• Member Since 27th Oct, 2018
  • offline last seen 7 hours ago

Tranquil Serenity

I am a one-shot writer who loves Slice of Life tales and hearing from readers who enjoy my stories. Click on my blogs for an MLP poem.

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Comments ( 15 )

Well, for just a spur of the moment throw-together, this was pretty good.

No problem. Keep doing what you're doing.

Where does Fleur dis Lis fit into this? :rainbowhuh:

She doesn't. Fleur dis Lis has been seen with Fancypants in the series, but they've never officially explained their relationship. Lot's of people pair them together in stories, but others do not. Personally, I think that a story created with either viewpoint has the potential to be an enjoyable read.

Thank you! :pinkiehappy: Cute Starlight avatar by the way. :raritywink:

Why thanks! I'm working on my official OC at the moment. Expect to see her 2019!

"Dearest, Applejack..."

(I noticed only one thing this time.) 'Dearest' modifies 'Applejack', so you should not split the two with a comma despite the temptation to – perhaps induced by previous correct usage of a vocative comma. I know how it is: you see someone being addressed, you just do it. But in this context, the one being addressed is 'dearest Applejack'.

So, I guess this is T.S.-fic reading day! I absolutely despise dislike shipping but can appreciate good writing. One of your strengths I see in all your stories is well-managed pacing via description/narrative. I will avoid saying 'good job' again and instead settle for...

... well done! (Lame, I know.) Another thing I liked in this one is the way you suck the reader in via Applejack's emotional state and how she subsequently interprets the world/goings-on around her.

Thank you! I'm relieved to find you got a degree of enjoyment out of this one too. It seems to be the least popular of my fics, likely because of the unusual pairing...? I'm honestly not sure. Anyways, thank you again for your comment! :twilightsmile:

It may well be the pairing – and this one's also perhaps your 'heaviest', departing most from your show-like formula that you do so well. Not that this one is 'bad'; as I said, I think you did a solid job communicating Applejack's feelings.

Edit: For pony's sake, I said [insert substitute for 'good'] job again.

Of all the ponies AJ has been shipped with over the years this is definitely one of the more unique ones. :applejackconfused:

But why not, and may they have a lifetime of true happiness. (:pinkiehappy: This calls for a PARTY!!!)

Interesting premise but I wished the romance was fleshed out more. It just starts with them already in a relationship. No mention how they got there. Just that its there.

One can only fit so much into a little short story. :applejackunsure:

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