I hope you enjoy your ending.

Much better.

I really like this one.

9381510
If you must know I did this because some people were accepting of all the shit I gave Celestia while others weren't so I decided to split the paths give both sides an ending they would like a compromise if you will.

9381553 Ah, okay.

Sounds like a good compromise to me.

9381564
The reason I ended the story here was so that I didn't reach the point where the story was impossible to build a complete ending, it's why my Changeling Queen story for Pinkie Pie was cancelled due to too many subplots. I learned a vital lesson there.

9381573 Good plan, that.

Cool.

Before I say anything else I want to put it out that I think this was a good story. The premise was excellent and many of the ideas were original in some aspect.

With all that said, this story fell into a flaw I know all to well, it was rushed. There were many times when it felt line I was reading the cliff notes of a story rather than a story and there were parts that should of been flushed out more, there was little to no world building and while there was characture development there wasn't much. The chapters were short and limited, the writing was clunky.

If this story was more flushed out I think you would have the makings of something this site hasn't seen since it's golden years. Over all I'll have to say that this story was well done but the chapters should be expanded upon and given more life. You have an amazing base but you need to build off of it.

If you are interested in improving the story and need help I'll PM you an example of what I'm talking about.

9381588
I rushed the ending a bit I must admit but that's because I wanted it to end in a somewhat clean manner as opposed to having fifty subplots that went nowhere, read this story I wrote and you'll see what I mean https://www.fimfiction.net/story/385381/queen-of-parties and why I cancelled it

Nice ... i like how theres two epiloges ... pick your flavor. It's too bad she never met statures parents i think they'd like the fact she had a statue built of their son.

While I enjoyed most of the story I felt the end kind of went off the rails. Most of the story had a fairly good cause and effect going on, if this happend it would make sense this would change, and while there were a few outliers with Sunset and the like it fit together well with the picture you painted. Everything after Cloudy just kind of came out of nowhere, especially if Celestia fell apart so easily due to her subjects losing faith in her. I can think of few things that would destabilize views of a ruler more than literally dozens of unsolved murders and the knowledge that any who look into it are killed. People would accuse those at the top of turning a blind eye to the worst sort of barbarism, especially if the dead literally ended up falling in droves into the streets.

9381860
That’s the kind of thing that would stand out most in a mostly peaceful society, as well the three tribes were depicted as being completely at odds with each other until the windigos brought them together. The unicorns would have likely dissolved the alliance if their leaders were mysteriously killed anytime within the lifetime of those who had participated in such bigotry.

I choose Elysian Field's as I think that any one who can make the choice to sacrifice themselves for the betterment of others should have any Sins they may have had in the past Erased, She loved Equestria and Her little ponies to the end and for that THIS Celestia has my forgiveness and Respect.

9381553

Do you plan on doing anything more in this timeline? I wouldn't mind seeing more!

9381912
No but anyone is free to as long as they connect it to this story.

nice work liked the end2

9381923

Got an Idea for a new Story?

9382277
If you have an idea write it, I am glad that you are inspired and that goes for everyone else who reads this as well.

Double ! :)

Good job on the story😃 I love it!

Ok, I’m now a few thousand words in and feel I’ve got an idea of the writing in this fic. I will say the story, so far, seems pretty decent, if rushed. Honestly, it comes across more as an out line than an actual story. Hell, I might just use it as one some day. I do take issue with a few things that just come across as silly, like the bipedal ponies and unrealistic use of language. If you want to do anthro, do anthro; half measures just come across as janky and off putting. If not, plenty of stories exhibit how ponies can use weaponry without the need of arms.

Saying that, I still intend to finish this fic. Like I say the overarching story isn’t so bad so far, merely kind of flat.

9418385
Ultimately a quadrepedal form is inefficient for any kind of fighting in comparison to a bipedal one, magic helps but lacks the intuition muscle meory brings. Consider this a more Earth Pony style of fighting, how can Earth Ponyfight a minotaur or a Girrffon or dragon that actual can have claws and fight in a similar manner to a bipedal.

9418634
Cavalry.

The horse has always done the greater share of the work the make cavalry effective. Just strap a lance to your side and charge. Now, when it comes to dueling/close combat, I would point to the Upheaval stories as a good example.
Would that example be as effective as a bipedal duelist? No, but we can use that to make the story more interesting. Given their natural limitations, how do ponies survive in a world of bipeds? Answering this question could as simple as “earth-pony strength, pegasus flight, and unicorn magic” or we could go into an in-depth view of the mechanical intricacies of specially designed weaponry suitable for use with mouth, wing, and/or horn.

9419412
Yes but this is a style for Earth Ponies that use swords. A sword is designed for a fingers or claws in this case so for a Earth Pony or heck a Pegasi to use swords they wiould need an upright gait. Pegasi are more spear users.

9419423
brilliant story

No zoophilia trash.

Can there be a second book

U should throw a human into the mix see how it gos and kill him if it goes bad. R.I.P celestia. U died like a G though

i chose Epilogue 2: Elysian Field

Sequel please.

9498056
Look I may make an altenate universe where Celestia didn't die and had adventures in Ponyville but not for a while yet.

9498634
cool

9501079
He was still in control of himself during the rehearsal.

9501662
Well not exactly he was still very clearly under Chyrsaliss influence she had been messing with mind since before they even arrived in Canterlot.

9502185
AFAIK she was just using "migraine spells" on him prior to the rehearsal. She definitely used mind control on him during the wedding though.

9506352
Do you really believe anything she said at that time, she was definetly lying about everything.

9506731
Of course she did.

9506352
And even if he was in control of himself. What he said was still fair.

Shining Armor and Celestia had at least the beginnings of a reason choose Cadence (or Chrysalis as it were) over Twilight, since they have split loyalties between Twilight (sister or student) and Cadence (fiance or family).

Celestia is less forgivable, since she should have been looking for security threats, Canterlot had a shield up for goodness' sake, and was aware of the existence of changelings afaik. She has a duty to her kingdom that stands higher than her duty to Cadence.

But Shining Armor has to choose to resolve a conflict between what is supposed to become the most important person in his life, Cadence, and his sister. Uninviting her from the wedding and dealing with the conflict afterwards is reasonable.

9538704
So he decided that a mare he had known for some time was more important than his own sister. Besides, family comes first. When they're concerned about something, you LISTEN to them. A simple misunderstanding is no reason to disown a member of your family.

9691405
Ah. Ok. That would be fucked up in mlp.

Interesting I feel more absent minded once I finished this.

10187279
?

10204971
One Punch Man did pretty much make itself the new example of overkill.

10478987
Drunk or not, mind controlled or not, you always put family ahead of anything else(otherwise its just shitty writing on the studios part and stupidity on Chrysalis s part). And what did Shining do? Justified or not, he put his soon-to-be wife ahead of his sister. But besides all of that, we can all agree that all this hatred(whether against Twilight, or the Infamous 7) is because of the writers and their shitty writing.

9862832
Well we can always use another girl on our side. But be warned, we girls have a higher chance of being kidnapped by Traffickers to be sold as sex dolls to perverted 40 year olds.

10635864
Like a certain President of USA that got impeached twice and will get what's coming to him.

I honestly went with the Elysian Fields route because I feel Celestia did redeem herself, maybe even before her sacrifice. Plus, “just because someone stumbles and loses their way, it doesn’t mean they’re lost forever.” -Uncle Iroh from Avatar the Last Airbender

10765936
Two years and some wisening up has taught me enough that this makes sense.

10612098
From Sonic Lost World.

Love it, now to read epilogue 1 for multiple reasons.

1. because I'm curious.
2. I can't complete a story without reading all the chapters.
3. Why the hell not.

So my thoughts on this story? I love it, although I do wish there were more chapters expressing how powerful Twilight is by some immortal god coming to destroy the universe or something.

The story is amazing, (Story spoilers) Immortal X Immortal, an overpowered Twilight, Queen Twilight ruling over an entire empire, advancing technology to make the world better, this is basically a Happy ending, it would have been more so if Celestia didn't die.