Munched 4: Live Free or Munch Hard
Day court was rather boring on the average afternoon. Nobles bickered, bills passed or failed to do so, the occasional petitioner had to get kicked out, and one or two ponies brought a gift for the solar alicorn. Celestia almost wished something interesting would happen, but she knew that such a line of thinking was nothing short of saying 'Hey Discord, come and turn the whole of Canterlot upside-down!' At least Twilight was helping today, and Celestia really appreciated the company. The only thing that seemed remotely out of place was Nick and Luna pulling a cart piled high with something covered by a tarp. She figured it was for some prank later, and made a not to try and figure out what it was before it hit her. That's what spies are for, after all.
Meanwhile, the princess of the night and her human ally were setting everything up. "So, why exactly are we going through all this effort for a cake? I know it's my sister's cake, but you could just ask one of the chefs to make you one. You DO have some degree of authority around here, after all."
"It's the principle of the matter," Nick responded. "Plus, I've seen a lot of crazy things happen because of what I can only describe as the plot of a kid's show, so I've been trying to capitalize on that by playing the genre to my favor."
"When was this?"
"Last week when I was running from Celestia and somehow every door in the hallway led back to the hallway. It was straight out of a popular show called Scooby-Doo."
"Chase scenes are no less common than spontaneous musical numbers, Nicholas. You know this," Luna explained, befuddled as to where the human was going with this line of thinking.
"Well I figured I'd try playing a different genre to my favor. I'm not about to go painting a door and escaping through it, only Discord could hope to pull that off. But if there's one genre I know, it's action movies." He smiled at the fond memories of the genre's many tropes. "Anyway, this heist rides on two of the biggest rules of action movies: You're a badass if you don't look at explosions, and badasses aren't hurt by explosions."
"That explains all the dynamite. You're lucky we have quite the repair budget."
Celestia cantered down the hall towards the main kitchen. She had just finished day court, and she was hungry for a cake. Twilight was following, but the purple alicorn wasn't in the mood for as sweet a treat as cake. All that came to a halt, however, when they saw Nick casually leaning against the doorframe of the kitchens, with a platter in his hands. On that platter, covered by a glass dome enchanted to never break and keep the confection fresh, was one of Celestia's precious cakes.
"Took ya long enough, princess. Something seems to be eatin' ya, though."
Celestia saw red for a moment. "Hand it over, Nick. You've proven your point. I don't know how you got one of my cakes, and I don't care. Give it back."
"Let me think about that. Hmmmmno." And with a over-exaggerated bow, he took off running.
"After him!" Celestia and Twilight took off after their friend, hooves pounding the floor as they galloped closer. They almost had him when Nick took a running leap over a railing instead of taking the stairs, using a floral arrangement below to cushion his fall. That was when the explosions started.
Two moderately sized blasts went off on either side of the flowers the moment he impacted the ground, silhouetting Nick against a backdrop of fire. The two alicorns in pursuit had jumped after him, but were caught off-guard by the blasts and were stunned long enough for Nick to make a mad dash down the hall. As he ran with his rivals in hot pursuit, several more explosions rocked the hall, so much that the entire castle shook for a few moments. That mini-quake happened to make Blueblood spill wine all over his vest, but nopony would know that until later.
Nick kept running. Every turn and jump on his route was followed by explosions, making the whole thing really seem like something straight out of an action movie. For the grand finale, he dashed off a balcony and used a nearby banner to slide down the wall of the castle to the ground, where a small table he had set up before was there waiting for him.
As rubble collapsed around him, he had only one thing to say. "Aw yeah, I'm a badass. And to the victor go the spoils!" Taking the cake out of its casing, nick took several mouthfuls of the delicious treat before slowing down. There was something distinctly non-cakey inside the cake. he swallowed the remainder of the bite in his mouth before taking a closer look at his prize. He noticed, baked into the cake, several familiar blue flowers.
"Oh, crudbuckets."
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Make him the most serious person in the world. I feel like poison joke would play on personality, rather than species, so that's my reason for that.
9223127
Nah from what we've seen poison joke only effects physical things not mental
Make the joke something that makes it hard to prank people
I wasn't aware Luna was a prankster.
What if it turned Nick into a phantom or Ghost-like being, but in turn is actually more akin to astral projection or out of body experience while leaving his body in a state of meditation that makes it seem like he died. This will not only cause a major panic among the princesses thinking that one of them had killed Nick, while he in turn tries numerous ways to do more pranks and stop the princesses from burying him in an early grave. It will also make for more hijinx to be caused and to have the princesses try to keep Nick away from poison joke. This will certainly be appropriate for both the season and later chapters.
It turns him into an... ANON!!! Dun Dun DUUUUUN (With suit, mask, green skin and antisocial behavior included)
Have nick suddenly become an alicorn of deception...because at this point why not?
Well since he's not magical it can't affect him directly. Maybe give him an allergic reaction like a bad case of the hives. All over the body... as in also in unmentionable places.
9223180
Yes so much yes
Turn him into a HER
Oh man, this is a hard one...
Turn him into Pink Guy from Filthy Frank's show?
Have the posion joke turn him into Ditto from pokemon allowing him to transform into anybody or pony which he then gose on a pranking spree as the princesses try to figure out which pony he is pretending to be to catch him and cure him of the posion joke
Due to his alien biology Poison joke can’t affect him but he does become a living transition vector. If he so much as touches someone they will be infected by poison joke.
9223662
Phenomenal idea, but waaaay too much work. I'm not paying you to come up with an idea that's gonna make me come up with joke effects for the entire cast!
Then again, I'm not paying you anyway.
Maybe sometime down the line... after I kick this cold. It's hard enough to type as it is with being tired, having a really sore throat, still needing to go to work... at this point I'd eat poision joke on the slim chance it would make me feel better.
Make him stuffier than blueblood
Hmm, how about he ends up with his body producing Pheromones and scents that drive Mare’s wild with lust or affection towards the human but it has an even stronger effect on Alicorns.
9223985
Check the rating. No can do.
9224042
Oh, okay then.
What about instead of Lustful how about all the Mares just want to snuggle and hug the Human to death because of how good he smells?
Easier poison joke to turn Nick into something else and that is turn his hair into mood of princess mane/hair like when Nick is feel bad or bad emotion, his hair will turn into Luna's mane. if his feel happy or good mood, then his hair will turn into Celestia's mane. And his feelings mix, then turn into Twilight's mane.It will be hilarious joke of who he mess around in the pass that will turn against him of who him prank.
9223752
Fair point, in that case why not use the idea in a future prank but instead of poison joke how about just a regular illness. Diseases can rarely jump species when they go about their life cycle, and when it does occur the symptoms shown in the new species are likely very different from those displayed in its original hosts. It’s just as likely that Nick could live his whole life in Equestria and not get sick, as it is that could become very ill from a minor pony disease.
It could be an accidental prank, perhaps he was unknowningly interacting with a pony who had a highly contagious cold, and accidentallies spreads it to the Sisters and some of the castle staff. After a quick dunk in the most and several immunization shots, as punishment he has to care of everyone he got sick.
9223339
I like this one it would make it a joke on everyone
I've got a idea, how about Day of Lavos happens, or even better, nothing happens, but Luna and Celestia decide to just troll him into thinking something happened to him. You may ask, "Why?", but i say, "Why not?"
It's a bit of a cop out, but what if he becomes really clumsy so when he tries to get revenge for the prank he just fucks up constantly?
I think he should change sex. That would be great! <3
Though now I have to wonder...who baked Poison Joke into Celestia's cake? Is this Luna pranking Nick I wonder?
I’m starting to see a trend in titles for these chapters.
Nick always failing to get Celestia’s cake stash reminds me of that YouTube series ‘Rainbow Dash’s Precious Book’
Nick becomes "Sleeping Beauty", and all the princess have to kiss him
Gender-Flipping always makes for fun and chaos