Prank War!

by Ashfur

To whom it may concern

“Hey, Twilight. How was your day today?”

The purple alicorn smiled weakly at her assistant, before slumping down in her chair at the dinner table.

“Oh. That bad?” Spike turned away from his cooking for a moment to give Twilight a sympathetic hug. “Do you wanna talk about it while I finish making this lasagna?”

Twilight groaned, but began to speak. “Ugh, Spike, today was just one thing after another. Fluttershy's animals escaped from their pens, and it took all of us working together to round them back up. But that meant that Rainbow wasn't setting up tomorrow's rainstorm, which meant Fluttershy and I had to help her out, and Applejack had to watch the animals to make sure they didn't get out again, but that meant she was behind on work at the farm, and…” She slammed her head on the table, as though it were the softest pillow in the world. “Ugh.”

“Sounds like you did the work of ten ponies today, Twi. Although if you tell me Pinkie got behind in her work, I'm going to call your bluff there.” The drake opened the oven to check on the food, before deciding it wasn't done and leaving it to bake more.

“Of course she didn't, she has secret cupcake stashes everywhere. And even if she didn't, she's Pinkie, she'd make it work somehow. I wish I had some time to read, but I don't think I could even finish 400 pages tonight I'm so tired!” As she bemoaned her day, Spike brought her a mug of cider, which she quickly downed. “Thanks, that helps… a little.”

Suddenly, Spike burped out a letter, catching it in his claw and taking note of the seal. “Oh, hey! This is from Nick, I thought it was Celestia. I guess she decided to let him send letters over dragonfire again. I appreciate that, he usually gives me delicious gemstones as ‘postage’. Heh.”

The scroll was quickly snagged out of his grasp by a lavender glow. “Let's see what this is, then. If Nick convinced Celestia to send it over for him, it must be important.” She unfurled the scroll and began to read.

Deer twilightsparkle,

Her eye twitched.

Dis is Nick! Come to my attention it has that a good many things need to be adress between us. To begin, your castle needs a moat so Nick throw into you can do easyily. Teleporting him to canterlot is big waste of magic that causes annoyance muchly.

Third, plz inform rare that pants are required because large knee hole. Dark colours colors no neon pink trousers please

second why do you ask 4 knowledge of humans culture history and beehavior. This perplexes Nock much? U know human worlds exist mirror portal. Use it, analyze, return, ask compare notes with best prankster, profit.

Also, there's something incredibly, incredibly important I need to tell you! You need to come up here NOW, I'm running out of-

The ink trailed off from there, as though something had interrupted the letter. Twilight's eye twitched. Again.

---

Nick sat at his desk, humming a simple, rolling tune to himself. All of a sudden, Twilight appeared in the room in a brilliant flash of light. Her mane was ragged, her eyes bloodshot and wild from exhaustion.

It took Nick a moment to collect his bearings from the blinding flash, rubbing the spots out of his eyes so he could see again. “Sparky? What in the blue blazers are you doing here this late?”

“Where's the emergency?! You wrote me and it was infuriating, but then you seemed panicked at the end! What happened, all you said was that you were running out of something!”

The human chuckled. “Oh, that? I couldn't write any longer, because I ran out of…”

“Well?! What did you run out of?”

“Ink.”

That night, a few reports came into the local guard station of a strange shape being thrown from Canterlot Castle into the moat. They were dismissed as just low-flying birds, and the ponies were sent on their way. Then the guards made a note to find out who won the betting pool of which princess was going to toss Nick into the moat next.

Author's Note:

Lol I didnt tell my editor about the grammar good letter, let's see how long it takes him to notice

Update: It took 16 minutes

Comments

[Raistlin]

Nick just awakened Twilight´s inner grammar nazi.

i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/000/906/348/be1.png

[Da Fennec]

Nick is lucky there is a proscribed punishment for his pranks. me thinks Twilight was annoyed enough to have tossed him in several times.. As Twilight having a moat that isn't very friendly and imagine all the paperwork involved..

DIS missive probably isn't annoying to Twilight be Da EDiTOR as well

[AdmiralPopeyesBeard]

You clever bastard...

Edit: Also, that letter hurt to read.

[LordMentat]

Trying to read that letter made my eyes hurt.

[Dashie04]

9379507
That picture is so perfect, also you mistyped had as bad at one point

...and Applejack bad...”

Right here.

[AdmiralPopeyesBeard]

9379548
Well fug, I missed another typo. Thanks.

[ANW]

Did you pranked your own editor?😶
I'll prep the hot chocolate.😔

[Ashfur]

9379728
Even I dont know how many I put in! I didn't bother counting, I just used my skills of doing grammering goodly

[Raven dove]

🕈♏🕯❒♏ ■□ ⬧⧫❒♋■♑♏❒⬧ ⧫□ ●□❖♏
✡□◆ &■□⬥ ⧫♒♏ ❒◆●♏⬧ ♋■♎ ⬧□ ♎□ ✋
✌ ♐◆●● ♍□❍❍♓⧫❍♏■⧫🕯⬧ ⬥♒♋⧫ ✋🕯❍ ⧫♒♓■&♓■♑ □♐
✡□◆ ⬥□◆●♎■🕯⧫ ♑♏⧫ ⧫♒♓⬧ ♐❒□❍ ♋■⍓ □⧫♒♏❒ ♑◆⍓
✋ j◆⬧⧫ ⬥♋■■♋ ⧫♏●● ⍓□◆ ♒□⬥ ✋🕯❍ ♐♏♏●♓■♑
☝□⧫⧫♋ ❍♋&♏ ⍓□◆ ◆■♎♏❒⬧⧫♋■♎
☠♏❖♏❒ ♑□■■♋ ♑♓❖♏ ⍓□◆ ◆◻
☠♏❖♏❒ ♑□■■♋ ●♏⧫ ⍓□◆ ♎□⬥■
☠♏❖♏❒ ♑□■■♋ ❒◆■ ♋❒□◆■♎ ♋■♎ ♎♏⬧♏❒⧫ ⍓□◆
☠♏❖♏❒ ♑□■■♋ ❍♋&♏ ⍓□◆ ♍❒⍓
☠♏❖♏❒ ♑□■■♋ ⬧♋⍓ ♑□□♎♌⍓♏
☠♏❖♏❒ ♑□■■♋ ⧫♏●● ♋ ●♓♏ ♋■♎ ♒◆❒⧫ ⍓□◆

✡□◆🕯❖♏ ♌♏♏■ ❒♓♍& ❒□●●♏♎

[Raven dove]

9379811
It's windigos here's a translator have fun
https://wingdingstranslator.com

[Ashfur]

9379816
Seems not even I'm safe. Well done.

[Raven dove]

9379841
Lol

[mishun]

Then the guards made a note to find out who won the betting pool of which princess was going to toss Nick into the moat next.

I'm sure coefficient for Cadance is really good now. He can conspire with her and some guard to make the bet and win jackpot.

[Zapper Frost]

Dizchapter gud me it like asfurr thank

[Steakthedog]

9379811
YOUR EVILE NU RIK ROLS U IDIONT.

[Raccoon Writer]

9379507
That is so wrong, but so right....

[Vayne Hellslinger]

I will wake up tomorrow morning, have a nice cup of morning roast while I eat my eggs and bacon, and I will write a proper translation of this libel against English if it's the last thing I do.

[spikls]

This chopper is many pleasure thanking the other name is ashur.

[Black--Soul]

Grammar Prank?