Breakfast, Deportation, and Surprise Parties
Chapter 22
“May I have more syrup?” Scott asked Twilight while he dug into his pancakes. “And some chocolate chips and some butter.” The unicorn levitated some from a basket she had with her. She brought enough to sate even Pinkie Pie’s sweet tooth. “Yeah, that’s not going to be enough.”
Ancro looked at Twilight and flatly said, “What Scott means to ask is if you have a spell that will put him into a diabetic coma.” Ancro took note that the ponies apparently had diabetes, otherwise he wouldn’t have been able to say that. An image of the old guy from the diabetes commercials all ponified popped into his mind.
“I’m sorry, no. I don’t know of any spells like that,” Twilight answered with a slight chuckle. Then she observed Ancro shuffle back and forth between Scott and Stigandr for a few moments. “What are you doing?”
“Trying to find a happy medium,” Ancro answered inching towards Stigandr, “It’s the only way I can taste anything other than emotions.”
“Interesting, I didn’t know changelings didn’t have a sense of taste like that,” Twilight said, “It makes sense, though, eating isn’t truly a necessity for your species.”
“Yeah, but nothing beats the taste of fresh pancakes.” Ancro replied craning his neck ever so slightly. It felt like he was trying to get cell reception in a dead zone. Finally finding a spot where it wasn’t too sweet or not sweet enough. “The problem is I have to balance between diabetic coma over there,” he gestured to Scott, “and everything’s too sweet over here.” He gestured to the unicorn who was now softly laughing between bites.
“So Twilight, I assume that these gentlestallions are going to be our chaperones as we roam the palace?” Stigandr asked when he finished his breakfast.
“Yes, they are going to escort you at all times while you all are out of your cell,” Twilight said. “Also could you all hurry up? The princesses would like to meet with all three of you.”
“Y’know I just realized that I didn’t get interviewed.” Scott said pointedly. He felt Ancro’s holed hoof upon his shoulder. Twilight tried to think of something to say to the griffin but Ancro beat her to it with a smart remark.
“Scott, in all likelihood there’s a reason for that. And if you look deep inside of you, I’m sure you’ll find it,” Ancro answered in a tone unmistakable for anything but sarcasm.
Scott responded by laughing at the joke made at his expense extremely loudly, causing Ancro to flinch back and consciously press his ears against his head to try to lessen the noise.
“Alright are we ready to go?” Stigandr asked Twilight.
Twilight nodded then asked, “What about them?”
“What about them?” Stigandr asked. “They’ll be fine, that’s what the guards are here for. Then they can catch up when they’re done goofing off.”
Twilight looked at the other two. Scott had stopped eating his pancakes. The griffin was standing wobbly, proving that he didn’t have the constitution of Pinkie Pie when it came to sweets. Ancro was doing his best to strike up a conversation with a guard. Stigandr seemed all too eager to get on with it.
“Alright, if you three are ready,” Twilight said, “I’ll lead you to the throne room.”
---
The maid was walking through the halls to her next destination. She was expecting it to be an uneventful day of spying as well as preparing for the praetorians. She was sure that they would contact her and give her a time for when not to be here. While being told that this was a surgical strike had been assuring, she still had no desire to be here and risk getting hit in the crossfire.
“Wow it’s great to see the sun again,” said the unmistakable voice of a changeling. She as well felt the presence of several others surrounding the ponies. “I’m thinking about getting a tan. Do you think I could pull it off?” The voice asked one of the presences. The spy felt a spike in agitation and looked around a corner to see what was going on. She couldn’t believe her eyes.
Walking down the hall was a unicorn, a griffin, and a changeling. The changeling and unicorn had rings around their horn. All three were escorted by the at least fifteen guards as well as the Element of Magic herself Twilight Sparkle.
For a moment she thought that all three of them were being taken to be executed or moved. That was until she realized if that were the case the guards would have an emotion other than irritation. Curiously she followed the group, being passed off as nothing more than a maid doing her job.
A job she had gotten quite good at. Her natural aptitude for noticing small details had actually catapulted her into a favorable spot amongst the palace staff. Originally she had been wary of being in the spotlight, not wanting to catch anypony’s attention, or their ire. Imagine her shock when instead of bitterness they had given her congratulations as well as a pay raise . At least to them she was a ‘friend’ as nice as the job was, it wouldn’t compare to breaking her façade and terrorizing her annoying coworkers.
After following for some time she realized where they were being taken. She was hesitant to go any closer to the throne room though. Both princesses were in there and she wasn’t competent enough in her blocks to be able to work without giving something away. The two alicorns behind those doors were terrifyingly powerful. In raw power one of them could easily outclass Chrysalis. Her victory had been a fluke and every changeling knew it.
---
Ancro hated himself. His need for one-upmanship against Stigandr had come around to bite him on the flank. He was standing an inch ahead of his friend and right on the precipice of his tolerance against the massive powers that stood in front of him. The worst part was that the pain was causing lapses in his concentration. So he couldn’t really understand what Luna was saying. Yet if he moved back he would feel like he was tying with Stigandr and he couldn’t have that. Was it petty? Yes. Was it stupid? Of course! Was he going to do the smart, rational thing and move back to avoid a colossal migraine? No. He was also a bit worried that if he budged an inch the guards would test out their spears on them. Apparently you make one off hoof comment about Blueblood being upper royalty and the guards emotions go from mild annoyance to a deep desire to harm the changeling that made the joke.
Celestia noticed Ancro’s distress from her seat across the throne room. It was slight twitches in his face, the eyes blinking more often, and other barely noticeable details. She wanted to ask him to step back. Yet a part of her wanted to see how far he would go. She still didn’t know why the changeling was intentionally harming himself. The unicorn with the pugil stick cutie mark, Stigandr if she was correct, stood calm and collected absorbing everything that was being said to him. Scott the griffin looked slightly terrified, especially as Luna got around to the punishments for breaking the extremely strict and sadly necessary rules.
Stigandr took keen note on every detail of every word Luna had said. If they broke these rules they would be imprisoned again. This time not in the cozy five star resort they had been having the pleasure of staying. She said in no uncertain terms that at the first sign of an attempt to escape or to endanger any of her ponies it wouldn’t end well. Stigs groaned internally, not sure if Ancro would try to press her buttons or if he should be more worried about Scott. Luna said she could have him deported and that was not something he wanted to happen to his friend. As far as the show had gotten with the griffins he knew nothing other than they were proud to the point of arrogance.
Scott was more than a bit terrified. If what Ancro and Stigandr had said about them to be true these were two ponies that you absolutely didn’t want to screw with when they were in a bad mood, like right now. He had the feeling that being chewed out by a pony R. Lee Ermy would be less terrifying. At least he had the courtesy to threaten you to your face. Luna was threatening him in all the subtle terrifying ways that he would expect a lawyer or a politician to throw at him. She also apparently could have him deported. He really hoped she didn’t send him to the moon. As great a team Stigandr and Ancro were, without him as the catalyst nothing would ever get accomplished. Seriously, without him neither of them would ever leave their house and they’d die of boredom or Minecraft. Besides, he really didn’t want to get sent to the moon.
Luna read her prepared speech to the Triumvirate that stood before her. While she recited she observed every movement they made to see if her speech was having its desired effect. Ancro was in obvious pain but out of either pride or defiance refused to step back or really show it. She doubted his friend’s had picked up on it because he was containing it so well. Stigandr seemed to be the model of a royal guard. When they had first captured him, Luna had sent out for the records of anypony named Stigandr with the matching description and cutie mark. So far nothing had turned up. While it was unusual for it to take so long she had expected it. Equestria had grown larger in her thousand year absence and she was still adjusting. If any of them were easy to read it was Scott and that was only because nervousness doesn’t suit a griffin. She had a feeling that if Scott wasn’t nervous about meeting royalty or possibly being deported then he wouldn’t betray a thing. The princess wouldn’t push the issue of who they work for or where they were from. Their willingness to help had made her believe one of her theories: that they were mercenaries. She still had no idea why somepony would be looking for a book on long nonexistent magic. Luna decided to focus on the crisis at hoof and find the changeling spies before looking for some mysterious book enthusiast.
“Does the Triumvirate have any questions?” She asked, finishing her speech. There was a hint of shock amongst the group. Very few people back on Earth had called them that.
“So to surmise,” Ancro started. Celestia recognized that was the smile he had before he said something smart-alecky. “We put a hoof or claw one inch out of line I go to deepest darkest pit, Stigandr gets twenty years, and Scott gets deported?”
“I doubt your friend’s punishment would be as severe as twenty years in prison.” She replied, “And yes Scott would be deported. It is part of our deal with the griffins if any of their kind cause too much trouble we may send them back by force for more severe punishment. I do not know if your friend told you this, Ancro, but griffin punishments are extremely severe for the subjects who embarrass their nation abroad. ”
“No, somehow it slipped his mind,” Ancro said and shot his increasingly terrified looking friend a glance to try to be somewhat comforting. He felt genuinely guilty about it. He was the one who noticed the small details and hadn’t realized that griffins, in all likelihood, had their own nation with their own laws.
---
“I’m so excited, sis,” Shift said as he caught up to her. They were unusually busy this morning. Most wrote it off to Spitfire having showed up yesterday. It had been great for business. “I actually have a date!”
“I know, you’ve told me and every changeling and customer.” Specs replied.
“Yeah, it’s just that,” Shift replied nervously kicking his hooves, “I’ve never had a date before.”
“Don’t be nervous little brother, you’ll do fine,” Specs reassured. “Just don’t screw anything up and you’ll get a great meal.”
“Hey guys!” One of their coworkers said, interrupting the siblings. “We are absolutely swamped. Septus had to run and get more potatoes for hash browns and we need you both out there.”
The siblings hurried back to work. Shift balancing trays on his metamorphosed wings, an impossible task without pegasi like dexterity, and Specs using her magic. Specs had nearly forgotten about her deal with her visitor last night. She had actually hoped it had all been a dream. He had said that she would be by in the morning and as the restaurant died down she hadn’t seen mane or hoof of the pony. Specs breathed a sigh of relief as she levitated the breakfast menu down, confident it was all a dream. Besides, it’s not like she could kill somepony who wasn’t here. The shadow wouldn’t punish the other deserters because the mare had failed to show up, right? The bell above the door ringed and somepony walked in.
“I’m sorry but are you all still serving breakfast?” The mare asked. The unicorn that walked in had a red coat and blue eyes that complimented her yellow mane.
The changeling was about to tell her ‘no’ when she caught a glimpse of her cutie mark. Specs glanced over and saw the microscope cutie mark. The changeling sighed, the least she could do was get the mare her last breakfast. She sat her in what she thought to be the most beautiful part of the restaurant. Then Specs began planning how to make this look like an accident.
---
Discord watched as Cadence slowly ate her breakfast. Well, not really eat. It was more along the lines of spread it around on your plate to make it look as such. It was the act of somepony who wanted everypony to think she was fine. She seriously could’ve used some lessons in lying because everything else gave it away.
He had been very careful to keep her and Shining Armor wallowing. Shining Armor hadn’t been that hard. His calling was to defend ponies and if he viewed himself as a threat to his own wife, the mare he loved and swore to protect. All he had to do was keep everypony busy with what they perceived to be the problem at hoof and ignoring the lovers quarrel.
The unnoticed shadow swirled out of Princess’s room and into the throne room. He needed to catch the last of the deal Luna was laying out for them to make sure there were not any changes that would alter his plan. As he heard her rattle it off the draconequus smiled. If you could count on Luna for one thing, it was a heavy hoofed response. He watched the Triumvirate’s expressions become more worried when she got to the punishment aspect of the deal.
He briefly considered going inside one of their heads and bothering them but decided against it. ‘Best not to push my luck’ though Discord. Given their predicament they may turn him in if he pushed the wrong buttons. No matter how necessary he may be for their return home. Having seen all he needed to see in the throne room he departed. He needed to help Shining Armor with his sulking.
---
Shining Armor walked through the Canterlot Sculpture gardens. He considered trying to get lost in the maze, maybe it would help him clear his mind and figure out what he was supposed to do. He knew he had to apologize but wasn’t sure how or even if he could. Now he learned that Ancro and his friends had agreed to aid his sister find the changelings. He knew Ancro didn’t work for Chrysalis or any changelings. He still didn’t trust them or know who they worked for. He trusted the princesses’ judgment.
Suddenly out of the corner of his eye he saw a black shape dart into the maze. Shining Armor followed the shape through the thick hedgerows. Erring on the side of caution he charged his horn, not sure what to expect. He took a deep breath and went around the corner and saw the black figure continue on through the maze.
Discord continued steering Shining Armor through the maze, keeping him away from any prying eyes. He needed him to be absolutely alone in order to do more damage to his already shaky mind and confidence. After several twists, turns, and double backs to make sure the unicorn would be good and lost, they reached their destination: a fountain. One of the several that occupied the maze, but Discord chose this one partly because of its location, partly because it was the largest, and partly because of the sentimental value it possessed, being where Shining Armor proposed to Cadence.
Shining Armor rummaged around in the garden avoiding the fountain at all costs. Whether it was conscious or subconscious Discord didn’t know or particularly care. What he did care about was giving the unicorn a deep feeling of self-loathing. He needed to keep Shining Armor wallowing long enough for the changelings to capture him and break him. He wished that he had more power, so he could drain the unicorn of his virtue. This whole setting the board, while fun, was monotonous.
---
“So, Twilight where do we begin?” Stigandr asked as they walked out of the throne room. Scott was still visibly shaken with the prospect of being deported. Stigandr was sure that wouldn’t happen if they just buckle down and helped out.
“Well, we’ll start with a tour of the palace. Then I’d like to get some more readings from you as you’re transformed. Then I’d like it if you all would help me construct a profile of the changeling.”
The maid couldn’t believe her ears. The changeling was going to help the ponies! That cowardly traitor, if the praetorians weren’t going to kill him at the end of the week than she would do it now, with much pleasure. At least she would if she knew she could get away with it. Fifteen guards surrounded him, and she valued her life far too much. Even if she was successful she wouldn’t dare take the joy from the praetorians. The lovely sadists would use her instead. The spy chose the wiser course of action deciding to watch and report. Who knows? Maybe it would propel the praetorians into acting sooner.
“Does a history lesson come with the tour?” Ancro asked, comically raising a hoof. Ancro was as sure as Stignadr. But he had to stop being a smart aleck, which was difficult because it was his coping mechanism. He felt like if he so much as said a single word to cross the princesses, it would be the end. The changeling had noticed Luna didn’t correct him on the deep dark pit part of the statement.
“Ancro,” Scott said putting his talon to his forehead, “we don’t really have time for it.” Ancro tasted that his friend was losing patience. Scott was fretting that if he goofed he’d be stuck in an even more unfamiliar land. He had no idea of griffin culture or what their punishment could be. He could conceivably end up in a gulag for all he knew.
The TV show didn’t give the palace its justice. It was far larger and unimaginably grander. Scott was rendered speechless with some of the architecture and the intricacies of the decorative stone and metal work. Occasionally the three friends would get a brief pause to stop and admire the work that must’ve been poured into this construction. You didn’t need to be an empath to tell that the ponies constructed the palace as a gift four . Somewhere between the first ballroom and the fifth hall of mirrors they came to the realization that this palace was built as a labor of love by the ponies for their princesses.
“Wow,” Ancro said out loud as they approached the fifth ballroom. “I never really knew how big this place is.”
“Yes, what you see on the outside is roughly a fourth of the palace.” Twilight said preparing to magic the doors open. “The rest is built into Canterlot Mountain.”
Scott was about to raise a talon and ask but then realized the answer to how it would still be so bright was right in front of him and may require a San check. Magic. That however didn’t explain why this ballroom was so dark. However Ancro could detect presences in there and informed their tour guide.
“There’s something in there,” Ancro spoke up looking into the darkness of the ballroom.
The guards immediately became more alert. Ancro hadn’t even noticed that they had started to slack off. Twilight lowered her head and lit up her horn. “Are you sure?”
“Yeah between three and four,” Ancro said, “I’d be able to tell more accurately if this ring wasn’t on my horn, and if they weren’t so clumped together.”
“I’m not removing it until you are not a threat.” Twilight replied flatly.
“Wasn’t asking you too,” Ancro responded.
“Hey if you’re done flirting with the pony,” Scott said sarcastically. Twilight felt the urge to vomit and as Ancro felt it as well, it stacked with his own. Ancro wanted to hit Scott…hard…with a brick. He was a brony but not that type of brony. “I think that’s a room that needs investigating.”
“Good idea,” Stigandr said, “Scott you’re on point.”
“Why am I on point?”
“Scott, who’s going to attack a big burly griffin?” Ancro replied, purposely trying to insult his friend. In actuality Scott hadn’t been particularly muscular since he had his hernia. Even then it had been an 1800’s boxer muscular not a bodybuilder or martial artist muscular.
“How about the guards take care of this,” Twilight said, inserting reason into their fun. As she spoke the five guards that had been guarding Ancro rushed past him and a purple bubble engulfed him. The remaining guards began eyeing Scott and Stigandr cautiously.
“Insurance?” Ancro asked experimentally tapping the bubble. Twilight nodded, “I have a feeling you don’t trust me.”
“You hit me and my sister-in-law in the horns to help a changeling escape.” Twilight replied, “I wonder whatever could’ve caused it.”
---
“Pinkie dear,” Rarity said, craning her neck to keep her horn from poking Fluttershy in the eye, “remind me why we are all in this cake?”
“So that we can surprise Stigandr and Scott and Ancro!” Pinkie replied.
“Ah still don’t know whah we had to be crammed in here so long,” Applejack said trying to keep Pinkie Pie’s tail out of her mouth. “Feels lahk we been in here fer hours.”
“Three hours fifty-six minutes and twenty-three seconds,” Pinkie Pie said, “and won’t it be worth the wait?”
“When did you even fahnd tahme to bake this cake?” Applejack asked. Finally asking a question she had been pondering for the past four hours.
“I always find time for cakes silly,” Pinkie Pie replied somehow patting the farm pony on her head.
“Pinkie Pie, I think I hear somepony coming.” Fluttershy whispered, and all inside the cake fell silent. They heard hoofsteps approaching the cake. Fluttershy started to speak again but Pinkie Pie cut her off.
“Jump out and yell surprise in three…two…one!” The top of the cake flung itself open and three of the four ponies jumped out. Five guards, shocked that three ponies had jumped out of a mysterious cake in a dark ballroom, immediately pointed their spears at Pinkie Pie, Rarity, and Applejack.
“Pinkie,” Rarity said staring nervously at the spear pointed directly in her face. “This wasn’t your best idea for a surprise party.”
“Oops,” Pinkie Pie said staring very uneasily at the sharp, pointy spear.
(Big thanks to my editors Tuv,Pon Katt, Tsujin Rilauco, Abyx4433. Also got a job after 6 months of unemployment I'm now making sandwiches at Subway, I'll find out tonight if they intend to keep me. Thanks to my artist Sara (shaya.laperro@gmail.com) for doing the cover art. Also thanks to my friends who don't mind me writing about them in this regard. As usual if you fav it like it and feedback is appreciated. If you don't feel comfortable sending me negative feedback through the comments just pm me. Thanks for reading!)
Stats
Page generated in 0.025 seconds
Total duration
824 users online
673,709 hits today, 2,561,572 yesterday
FIMFiction
My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
Designed and coded by knighty & Xaquseg - © 2011-2024
Follow & Support Us
Support us
SubStar
Chat!
Discord
Follow us
Twitter
MLP: Friendship is Magic® - © 2024 Hasbro Inc.®
Fimfiction is in no way affiliated with or endorsed by Hasbro Inc.®
Oh Pinkie... MOAR!
Now that's quite clever, point: Triumvirate.
why.... why is it that whenever i read the last sentence of a chapter i almost cry because i have to WAIT A F####ING MONTH
ah.... of course, it takes time to write, i applaud you good sir, good show.
And this is where spy would say 'I never really was on your side'.
imageshack.us/a/img33/5764/likethischapter.jpg
Looks like that army of editors is finally quelling all the errors. You're welcome btw.
2209185 Thank you Redbrony for posting and helping me find all these editors
Must... kill... evil changelings... and Discord.... kill him slowly... make him flesh... shove cacti up his ass... *Alondro does not go easy on those he decides are his enemies.*
2210687
Question 1: Why do we read a bunch of the same stories?
Question 2: SG-1 or atlantis?
Question 3: String theory or quantum mechanics?
Question 4: Why DID the chicken cross the road?
Question 5: Which of thes questions are irrelevant?
2210630 Tee hee! You're welcome!
2211144 Question 1: Because we can't be sure that they're always the same. We could be in another dimension.
Question 2: The movie was Origin.
Question 3: Quantum branes.
Question 4: Because it didn't want to look like a turkey.
Question 5: What is relevant but what we make so?
yes. good.
Not Pinkie's best idea.
Especially since everyone is kind of still on edge.
I wonder... will Pinkie Pie pull out string theory or Quantum physics in this story?
2256369 And the writer of this post would like to remind you that he is, in fact, a brilliant scientist and can come up with several feasible ways of actually making the world burn. Among other apocalyptic methods.
Science is scary once you understand everything you can do with it.
2257292 Can science get me to Equestria?
2257811 If it exists in a parallel or perpendicular universe intersecting our own in any part, then yes.
Parallel universes are the ones 'along side' ours, overlapping yet not interfering with each other. They can be very different from ours in terms of quantum properties, and are likely to be undetectable or at least virtually so. Wormholes, however, could hypothetically breach the barriers between them if formed from quantum strings of a certain 'flavor'. Perpendicular universes are a newly theorized type of alternate universe, though one I postulated some 20 years ago might exist given how expansion supposedly works. They are expansions like our own, forming in the same 'plane' as ours, but different location. Their edges can slam into ours and create shockwaves we may be able to detect.
A While Ago
*Looks At Chapter Bar*
Heh,Looks Like It'll Be A Long Time Reaching The Latest Chapter
Now
*Looks At Chapter Bar*
HOLY BUCK,THE NEXT CHAPTER IS THE LATEST ONE
2339560 Same here bro
I can see star swirled being the one behind all of this interdenominational transportation, but I would find it amusing if it was lauren faust
i0.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/000/306/356/e22.9549
3386423
mmm
i812.photobucket.com/albums/zz50/frogsplash46/scruffy_second-1.png
3387836 Diabeetus......