• Member Since 14th Mar, 2016
  • offline last seen Nov 3rd, 2021

Lil Penpusher

Put the Words in the Bag and nopony gets hurt

Comments ( 39 )

Not unlikely, considering it's based in the Equestria at War Universe 🤔

Their is nothing wrong with having a military to defend the nation so long as you do not use that military to force conquere others. threats wanting to attack let them come if your military is ready and then threaten that you can invade them once their armies are defeated. You do not even have to invade the other nations but show you can. Equestra dose not need to attack other nations to surive it has to simply outlast the undead armies coming and the nations that want to attack equestria and do not see the undead are gonna wiped them out too. Really celestia took the whole thing the wrong way having a strong iarmy is good to have peace of harmony ready be ready for war and to take up arms to defend your home, that makes sense but Celestia failed to see she could done this the right way yes the foolish ponies who wanted her off the thone is bad cause and their is a risk of a rebellion but deal with it fight as you can and shut down the rebellion till the rebels are at last defeated including the traitors in stalliongrad.
Had celestia not become daybreaker and found a way to deal with all the problems instead of going to the nightmare personallity she would have a way to deal with the problems she is facing even if it seems hard and impossible to see it at first also I thoguth Luna became nightmare moon again what happen that got her sent to the underworld I get the feeling she be back. And when this war ends and the undead are defeated and all the nations I supect are in ruins and barly able to recover Celestia might get blamed for the whole mess of the wars and other nations well be sharing the blame as they all had a hand in the lost of peace and harmony, their are. ways to maintain peace and harmony have an army always ready to protect it and show you can fight back.

While this may all seem reasonable to us, you gotta understand the perspective of Celestia and Ponies in general. They've literally been pacifists for DECADES. Longer than that even. Pacifism was so deep-rooted, it essentially propped up the entire Nation of Equestria itself (among other important values, obviously). Before the Changelings invaded Equestria in this Universe, thus starting a massive Total War between both races, there simply was no middle ground, and often times not even a militarist voice to begin with. Ponies lived in Peace, and saw no reason to change that. When the War began, Equestria struggled to patch together some hap hazardous fighting force to hold back the Changeling advance, but with great lack of success and massive loss of pony life.

In the end, I wanted to portray Daybreaker as not some one-dimensional Villain who grew insane and started killing people for killing's sake. Celestia became Daybreaker because Celestia's mentality simply saw no other way to protect her Ponies anymore. To her, it made sense to become Daybreaker. It streamlined Decisionmaking, established (relative) Order and Stability in a Nation that found itself in the middle of a defensive war which it was completely unprepared for and ensured that Equestria would be throwing everything it had, Kitchen sink included, at Chrysalis before surrendering. There would be no more lack of recruits, as Daybreaker formally introduced Conscription to not just fill the gaps but expand them.

I deliberately wanted to make her Character controversial in nature, because she's right in many ways, but at the same time she isn't. In the end, it's yours to decide.

Yeah they were pacfist and that is bad cause it meants outsiders will it as a chance to come and attack also yes to celestia she thought being daybreaker is gonna fix the whole thing but its not those who remeber having an Equestria as it was is not wrong so long as you are ready to fight to protect it. Protecting your home and family and for freedom is worth fighting for. Daybreaker is going to see have to deal with the tratiors whom are ponies who want to be able to live and enjoy the peace of what was but are willing to die fighting for it even cause I am sure their will be ponies who will believe that proecting Equestria is one thing but forcing them to worship daybreaker and killing ponies both within equestria and outside of equestria in their own nations for being free is wrong.

But Luna I thought became nightmare moon what happen that got her sent to the underworld by daybreaker what another scism between the two sisters like before happen accept they could agree to one which of them was to be worshiped who the highest and the true leader? or did Luna wake up to the fact that this was wrong and that their is a better way to save Equestria? If so I am sure she be back and it be up to her to fix what daybreaker destroyed. Also hopefully the tratiors in stalliongrad get what is coming to them casue their idealogly is gonna bring down and weaken the nations to undead hordes. And what happen to flurryheart?

War, War Never Changes.
The Future of Warfare's Begun.
Great War Rages.

"I will not repeat these mistakes again. I will stomp out ANY who oppose me! I am Empress, I am Harmony! And if they do not bow before me, the God-Empress of the Sun-"

Aaaaaaand we went down the right hand side of the focus tree. Was honestly expecting it, but hoping for the left.

It's actually a mixture of both God-Empress (right) and Empress-Protector (left). To the outside world she appears like (and calls herself) God-Empress, but in reality her motivations are much more akin to the Protector path

Hard to enjoy this when Celestia becomes no better than everything the show stands against. All for no real reason other than "Fuck it. Because I can."

There's a reason Tyrantlestia stories are a nich in this fandom.

Not sure if you haven't read the story in its entirety, perhaps you only skimmed over it, but there's actually plenty of reasoning and motives given as to why Celestia gave in and became Daybreaker.

At first I was like, "Huh, finally Twilight is beginning to see mercy."

And then I was like, "Oh."

I understand the villain, but that doesn't mean I agree with her. Like Thanos.

Coincidentally, Thanos was a big inspiration for me as to how I wanted to write Daybreaker and her character. :twilightsmile:

And shining??? she murdered his wife

Ah, similar to the Elements of Harmony being absent from this story arc, Shining Armour is...

a story for another time


I read the whole thing. Just to see if I could agree with them. I didn't. Plus it didn't help you turned Twilight into Daybreaker's bitch with no mind of her own and is just too blind to see the truth.

This is everything that Twilight stands against.

I'm perfectly fine with you not agreeing to her motives, that's fine. Some people will tend to agree to them, some will disagree and others may wager themselves somewhere in the middle ground. However, you keep saying things that make me thing you skipped important passages of this story.

Twilight was corrupted by Daybreaker's magic and thus became Sunrise Sparkle, or as you elegantly put it, 'Daybreaker's bitch'. There's even a reason given as to why Daybreaker does this in the first place instead of just blowing Twilight up or something.

But again, Twilight is far from being a mindless slave under Daybreaker. She regularly reconsiders her options and questions her actions and morals, though the corruption that has taken hold of her always defeats her concience. The only time that Twilight begins to actively defeat Sunrise is when Cadence actively attempts to free her from the evil spell.

I read those parts. I still don't have to buy into them.

Then that's fine. Sorry for seeming a bit overzealous there, wasn't intended :twilightblush:

Oh no. I get an author defending what they wrote. And at least you're being mature about it. Can't say the same who downvote a comment just because I don't share what some think.

Or that's what I feel anyway.

Eh, I'd honestly rather see people downvote a comment to share their opinion than bust in and cause a giant fuss. Oh well.

C'est la vie.

Now they have to deal with the undead armies that are coming. which will be an even harder fight.

"And if you win? What will you do?"

"...I'll watch the sun rise on a grateful Equestria."

Looking forward to seeing more from this series. I've been toying around with an idea similar to this ever since I started playing EAW (about six months ago). Not sure if I should do it now though. I doubt it would match this in terms of quality.

Heh, thanks for the high praise, but don't be discouraged! Writing is all materialising your thoughts and ideas, so don't let me stop you from that. I wasn't the first one to write about Daybreaker either, that didn't stop me from writing something great and unique :twilightsmile:

Best of luck to you and your endeavours!

I may have missed it [because I'm just that perceptive :derpytongue2: ] what is the final fate of the other members of the six?

And did Daybreaker corrupt Spike too? is that why he's not trying to restore Twilight to normal?

I have some ideas for a fourth installment of this Series in which most of that would be explored and explained. A bit on the backburner for now, though. :twilightsheepish:

What's going to happen to Luna?

I know I am a bit late for this but I finally managed to read all 3 stories and I just want to say they are all really amazing. I especially like how you managed to write Daybreaker in such a way that I couldn't really tell if she was a tyrant or a hero or a combination between the 2. Even tho Cadence's role was smaller I still think you wrote her perfectly, kind and caring but also very loyal to her beliefs. Finally I really enjoyed your depiction of Twilight/Sunrise Sparkle, they way she is split between her loyalty to Daybreaker and her loyalty to Cadence was really great to read.

This series got me thinking: how far should freedom be oppressed in the name of 'for the survival of the country'? How much should one's rights be limited under the emergency of war? What is the line that defines what is acceptable for a government fighting in a war?

Celestia changed into Daybreaker for the survival of her nation. She lost herself to the madness and tragedy of the Great Changeling War, trading pacifism and friendship for militaristic strength and tyrannical leadership. She ruthlessly oppressed those who opposed her way of ruling while leading Equestria to victory. She sent millions of ponies to war, making them fight against the changelings as both Equestrians and changelings died in millions. She caused thousands of Equestrians and Crystal Ponies to die and slaughtered the Princess of Love, the leader of the Crystal Empire. All in the name of survival, harmony, and order, twisted to fit the purpose of Daybreaker.

But was all of this necessary? The slaughtering of ponies just because there were rumors? The civil war against the Crystal Empire, sending troops to fight in the snow and mud? The killing of Princess Cadence, effectively cutting off the head of the Empire? These actions were done in the name of protecting the order Daybreaker had created, preserving the ever-so-fragile harmony of hers... and yet they seem to have been overkill. Daybreaker could have gone to the Crystal Empire in the first place, make one last attempt at negotiating the Princess of Love. Cadence and Twilight Sparkle were rebonding, and Daybreaker could have used that to make peace terms with the Crystal Empire, although this last bit may be a bit of a stretch.

Celestia wanted to ensure ponykind's survival, and in the process became a villain that no one can defend for, a monster that can't be stopped. An oppressive tyrant that mercilessly purged those opposing her, a ruthless empress that showed no mercy towards her enemies. And yet... for some reason, I, in the very least, can't blame her for her actions. Nor is there anyone else responsible for her fall. As she said herself, she chose to survive even if she became a monster. And she took Twilight with her.

Twilight, or rather, Sunrise Sparkle... I see bits of the old Twilight even when she says that she is Sunrise Sparkle. She has her memories, talks like the old Twilight, greatly fears failing her tutor, and even loves Cadence and Shining Armor just like she used to. The only difference is now that she's become a fanatic for Daybreaker, serving her without question. She goes as far as to kill ponies without questioning, just to make sure she doesn't fail Daybreaker. And that is what makes Twilight the villain here; she commits war crimes without hesitating just because Daybreaker told her to. Yet, it is the fact that I see the old Twilight in her makes me unable to give up on her. I genuinely hoped for a moment that Cadence would be able to snap Twilight out of it with her "Sunshine and Ladybugs" chant, just before getting slapped in the face with Cadence's death.

All in all, Daybreaker and Sunrise Sparkle are clearly the evil ones here, the ones who are responsible for so many deaths, both pony and changeling. Under normal circumstances, these two would be punished heavily; most likely a hanging if it were our world. But, even after the war, things are quite unlikely to be normal ever again. After all, the Sun hasn't set in years, Twilight's been doing her 'Grand Inquisitor' stuff ever since Daybreaker came into being, and Daybreaker most likely still has her twisted image of what harmony is.

And, just like Luna asked, what now? The war's over, the changelings have fled or have surrendered, and the world has seen the Solar Empire's might. There's no one to challenge the Solar Empire now, as it stands as the sole superpower. Not even the Crystal Empire can challenge it; the Crystal Empire was over the moment Daybreaker slashed Cadence's throat. And, therefore, I demand the author the following: MOAR! :flutterrage:

This was an excellent series to read, Penpusher. It's stories that make me think like these three that I definitely love. Fimfiction needs more of stories like these and less mindless clop. Though, I really wish to know what happens after this. What will happen to Luna? To the rest of the Mane 6? To Shining Armor and Flurry Heart(if she exists in this universe)? To the countless nameless soldiers who managed to return from the battlefield, the weight of the war heavy on their shoulders for the rest of their lives?

Thanks for reading this long unintended review, and thanks for bringing us this series!


MOAR :flutterrage:

An Epilogue is in the works, actually. Will take a while though, since I want to get it right and have already scrapped my progress and general setting/POV twice now :twilightsmile:

Thanks for the kind, encouraging words though! I love it when people take the time to think about the deeper meaning of these kinds of stories, and it was certainly an intent of mine to make both Twilight and Daybreaker morally grey characters. They're terrible Ponies doing terrible things, killing thousands and millions... but you can't blame them for most of it. After all, can a Pacifist Society really outwit and outlast a militaristic and violent one like the Changelings in the face of Total War? Surely occupation by the Changelings would lead to a death toll far greater than the one caused by Daybreaker, and the destruction of Equestria itself would be unacceptable to begin with, as all its history, character and values would go down the anals of history with it.

But you could argue Equestria is dead, as is. The Solar Empire killed it and replaced it, reforging its values and twisting them into authoritarian propaganda tools. Harmony in Order, Strength in Unity, Friendship in Comradery and Joy in Obedience. And for all it's worth... most Ponies, even those who question Daybreaker, did not oppose her during the War. Preserving Equestria and Ponykind was a greater goal. In the end, if you were to overthrow Daybreaker during the war... would there be an Equestria to come back to, as the Changelings use the opportunity to strike back?

The Great War was supposed to be the final war for supremacy. Complete Changeling Hegemony, or the final defeat of Chrysalis and her forces for good. But Daybreaker has, in a way, caused the final battle to shift. The Great War itself was no longer the final battle, as it were.

The real battle would have to occur after the War. When disgruntled Veterans return home, when torn apart Families grief the ones they lost in the war and when Ponies finally have time and opportunity to think again. Because Peace means lack of a common enemy. And with the lack of such, Ponies will begin to think and question things. Question Daybreaker and her rule.

The Final Battle would not be that against Chrysalis, but the Battle for Equestria following the War. The final showdown to decide between restoration of the old or continued supremacy of the new.


An Epilogue is in the works, actually. Will take a while though, since I want to get it right and have already scrapped my progress and general setting/POV twice now :twilightsmile:

Whoo~hoo~! Can't wait! :rainbowkiss:

Also, now that it's clear that it would be a fight between the restoration of the old and the continuation of the new, there's no way Daybreaker would turn things back to normal on her own now, is there? She'd fight for her reign, her order.
...looks like a civil war, or at least a massive revolt, is inevitable at this point.

Also, the Equestria, or Solar Empire I guess, strongly reminds me of the Soviet Union during WW2. Having a superpower right next door(Changeling Empire/Nazi Germany), ignoring the danger signs(German preparation for a Soviet Invasion after the Battle of Britain/Changelings taking over the deer Kingdom), getting a surprise attack to the face and losing horribly(Operation Barbarossa/Initial Attack of the Changelings), pushing the enemy back after almost losing the capital(Battle of Moscow/Almost losing Canterlot to the Changeling army), running a secret police organization(NKVD/Twilight's Inquisition), and then obliterating the heart of their enemy(Battle of Berlin/Bombing of the Changeling capital). Were you inspired by the USSR's war history?

It's more so the fact that in Equestria at War (a mod for Hearts of Iron 4, which in of itself is a WW2 Strategy game), the war between Changelings and Equestria usually does turn out this way. Equestria is a mix of the USSR and USA, in that it's a waking giant and really pushes the Changelings back unless they can manage to Blitzkrieg them fast.

So it's the in-game Equestria you got the idea from, got it. I still liked how you drew out the inner workings of the nation, instead of portraying it as if we were just staring at a constantly changing map with notifications popping up every five seconds.


So, if I chose this story to post a review, it's not for any reason.
And for me, it is because "A Shattered Crystal" is meant to be understood -even if this may seem disturbing- very seriously.
When I read it, I see interesting questions like "how far must we go to protect a country ?".
And as said like this, it really gives us hope and faith in the story.

But that's where I'm disappointed. (By that, I mean the way it's told)
A lot of clichés are constantly dragging down the plot, in a way that nothing can stand on it's own if you pay too much attention to it.
The charchters are interesting, but the fact they don't have the slightest doubt in their actions, and blindly follow their own viewpoint is really a downside, even if the context of war can justify that kind of mindset in most cases.
And even if it can be entertaining or even funny with a second look, it becomes (for me) a story with a dirty, disturbing, and wrongly utopic message.
A message that fly upside us, like an upsetting feeling, and personnally makes me want to put myself in a lateral security position.

Because even if that message is said with a lot of honesty, by a Celestia sincerely regretting her actions, but still persuaded that those actions were necessary, NO, NO THEY WERE NOT. Even with a lot of sincerity, princess, you're bulshitting me !
And at least, the text is well written, but the morality is so upsetting that it undermines all the rest. And even with a sincerity that I really enjoy from the author, and the love I have for these kinds of stories, this fic, didn't convince me.
As for you, my friend, I'll follow your work from now, and I'm sure that you have the potential to make great stories.
Hell is paved of good intentions, "A Shattered Crystal" is a good exemple of that.

Thank you for the ride,
See ya.

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