• Published 28th Sep 2018
  • 1,946 Views, 38 Comments

In which Spike ... - 00_02



Spike, having found a mare he would spend his life with, experiences relationship troubles and solutions.

  • ...
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In which Spike hands out some Gifts

Author's Note:

Warnings: contains some darkness. Thanks for editing help goes out to Princess Amore Dudette.

Spike's room was a mess, but he couldn't find the energy to clean it. He had eventually fallen asleep after leaving Rising Up, but it had been a restless and haunted night. Now the sun was already nearing its zenith. He hadn't made breakfast for Twilight. He hadn't shown up to work for Applejack. He hadn't gone to help Rarity. Bad dragon. Stupid dragon. Worthless dragon! Maybe, if he just kept lying here, if he didn't get up to eat or to drink, he could just die?

No! He was Twilight’s assistant! He had his tasks, things that his friends needed him to do. Spike fought to rise from his bed, but felt like there was an invisible, incomprehensible weight crushing down on him, making it impossible to move. He wanted to get up, to rage and be angry, but it seemed like his outburst yesterday had consumed the last flickers of flame inside of him. Again and again and again Spike tried to get off his bed, to force his muscles to move, but it still took more than an hour before he finally succeeded.

For Twilight! he thought to himself as he dragged himself through an invisible swamp. For Twilight! It started to get a little easier, especially once he had gotten to his feet, though he was still unsteady. For Twilight! he repeated it like a mantra, like a prayer for strength and willpower. Spike managed to blink away his tears and hide his crushed spirit, so he wouldn’t worry his adoptive sister. By the time he reached the kitchen, it was as if he had left his shackles in the bedroom, and it felt like he was moving almost normally as he prepared lunch for his dear, purple magician.

A knock on the door caused him to walk to the living room, but to his surprise he saw that Twilight had already answered it. Normally it was a fight to tear her away from her beloved books. Realizing that he was a source of worry for Twilight, that his stupidity was keeping her from doing the things she loved, tore at his heart like a wolf’s maw. Four ponies were talking with Twilight – inhabitants of Ponyville: Spike had seen them before, but had never gotten into a conversation with any of them.

“So you see,” one of them explained to the sorceress, “Rising Up is levelling some very serious accusations against your dragon, that he tried to blackmail her into having sex with him or he would get her fired from her current position. Given what happened a couple of years ago, we are all very worried. I want to bring up my foals in a nice, clean neighbourhood, not one where a predator can just extort sexual acts from an innocent mare!”

“What?!” Spike couldn't hold it in. Both Twilight and the villagers turned to him in surprise. “I didn't do anything! I didn't know she thought kissing me was gross! She was the one who started it! I never made her do anything!”

The young dragon saw his sister’s pupils so wide with anxiety that her purple irises were barely visible. As she turned back to the other ponies, he could see her telltale twitch of an onsetting nervous breakdown he had come to know so well.

“I’m sorry, I need you to leave now. And please don’t spread any more lies like that around.”

“But this is clearly …” one of the earth ponies started, but was cut off by Twilight yelling at him: “I said LEAVE! Now! Don’t make me force you!”

As Spike sunk to his knees putting his hands on his head he could hear the villagers talking as they were walking away: “Well, we see now how something like that could have come to pass.“ “Abuse of power, really.” “She wouldn't get away with it if she didn't have such good connections to royalty. Nepotism hard at work.” “A mare in her position shouldn't be friends with someone who is accused of such heinous acts!” “We'll have to talk to the mayor, rally the town if need be ...”

He was ruining everything. EVERYTHING! Now even Twilight was getting damaged by this smear campaign, and only because he had been so stupid, because he had believed it was permissible for him to strive for happiness, for a relationship. He was supposed to help her, to be useful to her, and now he was only causing her sorrow and trouble.

“Spike. Spike! Don't listen to them! They are just some stupid jabbermouths clinging to the latest rumour! There will always be some idiots, just ignore them! I know you! You did nothing wrong!”

Twilight had put her arms around him, trying to comfort him. She was crying. He had made Twilight cry!

Spike felt something inside of him break and shatter.

The one person that he had gotten out of bed for. The one person that he'd fought through the swamp for. The one person that he had served all his life. He had harmed her and caused her to cry.

There was only one thing left to do.

He took a couple of deep breaths to calm himself, sniffled and then looked up at Twilight. It wasn't a smile, but it was as close as he would get to one for now. “I'm okay, Twilight. Please don't cry?”

Twilight gazed at his face through her tears, stroking his head as she did so: “Spikey. Spike. …” What should she say? What could she say?

“It's okay, Twilight. You are right. I must not listen to these ponies. I need to remember who I truly care for, and focus on them.”

Twilight was still worried. But Spike seemed … calmer now. As if he had worked through something and come to a solution. That was good … probably. These accusations were horrible. She was glad that Spike had realized she was right and that he should pay them no heed: she would deal with this issue personally.

Spike rose, and held out his hand to help Twilight to her feet. “I'm sorry I caused you trouble. I've actually started to prepare lunch in the kitchen, and I need to get back so it won't burn. Food will be ready in about half an hour.”

Twilight took her younger brother's hand and pulled herself up using his strength. “Spike! It's never trouble! I love you, and I'll gladly take care of you whenever.”

Spike smiled at her and turned towards the kitchen. “Thanks, Twilight. I'll be back soon.”

As Twilight watched her adopted brother leave, she couldn't shake the feeling that something still was very much not all right.


“Food's delicious!” Twilight mumbled with a full mouth half an hour later at the kitchen table. Spike's cooking was universally good, so she never needed to fib her compliments, but today he had made her favourite, nachos, and they were as mouthwateringly awesome as they had ever been.

Spike smiled and nodded towards the heavy book that was resting next to his sister on the table: “Glad to hear it. I see you've replaced the griffon-text. What's that new thing you are reading?”

Twilight quickly covered part of the book with her sleeve and barely managed to stop her impulse to hide it under her chair. She couldn't possibly let her adopted brother know that she was reading up on dragon psychology since something still felt off to her. The fact that the only book she had been able to find on the topic had been written by a Pegasus who obviously had a very poor opinion of dragons made her all the more eager to keep it a secret.

“Uhm … It's … sort of related. Trying to make sense of some things, and this one is also about flying creatures.” Twilight had never been a good liar.

“All right.” Fortunately for her, Spike did not seem intent on pursuing the topic. “I'll need to go to town later to deliver some things and do some shopping. Is there anything you need?”

Twilight was seriously relieved that Spike was starting to feel better. She had heard him rummage in his room for the last hours, probably cleaning up the mess. After thinking briefly, she replied: “No, thanks, I think I have everything I need. And I just want to say that I think you are really brave in how you are handling this.”

The sad smile that Spike gave her as he picked up her dish to bring to the kitchen almost broke Twilight's heart: “Thank you, Twilight. I'll … try to be brave. When you see Applejack, please tell her that I am really sorry for not finishing the work at her place.”

“I will, Spike. And I'm sure Applejack will understand.” Twilight wouldn't have been able to verbalize how she could discern her brother’s pain by how he moved, but she felt it cut into her soul.


Rarity was trying to complete one of the designs she had been slaving over for the gala, but her heart was not in it. The white unicorn's mind kept returning to that framed picture of her, surrounded but untouched by devastation.

It brought her mind back to Spike's first birthday in Ponyville, when he went on a rampage that threatened to harm anyone who got in his way … anyone except her. Even when his basest instincts overtook him, when he was reduced to barely more than a powerful beast, his love and devotion to her would stay true.

Stopping her work for a moment, Rarity fanned herself: there was something like a source of heat in the centre of her chest.

She had been very briefly tempted to even accept her cute dragon-friend's confession that day … but he was still oh so young, and a dragon. She had stopped him from speaking his heart – an actual romantic relationship between them was just impossible – and only now, years later, she wondered what might have happened had she let him talk on. It wouldn't have worked, of course, it couldn't have, she was looking for a proper gentlecolt to share her life with, someone who matched her in refinement, style and class, and she just couldn't imagine herself showing up to a celebrated social event on the arm of a dragon, even if he had been lauded as a hero! Yes, Spike had a number of admirable qualities and quite in secret she would admit that his strength and sort of … bestial nature maybe held a bit of a rather primal allure, but sharing one's life wasn't just about following one's baser instincts that caused animals to be in heat. Ultimately, she had turned Spike down for his own sake: he needed to find a girl that would love every aspect of him, no matter how hard that might be.

Rarity couldn't shake the thought of a quite disturbing possibility, though, one that haunted her: had maybe her display of affection the day before, her generous reward for Spike's hard work for her, been the cause of the final break between the dragon and Rising Up? Now of course, Rising Up was at fault for having had a sidestep with Fiendishly Rich, which should never, ever happen, but even the very best of ponies make mistakes sometimes, and if she was truly sorry, and willing to make up for her mistake with a lot of tender loving care for Spike, then she should be forgiven for her transgression. Fluttershy had very appropriately reminded her dear friends that they were supposed to be the Elements of Harmony, not some violent vigilantes.

Maybe the sight of her enticing bosom, and knowing that she was presenting it to him without wearing a brassiere, had pushed Spike to deciding that he wanted to end his relationship with Rising Up rather than exercise forgiveness?

Her worry about that possibility was amplified by her knowledge of how she had felt about the relationship from the start. When she had first heard of it she was actually upset, rather than happy for Spike as she should have been, and wistful that at least some of his desiring attentions would now be aimed towards another mare. It hadn’t been made any better by that Spike started to spend all his free time with Rising up. That made sense, of course, but … Rarity had to admit that she loved Spike fawning over her, even more so because he knew that he would never, ever have her, yet he would continue to dote on her anyways. So romantic! No stallion in her entire life had been as devoted and as courteous as Spike. When he had any free time – rare enough as that was with him doing all the housework at Twilight's place, and cooking for her, and working as her assistant – he would come over to spend time with Rarity. He would do the hard manual labour when they went gem hunting, or carry supplies for her, or even support her when she was designing clothes. He was an oh so wonderfully and adorably patient helper.

And he didn't just go with her out of some sense of obligation or with ulterior motives, like some stallions had when they accompanied her on her shopping trips or when she went to inspect other designers’ creations. All the while they would look bored, just waiting for it to end. No, Spike found joy in these activities, not because they necessarily aligned with his interests, but because they were with and for her. Rarity could feel the loving smile on her face, and felt like the fine clothes she was wearing were restricting her breathing slightly. Spike truly was a fine young dragon, no, the finest.

Rarity remembered being a little unhappy when Spike started spending more time helping Applejack as well, but could understand how that was needed. She had heard that the farmers were going through a spot of trouble because of the weather recently, so Spike's hardworking nature was doubtlessly appreciated at the apple acres. The white unicorn slightly disapproved that he was … basically digging around in dirt, but all that farm work did have the effect of him building up quite an impressive physique. She saw him a little less, but when she did he no longer was the oddly proportioned little baby dragon but a muscular man in his prime with broad shoulders and a wide chest. This would have been fine, but then out of nowhere he suddenly had a girlfriend that she had never, ever heard of! Rarity had been shocked, and in fact not happy at all for Spike like she should have been. A fine Element of Generosity she was! Of course she fought and overcame this initial impulse: Spike finally having a ladyfriend was wonderful (though from what she had seen the young – oh so young – mare lacked a couple of qualities to actually be considered a proper lady), and she wished the two of them happiness together – Spike had certainly earned that. It had been a surprise, of course, that a mare could see past his … well, species, and appreciate the wonderful gentleman hid inside … but a good one, really! If anyone deserved to be in a happy romantic relationship, surely it would be Spike! Rarity just wished she could also find her own prince charming. Time was waiting for no one and she wasn't getting any younger! But … Spike! He had still come over regularly to help, but his time had ever more dwindled, and he had actually become a bit more resistant to Rarity's … sentiments of appreciation (those were not teasing, certainly!). Oddly enough, when Spike was no longer available and stopped endlessly fawning and chasing after her, that made him … more interesting to Rarity, somehow. So maybe her confoundment that her teasing … her sentiments of appreciation! were no longer quite as effective as they used to be, and her missing the devoted attention of the young dragon had led her to be … a bit more forward than she probably should have been.

Rarity sighed, putting down the dress she had been slaving over for the past hours: a lovely evening gown of dark blue silk, embroidered with silver lilies stitched in as if they were growing from the hem, one of her best creations, no doubt, but the stitching was a major piece of work.

She owed Spike an apology. Thinking back over the past years, the hundreds, no, thousands of hours he had spent helping her, maybe she owed him more than that.

A soft knock on the door caught her attention. Who might that be, at this hour?

“Come in, please, it's open!”

She was truly surprised when she saw her young dragon friend. Spike had seemed so devastated yesterday that he was the last person she would have expected, but he appeared to be a lot better.

“Spike, Darling, how wonderful to see you. Believe it or not, I was just thinking about you right this moment!”

Spike's tone was firm, it held a seriousness that she wasn't used from him: “Hello, Rarity, I'm sorry to bother you. I know you have a lot of work to do, so I won't keep you for long. I just wanted to quickly bring you this, then I'll be on my way.”

Spike was holding a basket of some sort.

“Oh, Spike, that's very sweet of you. You didn't have to do that.”

Rarity's automatic gift appreciation routine kicked in as she moved over to receive whatever Spike had brought her.

“And you know that you are always welcome here and I am always happy to spend time with y...ou.”

Her last word came out a little mangled as she saw what actually was in the rather unimpressive wooden basket. It was filled almost to the brim with an assortment of colourful gems.

“Why Spike, that is very, very sweet of you, but I am not even quite sure if I can accept such a gracious gift. I do not have anything with which I could return the favour.”

“That's ok. I just want you to have them. That was all. I know I haven't been around as much to help you with gem hunts, and that you really like using them for your dresses. I am sorry that I am not able to help you more.” The young dragon's speech came with quick determination, Rarity discerned that he probably had already thought about this for a while.

“Why, Darling, that is remarkably generous of you. You are such a nice and helpful young man, any Lady would be lucky to have you …”

“Then would you?” Spike cut in. “Would you like to have me?”

“I … why …” Rarity stuttered, utterly unprepared for the young dragon to interrupt her, or to call her out.

“I thought so.” Spike's voice held a lot less hurt than she would have expected. “Thank you for everything, and good bye, Rarity.”

He was out the door before Rarity had managed to compose herself.

That had been odd. Spike never interrupted her, or pressured her as he had just now, and Rarity quite did not like it. His gift was really nice, and her mind was already thinking of several of her creations that she could improve with this quite eclectic assortment of gems, but she felt a tiny bit guilty accepting it, since this basket must have contained most gems that Spike owned. She was a little torn, but returning it now would be exceptionally awkward as well. Contemplating what had happened, Rarity came to the conclusion that Spike was probably just acting a little out of it because he was still affected by his breakup with Rising Up … that poor boy.

Rarity thought she had seen Spike hold one last gem in his hand as he left, a blue sapphire if she wasn't mistaken, that somehow seemed a little familiar.


Because Spike usually handled the shopping, Twilight didn’t come into town often. She spent most of her time reading and studying, so she didn't know where Spike usually made his purchases. He hadn't been at home, so the next logical place to look for him was where he had said he would be, and that was in town. Asking around all the shopkeepers would take an unacceptable amount of time, and most would have closed by now since it was already dark, but fortunately it was almost inconceivable that Spike would come to the main part of Ponyville without paying a visit to the Carousel Boutique.

Twilight had finally found information that might pertain to Spike's situation – not in that stupid book about dragons, but actually in a book about pony psychology. Twilight couldn’t be sure, but she was very, very worried that it did. She wanted to speak to Spike to either confirm or alleviate her fears. Her knocking on the door to Rarity's boutique was both urgent and insistent. It did not take too long for her to hear the fashionista's voice: “Coming, coming!”

Rarity eyed Twilight nonplussed as she opened the door: “Twilight, Darling, what a nice surprise to see you! What brings you here on this fine evening?”

Twilight pushed past Rarity urgently looking for her younger brother: “Things are not ok. Please tell me that you have seen Spike!”

“Why yes, he was here maybe an hour ago. Such a sweet and delightful boy, he actually gave me this whole basket of gems! And I desperately needed them to spice up some of my creations …”

Twilight was obviously no longer listening: “Oh no ...”

Rarity was somewhat peeved by this, her tone getting slightly sharp: “What do you mean, 'Oh no'?! They are his gems, he can give them to whoever he wants. And if he so happens to be inclined to gift them to me ...”

Twilight interrupted the white mare with a grave tone: “Rarity, the reason he gave you these gems is because he plans to die!”

“Nonsense, Spike would never …” Rarity stared at Twilight, the sentence hanging unfinished between them for several seconds while Rarity's eyes slowly grew in diameter, before she suddenly raced out the boutique as fast as she had ever run in her life.

Twilight quickly caught up with her. The beautiful high heels Rarity was wearing were excellent in accentuating her already long slim legs and her enchanting derrière, but they certainly were not made for running. Rarity didn't even know where she was running, only that she had to find Spike before … something unimaginable happened. Twilight overtook Rarity, she seemed to know where she had to run. As Twilight’s lead grew, Rarity stopped and kicked off her shoes to somewhere in the darkness … they had been fine shoes, expensive shoes, adorned with blue sapphires as befitted her, but she just couldn't run fast enough in them. She grit her teeth as she picked up the pace, feeling fresh tears running down her face. Applejack and Rainbow Dash might be fine running barefoot, but Rarity's feet were pedicured to perfection, soft and smooth and supple to the touch. Definitely not meant for running over rough ground. It really hurt, but she would not slow down.

At the junction where the small path to their yellow-coated pegasus friend's abode strayed from the main road, Twilight briefly stopped and yelled at the top of her lungs, “FLUTTERSHY!” She then rushed on without waiting for a response. The momentary pause gave Rarity the chance to catch up with the purple sorceress.

Twilight actually ran to her own house, throwing the door open without bothering to close it, which allowed Rarity to pass through soon after her. She could see the purple pony run to the back of the house, to where Spike's room was, and as Rarity followed she noticed to her chagrin that she was leaving bloody footprints behind. The white unicorn had always abhorred dirt and hated that she was staining her friend’s fine floor, but right now was not the time to worry about such things. Without slowing down, she followed Twilight all the way to Spike’s room, nestled in the back part of the house.

The small enclave had been cleaned from the inferno as much as possible, and there were four neat piles each of which had a little sign on them: “For Applejack”, “For Rainbow Dash”, “For Fluttershy” and “For Pinkie Pie.”.

There were about a dozen crumpled papers in Spike's trash can, and a single note on his desk that simply read:

I'm sorry, Twilight.

I love you

Spike