The end of the vigil
Princess Celestia let out a long sigh she didn’t even realize she was holding. This time of the year was always hard on her, being the anniversary of that fateful night so many years ago. Every year for the first four hundred years, she lamented the loss of her sister in public for all to see. Only after decades of pressure and seeing the despondent looks on her subject’s faces did she finally relent and make the Many Moons Vigil a penta annual event. The other four years in between, she still mostly spent the night binging on ice cream and self deprecation until sleep finally took her. When the fifth year rolled around, every pony at the castle knew where she would be.
This year, however, the staff seemed different. They were on edge, and many of them were trading furtive glances with one another. Her advisor even managed the courage to remind Celestia that her sister was right down the hall. When the alicorn fixed her with a glare, the conversation ended abruptly.
So it was this year, just like five years ago, Celestia walked into Ponyville, her head held not quite as high as usual. Dressed in a tattered black cloak, her shimmering mane was hidden to the public. Her hoofsteps, though steady, soon slowed. It was obvious right off the bat that something was different this year.
“What in Equestria is going on here?”
Booths were set up near the clock tower tended by various ponies. The fact that sundown would be upon the town in less than an hour meant any booth open would be unusual, much less during the Many Moons Vigil. Decorations of moons, suns, and bows were placed strategically through the town. Banners hanging between the buildings proclaimed the return of Princess Luna, and the joyous reunion of Equestria’s leaders. Ignoring the curiously chipper feel of the event, she walked up to one of the booths which had large stacks of white and dark blue robes on display. Behind the booth stood a familiar and positively radiant pony.
“Good evening, Rarity. What, may I ask, are you handing out?” Celestia asked.
Rarity, sitting in her booth, clopped her hooves together and squealed in happiness. “Good evening, Your Highness! I’m just here to pass out the robes for the Many Moons Festival.”
Celestia’s eyes widened. “Excuse me, did you say ‘festival’?”
Rarity did her level best not to squeal again, and failed. “Oh, ho ho! I did indeed, Your Majesty! The holiday seems to be going in a new direction to celebrate the return of your beloved sister and Equestria’s Princess of the Night. I have made brand new robes with a unique twist,” Rarity said. Stepping out from behind the booth, she struck a pose. Dressed in a white robe with a striking figure of the sun embroidered on the side, she gave a refined laugh. “Isn’t it beautiful? A world’s difference from this holiday’s usual attire. Robes made to celebrate the extraordinary rulers of our great land. Oh, but where are my manners? I know you’re already dressed, but I have something special for you, and that cloak has definitely seen better days.”
Reaching under the booth, Rarity pulled out two silk robes. One white with a sun design embroidered into it, and one dark blue with a moon design. “I made these especially for you and somepony else. Choose whichever you wish.”
In all her years, Celestia could recall every instance in which she lost her temper. Down to the date, she knew every delegate, villain, and unfortunate event that brought her anger to a boil. The reason for this was simple.
She rarely lost her temper.
Over the years, Celestia kept her cool through nearly any hardship or struggle that she and her kingdom faced. At this moment, however, she felt the fire rise inside her. Being careful not to let her facade crack, she smiled sweetly at Rarity. “I think I’ll pass. You could assist me in another manner, though.”
Putting the silk robes away, Rarity smiled back. “What a waste. If you change your mind, I’ll have them here. What else was it you needed?”
It took a moment for Celestia to filter out the expletives her mind naturally placed in her query. “Who made these changes?”
Rarity let out a good natured chuckle. “Oh, that would be Clockwork. She’s been busy these last few weeks trying to make this all come together. I think she’s done a wonderful job. Did you know she was the one who repaired the clock tower?”
“No, I didn’t. I think I’ll go check out the rest of the festival. If you’ll excuse me.”
“Of course, Princess Celestia. Have fun!”
Celestia could barely hear herself think above the grinding of her own teeth. She marched further into Ponyville in measured steps, calculating and adding up every little decoration that dared make light of this solemn event.
“Oh! What is that one called?”
Celestia’s blood ran cold. That voice was one she didn’t want to hear at all tonight. Trotting through the crowd gathered outside the clock tower, she saw something that confirmed her worst suspicions. “Sister! Wh-what are you doing here?”
Dressed in a white silk robe with a now familiar sun design on it, Princess Luna turned to face her.
“Ah! Celly! I know you love to partake in sweets. Have you seen these?” Luna asked, thrusting a small round chocolate covered cake-like object toward her.
Pushing it aside, Celestia gave her a chuckle. “I’m afraid not. I was just trying to find somepon-”
“They’re called moon pies!” Luna interrupted. “They’re made of two graham crackers with marshmallow in the middle, all coated in chocolate! Moon pies! Isn’t that simply wonderful?”
An earnest smile finally managed its way to Celestia’s lips. Seeing her sister happy always had that effect on her. Nevertheless, she wasn’t about to let this sidetrack her. “That’s nice, but I’m-”
Luna’s excitement wouldn’t be so easily dismissed. Her eyes were practically sparkling with excitement. “Did you know there was a Many Moons Festival? I didn’t until I got the invite today. As soon as I read it was being held in Ponyville, I couldn’t wait to go. It’s nice to catch up with friends, after all.”
“Right, friends. I was just about to go hunt- I mean, find one of them in particular. If you’ll excu-”
A vivid pink mane sprouted up from Celestia’s side. “Princess Celestia!”
An audible groan managed to escape Celestia’s lips. “Good evening, Pinkie Pie.”
“I saw you talking to Princess Luna and thought you might be thinking that moon pies were the only thing we were serving tonight. Nosirree, I say. I also made sun cakes!” Pinkie rambled as she thrust a tray toward the solar princess. The “sun cakes” all looked rounded and covered in a white coating. Pinkie broke one open for Celestia to see. “Look! Powdered sugar on the outside, yellow fluffy cake on the inside, and a layer of cream in the middle. You have to try one!”
Once more, anger rose behind Celestia’s eyes. “Sun cakes? And whose idea were these?”
Pinkie giggled, putting the platter aside. “Mine, of course. See, Clockwork came in one day and said the Many Moons Vigil sounded boring, so she told me to come up with sun and moon themed desserts. So, I did! Ponies love them so much, I think I’ll get the Cake’s to add them to the menu!”
Celestia nodded. “Right. You mentioned Clockwork. Have you seen her around lately?”
Poking her own cheek with a hoof, Pinkie hummed for a moment. “I think I saw her about thirty minutes ago. Or was it five minutes ago? I dunno. It’s hard to keep track sometimes. She was over by Rarity’s booth, handing out the neato robes. I got the Luna robe, cause I love partying all night long!” Pinkie explained, showing off her brand new attire.
“Dark blue suits you well, Pinkie Pie,” Luna said with a giggle.
“Thanks! It looks better on you, though,” the pink pony said, a beaming smile gracing her features.
Luna waved her off with a chuckle. “You’re such a flatterer.”
“Next festival,” Pinkie began, “I hear that they plan to do a lookalike contest. Whoever looks the most like Luna will be the winner! Big Macintosh is an early favorite, but I bet with the right coat dye, Rarity could pull out a win.”
Having grown tired of their banter, Celestia started off further into the crowd. She had gone only a few hoofsteps before a familiar grip gave her pause. She turned only to face her sister’s worried gaze.
“Sister. These ponies may not see your agitation, but I do. What is the matter?”
Spinning around, Celestia forced herself to smile even harder. “Nothing is the matter, little sister. Please, enjoy yourself. I simply have a matter to attend to.”
“Okay,” Luna relented, letting go of Celestia’s hoof. “but I want you to tell me later why I’m just now hearing of this holiday.”
“O-of course,” Celestia said with a nod, eager to steer herself away from the subject.
Free of her sister and the excitable ponies that were loitering in town, Celestia started looking around for the pony whose name had now been burned into her mind. She checked at the castle, Clockwork’s home, and every booth in town square. Using logic, she decided to check the one place a repair pony should be at such an event.
Standing behind the clock tower right in front of it’s doors was the pony occupying so much of her mind.
“Clockwork.”
Hearing her name, The earth pony turned around and waved, smiling around that mask of hers. “Hi, Princess Celestia! Having fun?”
Instantly, Celestia’s smile vanished.
“We need to talk.”
Clockwork’s body slammed through the half open clock tower door and rolled across the floor until she hit the far wall. A brilliant flash of white behind her eyes blurred her vision, painfully so. She struggled to catch her breath, having just had the wind knocked out of her. The ringing in her ears finally started to fade, giving way to ominous hoofsteps. Celestia marched forward, her visage one of pure rage. Fire seemed to blaze in her eyes, and her mane whipped violently, despite the lack of wind. Like a newborn foal, Clockwork struggled to rise to her hooves until a searing pain in her right rear hoof caused her to collapse with a sharp cry.
“Ni-Nice talk,” she stammered.
A golden aura wrapped around her throat, effortlessly lifting the earth pony into the air. Pained gasps escaped her windpipe as Celestia planted her against the wall.
“Did you think your meddling would be cute? Changing this sacred vigil, dressing the townsponies up in glorified bath robes, decorating the town, inviting my sister? You have greatly overstepped your station!”
Flecks of saliva squeezed out between Clockwork’s lips and her mask. Try as she might, she just couldn’t get a decent breath through her windpipe while the enraged monarch kept her grip. Clawing at the aura around her neck, she struggled to breathe as darkness began swallowing her vision.
“Do you think that toy you’re wearing will save you? When I am finished, you’ll wake up hundreds of miles from here with a decade of physical therapy ahead of you! You foolish litt-”
Screeching metal interrupted Celestia’s tirade. The clock tower door, now twisted in half, flew across the room, embedding itself in the wall.
“Release her this instant, sister!”
The aura vanished and Clockwork fell to the ground. She greedily sucked in air, pushing the encroaching blackness away. In that moment, she saw a look of pure terror in Celestia’s eyes.
“Luna! I… this isn’t… you’re not supposed to be here!” Celestia sputtered.
The younger alicorn bore down upon her sister, her face twisted in anger. “Why not? So you can assault our subjects with impunity?!”
Celestia stared at the ground in shame. “I never meant for this to happen. I jus-”
“Silence!”
Luna’s instruction was crystal clear, and was obeyed as such. Ignoring her sister, she walked over to Clockwork, whose breathing had only just returned to normal. Kneeling down, she put a hoof beneath Clockwork’s chin and raised her head until their eyes met.
“Clockwork, I’m so sorry. I knew my sister was upset, but I never imagined she would do this. Are you alright?”
Clockwork shook her head, tears gathering at the corner of her eyes. “No. My hoof... it hurts when I put weight on it.”
Wrapping a hoof around Clockwork, Luna shushed her. “It’s okay, my little pony. It’s likely just a sprain, but we’ll find a doctor to be sure. I just have to deal with something, okay?”
Through her tears, Clockwork nodded and that was all Luna needed. Standing up to her full height, she turned back to her sister. “While you were tracking down your, prey, I spent some time talking with the ponies about this ‘Many Moons Vigil’ of yours. What I heard disturbed me greatly, until I saw this. This shameful act definitely wins out.”
Tears fell freely from Celestia’s eyes. Her lips quivered and her knees wobbled until she finally fell to her haunches as a choked sob escaped her throat. “You were never supposed to know!”
“Why not?!” Luna shouted. “So you could keep forcing ponies to attend my funeral? I’m here, sister! Not trapped millions of miles away! Why are you so intent on doing this?”
Celestia sat on the ground, broken and ashamed. Any vestige of stoicism or composure vanished. The once proud ruler was now reduced to a blubbering mess.
“Luna! I can’t just forget it! I can’t forget what I did to you! Don’t you see?”
Luna stared at her sister, her eyes searing holes into her. All of a sudden, it clicked. A serene picture of understanding finally graced Luna’s face. “Yes, I do see it now. I had the tantabus, you have your vigil.” Opening her wings, Luna grabbed her older sister tight and held her in a protective embrace. “Sister… let this be the night that the vigil ends. Let this be the night that you forgive yourself. Twilight and her friends showed me that I didn’t need to punish myself any longer. Now, her friends are holding out their hooves, offering you the same chance.”
Raising Celestia’s head, Luna looked her in the eyes with a gentle smile. “Please, take it. Forgive yourself as I did. Free yourself of these shackles.”
Burying her head in Luna’s chest, Celestia’s sobs grew stronger. Luna gently rocked in place while embracing her older sister. There was a morbid beauty to the affair that Clockwork couldn’t quite put her hoof on. In a way, she felt privileged to see the two major rulers of Equestria in such a vulnerable state. She might have felt better about it, if it didn’t cost her an injured hoof.
“Clockwork? Are you in here?”
A welcome voice lifted Clockwork’s spirits. “Twilight! Over here!” she choked out.
Twilight Sparkle ran through the open doorway, only slowing as she neared the pair of sisters, each holding one another. Luna gave a nod toward Clockwork which Twilight returned. Galloping over to the injured mare, Twilight knelt down beside her.
“Clockwork, what in Equestria happened?”
Slowly, Clockwork rose to her hooves, careful not to put weight on her injured hoof.
“Yo-you know me. Ju-just angering the Mad Solar God is all. Luna thinks I sprained my hoof.”
Twilight lifted the mare carefully with her magic, gently placing Clockwork across her back “Here, let’s go find a doctor. We still have a couple hours before the clock tower chimes. We should be done in plenty of time.”
As Twilight helped carry Clockwork out the tower, the earth pony couldn’t help but lock eyes once more with Celestia, her eyes filled with tears. Try as she might, instead of anger, the only thing she felt for the princess was pity.
Clockwork stared at the clock tower, her eyes fixed upon its face.
“I should be in there.”
A purple hoof reached across her shoulder. “It’s going to be fine. You said you tested everything earlier.”
Tapping her hooves together, Clockwork whined. “I know, Twilight, but that was before I mounted the bells. I mean, the bells shouldn’t change anything since I tested the chiming mechanism, but they might not work. Oh, and don’t get me started on the spotlight...”
Twilight sighed and leaned against Clockwork. Together they sat on a picnic blanket, a good distance from the crowd of ponies gathered beneath the tower. After the incident with Celestia, they found a doctor that confirmed Luna’s suspicions. After providing Clockwork with a brace and some meds, he went back to the festival, eager to take part in the newly transformed holiday.
“You’ve been quiet for awhile, Sparkles. What’s wrong?”
Slowly, Twilight’s gaze lowered to the ground. “I can’t believe Princess Celestia did that. She had to be… furious. I didn’t know she could even be that mad. She always seemed so calm, so measured.”
Clockwork shrugged. “It’s her sister. We always get a little crazy when it comes to the ponies we love. Don’t you have a brother or sister?”
“A brother,” Twilight said, a grin forming on her lips. “He’s a goof. He always made time for me, shared everything with me.”
“Wouldn’t you go a little nuts if somepony messed with your brother?” Clockwork asked.
“A little? I’d uproot half of Equestria if I had to. He’s my BBBFF.”
“Huh?”
Twilight turned and smiled. “Big Brother Best Friend Forever.”
A chant from the crowd caught both ponies attention.
“Ten second mark,” Twilight said. “You ready for this?”
Clockwork put her front hooves together in prayer. “Please let it work, please let it work, please let it work!”
The shouting in the crowd slowly began meshing together, until their voices finally synced up.
“Three, two, one!”
A light switched on in the clock tower, beaming through its stained glass face. In the glass was an image of Celestia and Luna, the sun and moon hanging above each of their heads. The bells began to chime, their tones loud and melodious, carrying a joyful tune throughout the town. The crowd gathered around the tower cheered, their whooping and hollering carrying for what seemed like miles. In the midst of it all, a small sigh of relief escaped Clockwork’s lips. A gentle hoof nudged her in the side.
“Told you it would be fine.”
Clockwork snuggled up to Twilight, her head resting upon the alicorn’s strong chest. “Don’t ruin the moment, Sparklebutt.”
The festival had come and gone without much of a hitch. Everyone involved agreed it was an order of magnitude more enjoyable than it was as a vigil. With Celestia and Luna’s blessing, the vigil was officially renamed the Moonlight Festival, a counterpart to the Summer Sun Celebration and was scheduled for a yearly basis, rather than every five years. Upon Celestia’s insistence, she would have no representation at the festival from this point forward. This holiday would be Luna’s time to shine, and it would be celebrated all across Equestria, rather than just Ponyville.
Ponies soon abandoned the streets, setting off to their homes to go sleep off the food and fun they had just indulged in. Only a few ponies remained outside to wrap up their unfinished business. One of those ponies hobbled along, still slightly impeded by a sprained hoof.
Between the brace and the medicine, Clockwork had little trouble getting around, albeit at a slower pace. On the outskirts of Ponyville, she approached a pony sitting beneath a tree, staring out into the stars. Swallowing her fear, Clockwork walked over and sat down next to her.
“Dining on ashes?”
Celestia turned to face her, a mostly empty bottle of wine held aloft by her magic. “There’s a lot to sift through. One doesn’t live a thousand years without their fair share of failures. I’m surprised you came to see me. You’re not afraid of the, ‘Mad Solar God’?”
Laying back onto the grass, Clockwork worked her head left to right, as if making a choice. “No… and yes. I guess. I mean, it was frightening, but I know why you did it.”
At this, Celestia raised a brow. “Oh really? You think that terrible display was justified?”
“No. I didn’t say that. I just know why you did it. Your sister means a lot to you.”
Taking another sip from her bottle, Celestia sighed. Her cheeks were red, flushed from the alcohol and embarrassment. “Yes, well I guess you would be well versed in the loss of a sibling. Tell me, would you be interested in having an honor few ponies can ever claim to have?”
“I’m dating Twilight right now, if that’s where you’re going,” Clockwork said with a chuckle.
“No, no. I’m far too old to be interested in such things. I just wanted some advice. How did you deal with losing your brother?”
Clockwork’s amber eyes traced along the stars in the sky. Silently, she ran through everything that led her up to this moment. All of the hardship, the pain, the fear. It wasn’t something she could just put into words, but she decided she could give it a shot.
“Well, if you’re me, you go to a therapist. They tell you it wasn’t your fault. Then you read a bunch of books that tell you how it totally wasn’t your fault and there was nothing you could do and that you need to accept it. Then you get up one day and you tear those books apart. You feel sorry for yourself, you blame yourself, you blame others. You laugh, you cry, you do all the wrong things.”
Clockwork’s tone changed, as if she were recalling something from long, long ago. She sat up and stared at the clocktower in the distance. “You look at the world as it continues to spin. You wanna just run outside and grab the whole planet and make it stop. You want to shake the ponies in the street and scream. How dare they carry on as if nothing happened? How dare the world continue to spin while you sit there, unable to move. Then you wake up one day, and you take a step forward. You look down at your hooves and you block the whole world out until it’s just you looking down at your hooves… and then you take another step forward. At some point, you just keep stepping until you start living again.”
“I see. Not quite the answer I was looking for,” Celestia said with a long drawn out sigh.
Clockwork shook her head. “No. It’s not the same. My brother is never coming back. Your sister came back, and while you’re eternally grateful for that, you can’t look at her without thinking about how you failed to protect her.” Clockwork tilted her head. “That about right?”
A small crease formed at the edge of Celestia’s mouth. “Yeah. That more or less sums it up. Tell me, do you ever languish on that fateful day? Think about what you would or could have done differently?”
Laying back on the grass, Clockwork rested her hooves behind her head.
“I could have worn my choker, I could have moved before father hit me, let’s see… helped my brother fight my father off, run between them to try and stop the fight, hit my father from behind—”
“Most of those are either impossible, or would have ended poorly for you,” Celestia pointed out.
“I know,” Clockwork admitted. “It doesn’t stop my mind from considering them. ‘Intrusive thoughts’, my therapist called them. I know what’s done is done, but now and then, those thoughts just come back.”
A faint smile played on Celestia’s lips. “Ah, yes, the castle therapist. Good old Psychosis.” Celestia chuckled. “Remember when he thought you were mute from the incident and he kept pestering you until you finally said something?”
“All too well.” Clockwork rolled her eyes.
“He went on a month long hiatus after that. Said it was a life changing experience. He even saw a therapist of his own afterwards.”
“Yeah, I think he ended up burning that chair. Something about some stains never washing out. He was a good pony, though. Just a bit stuffy. He got upset when I resorted his books alphabetically.”
Both ponies sat in the relative silence of the night. Then, like a ripple in water, It started as a small giggle. That giggle soon turned into a chuckle, and then full blown laughter as Celestia fell back onto the dew soaked grass.
“Something funny, Your Highness?” Clockwork asked, frowning at the celestia monarch.
Celestia’s laughter softened. “I couldn’t understand it at first, but now I know why Twilight likes you so much. You’re a meddler!”
Clockwork gasped, her cheeks puffing out in defiance. “What? I am not!”
“Yes you are,” Celestia retorted between chuckles. “You just can’t leave something alone. You have to get your hooves dirty and fix everything, even if you shouldn’t.”
“Th-that’s not entirely true…”
“Oh really? How long were you here before you stole Rarity’s sewing machine?”
“W-well—”
“Be honest. Remember that Twilight tells me everything,” Celestia pointed out, waggling her nearly empty wine bottle at the mare.
Sitting up, Clockwork crossed her hooves and grumbled. “Okay, fine. I have a bad habit of sticking my nose where it doesn’t belong. Happy?”
Celestia’s eyes returned to the starry sky. “After tonight… yes, I am. Being a meddler isn’t necessarily a bad thing. A wise pony once said, ‘For evil to triumph, all that is necessary is for good ponies to do nothing.’.”
“I haven’t heard that one in ages.”
“Twilight is also a meddler. She can’t stand for anything to be out of its proper place, nor can she turn her back when there is something to be set straight. I used to look at her and shake my head, unable to tell her that the world couldn’t simply be fixed just because she wished it so. Watching her made me realize how many opportunities to better the world I let slip by, simply because I thought it impossible to change it. Which is the bigger fool: the pony who fails to change the world, or the one who never tries?”
Clockwork shrugged. “You never know until you try.”
“And what did that effort earn you?” Celestia asked, turning to face Clockwork. “A vicious attack from an emotionally unbalanced ‘Mad Solar God’. It reminds me of that time with Twilight, all those years ago.”
Upon hearing Twilight’s name, Clockwork’s ears perked up. “Whazzat about Twilight?”
Celestia’s eyes moved back to the night sky. “One day after class, Twilight came running to me positively bawling. You have to remember, she was but a filly then, and she was panicking so much that I couldn’t exactly make out what she was trying to tell me. She pulled on my hooves and dragged me into the royal garden. With the way she was acting, I was expecting to find a dying guard, or perhaps an injured visitor. Instead, she led me to a lizard.”
Clockwork raised an eyebrow. “A lizard?”
“Yes. Just your garden variety lizard. You know the type. About two inches long, green, and when threatened, they push out a pocket of red from beneath their mouth to warn other lizards away.”
Clockwork giggled. “Oh yeah, I know those. My brother used to catch them and poke them until they opened their mouth. Then he’d put them on his ear and walk around until they let go.”
“Twilight’s lizard was not as lucky. The one she led me to had been crushed. Once I calmed her down, she explained that she was trying to catch it so she could study one up close. However, as you know, Twilight is a very powerful pony. Even when she was just a filly, she was quite strong. It was with a heavy heart that I gave Twilight her first lesson about death. When I explained to her what she had done, she cried even harder than before, the poor thing.”
Clockwork shook her head. “I guess it must be rough. To know that you have all that power and that a single slip up, one mistake, and you can do some serious damage… it’s gotta be hard.”
“Indeed. Once I calmed her down, we gave that lizard the best burial any lizard could ever ask for. That lesson on power and its careless misuse stayed with her quite awhile. For weeks, her magic studies suffered because she was afraid to lose control. Tonight, it seems I was due for a similar lesson.”
Clockwork sat up and offered Celestia her good hoof. “L-listen, it’s no big deal, really. Your sister means a lot to you. I came in and started messing with stuff and you lashed out. It’s only natural. Don’t beat yourself up over it.”
Taking the offered hoof, Celestia used it to pull herself up. She stumbled a bit, trying to find her balance.
“A little too much wine, Your Highness?”
“Of course not. I’ve... just been sitting down too long.” Celestia’s denial wasn’t very convincing in light of the crimson stain on her cheeks and the almost-empty bottle of wine.
“Whatever you say, Your Highness. Is it safe for you to fly drunk? What if you crash into somepony’s garden?” Clockwork teased.
A long smirk graced the monarch’s lips. “Then perhaps I’ll sleep among the roses.”
With a chuckle, Clockwork shook her head. “Just watch out for the thorns. Good night, Princess Celestia.”
The princess said nothing, she simply watched as the earth pony hobbled away. Once Clockwork was out of sight, she raised her bottle of wine into the air.
“Here’s to you, Clockwork. To think I was worried you wouldn’t be worthy of being Twilight’s partner. Guess I still have much to learn after all these years.”
Downing the rest of the bottle, Celestia spread her wings and began a clumsy trot which eventually took her into the night sky.
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I subscribe to the philosophy of emotional suppression until you just stop feeling attachment and such, but Clocks advice works too
You know , that would be the perfect situation for Twillight to use Celestia's patented "I am not angry , just disappointed" on her own mentor for a change. (Because she is a good pony. Truthfully , she has all the reasons in the world to be furious.)
Yes , there are reasons as to why Celestia did that, and as far as I am concerned , even a hoof to the face (Clockwork's , that is ) would have been okay , if shameful behaviour. Here tho , she basically assaulted someone unprovoked , strangled them to near loss of consciousness (which can leave lasting damage) , threatened them with years long physical and/or emotional trauma (and I believe she intended to deliver , given the strangling above) , and to add insult to injury (litteraly , in that case) , basically mocked a disabled person over their disability (not to mention , to strangle someone that has a tube in their windpipe in the first place , she must have used crushing force).
She got off very fucking lightly , and Twilight , Luna and Clockwork herself had very good reasons to tear her a new one. I hope that still happen really , even if ponies are too forgiving for their own good.
oh, Celestia don't you know? there's no such thing as impossible
How is the brown note a source of intrigue and comedy?
9337918
Agreed. Celestia basically had a psychotic break there. At minimum someone should have recommended anger management therapy or similar.
I don't know, I think Celestia was being rather out-of-character here. I understand the reasons behind her actions, but I don't think it at all relates to how she is in the show, despite your descriptions of her very rarely getting angry. And Twilight, while concerned for Clockwork's health first-and-foremost, didn't seem to want to admonish Celestia at all for what she did to her marefriend.
...And seriously, what would Clockwork's mom say to Celestia if she found out?
Oh boy, I knew this would be the chapter that would be the most controversial.
I’ll address what I can separately, then address the moment together at the end.
9337918
I thought about that moment, but I didn’t use it for three reasons:
1. I felt it would drag the reader out of the moment. Taking lines directly from the show like that does it to me. It’s why I rarely do it.
2. Clockwork basically defuses the situation for Celestia.
3. Then I’d have to go into another mini-arc where Twilight and Celestia have to resolve their issues.
You’re right about them being too forgiving though. I think it’s simply a byproduct of their society. It’s worked for them, so why should they stop?
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Page turner wouldn’t say anything to Celestia. She would just glare, and then glare some more. Only once Celestia was on the floor begging for forgiveness would she relent and ask her what she learned.
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The overarching theme of the story is siblings. I believe if you want to make Celestia flip her shit, the only way to do it would be through Luna. Likewise, the only one to bring her back from that would be Luna. The only reason Clockwork could forgive Celestia for doing this, would be because she knows the loss of a sibling, and how important they were to her. The only reason Twilight doesn’t hold more of a grudge, is because Clockwork isn’t. That’s not to say that Twilight holds no qualms about the attack, just that she’s listening to Clockwork’s explanation.
This entire incident is Celestia’s version of the tantabus. She never forgave herself for that thousand year gap. She let it fester and stew until the right pony came along and popped it.
I knew writing this chapter would be taking a chance, but I still feel strongly in the decision, and if you don’t like it, well, I’m certainly not going to tell you you’re wrong. I still like it, and I still stand by it. I want to see more failure, more loss of control from the princesses like we get from the mane 6 (or 7, or 8, or whatever they’re up to now.) and I want to see them confront it. It also shows that no matter how old we get, no matter how far we’ve come, we can all learn new lessons.
Plus, I got Celestia drunk. If that isn’t a win, I don’t know what is.
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I don’t dislike it but I mostly just view it as odd that more concern from all parties isn’t directed at the possibility of future episodes. If she became that heated because of another ponies disrespect towards the nightmare moon event I would at least be concerned that she might react equally poorly to slander in a newspaper or something.
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I don’t think she would attack or go after someone over nightmare moon. Now, if a paper or tabloid printed something malicious against Luna, she might, at the very least, send a strongly worded letter. Of course, she also has a castle full of staff, and now Luna in particular, to help calm her down. What Clockwork did was a bit more personal.
That would be a good short fic. The castle staff and Luna try to hide the day’s newspaper from Celestia, going to increasingly outlandish efforts to keep any and all copies from her. If I didn’t have so much on my plate already, I’d write it.
celestia the powder keg
i like this
The more I re-read this chapter, the less comfortable I get, and I think I see why.
Clockwork's dad, someone she more-or-less trusted, physically attacked her, unprovoked, and assaulted her. Celestia did the same here. Yes, you could say that Clockwork's actions at changing the festival were provocation, but no more so than what "provoked" her dad. Her dad verbally abused her while physically assaulting her. Celestia did as well. Her dad would've caused irreparable harm to her had a third party (her brother) not intervened. Her father would've followed through on his threats. The same with Celestia here. Had Luna not intervened, Celestia may have crippled her and effectively banished her. True, once Twilight found out, the banishment would've ended and then there'd be a huge rift between the princesses, but the threat still would've been carried out.
...I'm having trouble distinguishing the difference between Celestia's actions and the action's of Clockwork's father.
And I'm left to wonder if that wouldn't bring up episodes of PTSD in Clockwork?
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The difference is that Clockwork’s father had a more sinister motive. He was grooming her to basically be sold off for money and influence. Knowing that her voice would be a problem, he forced her to wear a magical artifact that constantly caused her pain. His abuse came unprovoked over years of abuse, and the only time it stopped ended with the death of her brother.
Celestia has done none of these things. In fact if you’ll remember, Celestia was the one who paid off her father’s debt and gave her mother a job at the castle library. Clockwork made these changes to the vigil due to impulsive behavior that Luna warned her about after the dream she had. The only reasons she can forgive Celestia for this is because it was over her sister, and because of the things she’s done for her and her mother. Any other reason and she wouldn’t forgive her. Not in the slightest.
Abuse is intentional and compulsive. Mistakes aren’t, and Clockwork knows the difference.
Once Celestia had grabbed a hold of Clockwork, I think that Twilight being the one to try and calm her down might have had more impact. Twi probably hanging out near the clock tower would have responded first. She could see the 'eternally calm' Celestia actually mad enough at a pony to choke them. Celestia and Twilight could have had a small argument with Luna coming in to check the commotion. Twily helping her marefriend against her own mentor. However, your the author and what's done is done, and done very well. :) =x Looks like I was right on previous chapter comment about 'being room on the sun.' Hope to see more soon.
Fallout?
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It was the title of the last chapter I posted. Unfortunately, it wasn’t well received and I’ve decided to pull it for now for quality reasons. After I work on it some more, I’ll put it back up. Sorry for the inconvenience!
238,900 miles.
"Hundreds of thousands" or "A quarter million" would work and be accurate, and I think accuracy would better underscore how they still bear the scars from the keen edge of her banishment.
As far as actual writing decisions goes? Celestia's raw strength makes this seem unlikely. She's angry enough to physically attack someone with the force to send them flying, but holds back enough that they probably won't die?
No, that part about the lizard is far more apt. If Celestia lost control enough that she was willing to lash out, then she would be lacking in control. She'd be more likely to bring the building down on Clockwork than send her flying with a simple blast.
Celestia lashing out in rage and the target surviving only really works if there's something to soak most of her power, like Twilight or Luna intervening.