Drabble Kaboom!

by Alex Warlorn

Tomboy Rarity and Tomboy Rainbow Dash 1 dollar commission

"This is it Rarity! You're the last one!" Gloated a dark blue Alicorn pegasus with shark teeth and a wild rainbow mane. "This is gonna be the end! No more girlie girl junk! No more 'how do you do?' No more tea parties! No more pink! No more frilly dresses! Under my totally awesome guidance, ponykind is gonna gonna be the most totally radical species around!"

Rarity stood defiantly, her head held high, keeping her poise to the bitter end. "If you're going to do it Rainbow Dash, then get on with it, but do not waste a lady's time!"

"Hey! Watch it! It's Nightmare Awesomeness now! I've even got it on all my merch' now!"

"Well darling, I'd say you're the same as you've always been," Rarity said firmly.

"Except,now I've got these super cool laser eyes that makes everybody as awesome as me!"

Rainbow Dash, I mean Nightmare Awesomeness gestured around her. They were on top of Rarity's boutique, the last bastion of feminism in a sea of tomboy-hood! There was Pinkie Pie dressed up a 'pony gangsta' rapping to a swaying crowd with was Octavia playing hard punk rock with a moewhawk mane cut. Twilight Sparkle was throwing out all her boring 'classics' to make room for comic books and action packed penny novellas. Fluttershy was doing an hip 80s exercise routine with her animals in trendy leg warmers. Spike burned his pink frilly apron. Applejack... was pretty much the same.

As a silver lining, Scootaloo had been made Rainbow Dash, er, Nightmare Awesomeness' knight and could fly now.

Rarity still wore the fire ruby necklace that Spike had given her, she touched it firmly.

"I gotta admit Rarity, I saved the best for last. You're gonna be the cherry on top! Turning YOU into a tomboy is gonna be the best!"

"Are you going to do it? Or are you going to talk to me to death first?" Rarity said simply. "I would give my everything for Equestria, my love, my life, myself, what shall you give Rainbow Dash?"

"Oh you're asking for it! Here we go!" She fired her eye lasers, that changed direction in mid-air at sharp angles to hit Rarity dead center. But when it did... Rarity's fire ruby necklace glowed... and then... red light was pulled from every pony and creature present, including Nightmare Awesomeness, pulling into Rarity... she began to glow as a single red outline, the rest of Equestria darkening as the combined coolness, radicalness and awesomeness was absorbed into her.

Then the explosion of pink swept over everything, and there was a blinding white light. As the light died down, Rainbow Dash looked over herself, and found that, indeed, she was no longer Nightmare Awesomeness, she was back to normal levels of totally awesomeness, coolness, and radicalness Rainbow Dash.

Then in midair Rainbow Dash looked around Ponyville... and screamed.

There was Octavia, playing classical on her cello... with Vinyl playing fiddle next to her. Pinkie Pie with her mane done, selling little carefully designed and beautifully made miniature cupcakes.

Twilight was dressed up in a pretty dress, reading a mystery-romance novel, with Spike taking notes, signing them as 'Lord Master Kenbroath Gilspotten Heathspike The Forth.'

To the music of Swan Lake, Fluttershy was leading her animals in a graceful ballet practice. Applejack was sewing the most beautiful of dresses outside Rarity's shop.

And Scootaloo was now wearing a pink ballerina outfit and was dancing in the clouds. She happily waved at Rainbow Dash.

"Noooooo!" Rainbow Dash wailed.

"Like! Dude! Don't worry! Ya ain't alone! Ya still got like the most totally hip pony there is as yer best buddy!"

Rainbow Dash turned back to see Rarity as the most tomboy as tomboy could be unicorn imaginable. With visible muscles, wearing a baseball cap, with torn jeans and shirt. Her hair obviously unkept. Smelling like she hadn't taken a shower in a while. With scars long her body with a couple bandaids. A flaming skull dragon tattoo on her left foreleg. And wearing a spiked collar.

Overwhelmed, Rainbow began to slowly land on the store's roof.

Rarity hugged Rainbow like a vice. "Dude! We're in it together! Two tomboys against the whole wide world! But we're gonna keep it together right bud? No stupid frilly dresses for us! We're totally awesome! Not like then pink fru-frus! ain't that right buddy?"

Rainbow Dash could just dimly nod. She was gonna have to change the name on all her merchandise again.

~Fin

Comments

[howard035]

Sounds like the day was saved by Plainity.

[Alex Warlorn]

9827484
Ironically I'd stopped watching the show mostly by that point.

[FanOfMostEverything]

Who knew Evil Pie-Hating Rainbow Dash was capable of such things? Thank goodness her ire is usually reserved for desserts.

[Alex Warlorn]

9827713
thanks for comment