It was around 9 a.m., I was sound asleep, there was a knocking at my door and I wasn't in the mood, for those unaware my name is Spike, and I am... well I was the number one assistant to Princess Twilight Sparkle. I'm now living in Manehattan, away from the girls if you want to know about that well...it's a long story. Here's some good news however, I did start my own business and got my own license as a private investigator. That felt like an appropriate way to distance myself from the girls, private investigator. Where police fail to do their jobs the families of the victims rely on me to help crack the case open, and I have on several occasions. I solved a 10 year old cold case where a girl had gone missing, much to the chagrin of police department, I got a reward for my courageous acts and for going above and beyond the call of duty. Except, I've never served in the police or military. The closest I've come to 'call of duty' is working for Twilight and that wasn't all that glamorous.
There was another knock on my door. I knew who it was, it was my secretary. Yes I have a secretary, I picked her up off the streets. Her name is Quick Pick, or at least that's what she told me, I'm more than convinced she's lying to me, she said got that name with how handy she is with a lockpick. I caught her trying to break into my office she was just looking for a quick score, but I managed to convince her to do some steady work for me. I pay her 25% of whatever I get paid, which due to the solving of several high profile cases makes me very in demand, nine times out of ten it's usually some wife checking to see that if her husband is cheating on her or not. Sometimes it is, or sometimes just on occasion the guy is just doing a weird hobby that he doesn't want anyone to know about. Missing persons, murder investigations, thefts, kidnappings, those crimes are a dime a dozen and they're very exhausting.
They also hardly ever come by my door, like I said I pick up the pieces that the police leave behind. In the meantime, I cope with these things by drinking a lot of alcohol. The legal drinking age for ponies is 210 and I'm 415, the magic in our systems expands our lifespans by centuries, not including the all-bloods or the princesses. They have the blood of the Terrans, blood of the Valkyries, and blood of the Magi. Twilight was originally a Magi-blood, being able to manipulate and control all forms of magic. Rainbow is a Valkyrie, and Pinkie is a Terran, just for some points of reference. I'm a drakeblood, or for lack of a better term. I'm a dragon, I stand at an impressive 6'1 and I weigh 215 lbs, I had to put on a lot of muscle in order to pass the physical exam for the private investigators license. Don't know why though, some of the other people here look like pieces of shit. In the more recent years I have developed a foul mouth.
There was another knock on my door, "JACK, IF YOU DON'T WAKE UP NOW I SWEAR TO THE SISTERS I'M GONNA KICK DOWN THIS DOOR!"
"Alright! I'm up!" I said, "Just give me 15 minutes to get ready."
"I'll give you 5." Quick said.
I groaned and grabbed a silver ring, I put it on and it turned my iconic neon green hair and eye color into a dark chocolate brown. Something a little more forgettable, if you're wondering why she called me Jack instead of Spike, it's as simple as this. I wanted to get the hell out of the shadow of the elements of harmony as soon as possible. I asked for a favor from my mother, Princess Celestia and she granted my wish. In exchange, I had to keep her updated on my status and to visit from time to time whenever I could. I didn't have much of a choice, it was either being unhappy or trying and potentially failing at being happy. So I chose the latter I also chose a new name, Jack Drake it has a nice ring to it I should say. I finished off a letter and sent it off via my dragon breath, I should expect a reply later tonight. I twisted my back and cracked it into place and looked at the cot that I had slept on, "I've got to get a fucking bed." I put my white t-shirt on, put on my jeans and slipped on my trench coat, I then put on my hat and opened the door.
Quick was just looking at me, "You're late, you were supposed to be in your office half an hour ago. For paperwork involving that cheating case."
"Oh yeah, cheating case number 825, the curse of the gay man." I said.
"Har-Har." Quick said, Quick had red hair and orange eyes with pale complexion. She's a valkyrie, so she can fly and she's a little leaner than other people. She stands at 5'6 and weighs 110 lbs give or take. "That joke wasn't funny the first time you said it, it's not funny the millionth time you said it."
"Yeah well, I don't fucking care. It's funny to me." I said.
"Still with that foul mouth Mr. Drake?" Quick asked.
"We're not on the clock yet Ms. Pick so you can stop with the formality. We're headed to Mr. Deli's by the way."
"You can't start without your morning coffee can you?" Quick asked.
"Nope, and not without my morning bagel as well." I said as I smirked, "I know you can't resist their tuna melts either."
"...Damn you." Quick said.
"I'll pay don't worry." I smirked once more.
"When you pay for me you usually take it out of my paycheck!" Quick said as I started to jog to Mr. Deli's. She started to run after me.
We soon got into the deli and the man behind the counter, Mr. Deli himself already had our orders ready. "Hello Mr. Drake, how are you today?"
"I've got paperwork. Just finished up another case, going to send them a bill." I said as I paid.
"Hmm, I'd never understand how you do it." Mr. Deli, a neightalian terran that was a bit overweight at 312 lbs and 5'11, with wispy golden brown hair.
"It's tough, and disgusting at times but mostly it's just sitting in a car and waiting, maybe a little breaking and entering." I said as I grabbed our order and my coffee. I nodded my thanks and took a sip of the hot coffee, but it's not like it could really affect me that much, I'm a drakeblood. So hot foods, be it temperature or spice they don't affect my tongue. I looked at Quick, "You're two minutes and 39 seconds late."
Quick was bent over and breathing heavy, "Why does that matter?"
"It could be life or death. You've got to be able to react fast, the situation doesn't matter. I stopped the kidnapping of a key witness to a murder trial in less than a minute." I said. On the side, I've been training Quick to be her own private eye she can't rely completely on her ability to fly, I've seen some of the fastest Valkyries struggle to save people from falling to their deaths. I handed her our food, "Be careful, now let's go to the office."
I led the way to our office, Emerald Investigations. It was several blocks from here, Quick caught up without trying to spill our food. "Remind me again, why you don't use your car?"
"Because recharging is expensive." I took some spare bits out of my jacket pocket and gave it to a homeless person.
"Sisters bless you kind sir." The man replied.
I rolled my eyes and continued on towards my office, with Quick behind me I unlocked the door to Emerald Investigations. I turned on the lights and open the door to my office, I put my hat and jacket on a coat rack and sat down behind my desk and started to fill out paperwork while drinking my coffee. Quick walked into my office and gave me my bagel. I started to eat my bagel with cream cheese and sapphire sprinkles. Quick looked at me, "I think we have a new client, they've actually come in."
"This early in the morning? Tell them I'll be with them soon, I just have to change."
"Into your suit? Yeah I know you keep a closet full of suits in your office."
"Always be prepared."
"Rule number one." Quick said.
I finished my bagel and downed my coffee and soon put on a nice black and white suit complete with a tie. I finished up my paperwork and then put it to the side and organized everything. The door opened to reveal...the girls. Twilight Sparkle, Pinkie Pie, Rarity Belle, Applejack, Rainbow Dash, Fluttershy, and Starlight Glimmer. I was speechless, I was absolutely stunned.
"Jack Drake?" Twilight asked.
I coughed and spoke up, "Y-Yes? What is it that you need assistance with?"
"We would like you to help us locate a missing person. They disappeared about 2 years ago, the police had searched but no body was ever recovered so we have reason to believe that this person is still alive."
"It would help if I could have a name and a descriptive gender." I said.
"The description is that of a male, and he's a drakeblood with bright green hair, his name is Spike Solaris." Twilight choked out some tears, "Please help us find him. We miss him."
Well this is pretty interesting for sure. It seems like this would be a simple matter for Spike to fix. Just contact his mother and get her to tell Twilight Spike is living somewhere else or working for her in dragon country or something. I do like how Spike knows his time with Twi wasn't that great. In am sure he still love her like a sister but working with her just looks like a nightmare. And the rest of the girls and their interactions with him weren't great either. So I for sure can't see him wanting to run back to interact with them. I am shocked he didn't move to Fillydelphia in the dragon district. But I guess that would be the first place anyone would look for him
Ooooohhh, Spikes in troooouuuble.
Interesting start, but it's missing a few commas and periods here and there.
Instead of:
I caught her trying to break into my office she was just looking for a quick score, but I managed to convince her to do some steady work for me.
It should be:
I once caught her trying to break into my office. She was just looking for a quick score, but I managed to convince her to do some steady work for me.
Well this has got to be the easiest case to solve Jack has ever gotten; go for the flat rate
Why? Why increase everyone's ages? And by CENTURIES no less...
9238350
Personal preference. Makes things more interesting.
9236448
Actually, Starlight has done nothing but show him respect everytime they were on screen together.
9238353
Dont mean to be nitpicky, but it neither makes sense or adds anything to the character to make them this old. Frankly, it seems like you wanted to make him 41, and thought "Gee, that sounds boring" and added a zero.
9396047
Whenever I need a random number I usually use the word count because that actually makes sense, also if I'm being honest with myself I think the only reason why the number is so high is because all the world's inhabitants are descending from mythical and magical creatures. And since we as a race have no access to any actual magic other than slight of hand tricks, we don't actually know what magic would do. It's interesting to me, that's why the personal preference. This is the SECOND time I'm answering this question and you all are getting hung up on it. It's just a number, that never comes up again in the story. Let. It. Go.
man, i'd be so fired if i didn't warn my boss about a princess waiting to see him.
kind of a jarring transition to getting to the office and hardly anytime passing for customers.
Oh, very interesting!
??? What! That was a surprise at the end.
Did he fake his own death or something? Just disappear out of the blue and ask mommy Celestia to keep him in the dark? Geez, talk about over complicated.
I (possibly) already know this will be funny (for a better word) right off the bat.
Whoa.. I did not see that coming.
Looks good so far, but there's only one major qualm I've got that's tricky to puzzle. Only been gone for two years. That means that he was quite old while he was "working" for twilight. I haven't read further yet, but I hope that's addressed later.
He could have been with her for hundreds of years since his birth, or he could just be an employee of a few years. Other than the weird timescale you've got going, it makes perfect sense so far.
Lets see where this goes.
Oh boy this is going to be good