• Member Since 17th Mar, 2015
  • offline last seen September 3rd

CoffeeMinion


"Burninating the countryside... burninating the peasants... burninating all the peoples... and their thatched-roof COTTAGES! THATCHED-ROOF COTTAGES!! And the Trogdor comes in the NIIIIGHT!!!"

T

Tirek’s destruction of Golden Oaks Library left Twilight Sparkle borderline uninsurable. Now only the greatest financial advisor in the land can save her... but at what cost?


Sex tag for tax implications.

A story request for Super Trampoline. Cover art assembled from here and here. "At what cost" gag purloined from Aragon. Featured on FimFiction 18Feb.2019-19Feb.2019! :heart:

Chapters (1)
Comments ( 26 )

Oh... that chapter tittie... title! I meant title!

PresentPerfect
Author Interviewer

Aragon what have you done

"...made Standard Deduction’s imagination catch fire with visions of taking a long walk on the beach before a long, sweaty, passionate night of preparing their quarterly taxes together—and filing jointly."

Oh, yes. Twilight's OTP.

Please do continue. I have got to see more of this!

Only an idiot wouldn't insure an princess. It's actually kinda a bragging point for an insurance company to say that they have royal clientele...

Celestia-damned taxes.

I’ve had my share of tax and insurance woes, so I totally sympathize with Twilight here. Damn paper-pushers!

I love everything about this story, from the cover art to the tale itself. But it was too short! We need MOAR!

oh baby, you fill out that 71;094-C form, check everyone of those deductions that apply, show that form who's your dependents and sign...on...the...dotted line baaaaby

So funny, like most of your stories. :rainbowlaugh:
What's next, something tragic to maintain balance? :fluttershysad:
Definitely have a thumbs up!

9465427
Only two things can be predicted: death and taxes

9466026
Death: Inevitable, yet unexpected.

I love your solution to Twilight Sparkle's insurance woes! Although, I personally would have just suggested that she contact Celestia to arrange for a trust fund to self-insure herself.

9466139
Taxes: Inevetiable, but predicatable

I expected this to be a parody of Geico commercials. Instead, I got accounting-based sex jokes.

This is a good thing. A very good thing.

I'm torn, this was a great story on it's own, but I SO want to see more of Standard Deduction and Twilight together.

That akward moment when others are talking about sex jokes and you are too dense to see them.
Nice short story though.

9465378
Insurance companies exist to deny claims
Adjuster to 3 Little Pigs
"Yes, you're covered for huffing AND puffing, but what you have here is mostly spittle damage -not covered"

9467620
They do however have clients they will bend over backwards to keep due to celebrity status so they can be used to attract normal customers they can milk for every dime they are worth

9465199
<cue I’m Spartacus jokes but it’s Aragon> :rainbowwild:

9465312
I still snerk every time I reread the “filing jointly” bit. Talk about awfully specific innuendo!

9465370
Never say never, my friend—but I’ve got a fair few outstanding requests that I need to plow through. And that’s just from having them open for like... half a day over the weekend?

9465378
I’ve no doubt that it’s a mark of pride, but a bottom line is a bottom line.

...I’m sure that Standard Deduction would inject a double meaning there. :derpytongue2:

9465427
Don’t let Standard hear that noise, lad—‘e’s liable to flip is desk, shout “U WOT MATE,” an’ arve a go at ye!

9465460
I’m glad that people have enjoyed this! Always leave ‘em wanting more. :rainbowkiss:

9465771
Whoa whoa whoa, this is a Teen-rated fic, sir. You’ll have to take that kind of explicit stuff elsewhere. :trollestia:

9465800
A fantastic question, balance is. I’m not really at a point where I’m worried about balance right now. TBH I’m loving the request pile that came in over the weekend. Where it goes from there, I haven’t the foggiest!

9466026
9466139
Death and taxes: like the Spanish Inquisition.

9466627
We love to exceed our clients’ expectations here at Financial Pro Plus! :pinkiehappy:

9466820
Keep that torch burning—you never know!

9466834
Honestly man, don’t worry about it. If the story works on multiple levels, that’s hardly a bad thing! And really, most of the “sex joke” content stems from Standard getting excessively excited about Twilight (and taxes) (but probably mainly taxes).

9467620
“What?! I could’ve sworn I added the spittle rider last time we renewed!”

PresentPerfect
Author Interviewer

Delightful madness here as before. I can't help but imagine flirtation by audit in the couple's future. "Claiming your goldfish as a dependent? You've been a very naughty colt, Mr. Deduction..."

Meanwhile, Rainbow Dash and Rarity are both disgusted by this eggheaded mockery of romance.

In all seriousness, thank you and Trampoline for a wonderful bit of madness.

This was hilarious, I loved it and I barely understand a thing about taxes and insurance. XD

Probably won’t be too bad a tax. Likely Twi will let ponies claim books as dependents.

“Hm? Oh, she’s already out in the waiting room. Gross Dividend was supposed to be helping with walk-ins today, but he took one look at her file and ‘called’ in sick right to my face.”

Still better than Amortization. Poor Morty merely spied Twilight walking in the direction of the front door, and he turned to his boss and called in dead.

Making insurance funny is a great skill indeed. Have a like.

Fucking stallions, I swear.

I've reviewed your story HERE!

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