• Member Since 11th Dec, 2017
  • offline last seen 13 hours ago

Pone_Heap


I research sugarbeets and love shooting-sports. I wouldn't have believed anyone that told me a decade ago I'd love pony well into my 20's.

Comments ( 54 )

Given yours is the second Courage story to pop up in the last week, it might prompt.

9323075
I've been working on this the last few days. I was very surprised to see a Courage story pop up. You read it? I haven't.

You really did it. I thought you were joking. But knowing you this is normal I guess. :facehoof:

9323081
The other one follows Courage himself. And currently only has one chapter.

Takes quite a bit of creativity and patience to make a one-shot rhyme every line. I'm impressed and hope to see more.

Hey, noone takes one of MY childhood icons (Courage the Dog) and torments him! (No real humans are meant to be threatened.)

9323214
Thanks. Once you get into a groove it starts to come more easily. I think so. Sometimes you come up blank.

9323226
Fred's having the time of his life in the bin, I'm sure. I liked that episode even more than the Ramses episode and that was a good one.

This was surprisingly good. I don't know how, but it held my full attention despite the format and writing style. Good on you.

9323279
I couldn't think of a better way to convey it. It only works, I think, if you can get the "Freaky Fred" scheme in the mind. Even I have to re-read a few lines to get them.

9323288
You held it together really well. I could hear his voice saying all of it as I read. You really did a great job for such a short oneshot.

9323296
Thanks much. I could've had him terrorizing other characters but there's only so much to do before things get stale or more messed up than is necessary or enjoyable. I try to go for what I call "casual sickness" in my writing, and this was a little off-kilter for me.

OH GOD NOT HIM.

Well that's the Worst Story I've ever read

9323842
Really? That's a pretty high bar to clear.

Bringing more shame to yourself I see. I think it works for what it is but I am disappoint... You shirked your epic stuff for this?

How the hell did you amass so many down votes? I thought they would eat up this shit and I would see you in the hot section for once.

9323842
Still a better love story than 50 shades of shit so there is that.

9323288
I actually watched the episode again to get into the groove. Otherwise I was just confused.

9324784
I told you about my old girlfriend, right? The one with all the tattoos? She loved those movies and the book. She wasn't happy when I told her something to the tune of "if I want to watch softcore snuff or scat I'll go on the internet!". I agree with your assertion that the malarkey I pulled out of my ass to write this little travesty is likely better than 50 Shades.

9324787
And I watched the episode to help establish the "groove".

9324782
This was something I did for fun. More Princess to come, and soon enough, more Company.

I'd hoped more people would like it. I'm confident only half of the votes one way or the other gave it a chance. It's easy to hit that "downvote" button; it takes little effort. It could be the content but I doubt it. I'd hoped advertising it with the actual rhyme scheme would do away with some of the perception it was merely filth with no thought or creativity behind it. Whatever. It was still fun.

9324846
I still can not believe a guy like you has ever had girlfriends. :rainbowderp:

9324862
Give me some credit. I'm a dumb redneck that likes guns, beer, ponies, and sugarbeets. What's not to like?

9324879
That chick sounds like half the people that walk into my office. Past and present. No offense.

9324884
Very little offense taken. Should've seen the red flags. I didn't know just what I was getting into with that one. But she moved out to California, saying us Midwesterners were a bunch of Trump-loving assholes and she hoped we freeze to death this winter.

9324891
You dodged bullet with her. And I do not like the fact us Rushmore state folks are lumped in with you dumb rednecks in the valley. :scootangel:

9324899
Now you're just being an ass. :derpytongue2:

9324903
I do my damnedest.

This seems sick... but I laughed! I was shocked to see this from you, given your normal stuff.

:twilightblush:

Beautiful!

9326423
Thanks very much. It was the first time I was actually struck to do anything like this (for the site). It was fun.

9326415
I used to do things like this as writing exercises when I was younger. I could turn out something like this in about an hour, back then, when I got into the swing of it. Some of those were pretty nasty.

Huh, that was a nice little thingy to read before going to bed. I think I'll listen to some Loriot now, just to make it perfect.
Thanks for making me smile a bit more tonight.

9326825
Glad you enjoyed it. I may do another one like it; I haven't decided.

“Mommy! NO, NO touch my pee-pee!” “Cornflakes rooster molested me!”

How did you come up with this?! :rainbowlaugh: I never heard this working. This gets funnier every time I read it.

TF did I just read?! I take a study break and this appears? :derpyderp1:

9327708
I don't know; maybe I'm just a bad person. :pinkiehappy:

9328087
Glad you got a kick out of it.

Very nostalgic. I heard the voice within my head, heard mellow croons instead of read.

So thanks for that.

9331935
Love your user name.

9331935
Glad it worked for you. I'm still surprised no one has complained about Fred being OOC yet.

You've done a swell job writing Fred, for now I hear him in my head
I'll miss A.B., the dear, but now I needn't fear
The madman is where he belongs, time for us to sing songs
Mourn the departed, though do so halfhearted
Because some might take your love to be something... naughty

9339819
Nice. Thanks for reading and I'm glad you enjoyed my ill-advised journey into one-shot.

I'm pretty sure I'll be doing another one of these. It's easy enough once you get into the flow of it. My concerns are redundancy and losing the "casual" nastiness I so enjoy incorporating into my work. I feel the outrageous is best accomplished in writing when it's stated as plainly as talking about the weather or what you had for breakfast.

Nice story, gave me a couple of chuckles.

9363410
Thanks. I'm glad it did. It's not supposed to be "outrageously funny" but neither was the Courage episode, to which this is a poor homage. "Outlandish" is what I was going for.

This was a fun little read. I'd love to see more. Although if I could offer a suggestion, if you do a follow up, you might try a AAAB rhyming scheme, rather than AABB. It seems more fitting with his mannerism imo.:twilightsmile:

9364355
Glad you enjoyed my questionable little tale. I'll look into the aaab rhyme scheme but the Violette form (if that's what you're thinking) seems too constricting for what I want to do. It's too abrupt and kills the flow; the only killing of the flow you want is when he acknowledges his naughtiness.

I know the Courage episode was more faithful to the scheme but a far better writer than I came up with it. Also, it was just an element of the story and didn't drive the actual "plot", whatever that actually was. The scheme would be too hard to keep with the longer and more numerous lines making up the actual story.

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