never intended that much big of a reveal, both Twilight and Twivine's Parent (Nightlight and Velvet) are already seeing some weird stuff back then. I suspect that both would just go for "Eh, cool." kind of reaction and brush it off aside as it was another day in the Sparkle household. Y'know, they already seeing crazier stuff ever since Twilight 'give birth' to both of Spike and Twivine, so that is to be expected. About the Princess however, I would say that she's like a mother (as usual) listening to their children's wild story, and again just like before, Celestia already seen some weirder stuff in the past so this one is probably one of them. Of course, Celestia wouldn't immediately brush that aside easily, she would like to think about it. Thats all I can say in the matter.
Ohohohoho, Twivine wouldn't be the usual "I don't give a shit" attitude, she'll probably more along the line of "I'm tired with this crap" kind of stuff. Twivine isn't weak, recalling back in the story that Twivine beat up a group of bullies and manage to broke one of the bullies ribs resulting of her being feared by the whole class (and also getting some detention plus lecture from the teacher). That one alone hinted that she already is strong in some way. She would be more similar to Shining Armor, protective about its siblings and will do anything to protect them. I would say that Twivine would be able to compete with Twilight and in fact become stronger than her if she wishes to be. Alas, she don't want to...
Because of reasons...
Same, I also disliked Overly Overpowered character that makes them a Mary Sue/Gary Stu. Again as I mentioned earlier, Twivine could in fact be stronger or equal of the two. OP character that I can tolerate is a character that had an actual purpose in the story rather than them being in the center of that story. It'll make a really good story if they did had a purpose
About the rest of the stuff...
I don't intend for Twivine at the center and watch things going on around her, because this is an AU and my interpretation of the story, things will change with her around I assure you
And also, about the romance stuff, I actually got one for the next chapter and I assure you, it won't be much nor would it be Twilight/Twivine on crushing on somepony, but the opposite. Again I assure you, things will be different unlike the other mess of a Fiction.
Welp, I guess that's all I can say in the matter. Thanks a lot for commenting
-Desperate out
Maybe its a bit early in yore act of the story, but I feel like you should focus a bit more of her odd magic an why the oter are afraid of these magic. The only thing that makes her stand out is that she can summon and control plundervines. In the original i hat the feeling that her magic thends to act more agressive then normal magic should.
But that's just my opinnion. Keep on going.
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edit: I'm happy that I can help you with my comments, it's always nice to see if someone likes it.
I guess if we have more to talk about we should use the PM's right? If you want it and if I should have more to say I tell you about it in a PM.
For now that is enough for me, I just like to know how you imaged the characters reacting or thinking about the matter.
I guess I only hoped for it to stay a secret because that would lead to one or another complication or them wondering how she is so different than them if you know what I mean.
It's at least a fact that this mysterious element of a story get's often solved right in the second or third chapter in other stories when a human is turned into something else as an example. I like it if they have to figure it out or whatever situations comes from them not knowing it.
Like I said it's not a big thing here, especially if they don't make a big thing out of it all the time when they meet someone. I guess what I mean is the introducion should maybe not be "Hi I'm Twivine a former human".
Goood to hear, good to hear,
I didn't wanted the main char to be useless or anticlimactic weak, getting manipulated or pushed around by others.
You know the main characters who don't give a #### and aren't interessted in making friends with someone? They shouldn't be able to change their personality so fast, but only give Twilight and her gang one or two chapters and you have a flower sniffing new cuddle buddy if you know what I mean.
I think I can agree with that too.
Not sure if that counts as this or not, but there where several stories with Celestia and Luna being control freaks or ridiculous powerfull and I disliked that.
I mean I admit I get tired of something like that if it's always happens like that. I don't know if it#s a comic thing or how much is just imagination from readers and authors on this side here, but I just like to see them being vulnerable too instead of droping an energyball as big as a planet on their enemies or using the moon or sun to create devastating elemental attacks.
I guess if someone is not to invisible they are also more likeable. Baaah now that makes me think of those Displaced characters who accidently act like pro ass####.
I have a headache so please excuse me if something makes no sense and ask again if you want to know what I meant.
I don't intend for Twivine at the center and watch things going on around her, because this is an AU and my interpretation of the story, things will change with her around I assure you
------ very good, in some stories you get the same stuff as in the episode and two aditional sentences from the main char to prove he exists
Oh I can't wait to see what you have planned, I would still hope for an unusual quiet someone who falls in love with her but I'm sure I simply trust you for now, it sounds good what you say.
Tracking until you make it readable.
I suggest getting some poor sap to edit for you, plenty of late teenagers willing to edit on this site for some reason, just use a big brown bag and nab one or two.
There are several places that were mistyped or misspelled... If possible, I would like to be the proofreader for you. I enjoy reading, and errors jar my experience like a speed bump on a highway. I attempted to copy the majority of them, but my phone, the style I'm on the most, acted up and only kept the most recent.
It is always good to see when a story gets a new chance at life. Thank you very much for doing this and sharing it with us.
Hmm... Actually, by living with her it make absolutely no sense for Twi to remain as socially inept as in the show, yet somehow she still is. Vi could have reminded her about that birthday as well. Twi might have forgot about it due to being focused at researching this legend, but that could pop up in their morning conversation.
Also, I really hope Vi haven't actually forgot the show by this point and just acting. That's not something you'd like to forget when you end up living it.
"I opened my eyes to see the same exact ceiling for the past couple of years under the Princess teaching." Holy mother of god thats a rough sentance. This does not bode well for this story.
*update Oof, I couldnt take more then a few paragraphs of that. This story needs alot of editing.
What do my eyes see? Take my thanks for continuing this you beautiful Organism. Here have a cookie.🍪
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About Twivines strength.
I personally don't know much about original story of her creation but from my understanding she was big bad of some kind. Even disrecarding that, considering in canon Discord created plundervines for the sole purpose of draining tree of harmony AND taking out the sisters. From that reason alone I see her always trumping both royal alicorns. On the other hand that would also make her nearly helpless against the lord of chaos himself. How effetive her vines would be against anyone else is up to interpretation.
This is just how I see her main ability with the vines. Any normal unicorn power she has isn't considered here.
I know this is late considering there are chapters out but it will bother me if they arent as effective on alicorns as canon makes them look like plundervines are specialized against alicorns. Makes me wonder though if Twivine gets power up from everfree forest considering:
1. its natural untamable magic .
2. that is where plunder seeds were either plainted or went after spouting.
You could even use these two factors to justify ascending her if you ever feel like that should happen.
Hmm. When did he stop chewing on tails of others?
So, I remember from the old story that Twivine has knowledge of the show, even up to the royal wedding. I would like to know if this story continues with Twivine having the same knowledge. I'm only asking because I don't know if Twivine doesn't know if Nightmare Moon is real or is just trying to calm Twilight down.
So, what's the point of her being a human or from Earth, if knowledge of humans and Earth was wiped from her brain (and she didn't bother to write it down)?
Hehe, sometimes it seems like you a word. Assuming not first language?
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This I agree, but it has potential to be a great story nonetheless.
Says the pony who was born through magic that not even a 1000+ year old Demigod had never heard of.
Well, it's certainly doesn't seem to be going in the same direction the original did... Also, the writing could use a good editor or two, because some parts are so bad, they're hilarious. For instance, I wasn't aware she only had one tooth at this point - what happened?! :D
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And was a brony who knows the show up till starlight glimer and proclaimed that she would support twilight in everything she does, especialy Nightmare Moon. The skepticism here really kills this character.
Chapter 0. Temproary plothole patcher.