Chapter 1: New Ock, New World
Crystal blue eyes opened with a snap, and Jon Whalen looked around his bedroom that was messy as all hell, I should clean up after I go to the Comic-Con today. He thought. Since his sister and mom were out at work and his dad is in North Dakota working for a trucking company, he was left alone for awhile a day; which was fine by him.
The 300lbs boy looked at the tall covered object in the corner of the room, excited to see his new gift work. He was going as Doc Ock From Spider Man 2, the one where Alfred Molina acted as. He always watched that movie when he was a kid and still does watch it every now and again.
He got up from his chair that he fell asleep in, and walked over to the covered object. He reached out his hand, grabbed the silky fabric, and pulled it off the object.
Jon grinned at the sight of the four mechanical actuators from Alfred Molina’s Doc Ock. It was shipped to him in a crate with a note saying: “ The Power Of The Sun, In The Palm Of My Hand. With Great Power Comes Great Responsibility, Use This Wisely And For Good.” At first, he was confused and apprehensive at the familiar quote from his childhood movie.
But when he opened the giant crate left on his front door, he was elated and awed.
He never tried the actuators on yet, cause he didn’t want to break the inhibitor chip like it did in the movie and become the next Doc Ock, except there wouldn’t be a Spider Man to stop him if that happens.
Jon took a deep breath to calm his nerves down, and walked between the actuators on the platform, where the metal bracket that can connect to his waist to the actuators, took off his leather jacket that he slept in, then clicked the activate button on the panel that was attached to the platform.
As soon as the pain decreased in his spine from the needle injectors, he felt four minds connect to his, and the arms came out of their hold sockets of the platform, and rose in the air with a mental thought, looking around with their sinister blood red sensor lights.
Jon felt something, something that made him laugh; confusion and curiosity from the actuators. They can feel. He thought.
He then checked his watch, and seeing that it was time to go, he walked through his door, the actuators carefully avoiding the walls and door frames as she made his way outside.
The actuators hid beneath his leather jacket, that was somehow accustomed to the four tentacles so it wouldn’t rip if they move around.
The Convention wasn’t that far from his home actually. It was a couple miles away, but he thought that this was a great opportunity to test the actuators by grabbing and climbing random buildings, being careful and gentle to not break any of the structures and to not make any noise.
He felt thrilled, exhilarated, and awed at the power he was feeling in these four actuators holding him up as he scaled the buildings, looking at the scenery with a sense of peace and tranquility.
Pretty soon, they made it to the Comic-Con facility, which was town hall in Kuna, Idaho.
The Actuators hid beneath his jacket again, and Jon walked the rest of the journey to the Con.
Once inside, he looked around and saw all kinds of people dressed up, like a couple who were animatronics from the best game, Five Nights At Freddy’s, Metal Gear Solid, and Anime Like Attack On Titan and Parasyte. He looked on in wonder at the many booths that were set up.
He could feel the actuators’ minds light up in curiosity, and he reluctantly allowed them to snake out from beneath the jacket and roam into the air.
He knew that he was gaining attention, by seeing a kid point at him with an excited grin on their face, while adults looked at him in awe. He normally wasn’t used to the attention, but now with the actuators’ minds, he felt comforted, encouraged, and proud.
He squared his shoulders, and maneuvered through the crowd of people that gathered to stare at him, taking pictures and videos.
He could hear them saying things like, “ My God, isn’t that Alfred Molina’s actuators from Spider Man 2?”
Another, “ He looks really badass with those, it makes him look intimidating too.”
And Another, “ Looks like he became accustomed to them already.”
At the last one, he turned his head and looked at the old man who said it, staring at Jon with a smirk on his face.
The man tilted his head to a dingy booth that was set up next to him, and went inside.
Being curious about the strange man, Jon followed.
Once inside, he let the actuators look around the bigger on the inside booth, feeling their curiosity on the assortments of random things that were stored here.
The man sat on a armchair in the back of the room, saying, “ Welcome, my friend; to The Merchant’s Booth. A Place with rare items that no one can find in your regular store and is absolutely free. Just pick and choose what you want to buy and you can have it!”
Jon felt apprehensive, until he felt an actuator nudge against his mind, and he turned to the left, watching the top left actuator grab something from a pile of random things and snaked through the air back to him, holding the item between its sharp pincers.
Jon looked at the item and slightly widened his eyes at the recognition of it, it was a pair of sunglasses, yet he knew the pair that Alfred’s Doc Ock wore during the movie were one and the same.
Then another actuator, this time the bottom right, grab his attention by holding a large brown trench coat over its coils.
Jon recognized the coat, Alfred’s trench coat from the Spider Man 2 Movie.
He looked towards the man and said, “ How much are these?”
The old man smiled, “ It's free. Try it on, it might fit ya.”
Jon saw the four symmetrical holes in the back of the trench coat and made the arms slip through with ease, being careful to not rip the fabric, and kept his other jacket on since it was fall, so it was cold.
Then all he saw last, was a bright light surrounding him, and the gleeful smile on the Merchant’s face…
The next thing that Jon knew was waking up.
He got to his feet with the help of the two bottom actuators to keep his balance, otherwise, he would’ve fallen down again.
Jon looked around to see where he was, and saw that he was on top of an abandoned warehouse, across a school with a horse statue in front.
For some reason, it looked familiar to him. But he put it to the back of his mind for later.
He looked to see if the Merchant or whatever his name was, is around, but no sign.
Jon sighed, and looked to the top left actuator that rested its head pincers on his shoulder, giving a small squeak to communicate with him.
Since he and the actuators were connected without the inhibitor chip breaking to make him psychotic, he could understand the four easily in his head.
Jon replied to the actuator that spoke from his shoulder, “ I honestly don’t know where we are, but I have a feeling I DO know.”
Despite the slight confusion coming from his actuators, he looked towards the school and thought about his next move since waking up…
He shrugged, deciding that he should at least check out the high school across the street, maybe get a job there He thought. He only had a hundred bucks in his wallet, after all.
The actuators moved to his mental request since they were sentient as him, and he would feel bad if he ordered them around, not because they were dangerous if angered, but he was a good guy.
He scaled down the warehouse’s brick wall with the help of the arms with ease and made it to the pavement as he fell a few feet above the ground.
He looked around and saw that it was about noon due to the position of the sun in the sky, and he knew there would be people that would freak out at the sight of the arms, despite the awe-filled faces and smiles he got at the convention, cause they thought it was a good costume.
The actuators slunk behind him and tucked themselves tight against his back and under the trench coat, hidden from sight.
Jon sighed in slight relief as he felt the four of them hide under the coat.
He then took a slight breath of courage and walked across the street, making sure that there were no cars coming, otherwise it would’ve been painful.
He made it across the street and made his way up the concrete stairs and approached the front glass doors.
He hesitated for a second, contemplating whether going inside is a good idea with the four actuators just hiding under the coat.
Jon then shook his head, If this is all I’ve got to keep myself from asking for a job, then I need to man up and face the music if I get caught. He thought to himself and opened the door by pulling on the handle.
Then he went inside, the door shut behind him.
He was slightly thrown for a loop at the pastel colored people that were milling around the halls, some look young enough to be students and TA’s, others look old enough to be teachers and staff.
He went his way inside a small office that was next to the front doors and another office.
The only thing that caught his eye was a woman that looked about thirty years old with a slim, but fit body.
She was wearing dark jeans that fit her well and a light blue shirt with a crescent moon on the collars, she was also wearing silver high heels, which is a slight unique color choice.
She was sitting at a large oak wood desk doing paperwork with a bored look on her face, her blue eyes then darted up from her papers and caught the two blue orbs staring at her from the shadows in the admittedly dark office.
She jumped in her chair, a look of surprise on her face, which slightly made him chuckle in amusement.
She spoke, a red hue on her cheeks and a sheepish tone in her voice made Jon almost want to hug her for some reason, “ I am sorry, I didn’t hear anyone come in. My name is Luna, what can I do for you?”
Jon smiled, Eeyup I recognise this place alright. He thought in amusement to the four actuators hiding under the trench coat.
He said as he sat down on the comfortable chair in front of the desk, “ Well Ms. Luna. I am wondering if you have a job opening that’s available?”
Stats
Page generated in 0.019 seconds
Total duration
624 users online
797,979 hits today, 2,004,447 yesterday
FIMFiction
My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
Designed and coded by knighty & Xaquseg - © 2011-2024
Follow & Support Us
Support us
SubStar
Chat!
Discord
Follow us
Twitter
MLP: Friendship is Magic® - © 2024 Hasbro Inc.®
Fimfiction is in no way affiliated with or endorsed by Hasbro Inc.®
Author Verbatim:
Displaced Community: o wowz this is an sooper crative and orijinal fan fiction maor plx im totez an machure grown-up
Acknowledging that your premise is overdone does not make it any less overdone. I don't even think it's an exaggeration anymore that Displaced is the most common type of fic on the entire site now due to how easy it is to write a "good" (Read: Appeal to the target demographic who don't know any better) Displaced fic compared to writing something with actual quality.
Seriously, even the premise itself lends itself to be easily writeable. Take property A, take a character from said property, rip any sense of personality from them and replace them with whatever kind of personality you want. Throw them into the continuity of property B (In this case, MLP.) and just have them tag along with canon events, maybe changing a few things so it's not a complete retread.
Bada-bing, bada-boom you got yourself a "successful" fanfic. This is like the fucking asset flip of Fimfiction with how lazy this shit is and I will never tire of telling people to write literally anything else.
9247927
it's not that creative, I just thought randomly for it. Sorry if the story looks crap.
9248249
If you didn't want public reactions to your work, why are you posting it on a public forum?
9248249
Fascist says what?
OOOHHH! It was in walltext! Hey everyone, looks like free speech doesn’t apply to anyone if the author’s story was once walltext!/s
That’s the thing though. These stories aren’t the least bit imaginative. The fact that your own description showcases how dime-a-dozen these stories are proves this.
We’re not hating you for what you create. We simply hate what you create. World of difference.
I'd have to say that it's probably for the best if you listen to criticism. It is, after all, one of the best ways to improve.
9248249
Disregarding the right to free speech (As this is a privately owned site and hence does not have to follow those regulations.), point to the rule on Fimfiction that says I can't criticize your work. I'll wait.
Exactly.
You can surely do better than Displaced, then. I'm not asking for War and Peace here, but Displaced is the bottom of the barrel in term of imagination and creativity.
Who said I hated you, the person behind the screen? Sure, my comment is harsh, but I never said anything along the lines of "You suck at writing." Surely you can recognize the difference between a harshly worded comment about how generic your premise is and a personal attack, right?
Like I get it, getting shit for writing something sucks. I used to write too, you know. I put what felt like my heart and soul into things and it never panned out as expected.
That's because 75% of my writing is fucking garbage. I'm not saying yours is by comparison, hell all Displaced looks the fucking same to me at this point, but there's certainly improvement to be made, you know? You don't just start of immensely good at writing, you have to fuck up a few times, maybe get some criticism, improve, write better, learn how to properly structure a story, etc. etc.
Do you think I managed to write something like Fluttershy Kicks Puppies without writing another 10 trash stories that never even came close to it in quality? Because I sure as hell had to write a bunch of crap before something clicked. Even then, I still fuck up my own writing a lot.
Ah, this is going on for too long. Just like, stop takin' it personally. It's just a fanficition lad, not your magnum opus life's work. You'll forget you wrote this in like 5 years anyway.
9248335
you're right, not everyone has awesome writing skills, they do their best. I also apologize for not knowing the difference, I am an idiot at knowing expressions and social cues.
So far so good. I like it.